What I will be, I was
by Cerulean1
Summary: Once confined to fantasy and science fiction, time travel is now simply an engineering problem. - MICHIO KAKU Unless it wasn't, 100,000 years ago. FemShep/Liara. There is no science, but lots of plot holes and paradoxes, here. Fair warning.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note: I felt the need to Deus ex Machina ME3s friggin' Deus ex Machina. It was supposed to be a quick, three part story. It's not going to be, it's taken on a life of its own. Just a quick note on changes from ME3s ending though**

**- Shepards ground team did not magically get teleported back to to Normandy, that's just stupid. More so than anything else in the end. So stupid, in fact, that I'm ignoring the fact that Liara stepped out of it in the cut scene. However, anyone not with Shepard on the final run was assumed to be aboard. **

**-Additionally, do to a series of messages I recieved, you should know Shepard is human, with an estimated lifespan of about 150-200 years. Take that as you will, but consider yourself warned. (This DOES have a happy ending though)**

**Disclaimer: If you don't know them, I probably made them up. Otherise they belong to Bioware and EA. I promise to put them back when I'm done.**

**Edit: Typos and grammatical errors **

* * *

South Florida 2493

Illira leaned back on her hands, her toes digging into the warm sand. She named the stars she knew, finding Mars among the hulking debris of Reapers. They'd be passing through the main part of the debris field starting in a few hours. Already bits of dead machines were casting long trails in the night sky as they burned up in the Earth's atmosphere. When she had been very small, her mother had told her that every year, on the day they passed through the field, the light streaming through the sky was her father telling her how much she loved her. Though almost three hundred years later, and she knew that wasn't true, she still whispered, "I love you too, Dad," as the the fireballs crossed the sky.

She twisted her head, hoping to see her mother walking down the beach, but the long expanse of beach was empty. No one cared much about the Reaper War much anymore. The fact that Illira's father had scarified herself to save all the people in the galaxy was lost to all except the Krogan and the Asari. And even they had fallen into some bad habits trapped as they were in the Sol system. But she and her mother always came together to watch, to remember. Her mother would tell her stories of when she'd travel with the crew of the Normandy. Of the first time Illira's father had died, the come back to her. Of the life they had wanted together.

It was the only time she and her mother saw each other anymore. For the last century they had been at odds. Illira had begun working with the Asari consulate on Mars, her mother had stayed on Earth. And in her time on the red planet she had heard things about one Dr. Liara T'Soni that had made her wish she could change her name. Race traitor, some of them had called her, though mentally ill was more common. Her coworkers hadn't even bothered to hide the fact that her pure-blood mother was a source of serious scorn among other Asari.

Growing up the only other asari she'd ever had any real contact with the Justicar Samara. And the older asari had never spoken of the fact that her mother had actively avoided finding another lover, even one that was not a bondmate. Or the fact that she worked for the human Alliance. In fact, Samara had always been almost sympathetic to the way her mother had acted. But Illira had listened to her peers, and confronted her mother. When the often stoic doctor had broken down into tears, rather than comfort her, Illira had stormed away.

They now only spoke on this day.

The day Illira's father had died.

Illira fingered the small piece of metal in her pocket. Her way of making everything up to her mother, and fixing things that went wrong so long ago. If she actually showed up today.

"Hello, Illira," came a soft voice from behind her. The asari matron turned her head again and saw her mother walking barefoot along the beach, her sandals held in one hand.

"Hi, Mom. I didn't think you were going to make it."

"I missed the first shuttle. Where's Nillye?"

Her mother always asked after Illira's bondmate. They'd met about six years before, and though most asari still had mixed feelings about pure-blood relationships, the fact that the war had left so few of them in the system had left them turning a blind eye if the post-war babies tended to bond with other asari. It took a bit of the stigma away from her mother, but the doctor's other peculiarities meant she was more or less shunned by other asari anyway.

"At home," Illira said, tilting her head toward the small house just off the beach. "She said it was too muggy to sit out here."

"And how is work on my granddaughter going?"

"Mom! Jeez."

Her mother chuckled, looking up at the stars. "That well, huh?"

"Honestly, mother."

"You entered your Matron years almost four years ago, Illira. You're going to start getting antsy if you don't do something about the lack of toddlers in your home soon."

"MOM!"

Her mother shrugged, smiling.

"Your father wanted a lot of children. I never knew her before...everything...but she'd talk about it sometimes. Wanting a large family. She used to say that she'd always wanted boys, and that we'd have to have twice as many daughters to make up for it. She'd have adored you."

They lapsed into silence. Ten minutes later the sky seemed to catch fire. No longer just the occasional red trail of burning debris, as the Earth passed back through the heart of the remains of the Reapers and galactic fleets the individual streams of light merged, became a shower of sparks lighting up the night sky. It would last for the next two weeks, day and night, but this was the first night. The night her father died.

They'd found her body in the rubble of London, still breathing, but it hadn't lasted long. She'd been dead before they had gotten her to the field hospital.

Her mother had been less than a week pregnant. Her father had never known their attempts to start a family had succeeded.

Her father had never known about her.

They sat under the ever brightening sky for a little over an hour. It was past midnight now, and the breeze from the water had died.

"Come on up to the house. I'm sure Nillye is still awake. I made up the spare room, too, if you want to stay."

"I'd like that."

The house was bright, clean, and homey. There were a few digital holos on the end tables, and photographs on the walls. It was a hobby Liara had picked up when Illira had been a baby, and had passed on to her daughter. The basement of the house was an old fashioned dark room, and an old silver nitrate camera sat on the coffee table.

"Dr. T'Soni!" Nillye called from the kitchen as mother and daughter stepped into the house. She had heavy pink markings on her indigo skin, and her eyes were a bright, shining green. Liara could see what her daughter found attractive in the other asari, and the woman had a heart almost as big as Illira's father's.

"How many times do I have to tell you to call me mom? Or at least Liara."

"Right, Dr- um, Liara. I was just on my way to bed, but make yourself at home." She came out of the kitchen, wiping her hands on a towel. She kissed Illira on the cheek, smiled at her mother-in-law, and climbed the stairs.

They watched her go, then Illira, under the pretense of taking her mother to the spare bedroom, led the older woman down to the basement. Liara paused at the darkroom, impressed with the collection of antique machines and modern reproductions her daughter had collected. When she caught up with Illira at the end of the hall, though, it was clear the room she was headed for was not a spare bedroom at all.

"What is this?" she asked, glancing curiously at her daughter.

"An apology."

"An- for what, Illy?"

"For being here when dad isn't. And, well, you'll find out." Illira said, walking into the room.

"Don't be a fool. I...we...don't ever think that." She couldn't find the words for what she was, for the years she hadn't been the perfect parent because she kept seeing her lover in her daughter's eyes. She'd never blamed the child for her father's death, though, had never wished to trade the life she had had with her daughter for more time with her bondmate.

The room Illira had led her to was mostly empty. In the center was a long table, with a small box on it, and a photo album. She knew it, it was the one she'd made of Illira. She'd left it with her daughter over a hundred years before, when they'd fallen out. Her daughter took a long piece of black metal from her pocket, and dropped it into the box.

"I'm so sorry, mom. This is for the best, it has to be done. You can...I put all the information you've collected in the photo album. On the Catalyst. On the crucible. On everything. Everything we've learned. Everything you've done. Fix it. I love you mom, I love you so much."

Illira stepped out of the room, and shut the door before Liara could reach it. She banged her fists against the heavy wooden door.

"Illira! What are you doing! What is this?"

The box on the table had begun to glow. Captivated, she moved toward it, absently picking up the photo album and holding it to her chest. The glow increased, bathing Liara in a heavy yellow light.

"Illi-"

* * *

"-ra?" There was a burning pain in her side, and she was no longer standing. A warm rumble pressed against her back. The photo album was still clutched in her hand. The cotton sun dress she'd been wearing in the Florida heat was gone, replaced by the white body armor she hadn't worn since she'd first felt the stirrings of the mind growing inside her.

"Dr. T'Soni? Hold on, we'll be out of the system shortly. Your plan worked. The ship is destroyed." Liara lifted her head, noticing that it felt a lot heavier than she ever remembered. Feron sat at the controls of a small shuttle. Glyph hovered beside him, and she was crammed between the components they'd had time to save. She remembered this, this run from Cerberus all those years ago.

"Where...what happened?" she choked out.

"Don't speak, Liara. You've lost a lot of blood. I've stopped it, and the medi-gel is working, but we really need to get you to a hospital. We'll be through the relay soon."

Straining against the fatigue that she hadn't felt just minutes before, when she was standing in her daughters house, she opened the photo album on her lap.

It was as she remembered it. Photos taken by the few friends she'd still had on Earth. Days out with Tali, her belly swollen with the life she and her lover had created. And then, in the hospital, the tiny little Illira, wrapped safely in the birthing creche, Liara laying beside her - the umbilical cords still joining them. The baby, growing into a happy toddler. A bright child. When she lost her baby teeth, when her crest began to separate fully. The first day of school, the day she graduated. All there.

And yet, it couldn't be. Or she couldn't be where she was. An hallucination. She'd wake up, back on the beach. She'd fallen asleep on the sand, and this was all a dream. A dream, because she had run from Hagalaz three hundred years ago, two years before her daughter had taken her first breath. Six months before she'd been reunited with Shepard. And none of these pictures would happen for years, and the photo album wouldn't even exist until well after the war was over. Well after they laid Commander Shepard in the ground.

The tears came unbidden. She wanted this second chance, but she didn't want to loose her daughter. She couldn't come to terms with what she wanted to be true. She flipped to the last page of the album. When she'd made it, it had held Shepard's dog tags, and the letter of condolence from the Alliance, but those were gone. Liara tried to sit up straighter, but the pain ripped through her abdomen. She settled for just readjusting the book on her lap. Javik's memory shard – the only piece of personal property Shepard had had on her person when she'd been found, was in a plastic bag where the dog tags had been. And taped to the other side, on the back cover, was an envelope.

Telling herself it was still all just a dream, despite the pain in her side, she debated just ignoring it. The flowery script on the front was clearly Illira's, and if she read it, if she opened it and it confirmed the sinking feeling that had begun to settle in her stomach, she wasn't sure what she would do. She shifted again, and the pain in her side had dulled. Shepard had always told her that was a bad thing. That when the pain began to fade, you were just that much closer to dying.

But she hadn't died here.

Feron had taken her to an asari colony and she'd been back on the ship and on her way to Mars in just a couple hours. She looked down at the wound in her side, Feron had bandaged it, and he'd said he put medi-gel on it. That would explain why the pain was receding.

Figuring the worst that could happen was that what she already suspected was true would be confirmed, Liara tore the envelope from the album.

"We're through the relay. We will be landing shortly. Stay with me, Liara."

"I'm okay," Liara said, though she felt anything but.

The front of the envelope simply said "To my mother", in her daughter's handwriting. She opened the envelope with a shaking hand, and removed the paper from within. It was written in asari, though in human characters. Her daughter had never gotten the hang of the asari alphabet, and Liara had never pressed the issue.

_Mom, _the letter read,

_I'm sorry. I know that does not make it easier. Nillye and I have been working on this for years. She found something when she was in the arctic. I never told you about that trip, I wish I hadn't been so horrible to you. I wish I had understood. I do now, and I know that Dad...if Dad had lived that things would have been so much different. Don't worry about me, Mom. I guess I don't even exist, right? Don't worry, we'll meet again. I won't remember, but hopefully you will. I think you will. Everything we found says you will._

_ There are things you need to know. Things I wish I could have told you in person, but I know you wouldn't have come with me if I'd tried talking to you about it first._

_ You can't tell anyone. Except Dad, she'll need to know how to fix everything. Everything she needs is in the Prothean shard. I don't know if you ever used it, you should. Before you give it to her. She used it. She really loved you. There are things on it she needs to see, to help her understand what happened and what will happen._

_ The device Nillye found should take you back to just before the battle for Earth. I don't know how much farther, but no more than a year or two. Only what's in the shard needs to be done, only the code on the Citadel tower. Use the shard, you'll understand. I don't know what changing anything else will do, but if you want to visit Dad, well, you know where the information on the Crucible is, so it shouldn't take you as long to find it this time. Not that I want you to, or that I think you should, but Nillye said you might want to._

_ And know I love you Mom. Everything I've said, everything I've done, I'm so sorry. This doesn't make up for it, but maybe the savior of the galaxy will get her parade. I wish I could have found the words to tell you before now. I didn't know how to make it better. Tell Dad I love her. _

_ Take care Grandma,_

_ Your loving daughter,_

_ Illira._

Taped to the bottom of letter was a memory chip. She peeled it off the paper, and reached over to the stack of datapads stacked beside her. The chip wasn't compatible. She dug through the pile, looking for another model. The shuttle was making its decent onto the colony when she found one that the chip would work with. The screen blinked, then showed a video. Liara watched it, awed.

She had a very similar video in the deepest memory of her Omni-tool. Hers was dated over three hundred years before. This one was dated a week ago. Or was it that hers was from over a year from now, and this was from three hundred years after that. She'd have to ask EDI.

She could ask EDI.

Her daughter was going to be a father, and she could talk to EDI.

Whether blood loss, or just mental overload, Liara felt herself begin to pass out.

"Congrats, baby," she whispered before her world went dark.

Commander Shepard leaned against the headboard, grabbed a slice of toast from her breakfast tray and went back to reading War and Peace. The bed was too soft, the toast didn't taste like cardboard, and it had actual orange marmalade on it, not re-hydrated grape flavored jelly. It would be heaven if it didn't feel quite so much like hell. Her trial had ended a week ago, and despite a rocky start, it didn't look like they'd actually court martial her. They stripped her of her rank, stuck her in this fancy prison, took away the Normandy and had prevented anyone she knew from contacting her. It was all that she expected, but that didn't mean she had to like it.

There was a knock at her door just as she was shoving the last of the toast her mouth.

"'M Dee-thent," she said around the mouthful of bread, knowing that the only person who ever knocked before entering was her guard.

"Hey, Commander," James said, stepping into the room as the door slid open, "Sentencing."

Shepard brushed the crumbs from her hands, tossed the datapad onto the bed and followed James out of the room.

"You shouldn't call me that anymore."

"Yeah, well, I still have hope, Commander."

Shepard chuckled, following the Lieutenant through the maze of corridors that made up Alliance Headquarters in Vancouver.

She didn't see a pair of blue eyes spot her around the corner. She didn't see those eyes fill with tears. She didn't see the woman attached to those eyes turn around, shoulder's squared, hugging a large brown leather book to her chest.

Two hours later she stepped back into the hallway, no worse off than when she'd stepped in. The Reapers were likely going to have a walk in the park with her locked in a small room on the fifth floor of the Alliance building, but she'd known the score when she'd turned herself in. But it didn't help that they refused to listen to her. They hadn't even let her say a word today. They'd lectured, and scolded, and shook their heads in unison. Then they'd sent her back to her well decorated cell.

"Sorry about that, Commander."

"Seriously, Lieutenant. Keep that up and we'll end up being neighbors."

"I'll let you borrow a cup a sugar whenever you want, Commander."

Shepard laughed, shaking her head at the young man. "Shepard, Lieutenant. Just call me Shepard."

"Yes, ma'am." He opened the door to her cell, then locked the door when she was inside.

He sauntered down to the end of the hall, chuckling to himself. He heard the voices before he saw who they were attached too.

"Look, ma'am, I'm very sorry, but Ms. Shepard isn't allowed any visitors. If you'd li-"

"_Commander_ Shepard just saved all you from the Rea- from the Geth and the Collectors. Look, I know Admiral Hackett. I'm sure if you just call hi-"

"Ma'am, I'm very sorry. If you'll just go back to the lobby, I'll see what I can do. But you can't be up here."

James rounded the corner and saw Ensign Chase, a young, eager woman with bright blond hair and the most rapturous smile, and an asari holding a large book and wearing a long blue and white dress in her native cut. Ensign Chase had the look of a cornered deer plastered on her face, and James was fairly certain that in another few minutes the asari would be past the young woman one way or another.

"Problem, ladies?" he said, leaning casually against the wall. Both women turned toward him, one pale, and thankful, the other blue and furious. It brought a smile to his face.

The ensign saluted, standing at attention. The asari marched toward him, her icy blue eyes on fire. "Yes. There is a problem, James. I just came from the Mars Archives and I need to speak with Shepard immediately. It's important."

He stared at her blankly. She blinked, waiting. Then said, with a tone reminiscent of a practiced speech, "My name is Dr. Liara T'Soni, I am a Prothean expert sent by Admiral Hackett to the Archives. I have to get the information I found to Commander Shepard immediately."

"Dr. T'Soni, of course," James said, moving away from the wall and holding out a hand, "I've heard a lot about you. Unfortunately, I can't let you back there. Why don't you let Ensign Chase take you back to the lobby, and I'll personally come get you when you have clearance."

"Don't talk down to me, Mr. Vega. I don't know who you think you are, but-"

James held up his hands, only vaguely curious how she knew his name, "Whoa, take a breath. I'm sure it won't take long, but you really can't be back here. Ensign, go get clearance for the good doctor. We'll wait here."

The ensign gave him a quick salute, and scurried off to find someone to let Liara in to see the commander. James motioned to a chair by the elevator, that just happened to be past the security check point. Convenient, simple, and the asari was not throwing biotic balls of lightening around. Which, if half the stories he'd heard from Commander Shepard were true, was not outside the realm of possibilities for Liara T'Soni.

T'Soni sat on one of the plastic benches, legs crossed, toe tapping with an air of impatience that was nothing like the woman Shepard had talked about. She kept opening the book on her lap; there were pictures, the old kind, printed on paper, inside. She never went past the first couple pages, before shutting in quickly. He moved over to her, wondering what the images were of. Anything recent would have been on a holo, and those looked more like the pictures his grandmother had hung on her walls.

He glanced down the hall, trying to see if Chase was coming back, but the hallway was empty. He moved over to sit beside the asari, sitting straight beside her, trying not to look like he was trying sneak a peak at what was in her book.

"Is there something you wish to talk about Lieutenant?" she asked, closing the book and putting it on the bench on her other side. She left her hand on it, though.

"How you know me, for one thing. 'Cause I'm fairly certain I'd remember, well," he let his eyes trail over her body, Shepard would kick his ass if she saw, but he couldn't help it, "you."

The look in her eyes softened, and small smile danced across her lips. If her knowledge of his name had left him only mildly curious, the new look in her eyes left him frightened. He'd seen it on his buddy's mother's faces when they all piled off the transport for shore leave. But it had never been directed at him before, this look like they're seeing someone they thought was dead, had steeled themselves to the fact that they were dead, but now they were standing in front of them. He tried to think of something witty, something clever to change that look, get it away from him. Sometimes he felt like he knew this woman, just from the way Shepard had talked about her, but he knew Shepard had never tried to contact anyone outside the base, was only too aware that she hadn't spoken to the asari since before she turned herself in. So, then, he had to wonder why she looked like she knew him.

"It's fairly common knowledge, Mr. Vega, that Commander Shepard is the only prisoner on this block with a full time guard. It is also fairly common knowledge that you volunteered to guard her door. And, as there was no one else down that hallway, it's not a large jump to say you are James Vega. Was I incorrect?"

Her voice had changed, there's something darker about it, and he knew she was lying. Why, he couldn't fathom; he'd remember meeting her. His own research said she was an information broker on Illium, and perhaps that's where she got the information. Perhaps she simply dug it up. But there would be no reason to hide that. The soldier in him said he should remove her from the blocks now, that if she's lying about how she knew him then it probably wasn't wise to leave her alone with Shepard. The self preservationist in him told him that if he tried he'd have two very beautiful, very angry women trying to kill him. And he didn't want to tick Shepard off, let alone her talented biotic girlfriend.

"No, I guess not. Just, I know Shepard hasn't had any contact with anyone off base, and well, you being her, well, hers, or is she yours? How does that work? Anyway, it seemed strange is all."

"Nothing strange about it," she said defensively.

"Sure, but, never mind."

She let it drop and James sat in an awkward silence with her, waiting for Chase to return. He hoped she got clearance for T'Soni. He didn't want to send her away, Shepard needed a pick-me-up after the tribunal had more or less eaten her alive less than an hour ago. A minute went by. Five. He tried to think of something else to say, but nothing came to him. She fiddled with her Omni-tool, changing settings on it.

"New version?" he asked, just trying to break the silence. He hadn't changed his since he got his first one, but he knew more than one person who updated theirs on an almost weekly basis.

"What? Oh, no." It flashed once then disappeared. They lapsed into silence again.

The silence stretched, uncomfortable and heavy between them. Vega kept opening his mouth say something, then changing his mind. He looked like a gasping fish and he knew it, but every thought that crossed his mind to say generally resulted in Shepard throwing him out her cell window when she heard about it. Harmless flirting was one thing, pressing an advantage you didn't have was another. Finally, when he thought that he was just about to take Liara back to Shepard, clearance be damned, the elevator dinged and Chase had scurried half way down the hall before he could get her attention.

"Lieutenant," she said, snapping to attention, "Dr. T'Soni has supervised visitation clearance." She handed James a datapad, which he began to read before noticing that the asari was already past them and down the hall. He shoved it back into the ensign's hands and trotted after the doctor.

She'd slowed when she had gotten around the corner, aware that she didn't know what room Shepard was in, and James quickly caught up with her.

"275," he said, moving in front of her to the door. He knocked, which surprised her.

"I'm decent, what the hell do they want now?" came the answer to his knock.

James watched the play of emotions on Shepard's face as she took in Liara standing beside him. He took a half step out of the way to the let the asari pass him. He wasn't an expert at reading aliens, or humans, for that matter, but he thought he had a good sense for what people were feeling. What he saw on Dr. T'Soni's face confused him, though. If Shepard was to be believed, and he had no reason to doubt her, she had said goodbye to the woman slowly walking past him just days before showing up in Earth space and offering herself up for trial. The look on Shepard's face was what he expected, welcome surprise after a two month absence; the flicker of a smile, the way she stood up just a little bit straighter, and the fact that she was looking right into the doctor's eyes. T'Soni's reaction though was drastically different. Perhaps it was a lack of understanding of asari, but all her reactions to him earlier had been human enough for him to gauge. Now, though, rather than a slow smile, and a confidant posture – what he would expect if, say, his old girlfriend suddenly showed up to visit him if he hadn't been the one to call it off – T'Soni looked scared. Her eyes were wide, and he saw her hands shaking. She wouldn't catch the Commander's eyes, and he fairly certain that she was about to cry.

"Hey, Liara. I thought-"

What Shepard thought was cut off as Liara reached her. Blue hands reached out and cupped Shepard's face, thumbs brushing her eyes, fingers dancing over her cheeks. She mapped Shepard's face with her hands, like a blind man. James saw tears fall and he shrugged uncomfortably.

"I've missed you," Liara whispered, her hands suddenly going to the back of the Commander's head and pulling her into a heady kiss. James cleared his throat, but the asari didn't hear him. The hand that wasn't tangled in the mass of hair at Shepard's neck was now tracing it's way down her body. Shepard fell into the kiss, wrapping her arms around Liara, hugging her close to her. James cleared his throat again, louder this time, and Shepard's eyes, half closed before, shot open. Liara either hadn't heard, or didn't care.

"Liara," Shepard said, trying to get the other woman's attention, but instead of working, the husky sound of her voice not only made James that much more uncomfortable, but simply made Liara growl and recapture the Commander's mouth.

James wasn't entirely sure what to do. The door to the hall was still open, and he was fairly certain that the right thing was to step through it and close the door. But he couldn't. Ensign Chase had said supervised visits, which meant he couldn't leave the two of them alone, no matter how much, and clearly it was a lot, they wanted to be. He tried to look at the coffee maker, the books stacked on the counter, but his eyes kept going back to the entangled bodies in the middle of the room. Shepard was still attempting to get the asari's attention, but everything she tried was failing. James shifted uncomfortably as he noticed the asari's hands going for the button on Shepard's pants.

"Um," he started to say, when there was a hum, and a tingling in the air. Shepard made a noise somewhere between a moan and a whimper. Suddenly the two in front of him were encased in the blue glow of biotics.

Idiot, was all he could think as he pulled his gun. He hadn't even considered that this wasn't actually Liara T'Soni. But, then, the Commander had reacted as if it was. Then why the hell was she...

He never finished the thought because just as suddenly as they had arrived, the biotics were gone. Liara had jumped about three feet away from Shepard and was about the shade of an overripe blueberry.

"Oh Goddess, I'm sorry," she said, hiding her face in her hands. Shepard looked unsteady, blinking rapidly and breathing hard. Vega couldn't really blame her; he was having a hard time catching his own breath. He kept the gun trained on Liara, though, despite his discomfort.

"You okay, Commander?"

"Mmn? What? Yeah, I'm okay," she answered, swollen lips working into a slow smile and walking on shaking legs to sit down. "Damn, Liara. I should go to prison more often."

It hadn't seemed possible, but Liara actually went a few shades darker.

She also noted the gun pointed at her for the first time.

"I..," she started to say, but Shepard had apparently gotten control of herself.

"Put the gun away, Lieutenant. She wasn't trying to hurt me."

T'Soni eyes widened, "No! I would never, I wasn't...I was...I didn't...that, it's not. I..." Her blush, which when faced with the weapon and begun to fade, came back in full force.

James reluctantly holstered the gun, Shepard clearly wasn't hurt, but he was going to keep a closer eye on the doctor from now on.


	2. Chapter 2

"What exactly did I do to deserve that, anyway?" Shepard asked when Vega had finally backed down.

"I just...I've missed you," Liara whispered, moving over to sit beside Shepard on the bed. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to," she sighed, her blush returning a third time, "I just got a little carried away."

"I noticed. I missed you too, by the way." Shepard leaned into Liara, bumping into her playfully. It didn't produce the desired giggle, but Liara at least finally met her eyes.

James moved away from the door, his eyes still on Liara. What trust he had felt for her, built of Shepard's stories, and the bit of him that had a difficult time mistrusting a beautiful woman, was gone. Maybe her biotics hadn't been an attempt to hurt the Commander, but twice fooled is dead when you're a marine. Hell, once fooled is dead, but he'd caught a break.

Liara kept glancing at the Lieutenant, uncomfortable with his presence, but knowing better than to say anything. She clutched at her photo album, her lifeline in a world that was upside down, where memories overlapped and she couldn't remember what was real anymore. She knew James, had worked with him, trusted her life to him, and had never once been disappointed, but he didn't know her, didn't know about a past that was his future. She rubbed her temples. Her head hurt more often than it had her entire life, usually when the paradoxical nature of what she was still convincing herself was a dream came to her attention.

"You okay?" Shepard asked, watching her pinch the bridge of her nose.

"Yeah, there's just so much I need to tell you, and I don't know how to start. It's been so long."

"If you give me that 'We're different people' speech again, I'm going to call bullshit," Shepard said, laughing. She reached out to take Liara's hand, her face falling when the asari hesitated.

"No, not that," Liara said, finally taking Shepard's hand. Though she thought perhaps she was a different person, more so than ever before. She was over four hundred years old, though her body was what it had been when she was 109, before the baby. She had watched the woman beside her fight waves of reapers, and laid her in the ground, and had, with as much composure as her then-hormonally charged body would allow, accepted both the Commander's dog tags and the folded Alliance flag from Admiral Hackett. She had raised their daughter, lost her, and had just begun to get her back when she'd been tossed into this dream. This dream where Shepard was there, and she felt like she always had and she radiated compassion and worry and strength and something that was just...Shepard. "Hackett asked me to go to the Mars Archives."

"What for?" Shepard moved up on the bed, crossing her legs and leaning back on her hands.

"I..." she considered her answer carefully, "I don't know what he wanted me to find, but I found a blueprint for a weapon. A weapon that can destroy the Reapers."

She had gone to the Archives. Had spent four weeks there, attempting to let events unfold the way they had as closely as possible. She'd discovered the blueprints for the Crucible on the memory chip that held Nillye's ultrasound. Along with Illira's graduation thesis: 'Power Output and it's effect on Mass Effect fields.' It contained the data she'd managed to salvage from Ilos, and from the beacon on Thessia. She had everything they needed to build and complete the Crucible before the Reapers had done more than singe the Batarians. She'd dug up the information, planted what would take too long to find, and then let one of the researchers there 'find' it with her.

Which is when she had finally realized that it didn't matter anymore. If it was an overly complicated and detailed dream, then she'd wake up on the sand and nothing would matter. And if it wasn't a dream, then perhaps she could save the lives of a lot of people. She'd arrived on Earth less than a day later.

Shepard jumped up, staring at Liara with excited, wide eyes, "Will it work?"

Liara nodded, "Yes. It's...complicated. But we have to get you out of here. The Reapers will be here in four months. They will hit Palaven and Earth. Thessia. We have to stop it."

"Four- how do you know?" James asked, stepping away from the counter where he'd been standing.

Liara cursed, making Shepard raise an eyebrow, then said, "I can't explain. Not aloud," she sighed. Dream or not, James would kick her out if she started talking about time travel. "...Shepard, will you?" Shepard nodded, understanding.

"She'd not going to hurt me," Shepard told James, grabbing a couple of energy bars from where she'd tossed them on the bookcase and moving to sit across from Liara again.

"It's...this is going to confuse you. I'm sorry," Liara said, and then, more for Vega's sake than her lovers, so he wouldn't pull a gun again, she muttered, "Embrace Eternity."

_Reapers, fierce, terrible, Thessia burning. Earth, London, the walls crashing down. The Reaper landing before her. Watching Shepard go down. She's pulled out of the way. Three hundred years. Friends die, humans no longer care, no longer understand. A girl. A child asari. Always. Brown eyes, bright, cheerful, laughing. _

_ Reapers, fierce, terrible, Thessia burning. The crucible, powerful, finished. Lights in the sky. Vapor trails, lines of fire. "Your daddy loves you so much, baby girl." Upturned noses, shaken heads. An Alliance uniform, not Shepard's, hers. _

_ Reapers, fierce, terrible, Thessia burning. The citadel explodes. Reapers fall to the ground, dead. Cheering, crying. No answer. Tears; never hearing her voice again. Pain; total, complete. Unbearable. It's called Shepard's Day. They throw parties the first hundred years, then it's mostly forgotten. Another day off work. _

_ A girl, now a woman. Brown eyes contrast against blue skin. A smile. A closed door. A flash of light. Pain. Always pain._

The images flashed in Shepard's mind. The sensation was similar to when Liara took the images from the Eden Prime beacon, but not quite. There's a sense of history to them, but the images she saw were clearly from the future. The girl with her eyes, Liara aging in such subtle ways, all of it. None of it has happened. All of it has happened. It all will happen. And then someone else she doesn't know. Certainly not her child – dear Lord in Heaven that had been her daughter – four eyes and a wide head. A Prothean. She'd seen them in her dreams enough. And the connection is cut. Liara swooned, bending forward over her knees. Shepard handed her the energy bar and she accepts it without comment.

Shepard didn't know what to say. How to explain what she saw. The truth was impossible to deny, she knew Liara's mind as well as she knew her own. The images were as true as Shepard's memories of her own childhood. Colored by events, but true, honest. Brutal. Of everything she saw though, the destruction and the pain and the horror, one thing stood out to her.

"We have a daughter?" she asked when Liara got some of her color back a minute later. James was staring, and he jumped slightly when Shepard spoke, as much from the sound of her voice as from her words.

Liara thought hard on how to answer with Vega in the room. Don't tell anyone, Illira had said, and if she was going to mess with the fabric of time, the fewer people who knew about it the better. "Yes," she finally said, unsure how Shepard would take it. If she would understand that the child does not yet exist.

"When? How?" but most importantly, "Why?"

"I'll tell you everything, as soon as I can. But there's something else. Javik left this. Illira wanted you to use it." She reached for the album, and James went for his gun again. Shepard glared at him, and though he didn't remove it from the holster, he stood ready for anything.

Liara pulled the metal shard from its bag in the back of the book, ignoring Shepard's confused, "Who?" though wondering if it was their daughter's name, or Javik's, that prompted it. She ran her fingers over it, biting her bottom lip. She'd tried to use it while on Mars. She couldn't access it. She just hoped Shepard could. She started to hand it over when James interrupted.

"Uh-huh. Enough of this weird kinky shit, guys. Sorry. Black eyes and kids and who the hell knows what else, and nobody is touching _that_." He reached out to take the shard, but Liara pulled it away at the last second.

"I'm sorry, Dr. T'Soni but-"

"I am so sick of this!" The asari growled, shocking both Shepard and the Lieutenant. She hadn't come here for this. It was supposed to be easy. Walk in alone, walk out with Shepard. She was the fucking Shadow Broker (again), but everything had gone wrong from the moment she'd walked into this building and none of her power could help her now. "You are a Council Spectre Shepard! I know you felt the need to do this, that your conscience would not be satisfied. You've been tried. They're taken the Normandy – which they had no right to do! I am done! Take it. Take it and let's just get out of here." She held the shard out to Shepard, eyes daring James to take it from her.

At the word 'Spectre' Vega had taken a step back. It was easy to forget that. That if she wanted to, Shepard could just get up one day, say she was on 'Spectre business' and walk out the front door. And if they stopped her, she could kill them all and no one would lift a finger. Well, maybe if she killed everyone the Council would step in. Maybe. That wasn't really Shepard's style, though, at least he hoped it wasn't Shepard's style, but it could happen. And it looked like Dr. T'Soni was going to try and make it happen sooner rather than later.

"Spectre business is Spectre business," he said, holding up his hands and taking a step backward.

"You're always getting me in trouble, T'Soni," Shepard muttered, but didn't argue. As she took the shard, her fingers brushed the asari's.

Vega watched closely, ready to grab the whatever it was from Shepard and tackle the asari. He'd probably end up the worst in that fight, but he had a job to do. He might not want to get on the bad side of a Council Spectre, even an incarcerated one, but that didn't mean he was going to let anything happen to Commander Shepard.

As their fingers touched, Shepard went still, eyes moving wildly in her head, but the rest of her stiff and unyielding. Liara sank to her knees, apparently unable to drag her hand away from the shard. Seconds passed, a minute.

_The Protheans rise._

_ Their empire stretches. Towers climb and fall._

_ Battles won._

_ Battles lost._

_ Javik, confronted by Liara. She's screaming, crying, begging. He appeases, when Shepard intervenes. Lies, but a subtle lie. Hidden in mostly truth. It calms her. She leaves. _

_ A glowing child, standing over her burnt, broken body._

_ "So, close, Commander Shepard. But you missed a step." The voice of a child, but dark and cruel. "You are going to die. Perhaps I should let you think you won. But no, dying knowing you failed will be so much sweeter. You see, all of this," he waves his pudgy child-like hand at the Citadel as it burns around them, "could have been avoided. You could have saved the Relays. You could have stopped us returning. But we will be back. Not tomorrow. Maybe not for a hundred years. Or a thousand. Or ten thousand. But we will be back. The others wait in dark space. And because you failed, the power of the crucible will fade. The Reapers here will wake, the ones in dark space will come. And you will die. Every. Last. One of you. And it would have been so simple. A number. Just key it in before the crucible docks, and you would have gotten your happy ending. Your golden ending."_

_ There's a shift; Shepard, dirt, rubble. There's blood everywhere, her body is burnt. Her voice cracks as she speaks._

_ "I don't know if it works like this but I have to try. If you are watching this, I died. I failed. It's a false peace. I will try to hang on, I want to see you again, Liara. I'm sorry I broke my promise. Tell her. Tell her I'll see her again." She grimaces, clutching her side. "If you find the tower, if it shows up, you can still fix this. You can fix it after the fact. phi, on the tower. Remember that, phi on the tower." She coughs up blood, and the scene changes again. _

_ Illira looks nervous. Her eyes dart. _

_ "Dad, I hope this is you watching this. I don't even know where to start. I don't know what to say. A story, I guess, about why all of this is happening. It starts, no, yes. It starts last year when Nillye was sent to the arctic to collect some of the Reaper parts that hadn't burned up entirely on reentering atmo. It's what she does. Really does; mom thinks she's an accountant. That travels. Moms kinda gullible. It crashed into the ice cap, and Nillye found a box buried in the ice. It was carved, but no one could recognize it. She brought it back home, under the pretense of letting mom see it. Prothean expert and all. But I could read it. I read it." She smiles wistfully. "Mom must of mapped the Cipher when...no, not going to think about that. Ew. But I could read it._

_ "It was from a race of people that predated the Protheans by at least a cycle, though the outer stone box was Prothean. It was a way to travel in time. To bend the universe and go back to where you started. The math was easy enough, simple, almost too simple, really, and we got it working. I think we got it working. Goddess, I may be planning on killing my mother, Nillye. If this doesn't work..."_

_ "Shush, love, and talk to your father," came a soft voice from behind the woman. A flash of indigo skin as she passes through Illira's memory._

_ "Anyway, we decided to send mom back. She would be able to get to you. To show you this. And get you to the Citadel. I don't know what the tower is, but if Mom's stories are right its where you met the Council. So, there you go. Maybe I'll go downstairs after all this and find my mom dead, I hope not. I hope you're watching this, and give mom a kiss for me. I love you, Dad. Remember the tower, Dad. Just get there."_

Shepard gasped as the shard fell from her hand. Liara was crying, sobbing. As the connection between them broke she hugged herself, her body shaking as she cried. The sight of Shepard, broken , burned and bleeding. They'd never let her see the body. Now she knew why. And her baby girl. She cried for the loss of her, for never telling her the truth. It was such as little thing, letting her daughter live under the pretense she believed the lie they told. She wished now she'd told them she had known the truth; had not just played along. It was such a little thing, but it weighed on her now.

Shepard just stared at the shard that lay on the carpet. She glanced up at Vega, standing, one hand outstretched, a look of worry on his face.

"Have you, have you contacted Hackett?" Shepard finally asked.

Liara looked at James and shook her head. "Not here." She hiccuped, trying to stop the tears.

"I can't leave, Liara. You know that. That was...I don't know what that was, but it doesn't change the fact that I killed three hundred thousand people. And I did it without batting an eye."

"Don't let their lives be wasted then!"

"I'm not. But, I don't know what to make of that, I can't even think about what it means. I trust you Liara, but all of that is a little much. I need time."

"And that's the one thing we don't have. I thought we did, I thought I could let things go as they had, but I can't. There is too much that needs to be done," Liara responded through her tears.

"If I could interrupt?" Vega asked, tentatively.

Shepard shrugged, caught between the awe at seeing a grown daughter not yet conceived, watching her own death, and wondering who the hell that glowing kid was. Liara nodded, tears still streaming, now silently, from her eyes.

"Well, I dunno what just happened, it looked like some seriously freaky crap though. And, well, I don't do freaky. I believe you about the Reapers, I mean, you've never had reason to lie. And if I'm follow, which I'm not sure I am, what the hell is that thing? If I follow then it's proof of the Reapers. So just show it to the committee. Right? Then you stay here, and they take care of, whatever it is Dr. T'Soni wants you to take care of. Ma'am."

"It doesn't work like that," Liara said, and Shepard agreed. While the information would be useful, and it would be nice if doing what Vega suggested would work, but time travel? Glowing kids and echoing voices? It was all rather unbelievable. More unbelievable than a race of sentient machines coming to wipe all organic life from the galaxy.

Shepard hugged Liara close to her, pulling her up onto the bed again, feeling her tears seep into her shirt. She couldn't imagine what it must be like for her. To have lived an entire lifetime, and then be brought back here. Into the middle of a war. A war they had already lost. She couldn't leave though. She had said she would accept punishment for what she had done; for letting the ends justify the means for the first time in her life. And yet the images Liara had shown her, of Earth in rubble, of Palaven on fire, of Thessia in ruins, if all of that could be prevented she had a duty to try. A duty she couldn't fulfill here.

"There's no way you could give us a minute, is there?" she asked Vega, her hand rubbing comforting circles on Liara's back.

"I can't, ma'am, I'm sorry." Not that he would let Liara out of his sight, even if he could, now. She apparently had an angry streak and he was not going to let it interfere with the job he had to do. Which was keep Shepard locked up, and safe. And if they wanted to tie him up then he'd just have to learn to live with it. He tried not to think of them tying him up though; his mind was still a bit too raw from earlier.

Shepard looked at him, debating just telling him to get the hell out of the room, but she couldn't bring herself to do it. She liked Vega, for all that he was a shameless flirt and had drawn a gun on her bondmate.

Liara had stopped crying, and she was just laying against the Commander's chest now, her arms hanging limply at her sides. It had been four weeks since she'd woken up on the shuttle on the escape from the Shadow Broker base. In those four weeks Liara had gone through all the stages of grief, yet she had not once cried since she had been aboard the shuttle. Her depression had manifested itself in lethargy; she had spent two days just lying on her bunk on Mars, not moving, hardly thinking. Her anger had simmered, and had forced more than one of her fellow scientists into therapy. But she had not cried. She felt a bit like she'd been doing nothing but since she walked into this room; since she had seen Shepard with that cocky, idiotic grin on her face. That face that had haunted her dreams for over three hundred years. As the tears dried up now, she felt like a weight that had hung over her this past month was finally gone. Dream or not, she'd play her part. And she'd get her daughter back.

She pushed herself out of Shepard's hug and took a deep, slow breath. "It's okay, Shepard. I understand. You know how to get a hold of me if you change your mind." She squared her shoulders, grabbed the shard from the floor and the album from the bed. Her heart felt just a little too big for her chest as she moved to leave.

"Liara, wait," Shepard pleaded.

She stoped at the door, which had never been closed, and turned to look at the commander again. She had stood up, and Liara knew that look on her face. It's a distant memory now, one that she'd hoped never to see again. It's the same look that the crossed Shepard's face the first time they'd seen each other on Illium. Shepard has kissed her, fleeting, feather-light, and she'd pulled away. And had caught that look out of the corner of her eye. The hurt in that look tore at her soul. That day she had ignored it, pretended it had never happened.

She was sorely tempted to do the same again. That time, weeks had past for Shepard while two years of mourning, of trying to move on, had tormented Liara. This time, Shepard couldn't remember the hundreds of years that had passed - and yet hadn't. Didn't know that Liara had moved on, in her own way. That she had left the tri-folded Alliance flag in it's shadowbox above the mantel of every place she'd ever lived. That Shepard's enlistment holo had been sitting on the side table when she'd rushed from her apartment to catch the shuttle to Florida. That she had put her life into her work and her daughter and had given her life to the Alliance as surely as Shepard had. Shepard had no idea how hard everything had been for her, the un-shed tears that had encased her soul. But she wouldn't, couldn't ignore it again. Not when she'd dreamed of this reunion, knowing full well it would never happen.

She took a half step back toward the Commander, fighting down the memories of losing her. "What is it Shepard?" She kept all the pain, all the years, out of her voice, but it made her sound caustic. She saw Shepard flinch and regretted it.

"It's not that simple, Liara. I would walk out that door with you if I knew I could accomplish anything on the other side. I can't. Spectre or not, the Alliance has the Normandy, my crew is gone, and the council doesn't listen to me on a good day. Just don't leave like this."

"You accomplish so much," Liara whispered.

Shepard just shook her head, walking over to her bondmate. She pulled her into a hug, kissed her on the forehead, and nodded. "First floor, hallway just to your left when you get off the elevator. Third door on the right. They'll be able to get you in touch with the fifth."

Shepard's eyes sparkled, and she kissed Liara again, softly, across the lips. Liara nodded, then left, her fingers brushing against her lips as she walked down the hall.

"Confused much, James?" Shepard asked, once Liara was out of sight. The Lieutenant looked a bit like his brain was about to fry, and if she hadn't been so worried about Liara Shepard probably would have found it funny.

"You could say that, ma'am. What exactly just happened?"

"I think my bondmate just came back from the future," Shepard said with an almost desperate laugh.

"Make all the jokes you want, Commander. That was just, I don't know what that was."

Shepard didn't answer, but walked to the window. She looked out at the expanse of buildings, thinking of what she'd seen in Liara's memories. The advantage, she supposed, to being so intimately familiar with another's mind was that you never doubted them. James may think she was joking, but the truth of Liara's memories was clear to Shepard. Clearer even than many of her own.

The Reapers had invaded. Were going to invade.

In Liara's memories things had not gone well. Shepard had caught only glimpses, she'd seen only the big picture in Liara's memory, but it was clear they had been racing to catch up the entire time. This time, they had an advantage. If Hackett would listen. She hoped Hackett would listen.

Shepard had been right, and as always her directions were flawless. The tiny office tucked away down a deserted corridor had held a comm station, a tiny metal desk, and one haggard looking young man in civilian clothes. She'd worked as a contractor for the Alliance for over fifty years before some young, recently promoted admiral, had offered her an honorary position as an officer. She'd rejected it, until the media had thrown a fit. Rather than drag herself and her daughter (who had yet to move out of the house) through the media shit storm, she'd quietly acquiesced. Despite the dress blues hanging in her closet, she knew the face of a military contractor all too well.

She smiled at the man, and offered her hand, "Hi, I was told you would be able to get me into contact with Admiral Hackett."

He smiled at her and shook the offered hand, looking relieved. She knew the feeling – any interruption to drag your eyes away from yet another report, another redacted document. It probably didn't hurt that she was an asari, either. After the relays had been destroyed Earth had held a cross section of every galactic military. Now, though, she was fairly certain she was the only asari in this hemisphere, if not on the entire planet. Ignoring the way he looked at her, a trait she'd been taught as a child, she smiled warmly, and waited.

"Of course, ma'am. And who should I say is contacting him?"

"Dr. Liara T'Soni. I just returned from the Mars Archives."

"Of course, Dr. T'Soni."

She didn't listen as he contacted the fleet and spoke with the comm officer on Hackett's ship. Her eyes roamed the room, looking for exits and places of cover in case of an attack. She caught herself doing it, and it brought a sad smile to her lips. It had been a very long time since she'd had to worry about anything more than making it to the supermarket before it closed.

"Admiral Hackett is on the line, ma'am."

She moved over to the full body scanner, and smiled at the Admiral. He didn't return it.

"Dr. T'Soni. Back from the Archives already. I hope its good news."

"Yes, sir. With my resources it was fairly easy to disseminate the information in the Archives," she lied, "and I discovered blue prints for a weapon." She went over the schematics, just as she had the first time she'd found them. She was a little more detailed – Illira had studied them extensively along with some of the notes from the scientists who had worked on the project and included her findings in the memory chip – in how she explained it, and when he didn't speak immediately her first thought was that she had taken it too far.

"That's quite amazing, Dr. T'Soni. And in less than a month. What did Shepard have to say about all this?"

"I believe she is behind the idea, Admiral," she said. Fixing the problems with the weapon had taken focus , and Shepard had just accepted the weapon as fact from her own memories. Liara hadn't even considered that Hackett would know she'd spoken to Shepard before contacting him. Shepard hadn't doubted its effectiveness, hadn't questioned how or if it would work, "and it's the only plan we have. Isn't it worth giving it a chance?"

"Absolutely, doctor. Send over the schematics and I'll have one of the science teams here start looking into it. I'll be in touch as soon as we start to move forward. Hackett out."

She stood, staring dumbly at the empty space in front of her. She had never doubted that Hackett would immediately start building the crucible, and it surprised her that he hadn't jumped on the idea. Now that she thought about it though, there had been a desperation the last time that didn't exist now. Today was no different than a few months ago. The Reapers weren't here yet, and most people still doubted that they would arrive. Leaving the archives early had achieved nothing. Coming to see Shepard had achieved nothing.

Well, not nothing. It had been good to see her. To feel her. Taste her.

Liara shook her head, clearing her thoughts. She had work to do.

The sun had barely been up when she'd left her motel room to come visit Shepard, and it was just past its zenith when she left. She checked the time, just after 1300 locally, and headed for the nearest cafe to grab something to eat.

Sitting under the umbrella of some human coffee shop half an hour later, she contacted Feron.

"Dr. T'Soni, how did it go?" he asked.

"Not as well as I had hoped. The Alliance has the plans now, though. All we can do it wait. How's the ship?" She hadn't been honest with him either. Lying had become second nature to her, and it was a bit depressing. He had bought the line that she had found in one month what Alliance scientists hadn't been able to find in thirty years as easily as Hackett had.

"It's doing okay, though it's a bit cramped at the moment. Do you know how long you'll be staying on the planet? I could head to the Citadel and see about getting something a little more roomy."

"That should be fine. I don't know how long I'm going to be, but if you aren't back I can catch a ride going that way. They leave daily. Take care of Glyph for me."

"Who?" he asked, large black eyes knitting together in confusion. She'd forgotten that Glyph hadn't received that name yet, that she hadn't given it to him until she'd been on Mars for over two months.

"The info drone."

Feron laughed, "Of course, Liara. I'll be leaving Mars tomorrow then. I will contact you when I reach the Citadel."

She signed off and leaned back, picking up her coffee cup. She'd never had a taste for the stuff until Illira had started drinking it around the time she'd turned thirty. Asari in the middle of puberty are hard enough to handle when they aren't jumped up on caffeine, and Liara had taken to drinking twice as much as her daughter just to keep up. Now, though she had cut back significantly, she found the rich taste of a dark roast one of the few ways she could relax.

She watched the people walk by her, going about their business. The fountain across from her had had a statue – would have a statue – of Shepard and Anderson. It was built about twelve years after the war, and had depicted Shepard and Anderson, both at parade rest, standing back to back, the symbol of the Alliance cast in copper between them. Liara had always hated it, and finally seeing the fountain it had replaced, she disliked it all the more. Lunch finished, she paid – it had taken her awhile to remember how to use the credit chit when she'd booked passage from Mars. Paper money had come back into fashion on Earth after the war, and though e-banking had slowly made a come back, she'd continued to use the physical currency. The amount of money in her account had been a surprise too. She'd forgotten that for awhile there just before and during the war, she had been a rich woman. Working paycheck to paycheck the first years after Illira was born had made her forget.

It was easy now, though, to pay and leave, tucking the chit back into her pocket. Her next step would be to see the Normandy. Shepard needed the ship if she was going to leave, and Liara needed Shepard to stop the Reapers – again. How to get to the ship was another problem all together, though. She knew it was in dry dock; Joker had embellished the story about how he, EDI, Vega and Williams had commandeered the vessel when the Reapers had taken Earth, but no matter how the story changed, one thing always stayed the same. He, and the ship, were under heavy guard while they retrofitted the Cerberus machine.

But she had contacts. She had a network of spies, informants and assassins that crossed the galaxy.

She pulled up her Omni-tool and slipped into a dark corner between two buildings.

"Kim, this is the Shadow Broker," she said, the voice synthesizer doing its job, "I need you to find a way onto the Alliance Beurling Docks in Vancouver for one of my contacts. A Doctor Liara T'Soni will be contacting you tomorrow."


	3. Chapter 3

Shepard paced her room, a million different thoughts racing through her head. Liara hadn't come back the day before. It had hurt, but hadn't been unexpected. Their brief reunion had not gone how Shepard had expected. When she'd thought about it over the last two months there had been a lot more sex and a lot less crying. Of course, when she'd thought about it over the last two months it hadn't involved her lover having lived multiple human lifetimes without her.

Her brain didn't want to accept what she had seen in the meld. That she knew it to be true and that logically it couldn't be contrasted sharply in her head. Shepard had always had a fascination with physics. The accident aboard ship when she was fourteen killed what few dreams she'd had of leaving the military and becoming a professor someday, but it hadn't killed off her passion for the physical world. What she had studied told her that what had happened to Liara was impossible. A consciousness could not travel back in time, less so than the body could. She considered, perhaps, that it was the asari physiology that allowed Liara's mind to do what the body could not, but she couldn't see how it could be done.

Knowing that it was true, and that it could not be true at the same time had caused Shepard a restless nights sleep. She couldn't even imagine what Liara must be going through. She wished she could have gone with her, could have joined her outside the Alliance detention center, and run off into the vast expanse of space to save the galaxy. Again. She hadn't been able to, though. Though her prison was fancy, and she was more or less free to do what she wanted as long as she brought her guard along, she wasn't free. They hadn't court martialed her, hadn't thrown her in the brig, and they made every effort to make sure she was comfortable, but no one let her forget that she was not a free woman.

The door to her cell opened, and she half turned. Vega had the day off, and her other guards weren't nearly as concerned about walking in on her naked. The fizzle of hope she'd had that Liara had come to visit again died away as her guard walked in the door. He didn't speak, just cocked his head towards the door. She followed him silently, wondering what the hell they wanted her for now.

When she'd turned herself in seven weeks ago, she had expected to spend quite a few years in a ten by ten cell. Instead, they had given her a room in the detention center that was nicer than any room she'd stayed in at a space port, and had given her the most ludicrous trial she'd ever had the misfortune of sitting through. After sentencing the day before, she'd hoped to not have to see her judges anytime soon. Or ever, for that matter. What they could want now she couldn't fathom.

They had her ship – at the time it had seemed like a good idea to let them look at it. They had her crew, those that hadn't taken her warning and jumped ship before she handed everything over, anyway. They had her freedom. She had given it all to them, and now she regretted it. Not that she'd paid the price for blowing up the relay, but that she had allowed them to walk all over her because she felt guilty. She had done what needed to be done to save the rest of the galaxy, and yes, killing those people had been horrible, but Liara needed her help now, and because she had handed herself over to the idiots in charge she was trapped here.

She'd thought long and hard the night before about what Liara had said. She supposed she could have told them that what she had done had been as a Spectre. It would have been a lie. It would probably have had her stripped of her Spectre status, but she wouldn't be walking down this hall right now. She'd probably be on the Shadow Broker base making Liara breakfast. A much better use of her time. It wasn't outrageous that she try that stunt now, but she couldn't make herself do it. Being the first human Spectre was an honor, a privilege and a responsibility she didn't take for granted. She would not use it as a get out of jail free card, no matter how many times she'd horded them playing Monopoly the Galactic Edition with her mother's crew as a child.

She smiled at the guard when he opened the door for her, but he just scowled at her. Some people just took their jobs way too seriously. Like running off through uncharted relays to kill aliens. Twice. She let her smile widen, and turned it to the panel in front of her.

"Admirals," she said, a little shocked at seeing who was sitting in the chairs in front of her. Not her tribunal, but four Navy Admirals. She didn't know them to look at, but she saluted the stars on their shoulders. They didn't return it, but the only woman in front of her nodded.

"Please, take a seat, Ms. Shepard," she said.

Shepard did what she was asked, sitting down in the same chair she'd been in yesterday. She waited silently, wondering if the Alliance had changed its mind about her 'house arrest'.

"Ms. Shepard, it has come to our attention that you had a visitor yesterday," the youngest of the admirals, a man in his mid to late forties stated.

It wasn't a question, and she didn't answer.

"We also understand," the woman said, "that it was Dr. Liara T'Soni. And that after leaving your rooms she went and spoke with Admiral Hackett. Is this correct?"

Shepard wondered where this was going, "She came to visit me, but I don't know where she went afterward."

"Why did she visit you?" the man to the left of the woman, a beady-eyed, pudgy man with a receding hairline, asked.

The reply that first popped into her head was crude, and mostly inaccurate, and it took all her willpower not to simply say, 'She probably came by to fuck me, but Vega wouldn't leave.' Instead, she went for something a bit more subtle.

"Dr. T'Soni came by to see how I was. As an original member of my crew on the first Normandy, Liara became a close friend. She was also instrumental in my not being, well, dead."

"As we understand it," the young admiral said, "the two of you are more than simply friends."

Again, there had been no question. And again, she didn't answer the unspoken one.

"Ms. Shepard, please don't make this harder on yourself. We are simply trying to determine why a woman such as Dr. T'Soni would come to speak with you, and would then contact an Admiral of the Alliance. Now, are you or are you not, in a relationship with Dr. T'Soni?"

There was something more to this. This wasn't about who she was or wasn't sleeping with – it wasn't exactly a state secret. Her mother knew for Christ's sake. This wasn't about information getting back to Cerberus, or being leaked to the Asari High Command, either. Vega could vouch for what had happened. Shepard didn't know exactly what they were after, but she sure as hell wasn't going to give it to them if she could help it.

"I am."

"See, that wasn't so hard. And why did you send her to speak with Admiral Hackett?"

"I didn't."

The beady-eyed Admiral stared at her, and he clicked his tongue against the roof of his mouth. She hated that sound. There had been a man in basic with her who had done that, and it had only been through great self control, and an already tense relationship with Ellison, that she hadn't torn his tongue out of his mouth. Her control was wearing thin today. "We know she spoke with him. We just want to know why."

"She came by to see me. As I understand it, she was only allowed a supervised visit. That made it fairly short. I haven't seen her since."

The eldest person in front of her, the only one who hadn't spoke yet, stood up. He slammed his hands down on the table, stooping slightly to look her in the eyes. "We know about the weapon," he said.

"Weapon?" Shepard asked. So that was what this was about. Something in Liara's communication with Hackett must have been flagged. Shepard relaxed.

"Yes. What are you planning?"

"I am not planning anything, sir. Liara told me she had just come from the Mar Archives, and she did mention she had found plans there for a weapon. One that could destroy the Reapers. That must be what she was speaking to Admiral Hackett about. It's about time we came together and started trying to stop them."

"We see no evidence of any Reapers. That was your justification for the crimes that brought you here in the first place. Why don't you just stop with the fairy tales, it will make your life easier."

"The Reapers are not fairy tales," Shepard said, an edge to her voice, "nor will ignoring them make them go away. I don't know what Liara found, and I don't know why you called me in here, but I do know that they are coming. And when they do, we have to be ready or Earth will burn."

"Is that a threat, Ms. Shepard?" The youngest Admiral asked.

"No, sir. Just a statement of fact. Rather than try and get information from me that you already know, why not just ask Hackett what he spoke to her about?"

"We have spoken to him."

"So this was all just a game to see how much I'd tell you? I don't know anything!"

They all glared at her for a few very long minutes, and then the woman said, "That will be all," stood up and the four of them filed out of the room.

Even more confused than when she walked in, Shepard left. Her guard wasn't there. Vega wasn't there. The hallway was deserted. She glanced behind her, wondering what they would say if she just walked out the front door. She was sorely tempted, and was just about to head that direction when her guard came around the corner. He didn't say anything, and she followed him silently back to her room.

* * *

Kimberly Lakota watched the asari from the shadows of the cargo crates. The blue woman was talking with one of the people working on the Normandy project. The two woman were speaking softly, too softly for Kim to hear over the noise of the ships retrofit. The human shook the asari's hand then turned and headed for the security gate where she was allowed past with just a wave of the hand. As soon as the woman was out of sight, the asari turned her eyes toward where Kim was hiding. She moved with what people called the grace of the battlefield, though in the years Kim had worked for the Alliance she had never really seen any grace in battle. There was usually just a lot of screaming, bleeding and running.

Grace was reserved for duels, and for making love. While Kim had no interest in asari, she wouldn't have minded going hand to hand with her. If she kept her biotics out of it. Kim didn't have any biotic talent at all, and had always felt the asari as a race had an unfair advantage in close combat. This particular asari's ability to spot her in the shadows was quite a skill as well. Kim had always prided herself on being able to blend in and be unnoticeable.

"Captain Lakota?" the asari asked, though Kim noted the subtle shift in her tone. No matter the question, the asari knew the answer.

"It depends on who is asking."

"Dr. Liara T'Soni. I was told you had a way for me to get inside there."

"I might. Why'd the broker want you in there anyway? It would be easier for me to get in and get whatever he wants."

"I know what I'm looking for," T'Soni answered, "and it would take too long to explain it to you." There was a note of finality to her voice, and Kim had worked for the Shadow Broker long enough to know better than to press. Whoever this was, she must be fairly high up in the broker's hierarchy.

They began walking, passing through the open areas of the dock. Kim saw people watching them, and did her best to make sure they were seen walking away from the ship. She'd gotten the doctor in legitamately, but she'd never been one to take chances. It wasn't difficult, aliens weren't unheard of on the Alliance base, but they weren't common either.

"I got you in, full access. Anyone asks, just hand them these." She handed a folio to Liara, and a plastic name badge. The asari took them, clipping the badge to her coat.

She waved at the guard at the far end of the base, waiting until he was looking the other way before opening the car and letting her companion climb in. She followed the same route they'd taken. The people who had watched them walk by glanced at the car, but with the darkened windows couldn't see who was inside.

She dropped Liara off just past the guards at the main gate, then pulled around the corner. The asari got out, and didn't even look at her as she walked away. Very high up on the broker's heirarchy, and she knew it. Kim wondered in the former Commander Shepard knew that her friend worked for the Shadow Broker. Considering Shepards past with the man, it seemed unlikely. T'Soni obviously had no idea that Kim knew who she was, or Shepard. Or perhaps she did had didn't care. She was very high up.

Kim shook her head as she watched the asari round the corner. She supposed it didn't really matter. She just wanted to be very far away if the broker's agent and Shepard decided to steal the ship. The Shadow Broker wouldn't be happy if she blew her cover. Not happy at all.

Liara pushed her nervousness down, stilled her face and marched up to the Normandy's hatch. Dozens of people were moving around the ship. It was in the process of being repainted, and someone was hanging from a safety wire over the barrel of the ship's main gun. She spotted faces she knew, men and women who had been working on the ship when the Reapers attacked and hadn't left. Some she didn't; the ship had been further along in the retrofit when she'd joined the crew, and many of the people here now had finished their jobs by the time Shepard had picked her up at the Archives.

She caught a glimpse of Adams moving toward the ship and ducked behind a crate as he passed. The last thing she wanted was for someone who knew her to see her now. Once he was on board, Liara moved away from where she was pretending to be interested in a box of electrical wires, and headed for the same door he'd entered through. The guards glanced at her badge, and she got ready to show the paperwork in the folio, but they waved her by.

Her breath caught as she stepped into the CIC. The place looked like a tornado had passed through it. People were everywhere, panels lay open, wires yanked from their home to be cleaned up and brought up to Alliance code. She spotted Traynor, who she had seen coming in, working in the corner. The specialist hadn't recognzed her of course, but they'd spoken briefly about nothing in particular. As much as Liara didn't like the way Traynor had undressed Shepard with her eyes whenever they were in the same room, she had a gruding respect for her. And the woman was unfortunately very good at her job. There was a crash, and Liara turned to watch a team pull tables and lockers from what had been the armory and drag them to the elevator.

"Hello, Dr. T'Soni, please come to the bridge." came a familiar voice.

"EDI!" she grinned, moving quickly around the corner. Two heavily armed guards stood on either side of the door to the bridge. They blocked her path, glaring down at her.

"I'm sorry ma'am. The bridge is off limits to scientific personnel at the moment."

"Oi, you lumbering jarheads! Let her in, does she look like one of your damn scientists? She's my damn doctor," came Joker's voice from inside. The guards looked at her, and she just shrugged, wondering why Joker would lie about that. The lie worked though, and they let her pass.

"Liara! How's my favorite asari?" Joker asked.

"I am doing okay." She glanced toward the guards, but the door had closed behind her. "Why the dissemination of disinformation, Joker?"

He chuckled, "Because EDI and I are lonely. And don't use such big words."

"What Jeff means to say, Dr. T'Soni, is that while the guards are very trusting, it would be best if they didn't know who you were. Playing the role of Joker's physician seemed the easiest way to have them leave you alone."

"That's what I said," Joker chimed in. "Anyway, what brings you to this little corner of hell?"

"I need the ship," she stated plainly, "And I was hoping EDI would know how long it would be until the ship was space worthy."

"I could have the ship ready in about two days, Dr. T'Soni, assuming someone repaired the bulkhead on the starboard side on the crew deck. I have been keeping up the falsity that I am a VI, so I am unable to ask any of the current repair crews to do it in a timely fashion. But what do you need me for?"

Liara nodded. Two days was better than she'd expected, if not as nice as she'd hoped. It would give her time to try and convince Shepard that leaving was the right thing to do, though.

"What do you need done?" she asked, ignoring EDIs question.

* * *

Liara had spent the next two hours aboard the Normandy, amazed at how far off Joker's stories really had been. He was under guard, certainly, but no one cared much about who went where on the rest of the ship. When she'd finally left, it had been easy enough to have Kim file some extra paperwork to speed along the process of hull recovery, specifically the crew deck. She'd then bribed a handful of Alliance politicians into diverting funds to the Normandy project. With any luck the ship would be ready to fly in less than sixty hours.

On the plus side as well, though Anderson seemed to have plans for the ship, Liara was certain she'd be able to get it out of dry dock without actually having to steal it. She'd really missed having the broker's network at her disposal.

She was just debating going back to see Shepard when a familiar face stepped out of the crowd. She attempted to make herself invisible, but the young woman spotted her.

"Liara?" Ashley asked, approaching her. "Is that really you?"

"Who else would I be?"

Williams smiled, a little coldly, and shrugged. "Someone else. What are you doing here?"

Liara was just glad that she'd run into the Lieutenant Commander a good ways from the Normandy docks. She had grown to like the woman, but it had taken a long time, and more than one bottle of expensive liquor before Williams had liked her back. Liara had become quite good at buying friendships after becoming the Shadow Broker.

"I heard that Shepard was here, I came to see her."

"Oh, right. You two still knocking boots?" Liara glared even as she blushed. Why did everyone seem to think that what was between her and the Commander was just sex? And why did Ashley have to make sound so crass. Somethimes Liara thought she should have introducted Ashley to her father. "I'll take that as a yes," Ashley laughed.

"Have you gone to see her?" Liara asked as they began walking down the street together, already knowing the answer.

"No. She worked for Cerberus. You were there, you saw what they did to people. I just don't know how she could do something like that. I don't know that she's still the Commander."

"She is," Liara said with solemn finality.

"I guess you'd know better than most, eh? I'm just not sure if knowing that makes it worse. That she'd willingly go over to them. After everything we saw them do."

"They brought her back. And they were the only ones that were willing to listen about the Collectors. I don't condone their actions, but I'm fairly certain Shepard was just using them to meet her own ends. The Illusive Man wa- isn't too happy with her, from what I gather."

Ashley looked at her, her eyes boring down on her. Taking stock. The difference in this reunion was staggering, really. Her fall from the scared archeologist she'd been much more subtle when she wasn't shooting Cerberus troops between the eyes.

"I guess you're right. We'll see," Williams finally said.

"We will. You should come up with me to see her, Lieutenant."

Ashley smiled, "You noticed," she said, puffing out her chest. "But no, too many old wounds."

"Exult O shores, and ring O bells!/But I with mournful tread,/Walk the deck my Captain lies,/Fallen cold and dead?"

"Whitman, really? Hardly fitting." Williams asked with a smile, "How do you even know that?"

The truth was Illira had memorized it in grade school in memory of her father, and had spent almost three years wandering the house reciting it until Liara knew it as well as her daughter did and had told the girl to go memorize something else (the result being Liara could also recite The Highwayman). She answered, "Around."

"Shepard's not dead."

"Do you really want to wait until the Reapers show up to make your peace, Lieutenant Commander Williams? When they do, it might be too late. I know she'd like to see you."

"Damn you and your asari mind tricks, Liara." Williams growled.

"I was just making conversation," she said with a grin.

"Fine. I'll go see her tomorrow, but you better be there!"Ashley replied, moving away.

"I wouldn't miss this for the world," Liara said under her breath, waving goodbye.

Liara threw herself on the bed of her motel room forty minutes later, wishing more than anything that she would just wake up. She didn't want to do all this again. The months without Shepard had been hell, coming so close on the heels of her being dead. Now, Shepard was four blocks away, and just as gone as she'd been when she'd been on a different planet.

The worst part though, was that a part of Liara just didn't care.

She wanted to go back and hug her daughter. Wanted to see her granddaughter be born, and spoil the royal crap out of her. She wanted the life she'd had, the life she'd avoided when she'd had it. Reapers be damned, she thought as she looked at the popcorn ceiling of cheap motel room. It just wasn't her problem anymore. Shepard had died. The crew of the Normandy had disappeared. The turians had died, en masse, until the Quarians had found a way to convert a few of their war ships to produce food enough to feed both peoples. And then the turians had died anyway, because turian women did not serve on the front lines. And there had been a kind of calmness to it all, a kind of reckoning that she hadn't noticed because she'd had a baby and that had been all that mattered.

And she knew now that the peace wouldn't last. Shepard's memory in the shard had been more than enough to convince her that Illira's intentions had not been simply to get her mother laid (the thought had crossed her mind briefly while she'd been on Mars, and had upset her more than she'd ever admit). Things had gone wrong, and Illira had sent her back to fix them. No, to have Shepard fix them.

She considered, momentarily, just going to the Citadel, heading up to the tower and finding out how to fix the thing herself. It wouldn't be terrible difficult, really. Except for the council chambers themselves, the tower was open to the public, as a garden. It would be simple to just walk up there and start plugging numbers into various consoles until something happened. Then she could just sit back, relax, and wait for things to play out or until she woke up.

Hackett had the plan for the Crucible. They only needed to put one number into a terminal on the citadel to fix every damn thing. Instant win.

Only, she had a feeling it wouldn't be that simple.

Nothing was ever that simple.

She threw an arm over her eyes, trying to still her mind. She'd barely slept the night before, hadn't slept well in weeks, but it was so hard to rest. She'd dream of Illira, of the life she'd taken for granted.

It was strange though, that she could think this now. She'd tried to force herself over the years to accept the truth. Asari did not pine over lost lovers. Illira's words a hundred years before rang through her head, "Dad would be dead already, anyway, Mom. Just get over it!"

That had hurt. Physically.

Illira hadn't understood. No one had understood. The physical reactions she would get when Shepard was gone. The way her stomach would turn, and the way she'd feel light headed.

The reasons why she'd been so cold to Shepard when she'd turned up on Illium.

She wouldn't leave. She never wanted to feel that again. If she woke up, wonderful. If not, she was going to stay at Shepard's side until the end.

It was the only place she could be.

History had proven that.

Tomorrow she'd take Ashley up to visit Shepard, and she'd plant the seeds to get the other woman on board when they flew away. It would be difficult, Williams was a career soldier just as much as Shepard. More so, even. Shepard had once confided that as a child she'd had no intention of following in her parents footsteps, while Ashley had known where she'd end up from the time she was small. But in two days, one way or the other, she and Shepard would be on the Normandy. They would fix what history got wrong, and then she'd go back.

She didn't know how she'd get back, but she would. She'd hug her daughter again.

Liara rolled onto her side, staring at the closed curtains of the window. Outside, it was mid afternoon. People were going about their business, and no one knew of the torn nature of her heart.

She stared at the small beans of light that broke through the heavy fabric until she fell asleep.

She dreamed.

_ She dreamed she was back on Earth, and Illira was just a child. Only they weren't alone. Not like they had been. Illira was riding on her grandfather's shoulders, and Aethyta was laughing while she told the girl stories about her Krogran great-grandfather. Ashley and Shepard were standing just down the sidewalk, waving at them. Aethyta and Illira moved toward them, moving away from Liara. Liara tried to catch up, but the more she ran, the farther away they got. And then Benezia was there, as she had been when Liara was growing up. Beautiful, and kind. She was holding a bouquet of yellow daffodils._

_ "You can't have it all," she said._

_ "I don't want it all. I just want my daughter. I want my daughter and my bondmate."_

_ "At what cost? What won't happen if you get them both?" She handed her daughter a flower. "There are choices, Little Wing. To have them both you have to sacrifice the galaxy. You have to choose."_

_ "I can't! I love them both. Why, mother? Why am I sick?" _

_ "You aren't sick, Little Wing. You're gifted."_

_ There was a loud hum, a boom, and the sky was suddenly red. Reapers were descending, and both Illira and Shepard lay on the ground, alone now, dead._

Liara woke with a start. She checked the time, trying to slow her heart. It was late. She'd slept through the afternoon. Her stomach growled as she got up off the bed.

She'd had the dream before. Twice since she'd been back here. It was similar to the ones she'd had after Illira was born. It was a just a dream, but it terrified her. She didn't want to have to make that choice. She didn't want to have to choose between the two most important people that had ever been in her life.

But, she consoled herself, she wouldn't have to. It was just a dream. It had been a stressful month, not helped by the fact that she couldn't even wrap her mind around whether or not anything she saw was actually happening. The dreams were just a manifestation of her fears and her lack of understanding. They meant nothing.

She wanted Shepard there, though, to help tell her it was okay. Wanted to be held, wanted the world to just go away.

It wouldn't. Life didn't work like that. She'd lived long enough to know that just because you wanted something didn't make it true. But wanting was the first step.

And she wanted all of this to end. She wanted it all to just go away and leave her alone.

And she wanted Shepard.

Two days. She just had to make it two days. The thought was strangely comforting.


	4. Chapter 4

Admiral Stephen Hackett was not the sort of man that other people trifled with. He was not the sort to let anyone get away with anything, and he ran a tight ship. He was respectful, and listened to his crew, but they all knew who wore the stars. He was a friendly man when off duty, if a little rough around the edges. He could say with some pride that he had only ever been surprised once in his life. He could never tell anyone why he'd been surprised – a call from T'Soni after attempting to contact the Shadow Broker had made him spit water out his nose, a fact she'd promised to never tell anyone. It hadn't even really surprised him that the Shadow Broker had found the information on the weapon so quickly, she was asari and the most powerful individual in the galaxy. If anything, he'd expected it earlier.

Today, however, there would be no surprises. He wasn't entirely sure that there would be much respect. He hated dealing with the board, the bunch of stuffed toads, but the message that had come in just moments before was not something an Admiral could ignore. He pushed himself through the crowds on his ships. Pushed actually wasn't a good term, he thought with a hint of amusement. The scowl on his face made even the most oblivious of the crew step out of his way as he passed. He climbed the steps up to the comm room and snapped (he regretted it later) at the young woman at the station.

She scurried past him, her salute a little broken as she left the room. He hit the button on the comm and raised an eyebrow as Admiral Amelia Snyder materialized. He nodded respectfully, but didn't let his scowl fall. He had history with Snyder, and he didn't much like her. She toed the line, and got ahead by grace of luck rather than skill. She was not the sort of woman he'd ever thought would make Admiral, but her appointment had not been entirely unexpected. She could pull strings with the best of them. And while he outranked her in the field, she ran more or less everything back on Earth.

"Admiral," he said.

"Stephen, really. This isn't a formal call."

"I was told this was a matter of security. Not a personal call," he replied, trying not to grind his teeth.

"It is a matter of security. But it's not formal. We have some questions regarding Ms. Shepard. I know the board spoke to you about Dr. T'Soni coming to visit her, but neither you nor Shepard were very forthcoming about why she was on Earth."

"I sent you the the science teams updates on what was discovered at the Archives, Amelia."

"Then why did she visit with Shepard first. And why was she given clearance to get aboard the Normandy. It is more peculiar."

"Speak with Rear Admiral Shepard if you want to know what Dr. T'Soni was doing with her daughter. It's a fun conversation. I didn't give her clearance to board the Normandy. I don't generally try to step on your toes."

Snyder knitted her brows together and her eyes flashed. He did enjoy getting her angry, it was so easy to do. "I have my doubts about Shepard insistence she and the asari are sleeping together."

"I've never found her insistent about it. If anything she does her best to downplay it. Her mother certainly isn't happy about it."

"I did not contact you to speak of Shepard's mother, Stephen. I need to know what you are planning."

Hackett did his best to keep his composure. This woman was beyond infuriating. Her 'need to know' was just doublespeak for 'I'm trying to get you kicked out of the Alliance, and put myself in your place'. It had been a game they'd played with each other since boot camp, and one neither had ever won. If anything, both of them usually ended up having their plans backfire. Hackett had stopped playing with his first command. Amelia had been needling him ever since.

"I am not planning anything more than what's already been stated in the fleet's report. The scientists here are looking over the data Dr. T'Soni discovered. When they are done, we will start construction. You still doubt Shepard?"

"I have yet to see evidence to support the belief that these 'Reapers' are anything more than a figment of her imagination. And her stunt in January says nothing more than that the pressure is getting to her."

"Kenson's project-"

"I know your line on this, Stephen. I just don't think that diverting resources to this... weapon... is what the Alliance needs right now."

"Thankfully, that is not your decision."

"So be it. I will do what I can to counteract your stupidity, Stephen."

The connection was cut, and Hackett just barely kept from throwing something at the empty space in front of him. She was up to something. He'd gotten reports that she'd had the board call Shepard into a meeting the previous morning. He couldn't see her end game, and it pissed him off.

He sent a message off to T'Soni, and then another to the Shadow Broker. Having to double send everything to her was annoying, but his secret was only safe as long as hers was.

They would be starting construction on the weapon – whatever the scientists found.

Liara grinned as she read the message on her Omni-tool. Today was turning out even better than she had expected. She'd fallen right back to sleep the night before, got an early start, and had found Ashley waiting for her at the front doors of the detention center. And now this.

Hackett's message that they would begin construction within the week was heartening. She didn't know what had caused it – her sources said that the Alliance scientists were still going over the blueprints – but she certainly wasn't going to complain. She shot a quick message back thanking him, then joined Ashley where she waited at the end of the hall.

"Shepard know about the boyfriend?" Williams asked.

"I'm sorry?"

The human tilted her head at Liara's arm, a casually wicked smile on her face. "You've been on that thing all morning. There are only two reasons for that."

"I can think of more than two."

They'd made it to Shepard's door. Vega was leaning casually against the wall. He glared at Liara even as he saluted the Lieutenant Commander. Williams nodded at him, and didn't bother to respond to Liara.

"Take five, Lieutenant," Williams told Vega, approaching the door.

"Yes, ma'am," he said, unlocking the door and giving it a quick rap with his knuckles before walking down the hall.

Liara shook her head. Most powerful woman in the galaxy and she couldn't get Vega to leave her alone with Shepard for five seconds, but he trotted off like a puppy for Williams. Damn military.

"If the admirals want to see me again, tell them to make a goddamned appointment. I am not leaving this room until this book is finished!" came a muffled answer to Vega's knock. Ashley walked in first, Liara on her heels. Shepard looked up at them, then stood slowly, eying Williams carefully.

"Shepard," Ashley said.

"Ash," the other woman replied.

The two women stared each other down, neither blinking. Liara thought it was all rather childish, but it was better than having Vega here. They'd always been on good terms before, but she had a feeling he wasn't going to be quite as trusting as he had once been. She rolled her eyes and leaned back against the counter, pulling up her Omni-Tool again. The least she could do was go through some of the messages she'd been letting pile up while Shepard and Williams had their little pissing contest.

She was just about to send a rather threatening blackmail letter to a certain Salarian Delatrass when she heard her name.

"Liara? Earth to Liara?" Shepard's voice broke through her concentration and she looked up from the message she was writing.

Both women were now looking at her, with almost identical expressions of amusement on their faces. She glanced from one to the other and back again, her eyes finally meeting the Commanders.

"Sorry. Work's been piling up," she said in way of explanation. Telling Shepard she thought the animosity between her and Williams was ridiculous and that the energy could be spent much more productively elsewhere probably wasn't a good idea when she had plans to drag the woman bodily from the room if she had to within the next day. Doubly so since it seemed that the animosity between them, if not gone, had melted slightly with their stare down and whatever conversation they'd had while she was preoccupied.

"You keeping Prothean ruins in your omni-tool now?" Ashley asked, smirking.

"What? No. Why would you-" Liara stopped and pursed her lips, eyes narrowing slightly. Of course. Ashley had no clue about her current job. As far as Williams was concerned the last time they had spoken was at Shepard's wake – where Ashley had ranted about not having a body to put in the ground. Liara hadn't mentioned anything about her recent return from dropping the Commander's body off with Cerberus. She and Ashley hadn't exactly gotten along that well on the first Normandy, and the only reason Ash had spoken to her that day was because she'd had a few too many at the open bar. "I'm afraid my academic days were cut short when you and Shepard pulled me from that stasis field, Ashley."

"Liara's an information broker now. And one who has apparently stolen my favorite shirt. I spent over an hour looking for that you know. And the worst part is it looks better on you."

Liara looked down and saw that she had, in fact, grabbed one of the Commander's shirts from her bag when she got dressed that morning. The shirt had fit Shepard tightly, but had been the only one supplied by the Illusive Man to not bare the Cerberus logo. It was not something Shepard had ever worn while on duty, but she'd worn it almost constantly during the weekend she'd spent on the Shadow Broker base before turning herself in. Liara had commandeered it while Shepard hadn't been looking. She'd lost it with the Normandy, and hadn't seen it in three hundred years. She had honestly not noticed what it was when she'd thrown it on that morning.

"I kept trying tell you, Skipper," Ashley said with a grin, "she's trouble."

"Whatever, Ash. If I may ask...I can ask questions can't I, Williams? Why are you here?" Shepard was still looking at Liara as she spoke, her hands shoved into her pockets, eyes searching.

"I asked her to come," Liara answered, quickly saving the unsent message. "We'll be leaving tomorrow."

"Liara, we talked about this," Shepard said sadly.

"I know we did. That's why I wanted Lieutenant Williams here." Liara ignored Williams questioning gaze, running through the plans she'd come up with that morning. "Under Galactic Law, Title XIII, subsection D, paragraph 8, the holding of a Council ship without authorization can result in the council and any of its member species taking action against the person or organization deemed to be holding the property illegally," she paraphrased.

"What are you talking about, holding a Council ship?" Ashley interjected.

"Furthermore," Liara continued, approaching Shepard and ignoring the interruption, "if said property is to return to Council space any and all crew members aboard that are affiliated with the parties responsible for taking the property originally can, and likely will, be tried for crimes against the Galactic Community."

"Liara, the Normandy is hardly-"

She laid a single finger against Shepard's lips, meeting the other woman's glare with a soft smile. "However, I have made several inquiries, and in the event that the ship is returned to the Citadel and the Alliance makes a full, and they have even agreed to private, apology, the crew will be dealt a full pardon."

"What is she talking about, Shepard? The Alliance isn't holding any Council ships."

"She's talking about the Normandy," Shepard replied when Liara had finally dropped her hand. "But there is one small problem with her plan."

"I don't see a problem," Liara said smugly.

"Really? Because the Normandy isn't a council ship."

The asari laughed. It rang musically through the room, and she was actually a little surprised at how much better it felt to laugh. It wasn't a happy laugh, but the mere action just made her feel lighter. "You're wrong there."

"I'm not."

"Um, actually Skipper...she might be right." Ashley spoke slowly, thoughtfully.

Liara felt her smile widen. She'd hoped Williams would make the connection, that she'd see what Liara's plan was. Ashley Williams might be mildly xenophobic and all sorts of bitter, an emotion Liara was all too familiar with, but she was bright.

"What do you mean she's right? The Normandy is an Alliance vessel. I was there when they christened the damn thing. Thought it was a damn waste of a good bottle of champagne, to be honest."

"That was the first Normandy." Liara smiled as she spoke. She had gone through everything she could remember, had wished desperately for a moment that she was a drell, had decided it probably was a good thing she wasn't, and had finally remembered one tiny bit of information that would have her and Shepard off the planet and off doing what Illira wanted without anyone being shot at. She was strangely proud of her plan.

"So what? Cerberus gave me the SR-2, I gave it to the Alliance. At worst the ship belongs to Cerberus, but they _are_ a terrorist organization so I don't think anyone's going to mind much what the Alliance does with it."

"Except that you were reinstated as a Spectre."

Shepard sighed. She adored this woman, but sometimes it was like she spoke in circles on purpose. "So what?"

"So, by extension the Normandy belongs to the council. You were a council Spectre, the Normandy was your ship, ergo the Normandy belonged to the Council," Ashley murmured.

"Exactly! And, they registered the ship." Liara took a step away from Shepard and crossed her arms. She hadn't felt like this in a long time. This odd, tingling sense of accomplishment that came with one-upping Shepard. It was not an easy thing to do, nor something that she'd ever made a habit of before Shepard had died. But Liara did so like getting her way.

"But I handed it over, Liara. It was all perfectly legal."

"Only the Alliance has yet to register it as theirs. Since you were a Spectre, they can, but it seems the paperwork has fallen through the cracks." The human expression had become one of Liara's favorites on Earth. It had seemed to be a comment on her life. With the exception of Illira she was little more than a discarded bit of tree pulp shoved between two desks. Embracing that thought was part of why she and her daughter had been having so many problems, but it had been better than the alternative. Better than the pain.

"Why do I have a feeling you made sure it did?"

Liara scoffed, "I've only been here a couple of days, Shepard. I'm good, but I'm not that good. I'm fairly certain they just forgot. If I hadn't made a few discrete calls, the Council wouldn't have even noticed. Now though, it seems they don't want people to think the Alliance can walk all over them."

Williams stared at her. "What?" she asked slowly.

"Let it go, Ash. It's not worth it," Shepard muttered, defeated. "You're taking the Normandy, then."

"We're taking the Normandy."

"For the love of God, Liara, just say what you mean. I already told you I can't leave."

"You have to take the Normandy to the Council. If I do it all the poor people on the ship will be arrested by C-Sec. Part of the deal I worked out."

"I'm not entirely sure I'm following, T'Soni," Williams practically growled.

"It's like this. You and Lieutenant Vega are going to escort Shepard to the Normandy. There, as a member of the Council's Special Tactics and Reconnaissance Team she will command the ship and take it to the Citadel. It seems fairly simple to me."

"Except I don't remember ever saying I was going to be a part of this."

"You would allow Shepard to be out of Alliance custody, Lieutenant Commander?" Liara's voice turned sickly sweet as she smiled. It was a fairly easy manipulation, and one that she hadn't even expected to have to use. But then, she was a little rusty.

Ashley bit the inside of her cheek to keep from yelling, glaring at the two women before her. The logical, impartial part of her brain was telling her that the best thing to do would be to tell Liara to shove it and walk out. The part of her that had felt so guilty about how she'd treated Shepard on Horizon that she'd spent the few weeks after thinking of ways to make it up to her was fairly certain this was the end all be all of awesome plans. Under normal circumstances she did not use the illogical part of her brain. It was that part of her brain that had caused her to snap at Liara after Kaidan had died even though she knew quite well what the Commander's reaction would be. It was that part of her brain that had gotten her into more trouble that she could remember in high school. She usually ignored that part of her brain because it generally got her into trouble.

"What about Vega?" she asked, thinking if worst came to worst she could always just not show up to play escort, and that every so often being illogical made a person human.

"He's already taken care of." He'd backed himself into his own corner by embracing his role as Shepard's guard. And when he'd taken it upon himself to remain with her even after it was clear that the Alliance wasn't out for blood he had irrevocably tied himself to the Commander like a child tied to a mother's apron string. Vega would follow Shepard to hell and back, because this stint guarding her had been his chance at redemption. That little confession, made on the Citadel a few weeks before they'd attacked Cronos Station, had been one of those stray thoughts that had pushed her forward with this. Sometimes, people needed redemption. And so far thing were working like a charm.

"This is just ridiculous, Liara," Shepard sighed, voice tinged with exasperation. "This seems a bit complex just to get me out of this room. Are you sure that you've thought this all through?"

"More than you know, Shepard. The Normandy will be ready to fly tomorrow at 1400. Just be ready."

Shepard and Ashley shared a look. It said more to Liara than she really wanted to admit she saw. Shepard believed her story, Ashley had no idea what was going on, but in that one moment the two had apparently had a very similar thought.

Liara T'Soni was going mad.

She wasn't, she told herself. She was just playing along with whatever nightmare she'd been thrown into. It wasn't insanity, it was more like a long, intense game of make believe. She remembered long hours in the summer afternoons playing all sorts of games with Illira. Acting out human and asari fairy tales, exploring hidden ruins in the spare bedroom, and building fortresses out of sheets. This was no different. Even if all of this was true, even if she'd been thrown back in time, it didn't make a difference to the right then.

The game was the same.

So she let them have their look, their shared smile, and tried to keep the scowl off her face. They'd follow her – because Shepard believed and Ashley was a soldier to the core – and when she reached the endgame and discovered one way or another what the hell it was she was doing, she could look back on this moment and smile.

When Shepard realized Liara wasn't going to call them on their smirking, she finally said, "Okay, fine. I'll bite. But I swear, Liara, this comes back to bite me in the ass and I'm taking you down with me."

"Sounds fair," she answered with a smile.

Ashley strode purposefully down the hall the next day, feeling a bit like she'd signed a pact with the devil. And she didn't know if that devil was Shepard or T'Soni. Liara's plan was very simple. She had apparently spread the word around the ship, as a rumor, that the Council would be taking their ship back, thank you very much. She had planted a secondary rumor that anyone on board would be tried under council law if the ship had to be recovered from Earth and wasn't simply handed back. Late last night Williams had heard one of the scientists saying that Shepard was going to break out and fly off with the ship in the middle of the night. The person's companion had added that anyone who didn't want to go along would be killed.

Williams had wondered, briefly, what had happened to the scared girl locked in a stasis field on Therum. Because she certainly wasn't the woman who had planned all of this.

However, the rumors were working. When Ashley had passed by the dry dock that morning, a few of the crew had been carrying overnight bags with them. The guards had searched them, laughed at them, but let them through. If a bunch of scientists wanted to bring their pj's to work, that wasn't an overworked private's problem. And, somehow, Liara had managed to get a hold of prisoner transfer papers that appeared to be the real thing. It was these that Ashley showed the guard at the detention center door before heading for Shepard's room. Vega was waiting outside. She hadn't spoken to him, but clearly someone had. He was in full armor.

"You ready for this, Lieutenant?" she asked walking up along side him.

"No. I'm sorry ma'am, but I can't let you do this."

Williams raised an eyebrow at the younger man. Apparently one part of Liara's plan wasn't working out the way the asari had hoped. "Can't let me do what? It's all been taken care of."

"It's all a bunch of horseshit, is what it is, if I may be blunt, Lieutenant Commander."

"You obviously don't need my permission. But that doesn't change the fact that you have orders. And I outrank you. So pack up the prisoner. Double time, soldier."

Vega stilled his features. It wouldn't do to keep Shepard locked up only for him to be court martialed for disobeying a direct order. One that, if the signature that he could just make out on Lieutenant Commander's William's data pad was real, had been signed by one of the highest ranking admirals currently on Earth. He slapped his hand against the lock on Shepard's door, not bothering to knock.

"Ready, skipper?" Williams asked, seeing Shepard standing at rest in the middle of the room, waiting.

"As I'll ever be. Don't hold this against Liara, will you? She's had a rough few years." More like a rough few hundred years, but Shepard didn't think William's was quite ready for that piece of information.

"Of course not, ma'am. Lieutenant, if you'd lead the way," Ashley said while she shackled Shepard.

They filed out of the room, Vega a half step ahead of Shepard, Ashley walking at her side. Vega kept letting his hand drift to his sidearm. He kept expecting someone to jump out and yell at him for allowing this to happen.

No one did. And the guard at the door asked for Shepard's autograph. She held up her cuffed hands with a shrug, but didn't speak to him. He thanked her anyway – his sister had been living on Eden Prime when the geth attacked. Shepard felt awkward as he talked to her while double checking her transfer papers for Ashley. When she was in uniform, striding through the halls, feeling full of herself, she didn't mind the attention. It made her feel like she was at least making up for some of the horrible shit she'd done. But today was different. Liara had manipulated the system to get her to this point. She was wearing civilian clothes, her hands here bound, and though she knew he meant well all the guard's praise just made her feel like everything she had done hadn't really amounted to much.

She was tempted, when he'd finally handed the data pad back to Williams, to tell her and Vega to just take her back. That she'd find some way of explaining it to Liara. She figured the council wouldn't really sanction to the Alliance for Shepard giving over the Normandy. That was just absurd. Anderson may have stepped down as Councilor, but Udina would make sure that the council didn't hurt human interests. He was good at that.

She opened her mouth to say just that, when one of Liara's memories floated through her mind.

She'd seen only a flash of it. Liara had been actively trying to keep most of her personal memories away from her, but this had slipped through the images of the Reapers tearing through the galaxy. It was the memory of an asari infant, wrapped tightly in a blanket, laying in a crib. Shepard knew Liara well enough to know that all of this, everything she was doing right now, had one purpose.

She was doing it all for her daughter.

Settling into the backseat Shepard figured this was the least she could do for the daughter she would never know.

Liara was waiting for them just outside the guard post at the dry dock. She was sitting on what Shepard recognized as her old steamer trunk. From ancient earth, the old wooden box was plastered with stickers from places all around the world, many of which hadn't even existed in a hundred years. Where Liara could have come across it – Shepard had left it at the apartment she'd kept on the Luna colony to appease her mother – she didn't have a clue. Shepard had been under the impression her mother had taken everything that had been in the small studio apartment after she had 'died'. Liara had been there once, just after they'd killed Sovereign, but the trunk had been shoved in the back of a closet. Shepard wasn't going to complain though; she loved that trunk.

Vega transferred the steamer into the car and they moved on through the gate. There was a kind of hushed excitement on the dock. No one was moving around the outside of the ship, unlike the last time Liara had been here. A few soldiers passed by, but otherwise the outside of the ship was deserted. Vega waved down a couple of privates walking by to transfer Liara's luggage into the cargo hold before escorting Shepard into the CIC.

Williams undid the cuffs, and Shepard rubbed her wrists while she looked around at all the unfamiliar faces. Then she glanced at Liara who was standing at her side, smiling.

"This is your show, Shadow Broker," Shepard whispered low enough so no one else could hear, "You planned it all. So what do we do about all of them."

In response Liara just grinned. She walked away from Shepard onto the bridge. Ashley and Shepard followed, Vega stayed by the door still thinking that perhaps turning the asari in wouldn't be an entirely bad idea.

"Commander," Joker said when the door to the bridge has slid closed. One of his guards was in the copilot seat, the other was going over system reports.

"Joker," Shepard replied, looking at the guards with an amused grin. She wondered exactly Liara had threatened them with. "You shouldn't call me that."

"Oh right. Spectre, then."

"Are we good to go?" Liara asked.

EDI's avatar popped up beside Joker, "Yes, Dr. T'Soni. I am hacking the docking clamps now. However, given the nature of what we are doing, I would suggest you allow the crew the chance to leave. While the Citadel may give them a blanket pardon, it is unlikely the Alliance will be as forgiving with their soldiers."

Joker's guards looked at at the orb hovering over the console with a mix of confusion and fear, but no one seemed to notice.

"Right," Shepard sighed. "Open the intercoms then."

"Open, Commander. Er...Spectre."

"Attention Normandy refit crew," Shepard said, her voice echoing through the halls of the frigate, "this is Co- This is Shepard with the Council Special Tactics and Reconnaissance Division. Due to a small mix up with paperwork," she glared at Liara who smiled back sweetly, "this ship is to be returned to the control of the Citadel Council immediately. As the only SpecTRe in the system, I will be taking this ship to the Citadel. The council had agreed not to bring action against anyone if the ship is returned. However, you are all members of the Human Systems Alliance, and I can not guarantee that they will not press charges. The ship will be leaving in just over ten minutes. I give you this time to leave. Thank you, Shepard off."

There was a deafening silence in the CIC and the bridge. Shepard listened for the sounds of people rushing to the door. They didn't come. Liara looked past the commander. There had been a few people she had thought would leave if Shepard made her presence known, but apparently she'd been wrong. Most of the crew were scientists. She'd hoped to get an actual trained crew on the ship, but that hadn't been possible. She stilled her conscience with the belief that this time at least they shouldn't actually end up in a battle. She should be back on her beach with Illira within a week. And if she was doubly lucky, she'd have had a few decades with Shepard she hadn't before.

Vega came onto the bridge, looking a little sheepish.

"If I may speak freely, ma'am?"

"I'm not with the Alliance anymore, Vega."

"Right, well, I just wanted to apologize. I'll be down in the cargo bay if you need me."

Shepard watched him go, not entirely sure what he was apologizing for. She looked at Williams, but the other woman shrugged.

The ten minutes she'd given the crew passed slowly. No one left. Work resumed on the ship – it might be flight worthy, but cosmetically there was still a lot to be done – as the crew waited for Shepard's time limit to expire. When it did she turned to Joker.

"Alright, I guess we better get going before Liara kicks all our asses."

"I have no intention of doing any such thing. It would be the council that would be upset."

"Uh-huh. Just get us out of here Joker."

"Aye-aye, ma'am. Alliance Tower, this is Normandy requesting permission to take off. Council approval ST7786. We have a Spectre on board."

There was silence on the other end, and Joker waited.

"Permission denied, Normandy. The ship is still scheduled for further repairs."

"Tell that to the aliens. We're scheduled to rendezvous at the Citadel in six hours."

Again there was a pause on the other end. Longer this time.

"We apologize for the inconvenience, however the Normandy does not have permission to leave dock. If you attempt it you will be shot down."

"Then you'd just have to fix us again, you idiots," Joker muttered, making sure he wasn't broadcasting. "EDI, whats the status on the guns?"

"Docking clamps are disabled. AA guns will be unable to fire for the next twenty one minutes thirty four seconds. If you plan on leaving Jeff, I suggest we do so now."

"Hold on Commander," Joker laughed as the Normandy took off. The control tower was yelling at them, but no one could hear what they were saying. They broke through Earth atmosphere, and Jokers leveled them out. "ETA for the Sol Relay one hour, nineteen minutes. We should be approaching the Citadel in about four hours."


	5. Chapter 5

**This was almost impossible to write. I don't know why it was so difficult, but it was. **

** On top of having the hardest time getting this down on paper, I also cut a chunk of it. It was a flashback to Liara's time on Illium, and it killed what little flow this chapter actually has. I fleshed it out though, and posted it here www . fanfiction s/ 8214359/1 /A_Lucky_Woman , if you want to read it. I don't think its necessary, but I liked the story, so I ran with it (and it'll make the end make a little less 'huh?' if I ever get to that point :) Anyway, onwards, and I'm sorry its so clunky.**

Shepard marched through the CIC, ignoring the few people who saluted her. Liara and Ashley followed a step behind, listening to Joker chuckle to himself. Liara nodded to Traynor who was staring at the three of them. Her jaw was slightly slack and the only part of her that moved as Shepard walked by was her eyes. Liara was distracted enough by thoughts of exactly how to curtail the other woman's interests, since she had the chance to do it again, and walked right into Shepard's back.

"Oof-" she breathed, as Shepard spun around, placing a steadying hand on her shoulder.

"Unless you have an issue with it Williams, I think maybe you should talk to the crew. As an Alliance soldier. Let them know I'll talk to Udina and Hackett. Maybe I can work something out for them, since somebody decided to butt her blue nose into things."

"Aye aye, ma'am." Williams said, grinning at Liara's insulted huff.

"I didn't do anything you wouldn't have in my position, Shepard."

"Like hell," Shepard said, affronted. She smiled as she said it though, and let her hand trail down Liara's arm. It was so light as to be almost nonexistent, and she could barely feel it through the sleeve of her coat, but Liara looked to see if anyone had seen anyway. Shepard was always so careful about touching her where people could see. It had been a sore point between them that Garrus would get what Shepard called her 'bro-hug' right in the middle of the mess, but unless they were off the ship Shepard wouldn't so much as hold her hand where someone might catch them. Of course, none of that had happened yet, as that particular conversation didn't happen until a few weeks after the Reapers attacked. On the Citadel Shepard would wrap her arm around her waist and they'd walk the bridges spanning the Presidium Lakes, but as soon as they got back to the docks, or if one of the crew came by, Shepard had always taken a step away.

She'd said it was simply a matter of professionalism. They were in the middle of a war, she'd said, and though a ship like the Normandy was much too small to keep secrets, shoving their relationship upon everyone was inappropriate when everyone aboard knew they could die the next day. Liara had always thought that was a perfect reason to do exactly the opposite, but she'd never said so.

Shepard's fingers lingered on the back of her gloved hand, and Liara turned to face the other woman again. "There's a lot of work to do before we get to the Citadel. And I need to contact Feron."

"I don't know where they moved the comm, but you should be able to get a line out from the Captain Quarters. If you don't mind, Williams?"

"The ships yours, Skipper."

Shepard opened her mouth to object – Williams was the highest ranking Alliance soldier on board, and Shepard still considered the Normandy an Alliance ship whatever legal games Liara was playing – but Liara put a hand on her arm. Her eyes spoke volumes, but mostly they said 'don't start a scene in front of everyone'.

"You know the way," Shepard sighed, hitting the button for the elevator.

She followed Liara up to her old quarters, but then rode the elevator back down. Liara watched her go, wondering why she felt so strangely hollow watching her go. She'd lived years without the woman, hadn't been alone with her since she'd seen her the first time a couple days before. Now, though, there was sinking feeling in her stomach she couldn't place. She had never felt anything like it before, but she knew she didn't like it. It was a bit like losing Shepard all over again, even though she was just a few floors below her. Shoving her feelings away, something she thought she was much too good at, Liara turned into the cabin.

"Shepard is asking for you to meet her on the observation deck," EDI's voice resounded through the cabin just as Liara got off the comm with Feron.

"Did she say why?"

"Negative, Dr. T'Soni. She simply requested that I ask you to join her."

"Thank you, EDI." Liara looked around the cabin as she moved for the door. She hadn't really looked at it when she'd come in, she hadn't been lying about having work to do. It didn't look like they'd touched it. The fish tank was empty, but other than that it looked exactly like it had the last time she'd been here. Well, the bed had had sheets on it, and Shepard had kept a spare pair of boots under the desk that didn't appear to be there anymore, but otherwise it was the same. It was strange how much at home she felt here, despite having never really lived here. It was an oversight she planned to correct.

For the moment though she left the cabin and went down to the crew deck. She didn't look at the mess, or toward her old office, but walked carefully to the observation deck. She trailed her fingers along the bulkhead, not having realized until that moment how much she'd actually missed the ship. Not as much as she'd missed Shepard, but it was a fairly close second. In comparison to the number of years she'd lived, she hadn't spent much time on the ship. And yet, it had been the first place she had felt at home since she'd become an adult. She hadn't even really had a home after the war. For the first half a century home was where ever Illira was, but when she'd turned 57 she'd gotten a job on the far side of the planet and though back then they had still spoken daily, Liara had gone back into habits she'd picked up working in dig sites. She kept herself to herself, and had picked up her maiden years more or less where she'd left them. She hadn't lived in the same place more than eight months after Illira left home until she had officially entered her Matron stage less than sixty years before.

She reached back and rubbed her lower spine, finding the reverse to the changes in her body more difficult to handle than the change in the first place.

The observation deck doors opened, and she saw Shepard, her head pressed against the thick glass of the viewing portal.

"It's all wrong isn't it?" Shepard said, not moving away. She had one arm up over her head, the other hung limply at her side. Liara thought she looked defeated, and the idea sickened her. Throughout the entire war Shepard hadn't looked like this. Even after Thessia she hadn't looked this crushed.

"What is?" Liara asked, a hitch in her voice. She didn't like this. Nothing was wrong. Everything was going perfectly. She moved to Shepard's side, pulling her arm down off the glass.

"This. Everything. I feel like a criminal, Liara." She glanced at over at Liara, and quickly added, "I don't blame you. I know you kept everything legal. But...it shouldn't be like this. We're going to save lives, I know, but I just feel like everything is just a little bit off center. Like I'm teetering on the edge of something and if I keep going the way I am I'm going to start falling."

"It's different. It's not wrong."

Shepard turned, wrapping Liara in her arms. It took Liara a moment to relax, to hug the Spectre back. It had been so long since anyone had held her, had hugged her. It felt...good. And right. And comfortable. And she didn't feel sick, which she figured was a good thing. She nuzzled the side of Shepard's neck, content to just stand there like that forever.

"Maybe," Shepard whispered, leaning her head against Liara's. After a moment of silence she added, "I'm going back as soon as we're done on the Citadel."

"You can't!" Liara pushed herself away from Shepard's hug, looking into the human's eyes.

"I have to, Liara. Once we're done here, once Hackett builds that...thing, it'll be over."

"But-" Liara started to say, but Shepard shook her head.

"No. I know what you're going to say, but you're not going to change my mind, Liara. Maybe when the weapon...thing...whatever...is finished they'll let me go."

Liara thought quickly, her mind running through events that she'd tried so hard not to think about for years. "What about the Genophage?"

"What about it? I don't have anything to do with that."

Liara bit her bottom lip. Maybe this wasn't the best time to bring this up. Maybe she should let events play out the way they would now. But Shepard was going to leave again. Just after she got her back. "You have to cure it."

Shepard laughed, throwing her head back. Her smile was contagious, even though Liara knew it was directed at her.

"You're kidding."

"No. You cured it so that the Krogan would fight on Palaven, officially. Everyone knows you actually did it because you found the whole thing abominable." She shrugged. "Wrex spends a hundred years telling every person he walked into about it. Illira was very proud of it."

"Illira's our..." Shepard let the sentence die out. It was harder to swallow now that it had been before. She certainly hadn't grown up ever expecting to be a father.

"Daughter. Yes."

"Illira," Shepard said again, as if testing the name out, "It's pretty. And if I don't cure the genophage...?"

"You'll have a very disappointed child on your hands?" Liara smirked.

"And the wrath of one ticked off Krogan battlemaster. Because goddamned if Wrex won't find out."

Liara shrugged, not sure how to respond. Wrex would never find out unless she told him, but at the same time if Shepard wanted to believe that, she certainly wouldn't stop her.

"You're getting too good at your job Liara." Shepard held out and arm, and Liara was not about to forgo the invitation. She leaned against Shepard's side, sighing as the other woman wrapped an arm around her.

"I'm good at everything I do, Shepard. You know that. I'm sorry I had to do it this way. You're just stubborn."

Shepard laughed, "You wouldn't have me any other way. I make no promises, but it would be nice to do something good just for the sake of it for a change. And you can't have too many favors owed to you by a Krogan."

Liara smiled, but remained silent. There really wasn't anything for her to say. She kissed Shepard's cheek, drawing her over to the sofa. They sat, Shepard's arm still a comforting weight on her shoulders. She considered mentioning Shepard's change of heart when it came to touching her in the communal areas of the ship, but while she didn't know exactly why someone shouldn't look ancient earth mounts in their mouths if they were being given to you as a present, she had a good understanding of the basic meaning of the expression and kept her mouth shut. And for the first time since she'd arrived back here, Liara really didn't want to wake up.

* * *

Liara glanced over the top of her datapad to where her father was in the process of bribing the owner of Apollo's Cafe into giving her a job. Aethyta was a pretty good spy, all things considered, and had her target been anyone other than the Shadow Broker chances are she'd have never been caught. Of course, that was a long time ago, and quite a few months into the future. For right now, Liara kept glancing at the father she had lost right after she'd found her, and smirking at how hard Aethyta was ignoring her. She was doing a good job of that too. There was no tension in her back, her eyes didn't dart. Had Liara not already known what she was doing there, she wouldn't have even suspected the older asari knew who she was. She reached out and grabbed her glass of Kritali – a punch made from native Thessian fruit similar to a lemon, but a bright, vibrant blue – and turned her attention back to the datapad.

It had been three hours since the ship had docked on the Citadel and Shepard had been led away by C-Sec to visit with the council. In that time Liara had seen Feron, convinced C-Sec that they needed to move her equipment on board the Normandy for her, eaten dinner, and bought Shepard new sheets. Now she was sitting in the eternal afternoon of the Presidium, waiting for Shepard to finish what she was doing. She had also pondered all the consequences of her actions. She didn't like what she saw. EDI, the Krogan, the Geth, all of them were were teetering on the cusp of destruction because she had come back. Was saving the lives of her people, of the Batarians, of humans and turians, worth double genocide and the loss of a friend? She honestly wasn't sure. She watched a single drop of condensation drip down the side of her glass, wishing she had the answers.

"I thought that you," came a familiar voice. Liara looked up suddenly, smiling widely.

"Dr. Chakwas!" Liara was surprised at how happy she was to see the doctor. She supposed she shouldn't be. The doctor had been her first friend aboard the original Normandy. Before Tali, before Garrus, before even Shepard had gone from schoolgirl crush to close friend to lover, there had been Karin Chakwas. The older human had often reminded Liara of her mother when she'd been young. She was always willing to offer a sympathetic ear and shoulder to cry on if it was needed. The crew often took the doctor for granted, but Liara had found a very close friend in the human doctor.

"Dr. T'Soni," Chakwas said, laughing a little. "Are we being formal today?" The doctor took the seat across from Liara.

Liara chucked, reminded of her own conversations with Nillye every time she had seen her daughter-in-law. "I'm sorry Karin. It's just been a long time."

"Longer for some than others, if what Shepard told me is true," the doctor said with a curious look.

Liara felt a wave of panic build up inside her. How could Shepard do this? Certainly, she hadn't told Shepard not to tell anyone, but she had just assumed the closet physicist would understand the basics of time travel paradoxes. Illira had said not to let anyone know, to not tell a soul. She swallowed hard, searching desperately for a lie, or a joke...anything to stop the doctor from believing anything Shepard had said. She heard the doctor laugh, and looked up at her.

"I take it the Commander was not pulling my leg then?"

Liara sighed, "No, though I don't suppose you have any reason to believe me." Well, the cat wasn't going back in the bag.

"I've believed Shepard about stranger things. I don't see why I should stop now."

Liara made a noncommittal noise, poking at a piece of ice with a straw. Dr. Chakwas had always stood by the Commander, even when Liara had not. Like Garrus and Tali. Joker. She took a drink, wondering at her melancholy mood. She always thought she would be happy when she got Shepard back. Of course, she had thought that the first time the woman had died as well.

"When did you see Shepard?" she finally asked, meeting the doctor's eyes.

"At Huerta Memorial, about half an hour ago. We have an old friend there."

"Thane," Liara said, remembering how the drell had saved the councilor. She had seen him when she'd toured the Normandy just after being reunited with Shepard the first time, but had never met him. His death had shaken Shepard to the core, and it hurt Liara that she'd have to go through that again. Even if the other woman didn't remember the first time.

"Yes. He doesn't have much longer, his condition is deteriorating. Shepard asked me to tell you she'll be running a little late."

"Of course. Thank you."

"I was called to speak with Councilor Udina on my way up here. He'd asked me to return to the Normandy."

Liara broke out into a sudden laugh. It seemed the threads of time liked the way things had happened the last time, or at the very least that the universe was intent on Dr. Chakwas being on the Normandy. She was still chuckling when she replied, "I can think of no one better."

"Perhaps," Chakwas said, leaning forward, "but whatever his intentions, I received medical files on the current, and the council's possible, crew. I found something in yours I thought you might want to talk about." She put a datapad on the table. Liara hadn't noticed her holding it before.

She remembered this conversation too. It had been aboard the ship, not long after Shepard had asked the doctor to join them. She knew what Chakwas saw in the reports too. Her dirty little secret. A heavy feeling fell on her, remembering the time, just after Shepard had died, when all she had wanted was live again. The days she'd spent in the hospital, the series of doctors she had seen, all of it was so long ago, but it seemed so close at the same time. As if it had all happened only yesterday. A pretty face, a friend in her darkest time, had been her lifeline when everything around her had been falling apart, and her illness had shoved a wedge between them. Her illness had caused her to reject Shepard when she had come back, and had scared her to her core when Shepard would not accept her no for an answer. She was intrinsically connected to Shepard, she could not leave her, had learned that the hard way, and the last thing she wanted was to discuss it with Dr. Chakwas in the middle of the crowded Presidium.

"I'd really rather not, Doctor. I do not mean to be rude, but it doesn't effect anything aboard ship."

"Except the Commander."

"Shepard is unaffected. It is a manageable condition." Manageable by never letting anyone get too close.

"Does she even know?"

"It doesn't effect her, and I don't think it's really any of your business."

"I'm only trying to help, Liara. Dr. Bal'lar is a leading expert on asari physiology, and yet it says here when you went to see her, she couldn't find-"

"It doesn't matter, doctor."

"Liara," Chakwas sighed, shaking her head softly.

"Shepard was dead, Dr. Chakwas. She is no longer. It isn't important."

"Have you two..." the doctor started, then paused, looking at Liara hoping she wouldn't have to finished that sentence. It was not an unexpected question. She hadn't asked it last time, but then, she'd had access to her scanning equipment then and had attempted to run more tests on Liara.

"She is my bondmate," Liara said coldly. That wasn't exactly true, not anymore. Shepard had adopted the word for the two of them not long after they became intimate on the first Normandy, based on an error in all translation programs of the asari language, and Liara had never bothered to correct her. Translators would break the word into it's literal parts, "bond" and "mate", without the additional context. In reality the word was closer to the human word "spouse", and had all the legal ramifications of it. But, the way the translators used it, most species took it to have a more lax meaning, something more than casual girlfriend, but not as strong as wife. Most asari let the mistranslation go, using context to determine how others were using the word. It got the point across here with the doctor, though. And, in any case, Liara was speaking English as it was.

"Right. And you haven't had...issues?"

"I haven't, and I've never heard her complain. Hello, Shepard." She could feel the human drawing closer. A side effect, perhaps to her illness, but a welcome one. She always felt better when Shepard was close.

"What should I be complaining about?" Shepard asked, slipping into the chair beside Liara.

"Nothing," Liara answered, her voice cold.

"I just got here, I'm afraid, Commander. Udina asked me to return to my post aboard the Normandy."

"It's just Shepard, Dr. Chakwas. And if they let me back, I for one will be glad to have you. And if not, you need to promise to come visit me on Earth."

Liara mumbled under her breath, and Shepard smiled at her before leaning over and kissing her cheek. "I know, you won't discuss it again," Liara sighed.

"I'll let you to be. If you want to talk, Liara, you know how to get a hold of me."

"Everything all right?" Shepard asked once Chakwas was gone. She moved from her seat beside the asari and took the doctor's chair, reaching out to take Liara's hands

"Yes," she lied, feeling anything but. She didn't like thinking about the first time Shepard had died, the way her heart had seemed to permanently broken. And just when she thought she had the strength to fix it, she'd fallen apart.

"Liar," Shepard countered.

"It's unimportant. How did your meeting with the council go?"

Shepard sighed, leaning back in the chair, dropping Liara's hands. "I guess it could have gone worse. Udina is ready to kill me, and I don't know what you have on Tevos, but whatever it is, thank you. I'd probably be looking down the barrel of Udina's bodyguard's sidearm still if it wasn't for her. Normandy's on lockdown for the next week though. Finishing some of the upgrades, and Udina has to clean up my shit again, apparently. I was tempted to tell him it wasn't my fault this time."

"A week?"

"Yeah. It'll give us time to find out what I was talking about though. That sounds weird. You know what I mean, on that...thing. I couldn't find the right place while I was up there. At least, I entered what I think was the right number. 1.61803399, right? I went out ten dicimal places."

"Mmn, the golden ratio. Phi, I think humans call it."

"Exactly, Phi on the tower, that's what I said. Gah, that makes my brain hurt."

Liara chuckled. It felt good to be here alone with Shepard. Alone, except for the growing crowds, of course. Her chuckle turned into a yawn quickly, however, and Shepard stood and offered her hand.

"Come on, to bed with you."

Two hours later, Liara was still wide awake, stifling yawns every few minutes. It was probably nearing midnight back in Vancouver, though it was not quite nine yet, GST. Space travel gave the worst jet-lag. She dug through the Shepard's old trunk – she supposed she should eventually give it back, but it was so damn convenient – dragging out an old battered t-shirt. The trunk was filled with odds and ends of Shepard's life, from clothes she had before joining Anderson on the first Normandy, to old holos of friends she'd had in basic, mixed in with Liara's own clothes. This box contained everything she'd been able to save from Hannah Shepard's purge of Shepard's old apartment, everything she'd thought the Commander might want again. Over the last few centuries, Liara had forgotten about most of what was in here, had forgotten she'd even ever had the thing, but she was glad she'd been able to not only get it onto the Shadow Broker's ship from her place on Illium, but that she'd been able to save it from that ship's destruction.

Trying to recall the memories of Shepard's reaction to seeing the trunk the first time she'd brought it aboard the Normandy, Liara stripped naked, kicking her dirty clothes into a pile by the bathroom door. T-shirt clutched in one hand she moved into the bathroom, absently noting the changes in her appearance, as she did every time she was faced with a mirror.

The hotel she was in, a large, sprawling place on the wards that the council had taken control of until they released the Normandy, wasn't much better than the one she'd stayed in on Earth. When Shepard had taken her back to the ship, they'd found the entire dock closed. Shepard had gone on a small rampage among the C-Sec officers, thankfully not actually hurting anyone, but they had held firm, and the most Shepard had been able to accomplish had been to have Liara's luggage sent to the hotel. She'd dropped Liara off at her room, then said something about needing to go shopping. Liara wasn't sure if she was upset that she hadn't stayed or not. Her conversation with Dr. Chakwas had torn open wounds that had never fully healed, and it had left her feeling raw and vulnerable.

She could barely remember most of her time on Illium, her days had been very similar to each other, but even after all this time the one friend she'd made there stood out to her in her mind. The one person she'd let close before everything had exploded in her face. The only woman other than Shepard she had ever loved. She'd been naive back then, feeling safe in the knowledge that her harmlessness would protect her. She supposed it had, it had been her own body that had betrayed her. Had kept her from betraying Shepard.

Liara sighed, not wanting to think about it anymore. The simple truth was she could not even begin the Joining with anyone other than Shepard. The doctor's were stumped, and had told her she'd eventually grow out of it. She hadn't, but that hardly mattered. She was back with Shepard now, and her brief, highly embarrassing attempt to join with Shepard in the middle of her cell a few days before had proven things were as they'd been before. That was all that mattered, in the long run.

She pulled the t-shirt over her head, tugged it over her thighs, and crawled into bed.

She wasn't really tired anymore, though. Thinking of Illium, of Shepard, of what she had attempted to do with Vega standing right behind her, left her wide awake. She reached over and grabbed the photo album, hoping that the pictures of Illira would help her drift to sleep. She hoped to dream of her daughter.

It was like this that Shepard found her; sitting cross-legged on the bed, in a t-shirt Shepard hadn't worn since she'd left her mother's ship to join the Alliance, the large leather bound album open on her lap. Shepard dropped her bags beside the door, noting with interest that the normally reactive Shadow Broker hadn't even looked up when the door opened. She glided around to the far side of the bed and sat down. "Heya, Blue, whatcha reading?" she asked, laughing when Liara jumped.

"Shepard! What are you doing here?"

"Hey, my intentions are honorable, unless you'd rather they not be," Shepard answered, leaning over and capturing Liara's mouth with hers in a brief kiss. She trailed kisses along Liara's jaw line, enjoying the soft hum that came from the back of her lover's throat as she did.

"That's not answering my question," Liara said, tilting her head to let Shepard have better access at her neck.

"I had planned on sleeping. Though you keep wearing my clothes and neither of us is probably going to sleep again." She ran a finger along the neck line of the t-shirt, tugging it gently.

"But I thought- ah..." Liara gasped, letting what she thought fall away as Shepard nipped at the base of her throat, where neck met shoulder.

"You thought what?" Shepard asked, pulling away and leaning over the side of the bed to unlace her boots. Liara growled at the loss of contact, but thought maybe it was for the best. It had been a very long time.

"That the council had gotten you your own room," she answered flatly, picking the album off the bed where it had fallen.

"They did," Shepard said carefully, her boots and socks half off, looking over her shoulder at Liara, "Do you want me to leave?"

"What? No! Certainly not. I just never thought you'd come here, we didn't before, you said something about morale."

"I wouldn't let you move in?" Shepard asked with a grin.

"Well, I didn't ask. I didn't think, I just thought that you didn't -" Shepard cut her off with another kiss, moving onto the bed, fully clothed still except for her feet which were completely bare.

"I don't know what happened, why I'd do that, though I'm sure I had some reason. Whatever it was, it was probably very important, and for the best, but it does not apply now." She scooted closer to Liara, looking down at the now-closed album on the other woman's lap. "What's that? You had it with you before."

Liara ran a hand over the cover, leaning into Shepard slightly, before opening it. "I made it." She handed the book over to Shepard, who sat up straight and began flipping through the pages.

"Oh, God," she murmured, running her fingers over a close up Illira, missing both her front teeth. To Shepard she looked to be about five, maybe six, but Liara's tiny hand beneath the photo said the girl was eleven. "That's her?"

"A very long time ago. There's nothing recent in there, I already looked," Liara said with a sad sigh.

"Recent for you is three hundred years in the future. Ow, brain. Hurts," Shepard laughed. "Oh! Look at you!"

Shepard had found a picture Samara had taken about eighteen months after the war. She and Tali had been out in the English countryside during the three month confinement all asari mother's had to take in the later part of their pregnancies before the secondary umbilicals reattached. Liara was laying on a plastic lounge chair, blushing purple, while Tali told some ridiculous story about the fleet Liara could no longer remember.

"I was terrified I would lose her," Liara said, choking on the unexpected emotion that welled inside her.

"The baby?" Shepard asked, wrapping an arm around Liara's shoulders when she nodded. "What happened?"

"Nothing. It was a perfectly healthy pregnancy from start to finish. Samara told me my worries were 'perfectly natural' though. I'm still not sure if that was comforting coming from a woman carrying the Ardat-Yakshi gene."

"Illira wasn't...?"

"No. Perfectly healthy."

Shepard set the album aside, rolling over to look into Liara's eyes. "I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"For not being there with you. For breaking my promise."

Liara laughed, "I knew when I had you make it you couldn't keep it Shepard. I'm not a child."

Shepard smiled sadly, then leaned over to kiss her again. She rolled Liara onto her back, pinning her down with her weight. Her hands trailed down the asari's body, deepening the kiss, tounge requesting access to the asari's mouth. She pulled back suddenly when Liara began to struggle. She didn't say anything, just rolled off her, eyes worried even though her desire.

"I..." Liara started, sitting up. "It's..."

"Oh, right, I get it," Shepard said, getting out of the bed, trying not to think of how many people Liara must have been with over the last three hundred years, "I just thought. No it's cool. They're lucky."

"What?" Liara said, startled out of her attempts to explain.

"I always knew you'd outlive me. And that I wouldn't be your last," Shepard told the wall behind Liara's head, unable to look at her. "I shouldn't have presumed anything." She picked up her boots, and headed for the door.

She was attacked from behind as she bent to pick up the bags of supplies she'd gotten after dropping Liara off earlier. She was lifted bodily from the floor and brought back to the side of the bed. Liara's eyes were a swirling black as she stood beside the bed, the flare of her biotics encompassing her hands as she pulled Shepard to her. She dropped Shepard unceremoniously in front of her, and the human woman stumbled a step when the biotic field left her. Before she could say a word, though, Liara had grabbed her, kissing her hard.

"There's never been anyone else. There can never be anyone else. Only you." She pushed Shepard down on the bed, starting work on all the buttons and clasps that held her into her clothes. "It's just been a very very long time. Three hundred and seven years, to be exact." She worked her hands up under Shepard's shirt, letting her hands roam over the bare expanse of her stomach for the first time since they had conceived their daughter.

"Three- Oh, hell," Shepard groaned, head falling back onto the bed, "I never...mmmn, I never wanted you to do that. You didn't have to." Liara had worked the shirt up over Shepard's head, and she seemed intent on mapping the newly exposed skin much the way she'd mapped her face days earlier.

"I did. Now stop talking."

And Shepard wasn't one to disobey a direct order.


	6. Chapter 6

**Update: I uploaded the unedited version and I didn't even notice, cause yeah, I'm just dumb like that. Nothing really new here, some slight changes, they're actually playing five card _stud_ and not five card _draw, _and I fixed some tense issues. **

"...third port on the left side...green cord...no. Red cord. Power supply, SSH cable goes from the processor to the monitor," Liara muttered to herself. She was kneeling under her desk in the XO quarters on the Normandy and trying to hook up the Shadow Broker's computer systems. The network was routed through Glyphs core processors, and then filtered through her Omni-Tool, but it was impossible for her to see the big picture on the fuzzy screen on her arm. Which was why she was here, five days after she had 'rescued' Shepard on her hands and knees trying to pull memories on how the system was set up.

She cursed herself, not for the first time, for not having Feron stick around to do this for her. She was certain Shepard wouldn't have minded him staying on the ship, and he could have taken care of the network for her when she didn't have time. She felt guilty for taking over this room again, too. She had no intentions of ever using the bed that was still in the corner, and as Ashley would be joining them when they left the next day, and Shepard had already convinced the Council that having an Alliance officer as XO could smooth over some of the ripples the loss of Shepard and the Normandy had caused, it only made sense that Williams would take this room. However, when she'd asked Shepard if she could move the small desk in her quarters and put up the monitors, Shepard had refused. She couldn't sleep, she said, with the galaxy looking down on her.

Liara hadn't argued, but had taken everything down to life support. The room would have enough power draw for her computers, and it was out of the way. Engineer Adams had found her, turned a rather fetching shade of purple (she'd been unaware until that point that humans could be that color, she'd never seen it before) and told her in no uncertain terms to get out. And so, with no other alternative, she'd gone to her old room, as gutted as it had been when Shepard had gotten her off of Mars, and begun setting up.

She cursed again, the cord she was trying to plug in not fitting where she remembered it going before. She wasn't horribly tech savvy, and had installed this the last time by sheer luck. Or so she told herself, she honestly couldn't remember how she got the thing installed last time.

She crawled forward, twisting to try and see where the cord in her hand could possibly go. There were voices outside, and she paused to listen. She knew Shepard was out there, could feel her, but she didn't hear her voice.

"...unwarranted...not used...before you say..." She could only make out maybe one word in five of what Vega was saying, and trying to follow the line of conversation was frustrating, especially since the second part of the conversation was completely inaudible. She went back to installing her systems, muttering to herself as things didn't go the way she planned.

Shepard listened to Vega explain his desire to remain on board. When the council had given her a list of her possible crew, it had included a handful of people from the science team that had helped pilot the ship. She'd parsed it down, changing a few assignments. On Liara's suggestion she'd kept Specialist Traynor, though from the dirty look the asari had sent the woman when they'd come on board that morning, she had to wonder why she wanted her there. Vega, however, had not been part of her chosen crew. It wasn't that she didn't like him, he was a good soldier and had been a good friend for the last month, but his animosity toward Liara still bubbled under the surface. Considering the list of candidates for positions aboard the ship had filled two datapads worth of memory, and spilled onto a third, not bringing James along hadn't seemed like a difficult decision.

Except that he had been following her around since she had left Liara's side at the docks that morning.

"There is only so much room on this ship," she said, keeping her voice low. Liara had said she had work to do, and since Shepard had spent the last few days trying to help Liara make up for lost time they hadn't really left the bed much. So, interrupting her while she was working wasn't something she planned on doing.

"I understand, Commander," he ignored her 'its just Shepard' and continued, "but I noticed that you brought on Fredricks. I've served with him, and I'm not sure -"

"Lieutenant?"

He fell silent, sighing.

"I'm just saying, I'd really appreciate being a part of your crew, ma'am."

"You're sure you'll be able to keep a clear head? I'd hate for you to start pulling guns on my friends again."

"She was attacking you."

Shepard laughed out loud, throwing her head back. The laugh cut off suddenly as she cast a nervous look at Liara's door. "That's about as far from what she was doing as possible. Why don't you head back to the Citadel, do a couple of extranet searches, and then we'll talk."

"But-"

"I have things to do, Vega."

"Yes, Ma'am," he sighed, turning on a heel and heading for the elevator.

When he was gone, though, Shepard couldn't remember for the life of her why she was on the crew deck in the first place. She rubbed the back of her neck, trying to think of what she needed to do. She still had a report to file on the status of the repairs with the council, and she needed to get the final roster finished. That needed to be done by the end of the day, so the crew could get on board before they left in two days. She also needed to figure out where they were going.

The council didn't have anything pressing for her. They had seemed a little reluctant to tell her much of anything, giving her the line about Spectres being free agents and a whole bunch of other hogwash. She wouldn't have gone to see them at all, if she could help it, but she and Liara still hadn't discovered what her other self had meant about phi on the Tower, so they kept heading up to the still under-construction council chambers to figure it out. When they had actually bothered to get up and dressed, in any case. None of that, however, explained why she had left the CIC to come down here. Part of it was to get rid of Vega, she was sure, because he'd been hovering around the Galaxy Map while she'd spoken to Traynor about the changes the woman had planned for it.

Giving up, she headed for Liara's office. She wouldn't bother her, she told herself, just pull up a chair and keep her company until she remembered what it was she was supposed to be doing. She didn't bother signaling, she knew Liara would know it was her. She stepped in, and stopped dead.

Liara was on her knees, stretched out under a desk, a rat's nests of wires all around her. Shepard let her eyes trail over the curve of her back, over her ass and down her legs. The door slid closed behind her and she leaned against it, enjoying the opportunity to watch Liara work without being observed.

"Shepard, don't stare. It's unbecoming."

Or not.

"Sorry," she muttered, taking a step into the room.

Liara backed out from under the table, the series of monitors above her head now going through a boot sequence. Shepard glanced at the screens, then looked back at Liara. She was standing in front of the console, typing in various commands from a datapad on the desk beside her. She'd had the wherewithal to get this from Feron, even if she'd forgotten to ask him to help her plug the thing in.

"Was there something you needed?"

"Hmm? No, just thought I'd come by. Keep you company."

Liara glanced over her shoulder and smiled, "That's kind of you. Don't you have to get the ship ready to go, though?"

"No sure where we're going." Shepard had a sudden thought. They'd been on the Citadel for days now, but the few times they hadn't eaten in their room, they'd been joined by either Williams or Joker. "And, um, I was thinking maybe we could go to dinner?" She wasn't sure why she felt so nervous. It's not like that hadn't eaten together before. They'd eaten alone, in their room, last night. Most of the food had ended up being forgotten on the floor, but that was beside the point.

"Now? I'm a little busy. And its a little early. We just had breakfast a couple hours ago."

"No. Tonight. Just...I thought maybe just the two of us."

"Like a date?" Liara asked with a smirk.

"Yeah, like that."

"I'd love to, Shepard. But I am busy right now, and you need to make sure the mess is stocked." _That_ was what she'd been doing on the crew deck, of course.

"Right. So, um, sixish?"

"Of course." She turned back to her monitors, which were finally popping up with the map of the galaxy. "I'll see you then."

"Right. Bye then."

"Bye Shepard. Love you."

Shepard stopped, hand poised to open the door. She turned around and stared at Liara's back. It wasn't that she hadn't been aware that Liara loved her, or that she loved her back. It came through quite clearly through the meld. She'd known since Ilos that Liara's feelings for her weren't just a physical attraction. But they had never said it out loud. At first, it had seemed like it was just too soon. You don't fall in love with someone over the course of a few weeks. And then she'd been dead, and Liara had been so different from who she'd been, and 'love' had been put on the back burner while she was sent across Nos Astra hacking terminals. They'd found the Shadow Broker, and though Shepard had known Liara's feelings for her hadn't changed, it simply hadn't been the right time. And for Liara to say it so casually now, like it wasn't the most important thing she'd ever said...ever...caused all the air in Shepard's lungs leave in a large rush.

Liara turned and looked at her, confusion etching her face. "Are you okay?"

"What? I'm okay. Um...I love you, too?" She watched the color leave Liara's face and she leaned back against the table. She bit her bottom lip, and Shepard smiled. It was just too cute when she did that.

"Shepard...," Liara started.

"I love you," Shepard said, walking up to her, "You know that. I just always expected it would be a bit more...involved, when I finally said it."

Liara grinned, "It was. You stumbled over it for a good ten minutes, much to Williams' amusement."

"Ash was there?" Shepard said, embarrassed even though it had never happened.

"Mmhmm. So were Garrus and Tali, though they didn't tease you quite so much." She kissed Shepard softly. "It was very endearing. No go, you have work to do." She slapped the back of Shepard's thigh, gave her another kiss, and watched her go. "Oh," she shouted just as the door began to close, "And we're going to Sur'Kesh. I just cleared it."

* * *

Liara paced uncomfortably in Shepard's quarters three days later, glancing occasionally at the empty fish tank, but mostly just watching her own feet. They were a little over two hours away from Sur'Kesh. A little blackmail had gone a long way with the salarians, and it hadn't taken much to get a 'tour' of their research station. It didn't hurt that Kirrahe had been beside himself, as much as a salarian could be anyway, to see them again.

"Never got a chance to thank Shepard properly," he'd told her when she'd been patched through to him to confirm the details of their arrival.

It wasn't convincing Mordin to cure the genophage that currently had Liara's stomach in knots, though. She was fairly certain he'd jump at the chance if it was phrased correctly.

No, it was Shepard that left the young asari wearing a hole in front of the bed. For one thing, the human had spent the last couple days just stopping by to say 'I love you' with that adorable little smirk of hers. It had been endearing the first three hundred times, but by the time the ship had finally left the docks, it was becoming a little much. Not that Liara didn't appreciate it, she did. It was more that she got the feeling that Shepard was doing it because she had to, not so much because she wanted to. That she felt she had to randomly show up and say it for no other reason than because she could. Liara didn't want to tell her to stop, she did actually like it most of the time, but at the same time she wanted to get across that it wasn't necessary. She knew Shepard loved her, anyone with eyes could tell, and part of her was afraid that if the Spectre kept it up the word would lose meaning.

Still that wouldn't normally have left her in this state. It was the nagging feeling she got whenever Shepard was around that had sent her to the top of the ship and away from her office. She had never lied outright to the former Alliance commander, but Benezia had been clear on one thing from the time Liara could talk. A lie of omission is still a lie, most especially when between family and friends. And lovers. She hadn't told Shepard about what had happened on Illium while the Spectre had been dead. It hadn't seemed important. Perhaps that first time, after touring the ship, she should have said something, but she had been just so grateful to have Shepard back and she hadn't wanted to ruin it. And then, when she'd seen her again they'd just come back from the other side of the relay, and Shepard had been so happy. Everyone had lived, the ship was in great shape, and it just hadn't seemed like the best opportunity, despite the inherent risks Liara knew she was playing with. And the last time Shepard had just destroyed a solar system, and Liara hadn't wanted to add more bad news onto Shepard's already sagging shoulders. Then the Reapers. It had just never been the right time.

She didn't have that excuse now. Shepard had more or less gotten over the 'theft' of the Normandy. She was just herself. Not overly happy, not depressed... just Shepard.

Only Liara wasn't sure how to break it to her. The information about how she'd discovered she was sick would lead to awkward questions. Questions she didn't want to answer. Questions about her fidelity, her love. While Liara was mostly certain that Shepard would just smile at her and say something along the lines of 'you go girl', Liara cherished her memories of that time, and was loathed to let Shepard know that.

"There you are," Shepard said, walking into the room. Liara looked up and smiled sickly. "You know, if you were trying to hide from me, coming up here was probably a bad choice."

"I was not attempting to hide, Shepard," Liara said, sitting down on the bed.

Shepard watched her silently for a moment before going a sitting beside her.

"Wanna talk about it?"

"Talk about what? I simply felt the need to get away before we arrive at Sur'Kesh. Convincing Mordin Solus to cure the genophage will not be an easy task."

"And his not listening to you has you so worried you've left teeth marks?" Shepard asked, reaching out and running her thumb over Liara's bottom lip. She was exaggerating a bit, but she could tell her lover had been worrying her lip between her teeth for what had probably been hours.

Liara stood, rubbing the ridges on the sides of her neck - they were a similar pressure point to the human temple, or so she'd been told. She had to tell her, if for no other reason than it was the right thing to do, and she had always prided herself on teaching her daughter to do the right thing. What sort of parent would she be if when she was given the chance to make up for a past mistake she didn't take it, but rather continued down a lie?

"No. There is something else."

"I figured," Shepard answered with a small laugh.

"I do not know exactly where to begin. It is not something I have spoken of freely, but you mean too much to me for me to keep secrets from you. I am not... that is I am...," she took a deep breath, and closed her eyes before meeting Shepard's intense gaze, "I am sick."

"I figured that much out myself."

"What? Please do not be flippant, Shepard."

"I'm not. You were hospitalized just under two years ago. Saw half a dozen doctors. Dunno what's wrong, but most people don't go to the doctor that often if everything's okay."

"You knew? And you said nothing?"

"I know better than to pry."

"And yet you dug up my private medical records and-"

"No, I didn't, Liara. Everything was available on a public search, for a Spectre, anyway," she grinned.

"But... why did you never say anything?" Shepard knew, she'd always known.

"I knew you'd tell me if I needed to know. And spying on your girlfriend, even one that makes you run all over Nos Astra hacking terminals despite a complete lack of technical expertise," Shepard said, ignoring Liara's indignant grunt, "isn't something you normally tell her about if you can help it. Especially if she becomes the Shadow Broker not long after. It obviously wasn't life threatening, you stopped seeing the doctors, and well, you lived another three hundred years...so, yeah. Didn't rank that high up on the 'Tell Liara' scale."

Liara stared at her for a long time, mouth working silently as she attempting to find some retort. She couldn't find anything, and eventually she let her shoulders sag and she sank down onto the sofa. She felt tears brimming behind her eyes, and wondered if she'd ever be able to go a full day without breaking down. She took a deep, shaky breath, and composed herself. Shepard knew she was sick, that was unexpected, certainly, but maybe it would make the rest of what she had to say easier.

"What I have is an unknown condition that effects certain asari-specific parts of my biotics." She looked up to meet Shepard's eyes, but there wasn't anything there to help her. Shepard was watching her closely, but there was no great outrage. Not that she expected any. Yet. "Are... You are aware of how melding works?"

Shepard grinned, "You've poked around in my head enough."

"Shepard," she warned. She didn't want to have to deal with Shepard's blithe tongue just now. "I am serious. This is serious." She got up from the couch, resuming the pacing Shepard had interrupted. "Whatever the intent of a meld, it begins the same way. The process my nervous system goes though just before we join during sex is identical to what it went through when I removed the information from the Eden Prime beacon."

"Not to question your own body, T'Soni, but I assure you, there is no comparison."

"I never said there was. It is much the same way that when you charge your biotics to put someone in stasis. As long as you don't commit to it you can instead send a singularity. I've seen you do it." Shepard was known for doing that as a trick, in fact. She'd charge her biotics, bring her hands down as if she was going to throw her opponent into a stasis field, and just as they're getting ready to avoid her, she'd make the subtle shifts in thought that changed her intention and instead threw the singularity to where her mark had run to in order to avoid her.

"Okay, but that's fairly normal. A biotic charge is a bit like an electrical one. Humans even require a grounding rod to use it. Which is why there were so many issues with the L2 implants, they attempted to ground the biotics back into the wearer's brain, rather than through a secondary medium," Shepard said, rubbing the small bump at the base of her skull that marked her implant. She'd been an L3 until just a few months ago, or perhaps until two years ago, she wasn't sure when Miranda had made the change. Cerberus had replaced the implant, which had been useless after her death, with one of the new L5s. A much smaller implant scar than she'd had before, and three times the raw biotic power. "Until it's directed, energy like that can become anything."

"Exactly," Liara said just a little wearily, "and the same is true for the meld. My biotics attune my brain to accept yours, once I am in contact I can then subtly shift my intentions. I can extract your memories, or give you mine. We can share feelings. Or I can begin the joining. Or I should be able to."

Shepard raised an eyebrow, she heard what Liara was saying, but just the night before she'd had ample proof that Liara had no issues with anything they normally did in the bedroom. However, "This is why that friend of yours moved out."

Liara almost tripped she stopped pacing so quickly, eyes wide as she stared at Shepard, "Wh-what?"

"On Illium. You were seeing some asari or something. I dug up that information and I spent the next two days trying to figure out how to tell her I was sorry for kissing you," Shepard said with a laugh, "but then, well, after everything I figured things hadn't worked out. This is why isn't it?"

"I was never unfaithful, Shepard." True, on it's surface. "I couldn't be," she added. If she was going to be truthful today, she might as well go all the way with it. "When Teiron-"

"Is that her name? Why didn't you find her when you got better?"

"Yes, that was her name. And I love you, Shepard."

"I was dead."

"I still loved you. She was...," Liara didn't want to say she was a mistake, it hadn't been a mistake. "She wasn't you."

"I'm not going to complain." Shepard smiled, her eyes shining back full of love and lust and perhaps just a little bit of pity that Liara steadfastly ignored.

"The point is, this whatever it is that I have, it prevents me from starting the joining. I lose my connection with my biotics when I try. It's an unpleasant experience."

"I'd imagine," Shepard said, reaching out a hand and pulling Liara down into her lap, "But why don't we have, er, issues?"

"I'm not sure, Shepard. The best asari doctors don't know what I have. The night I was taken to the hospital, Teiron attempted to..." Liara waved a hand vaguely. She wasn't as uptight about sex as she'd been the night she'd walked into Shepard's quarters on the original Normandy, but she wasn't about to give Shepard a play by play of what had happened that night. "...and I stopped breathing."

"Shit."

Liara laughed, "Yes, that is a fairly good description of what I thought when I woke up. Teiron stayed for awhile, we tried to find what was wrong. The doctors had no idea what it was. I still don't know, or how it could effect you."

Shepard kissed her gently, then leaned her forehead against hers. "But you're better now."

"No. Not, exactly. It's difficult to explain, but I am not better. After you died, again, well, it, I had similar difficulties."

"Then we'll find a cure. Whatever it is, I'll make you better. I promise."

"That's not what I was looking for when I told you this. I... Perhaps I have one other small confession. I can feel you. With enough concentration I can pinpoint exactly where you are. There are times when I know what you are feeling. I knew the moment you woke up after Cerberus rebuilt you."

"That's... I don't know if that's romantic or creepy."

"Creepy," Liara confirmed, leaning her head down on Shepard's shoulder, "but it means I don't think that this has a cure. I don't know what it means, but...," she took a deep breath, nuzzling Shepard's neck, "Teiron described the rejection as knives in her brain. I don't want to put you through that."

Shepard nodded silently. She didn't answer, unsure of how she felt about all this. She knew that she should feel bad for Liara. That the life she had led because of this wasn't the life Shepard would have wanted for her. And yet, part of her was just happy that this hadn't interfered with them, just the relationship Liara had attempted to have before. As if her illness had picked her out as 'okay'. She felt Liara wrap her arms around her waist, and despite knowing they were less than an hour from Sur'Kesh, Shepard thought maybe she should test that theory.

* * *

Liara shifted slightly on the sofa in the lounge, and tucked her feet up underneath her. She glanced out the window, seeing the curve of Sur'Kesh through the window as they sat in high orbit around the planet.

It had been two weeks since they had arrived at the salarian home world. It had taken a week for Mordin to join them at the base, three days of bribery and threats to get the salarians to release the three remaining living Krogan. Two additional days had been taken up with the politics of the whole affair, and she'd just been able to contact Feron the day before.

He'd be coming by to pick up Dr. Solus, Padok Wiks, and the krogran females and take them to Tuchanka. While Shepard had been playing nice with the Salarian Delatrasses Liara had been in talks with Wrex and the leader of the female clans. They agreed to keep Mordin's work under wraps and to allow the two salarian doctors onto the planet, after only eighteen hours of argument. A quarter of the time it had taken her to get the salarians to allow the doctors to leave in the first place.

At least now she didn't have to worry about it. Feron would be there the next day, and they'd be loaded up with the raw minerals she'd happened to barter out of the hands of the most stubborn of the opponents. She wasn't one to normally add insult to injury when it came to negotiations, especially not after her work with the Alliance, but something about these salarians just rubbed her the wrong way. Maybe it was that she hadn't spent much time around the species recently. Though the STG had sided with Shepard, and in the end to salarians had helped a little, they'd always hold a bitter, cold place in her heart for not seeing the good Shepard had done by helping the Krogan. And it had nothing to do with the fact that Wrex had always been nice to her. Nothing at all.

She glanced up from the datapad she was currently reading – a report on Cerberus activity around Omega – and saw the other thing that had kept her attention for the last two weeks.

When Shepard had been given the Normandy back from the council, it had a crew of slightly over 36 people, of which just under half were Alliance soldiers as an offer of peace for grabbing the ship out from under them. The remainder were made up of various members of the council races. Dr. Chakwas even had a new salarian assistant, a fact the doctor found amusing as the man was just over fifteen, but already had his doctorate. Though most of the council supplied crew were turians, being mostly familiar with the design of a ship based on their own, there were slightly more than half a dozen asari on board.

Of which one was Nillye's mother.

She'd run into the maiden on her way down from Shepard's cabin when they'd first arrived at Sur'Kesh. She had been sitting in the mess when Liara had walked by to grab the jacket she'd left in her office. Of course, the older woman hadn't recognized her, they wouldn't meet for a few centuries, but Liara had had the same reaction she did every time she saw her daughter's mother-in-law anymore.

She'd run.

She had grabbed the reinforced jacket from the back of her chair, slipped past the indigo skinned woman, and made it down to the shuttle bay as fast as she could. It wasn't that Amerra K'Lari was a bad woman, or obviously mean. Or that she disliked Liara on anything more than principle because she was the mother of the girl her daughter had bonded against her approval. In fact, as asari went, she'd kept her remarks about Liara's parentage and career quite tame. Probably as a favor to her daughter, who was madly in love with another asari, and the daughter of Commander Shepard to boot. But, as far as Liara could remember, they had never been able to be in the same room for long before one or the other of them started throwing singularities or warp fields.

They just really couldn't stand each other.

When she'd told Shepard, in the hopes of having the former-commando-turned-engineer traded out for someone Liara didn't have quite a strong reaction to, the entire thing had backfired.

She should have known better than to ask just after finding out that her memory of the situation on Sur'Kesh was faulty and that Mordin had not yet arrived and they would be stuck in orbit for an unspecified amount of time. She should have waited, let everything die down; wait until they were far away, and hopefully somewhere near the Citadel. She should have done a lot of things.

In the end, Shepard had lit up like the last view of Earth's sky Liara had had before Illira had tossed her unceremoniously into the past, and gone down to make friends with 'the future mother of her future daughter's bondmate'. No amount of explaining that the likelihood of Nillye even being born now was slim had done nothing to quell Shepard's desire to meet the asari. At least Shepard hadn't told Amerra why she suddenly wanted to be friends. For that at least, Liara was thankful.

Right now, Shepard, Amerra and Williams were playing five card stud at the table in the corner. Shepard looked to be losing badly, but Liara had hope that Williams would put Amerra in her place.

She scowled at the game, then went back to reading her datapad. She debated on whether or not to warn Aria about the upcoming attack. She owed the Queen of Omega a great deal, but there had been something strangely satisfying about seeing the woman stuck on a place like the Citadel.

"Liara, join us!" Shepard called while Liara still hovered over forwarding the information.

"You have asked me to join you six times in the last hour, my desire to not lose credits to you has not changed since the last time you asked."

"Don't worry, I won't let her be too rough with you," Ashley said with a laugh.

"You assume I wouldn't like it that way," Liara deadpanned, enjoying the sound of Shepard and Ashley both choking on their drinks. She could feel Amerra's eyes on her, but she resisted looking up to meet them.

The worst part about all this was that the woman was really friendly. There were few asari that did not know of the Matron Benezia T'Soni, who had risked her entire career to bare a pureblood daughter. Fewer still who didn't know of Matriarch Benezia who had betrayed her people and the galaxy to ally with Saren, never mind that she had been indoctrinated and had been trying to help. No one knew anything about_ that_. And while Liara's personal notoriety was often overshadowed by the presence that had been her mother, the vids of the aftermath of the Battle of the Citadel clearly showed her being helped out of the remains of the citadel tower. She never expected a warm welcome from other asari, except perhaps Aria, who's idea of a warm welcome was not killing you on sight. She expected even less from Amerra, but instead found the woman to be not only accepting of her past, but downright pleasant.

She hated it.

She had liked disliking the woman. She had liked the games they had played of being the better 'in-law', especially since she had a tendency to win, despite her rocky relationship with Illira. She did not like that the woman was not the catty bitch that had been at Illira's bonding ceremony talking about her long turian heritage on her father's side before looking sweetly at Liara and asking who her father was.

As if she wasn't aware.

She hit send on the report, letting Aria have her heads up. For some reason helping the criminal felt like she was hurting Amerra, even though the woman had probably never met the ruler of Omega.

She glanced up, and found Shepard smiling at her. Strange to think that the last time she'd been on-board, if she'd risen to Ashley's bait as she'd just done, Shepard would have been blushing and apologizing. She liked the change. She liked this Shepard, so reminiscent of the Shepard that had saved her from the geth. One not carrying the burden of all the people of the galaxy. This Shepard felt like she was winning, and liked it. And Liara figured that could make up a little for the fact that Nillye's mother was actually friendly.

She tossed the datapad on the sofa, after making sure it was off and locked, and made her way to the table. Ash grinned at her, and pointed at a chair leaning against the outer bulkhead. Liara grabbed it and set herself between Amerra and Shepard, forcing a smile at the asari. The woman had no idea why Liara was so standoffish, and Liara was attempting to reign in six years of dislike, but it was difficult.

Shepard grabbed the seat of the chair and drug it closer to her, wrapping her arm around Liara's shoulders.

"Good, now you can help me win some of this back."

"You wanted me over here to help you cheat? I do not do such things, Shepard."

Ashley laughed, "You are such a sore loser, Commander."

Shepard glared at Ashley, said, "It's just Shepard," and snagged the deck away. "It's my deal anyway."

"So, Dr. T'Soni, I heard you spent a few years on Illium. I grew up there, along the equator, no where near Nos Astra. It is a beautiful planet though, isn't it?" Amerra asked.

"Very," Liara said, leaning her head against Shepard's shoulder and watching as Shepard dealt the cards, "Though I must say, it does not hold a candle to Thessia."

"I have never actually been to the home-world," Amerra confessed, much to Liara's confusion. The Amerra she would meet had gone on and on about how she had worked on Thessia.

"Never? I find that surprising," Liara answered.

Amerra didn't answer until the first round of betting was over, "No. I was supposed to go there when I heard the Council was looking for a crew for the Normandy, and not a full human crew, either. I jumped at the chance, turned down the offer to come here. This is the first time the core crew of a ship has been run by multiple species. Certain key personnel on other ships have been picked from races other than the ones holding the ships original contract, but this is the first time there have been non-specialists of various races. It's an interesting experience. The more so because it is run by a Spectre."

Liara felt a surge of protectiveness, but when she met the other asari's eyes, they were not on Commander Shepard, but on her cards. And nothing in her tone suggested anything other than a respect for the Special Tactics and Reconnaissance branch of the council. Liara sighed, stopped Shepard from betting on the current hand, and resigned herself to having discovered she actually liked Illira's future mother in law.

Now, if only she could use that information to get along with her own.


	7. Chapter 7

**A slightly (read: much) shorter chapter as I try to work through the next one. Hannah Shepard is not easy to write. At all. Anyway, it might be a bit before the next chapter is up while I work through getting her to do what I tell her and not go on a small rampage on the new Turian crew of the Normandy. That said, I'm also considering writing a small piece about both of Shepard's funerals, along the lines of 'A Lucky Woman', either from Hannah's or Liara's POV. I don't have anything but basic notes on them now, but if you want to see them, I might just write them (I might anyway, to try and jumpstart Hannah Shepard into cooperating). And after that stupidly long Authors Note: Chapter 7.**

* * *

Half an hour later, Shepard had made a minor comeback, but not enough to quell the oncoming force of both Amerra and Williams.

"I don't know why you continue to play against me, Commander. I always win."

"I always win..."

"I always win, ma'am."

"And it's just Shepard," the Spectre amended, collecting her cards from the table and throwing them into the pile in front of Ashley.

"Com- I mean, uh... Spectre? Shepard? Whatever. There's a message coming through for you from Admiral Hackett." Joker's voice cut through the banter.

"I'll be there in a minute," Shepard said, standing. "Liara, make 'em pay." For half a second Liara thought Shepard was going to kiss her, and for twice as long Shepard considered doing so, but she settled for squeezing her hand, and casting a dark look at Williams. The other human laughed, and dealt Liara into the next hand.

Shepard made her way back up to the CIC, and then to the comm room. They had pulled the conference table out, and Traynor had mentioned they'd been in the process of upgrading to the newest version of the Quantum Entanglement Communicators. She'd also mentioned, while she and the Spectre had been discussing the finer points of quantum mechanics, that they'd been in the process of moving the whole system from its original location and setting up a command center. For the moment, though, communications were still where it had been when she'd contacted the Illusive Man just sans the, she often thought impressive, sinking table, though most of the updates had been completed. They could contact Earth, for instance. She stepped into the scanner, and smiled as Hackett appeared before her.

"Sir," she said, saluting out of habit, "you wanted to speak with me."

Hackett didn't return the salute, but nodded, "Yes. I've heard reports that Dr. T'Soni has acquired some building materials for our current project."

"Yes. They'll be loaded up in the next thirty hours, and we should be at the project base within the next three days. It's mostly raw ore, from what I understand, though she has some electrical work ups from a salarian science team that she believes will be useful."

"Right. About that. I've been doing what I could, and I know Anderson's been at the Alliance Council for days, but unfortunately, there is a still an arrest-on-sight order for you within Alliance Space."

"Ah," Shepard answered, shoulders sagging, "and I take that to mean that you are building the device inside Alliance space." She'd known about the order for over a week now, but hearing that the organization that she had pledged her life to, that her parents had, that her father had given his life for, was seeking her arrest was not something she cherished. Even if she knew that it was the only option they had available, considering the nature of her departure.

"Exactly. I'm not about to turn away help, but you showing up here might just make an intergalactic scene, and I'm sure we've both had enough of those to last us a few years."

"That's an understatement, sir. I'll head to the Citadel, send the team on without me. I have things I need to do there anyway."

"That is a possibility, however, I might have a better suggestion." His tone said that by suggestion, he meant order.

"Sir?"

Hackett frowned, and picked a datapad up from a table she couldn't see. He read over it for a minute, then nodded and looked back up at her. "The _Orizaba_ isn't far from your location. I've already talked to them, and they've agreed to handle the transfer of your cargo. They've also agreed to ignore your arrest warrant."

"How did you convince my mother of that?" Shepard laughed, "Last I heard from her, she was more than a little upset with me. Something about not telling her I was alive."

Hackett smiled, "It was fairly easy, actually. I can pull rank with her."

Shepard chuckled, and shook her head. "Send us the coordinates and as soon as everything is cleared here, we'll head that way. And tell Anderson not to be too hard on anyone, it's strangely liberating to not be beholden to the Alliance." She'd have liked to have her dress blues back in the closet, and she missed the comforting weight of her dog tags around her neck – she'd even settle for the ones Cerberus had issued her – but none of that was worth Anderson getting in trouble of her behalf.

"You're still human, Shepard," Hackett warned.

"Yes, sir. But then, so's Cerberus."

"Point taken, Shepard. Hackett out."

The connection ended, and Shepard stared at her own feet for a moment. She was on good terms with her mother, but she suddenly felt like she was fifteen again and had failed her history test. She had a feeling she was in for one hell of a lecture.

* * *

Liara sighed, stretching as she walked off the elevator. After Shepard had left, she'd proceeded to win back most of what Shepard had lost before Glyph had paged her with a message from Feron. The rest of her afternoon had been spent in her office, and she thought she should probably be there still. Between arranging things for Feron and dealing with her spies on Omega – who reported that Aria had not taken the news of Cerberus' planned attack well – she was finally remembering why she'd been secretly glad that the comm buoy's destruction had eliminated her access to her galactic network after the war. She was fairly sure she'd have ended up a quivering pile of goo had she needed to handle her job as the Shadow Broker and the stress of being a new, single, mother at the same time. It was hard enough now balancing what she needed to do, and what she wanted. Need had taken precedence before, when time had been their enemy. It wasn't exactly their friend now, but she only felt a tiny pull to return to her office and continue working.

And it was easy enough to ignore.

She slipped into the loft, shrugging out of her lab coat as she did. She wasn't sure why she wore it on-board, it wasn't as if she was suddenly going to discover some hidden Prothean ruins in the cargo hold, but she felt strangely under-dressed if she walked around in her shirt sleeves.

She could hear the shower running, and briefly considered joining Shepard, but the hot water, a highly controlled commodity on the ship, tended to run out when she did. She hung the coat up, then started picking up Shepard's clothes where they had been discarded around the room. Shepard was fairly good about cleaning up after herself eventually, but Liara had found that the eternal tidy state of this room that she remembered had been an illusion. Shepard only cleaned up if she was expecting company or when she left for the day. Liara had stopped being 'company' over a week ago.

She dropped Shepard's clothes into the hamper, and quickly stripped herself and tossed her own clothes in with them. She glanced at the chronometer on the bedside table, it was technically tomorrow, threw on her nightclothes and climbed into bed. She pulled a datapad from the pile of them on her bedside table and went back to work. She had forgotten how much her life had revolved around stolen moments with Shepard, being shot at, and work, before. Now, she had yet to be shot at, and she hardly felt like her time with Shepard was stolen anymore, but work still took up most of her time. Even her downtime. Even when she should be sleeping.

She wasn't sure how long she'd been sitting there when Shepard finally walked out of the bathroom. Wasn't really sure how long the shower had been off, she just suddenly felt the weight of Shepard's gaze on her. She felt the warm hum in the base of her neck that she always associated with Shepard. Her spine seemed to resonate much like it did when they joined whenever Shepard was thinking of her, or was moving towards her. It had bugged her, during the war the first time, but it had been like losing a limb when Shepard had died. She'd known, as she raced to the field hospital on the battlefield, the moment Shepard's heart had stopped beating. She savored the feeling now, even if she didn't focus too much on it. When she did, she could feel Shepard's presence, her relative position to herself, and that felt a bit like an invasion of privacy.

She looked up from her datapad, a smile tugging at her lips. Shepard was leaning against the bathroom door frame, sporting a fluffy white towel, her wet hair plastered to her face. She smiled back, but Liara caught a tension in it that didn't fit the relaxed pose she held.

"I truly think that you'd get your way more often if you went around dressed like that," Liara teased.

Shepard glanced down at her towel clad form and some of the tension in her smile faded, "You're probably right. The press would certainly eat it up."

"Mmn, good thing you don't then, I have a tendency to get jealous."

Shepard chuckled, and after digging through the clothes Liara had just cleaned up, grabbed the t-shirt she'd discarded before her shower. Liara wrinkled her nose in disgust, and Shepard traded it out for a clean one with a sigh. "Just because you've been able to toss clean clothes into the laundry for the last three centuries doesn't mean the rest of us have had the luxury. That shirt was perfectly clean until you threw it in there. I haven't done anything today." She walked around to where Liara was laying, and sat down beside her, picking up the chronometer. A few deft taps and the date and time it displayed were replaced with a yearly calendar. A large red line cut through a week about three months into the future. It surprised Liara to see how much time had actually passed since she'd been on the beach with her daughter. Time seemed to be slipping away much too fast.

The only saving grace, really, was that the Crucible was moving along quickly. She'd received word that actual construction had started a little over nine days before, and that things were moving along steadily, if not as quickly as they'd hoped. Hackett gave an estimated time of completion at about five months, assuming nothing happened. Part of what Liara had been doing all afternoon was finding teams to speed up the process. As Shepard's calendar showed, they didn't have five months. If things followed what she remembered, Earth would be hit in just over twelve weeks. They'd had the weapon up and running in just under fifteen weeks the last time, and Liara was doing her best to beat that time. She'd sent a team to extract the Cerberus scientists, after giving an overexcited Traynor a push to search for them. She'd written to Garrus, who was doing what he could to get the Turians to send support to Hackett, and apparently trying to find a way to meet up with the ship. She expected he'd be waiting, bags in hand, the next time they docked at the Citadel.

She, additionally, had a little over a dozen teams, which she'd pulled from various positions around the galaxy, hunting for the various relics Shepard had spent much too much of her time searching for during the war. Though she didn't know their locations, she had enough ships that doing a systematic search would find most things. Made all the easier because the ships wouldn't have to dodge invading Reapers as the Normandy had had to do.

Shepard made a quick note on the device a few days into the future, then returned it to the bedside table.

"What was that?" Liara asked, putting the datapad down beside it.

"Hackett wants us to hand over our future cargo to the _Orizaba. _We're to meet them at the relay in the Arcturus system. With the Normandy stealth systems would should be able to get in and out without Parliament realizing their most wanted is hanging out right under their noses."

"I'm not sure I'm following. I thought we were heading to the construction site."

Shepard moved to the other side of the bed and slipped under the blankets. "That was the plan, but apparently we do that and Hackett can't keep them from arresting me. And then you'd be angry, and that's kind of scary," Shepard grinned at Liara's offended look and kissed her, "Anyway, Mom said she'd ignore the fact that the Alliance wants me in a cell now. We're supposed to rendezvous in two days. If everything goes well on this end anyway."

Liara stared at Shepard, a million things going through her head, none of them terribly good. She had met Hannah Shepard twice, both times right after Shepard had died. The first time had been at Shepard's funeral, and the then captain and XO of the Kilimanjaro had made it very clear she did not approve of her daughter's relationship with Liara. While Liara had done her utmost to not be sick all over the empty coffin, thinking only of the pile of skin and muscle that had once been Commander Shepard she had dropped off at a Cerberus lab, Hannah Shepard had accused the asari of all sorts of things most people wouldn't repeat in polite company. Liara hadn't even been sure some of what Captain Shepard had suggested she had done with the woman's daughter was even physically possible. She had, as Liara had been led away by Garrus, told the broken asari that her daughter's death had been Liara's fault. It was the only time that day Liara had cried, because it touched so closely on how she felt.

The second time had been significantly worse. Three weeks pregnant, bruised, battered, and worn down, Liara had met Hannah Shepard at the makeshift Alliance Headquarters in London. Shepard was to have a very public funeral the following day, followed by a small private ceremony for the few people on Earth who had known the Commander best. She'd walked into the tent to be assaulted by the now-Rear Admiral Shepard. Apparently, the woman had just been informed of her daughter's bonding to Liara, and had some more few choice words to say. In an attempt to ease the woman's suffering, Liara had made the mistake of mentioning the child she had just the day before disovered she was carrying. Shepard had been dead for a fortnight, and Liara had hoped that she and her mother-in-law would be able to make peace with the child that would be Illira.

Instead, Hannah Shepard had called Liara a whore in front of the assembled Admirals, and promised to fight against Liara getting any of Shepard's death benefits. She'd partly succeeded, but Liara hadn't really cared.

Illira never met her grandmother.

Liara was never really all that upset about that fact.

She knew, of course, that her meetings with the older human had been at emotional times for her. That, from Shepard's stories, her mother was decent woman who had poured herself into her daughter and her career. She had been the sole provider for the young Shepard since her father had died during the First Contact War when Shepard was only three, and had never had anything but her daughter's best interests in heart.

Liara could respect that. She'd been there. She couldn't remember the number of humans Illira had brought home over the years. Most barely old enough to be considered at the age of consent. Young men who had leered at both mother and daughter, young woman who were very clearly only in it for a thrill. Liara had never been happier than when she'd received the invitation from Illira about her bonding ceremony with Nillye. At least Nillye she had liked. She couldn't imagine what she would feel if she'd met one of those suitors for the first time just after losing Illira – even Nillye who she often thought of as her own daughter.

But just because she understood, didn't mean she was looking forward to meeting Hannah Shepard again. Even if Shepard would be with her this time.

Unlike Amerra, who she had disliked from the first time she met her, she didn't hate Rear Admiral – or was she still Captain now?- Shepard. She respected her, understood her, and had done her best to be nice to her. She knew why Hannah Shepard didn't like her, and was more than willing to accept that hatred as just part of being with the older woman's daughter. If what she remembered at the tirade at Shepard's first funeral was true, the older Shepard had always planned on her daughter settling down with a nice boy at some point and raising a family. Either while still with the Alliance or not. And Liara, according to her future mother-in-law, was not a nice boy.

"Oh," was all she managed to say in response, though.

Shepard gave her a searching look. "Not the reaction I expected to my telling you it was time to meet the parents. Oh, wait, you've probably already met her, huh? Let me guess, she showed you all those embarrassing baby pictures she has of me. And the world's worst prom picture."

"I've met her yes. But I have never seen any of the images she might have of your childhood." Liara scooted down under the blankets and rolled over. She didn't want to talk about it. She didn't want to think about it. She would just hide in her office until Hannah Shepard was gone, maybe ask Amerra to share a few drinks in the lounge, because that rated as a much better plan than spending time with the elder Shepard. She was fairly certain that she could avoid Shepard's mother, even if it meant having to avoid Shepard for a few days.

"Oh, no you don't, Liara T'Soni," Shepard said, tugging on her lover's shoulder and rolling her back over, "I want to know what's wrong, and I want to know now. So come on, what did my mother do?"

"I'd rather not talk about it. She is your mother. You were kind enough to allow me to stay silent about my own mother, and I'd appreciate the same in regards to yours."

"I didn't let you not talk about Benezia, if I remember correctly. I kept showing up in the med bay with various different Alliance rations in an attempt to get you to talk."

Liara humphed, and didn't answer. She didn't like to think about the day, and the days that followed, her mother dying. She chose to think of her mother as she'd been when Liara had been young. But if she really thought about it, she could remember the frustration she felt when Shepard would just show up, MRE in hand, a smile on her face, and a question about Liara growing up. But she had never asked about the Benezia they had met on Noveria. She never asked questions of what her mother was doing with Saren.

"Liara." Shepard drug her name across her lips, enunciating each syllable. Her name was a warning, a small chastisement.

"Goddess, fine," Liara sighed, lifting her head and letting it slam back into the pillow. It had been four hundred years since she'd last thrown a temper tantrum, but she felt close to it now. "Yes, I met your mother. It was at your funeral, and she was upset. I do not think that given those events she would like to see me."

"But... that hasn't happened yet," Shepard said with a smile.

"The first time you died, Shepard."

"Right. I had a funeral? Man, I wish I'd been invited."

"It was a long time ago."

"Two years. Not that long, really. She hasn't forgotten that I didn't tell her I wasn't dead. The fact that I was is classified, apparently."

Liara stared up at the stars flying past above her, not sure what to say. She hadn't seen Hannah Shepard since the end of the war. "I suppose it is not. I will stay out of your way when we meet up with the _Orizaba_. I do not wish to cause a scene."

Shepard leaned over and kissed her again, "No."

"Please, Shepard. Do not argue with me over this. I admit, Amerra is very sweet when she is not being overprotective of Nillye, and I know your mother is a good person. But she does not like me, and I am okay with that."

"Bullshit. I won't let her do this."

"Shepard..."

"No. Liara, once she gets to know you, she'll love you. I do. No one can meet you and not. You're too cute," Shepard said with a grin. Liara rolled her eyes. "I'm going to talk to her, and then the three of us are going to have dinner. And if she isn't pleasant, I promise that you can throw a singularity or something."

"Shepard! She is your mother!"

Shepard chuckled, "Exactly." She kissed Liara's forehead, stretched, then wrapped herself around the asari before falling asleep.

* * *

Hannah Shepard had been with the Alliance for longer than she really cared to remember. She'd married Jack Shepard at the tender age of 19, and together they had wreaked havoc on various ships and bases. And then, in a glorious moment of pain and sweat and screaming they had had a baby girl, a beautiful baby girl. For three years, their little family had been perfect. And then Jack had died in the First Contact War. Hannah had tried to take as much leave as possible afterward, but for the most part she'd raised her daughter on various ships and starports, sending the young Shepard to spend her school months with various relatives back on Earth.

Her daughter had always said she'd grown up on military ships, and while that wasn't technically true, her mother had always liked the idea. She'd always thought Shepards were meant to live in the stars. Her daughter's closest friends had been soldiers of one kind of another. Few Alliance vessels had children on them, but that had never stopped what the crews of those ships called 'The Littlest Shepard' from befriending every person from the lowliest ensign on up.

The accident that had left her daughter a swirling mass of biotic power had changed things. Hannah had sent her fourteen year old daughter away, had sent her to boarding school, and hardly even seeing her on school breaks. She just hadn't been able to handle the thought of losing the rest of her family.

But there had never been prouder parent than Hannah Shepard when her daughter had become the first human Spectre.

Then things had gone down hill.

First, the letter from her daughter, telling her all about some asari she'd apparently fallen in love with. It wasn't that Hannah Shepard had anything against her daughter dating a woman... thing... whatever an asari was. Sure, she'd always expected to have a strapping Alliance soldier as a son-in-law, and a couple or three grandchildren, but if her baby wanted to date a girl she wasn't going to stop her. It was a bit hard to get over the fact that she was blue, though. Not that it mattered, Hannah thought. No, whatever made her happy.

Then, finding out her daughter was dead, that had been almost more than she could handle. And the group that had shown up for the funeral. A Krogan and Quarian. That damned Asari. And a Turian. A fucking Turian. Like they hadn't blown her husband away, his ship exploding much like she thought her daughter's had. That creature had no right to be there. She'd snapped when he'd seen her trying to comfort the asari. The asari and the granddaughter of that miserable-excuse-for-a-human-being Williams were talking, the Williams kid crying, the asari looking like she was going to be sick. And the Turian.. he was patting them on the back, acting like he gave a damn.

Perhaps she shouldn't have said some of the things she had to the asari. She probably shouldn't have said any of the things she'd said to the asari. Apparently her daughter had loved the alien, and she could, perhaps, have found someone to confide in with her.

But she'd been blue.

The last few months had thrown her into a loop. Finding out fourth hand that her daughter was alive, hearing her daughter had gone through the Omega-4 relay (she wasn't sure whether it upset her more that she'd been working for Cerberus, that she'd gone through the relay, or that she'd simply been in the Terminus Systems to begin with), and then the whole thing with the Batarians.

She couldn't say she felt all that bad about a solar system full of slavers, but her daughter obviously did, because she'd turned herself in. They'd exchanged a few messages, sent through proper channels, nothing more that polite conversation though. So when Hackett had contacted her, told her about her daughter's run from Earth, and the warrant the Alliance had out on her head, she'd jumped at the chance to see her baby again. Alive, and well, and hopefully asari free.

She watched the Normandy come through the relay, and smiled to herself as she noticed that the ship's scanners didn't pick the ship up.

"Lieutenant, bring us around to the edge of the system. Radio the Normandy, I'd like to go see my daughter."


	8. Chapter 8

Shepard stood at the airlock, watching through the side porthole as the larger ship came along side. She'd been unable to find Liara that morning, the asari had slipped out of bed without waking her and had played a game of cat and mouse with her all morning. Only a great deal of respect had kept her from asking EDI to find the damned Prothean expert and demand she show herself. If Liara wanted to play games now, fine, but she would smooth things out between her lover and her mother if it was the last thing she did.

She rocked back on her heals, then pushed herself up on her toes, hands clasped behind her back. She heard the outer airlock door open, and EDI go through her decontamination spiel. Shepard stood up a little straighter, and unconsciously tried to straighten her hair. She couldn't remember the last time she'd seen her mother, and the commanding presence she prided herself on was nothing compared to that of her progenitor. There was a reason she'd been so well behaved as a child, and it had everything to do with that small, disapproving look her mother had perfected during Shepard's childhood.

The airlock door opened, and Captain Hannah Shepard stood there, frowning slightly as she took in the ship, and then her daughter.

"Sweetheart! It's been much too long," Captain Shepard said, coming on board. "So this is the infamous Normandy. I heard you went to a lot of trouble to get this."

"Hey, Mom. I didn't do much of anything really. Stood around looking innocent in handcuffs for the most part. Liara handled most of it."

Captain Shepard's face fell, and her daughter tried to see something other than what was written there.

"So, your, uh, asari friend is here, I take it. That's nice. Why don't you show me what you've got for us, my crew," she waved a hand at the group of people that had boarded with her, "will begin the process of – What the hell!"

They'd walked out onto the main deck of the CIC, and Hannah had stopped dead. A few human crew members, including Specialist Traynor, were milling around, but the majority of the crew currently on duty ware Turian. A single asari sat at one of the nav stations. Shepard watched the color in her mother's face drain away, and glanced between her crew and her mother, confused.

"What? Is something wrong?"

"Wh- what are they doing here?" Shepard watched as her mother's hand twitched toward the sidearm she wasn't carrying, and looked around the CIC for whatever it was that had her mother so jumpy.

"What are who doing here? This is my crew. The best the council has to offer. Human, Asari, Salarian, Turian. These are the best of the best, hand picked. From a computer generated list, but I still picked them all." Shepard squared her shoulders, proud of her crew, even if they hadn't been tested yet. Their records spoke for themselves, and if she was lucky, the Normandy wouldn't see any real action during this war. They were a scout ship for heaven's sake, not a front line dreadnaught.

Through clenched teeth, Hannah said, "You keep Turians on your crew?"

Shepard pursed her lips, confused, "Of course, Mom. They're actually a nice group of people when you get to know them."

"They killed your father!" she shouted, drawing looks from the crew. Traynor looked embarrassed, and suddenly remembered something she needed to do in the comm room, while the Turian crew cocked their heads and went back to work.

The truth hit Shepard suddenly, and she sighed, "No one on this ship was aboard the Ecnomus, mother. I wouldn't, you know I wouldn't do that." The Ecnomus had been the ship that had killed her father. She didn't talk about it, she didn't think about it. She liked Turians, on the whole. She did not hold them responsible for their actions during a war, anymore than she held herself responsible for lives she had taken in battle. Down those paths led madness. "And anyway, the oldest Turians on board couldn't have been more than eight during the war. They're fairly friendly."

Hannah twitched, her fingers flexing as she stared at a young Turian who flared his mandibles in what Shepard thought was a grin, but she figured her mother probably saw as an act of aggression.

It had never occurred to her that her mother might be prejudiced. Her earliest memories of her mother were of tolerance. She could remember lessons on kindness, on acceptance. Never once had her mother shown anything like she was right now. On the other hand, though, Shepard couldn't remember ever seeing her mother with an alien. She'd been almost a teenager the first time a ship her mother had been on had gone to the Citadel, and she'd been at an age where hanging around with her mother was the epitome of uncool.

She stared at her mother, seeing her, she thought, for perhaps the first time.

Her father had died at the hands of the Turians, and circumstance, and perhaps a bit of effort on the part of her mother, had kept Shepard in the dark about the issues her mother had been warring with.

Shepard felt a boiling anger at her mother, tinged with line of compassion.

"Come on," Shepard finally said, noticing the tension in her mother's pose, the desperate mania that she was trying so hard to keep down, "We'll head to the cargo bay, and we can get you a complete list of everything Liara gathered on Sur'Kesh." She held out a hand and led her mother to the elevator. The older woman didn't relax until the door had closed behind them.

They stepped off the elevator onto the cargo deck, and Shepard was glad to see only Vega standing by a workbench. Her mother was more relaxed, even if she hadn't said a word on the elevator. Vega gave mother and daughter a quick salute, then made his way off the deck. Shepard looked at the containers stacked in the center of the room, and realized that she had no idea what was in any of them. She glanced at her mother, briefly, ignoring the bile that boiled in her gut, and started looking for an inventory log.

"EDI," she finally called, when she closest thing she found has a report on the wear taken by the hydraulics, "Where is Liara? Would you please tell her to stop hiding? I need her help."

Hannah Shepard glanced at her daughter, while discussing the best way to get the large cargo crates onto the Orizaba with her crew.

"Dr. T'Soni is currently with me, Shepard. She is in the process of using a string of interesting asari expletives to prevent my revealing her location." There was a brief pause. "And she says it should be right in front of you."

"Liara! Stop hiding behind the med bay, I need your help. None of these boxes are labeled."

There was a long pause, and Shepard smiled at the mental image of Liara berating herself for not leaving the information where Shepard could find it.

"Fine, Shepard," Liara said over the comm, voice strained but resigned, "I'll be right there."

Hannah broke away from her crew and joined her daughter. "Is everything alright?"

"Fine, mom. Liara's just been very busy recently."

Hannah Shepard didn't answer, but leaned against the console. She watched her daughter carefully, noticing the hunch of her shoulders, the strain around her eyes, and tension in her arms. She regretted her outburst earlier. She was usually more controlled than that, but the sight of so many of...them...working around her daughter. Her only daughter. Her precious daughter. It had been too much.

Minutes passed, and a tense silence hung over the cargo bay. Hannah finally broke it, moving away from the console she was leaning on. "Well, Lieutenant Benson will be able to handle the transfer. If it's all the same I'll head back to my ship and prepare things over there, there is a lot that needs to be handled before we can finalize the transfer." It wasn't that she didn't want to meet her daughter's girlfriend, it was nothing like that, she convinced herself. There was just so much too do, and the Normandy couldn't stay in Alliance space for long.

Shepard nodded, only half listening to her mother. She was rethinking her plans for dinner. Liara had sounded stressed, and her mother obviously wanted nothing to do with her, but if she could just make her mom see how wonderful Liara really was, how much she loved her, then she knew that the two would get along.

The elevator dinged and opened, Liara walked off not even glancing at either of them. She rushed past them and over to the shuttle. Both Shepards watched her, Hannah with a look of shock, Shepard with confusion. She was back again before the elder Shepard took more than a single step toward the empty elevator. She shoved a data pad and an OSD at Shepard.

"The OSD has the reports from the Salarian research team. They should ease some of the difficulties the teams are having with feedback." She looked at her lover, glowering. "And next time, Shepard, look everywhere. Is there anything else?"

"Um...," Shepard started, not really sure what to make of Liara's small tirade, "Liara, this is my mother, Captain Hannah Shepard of the Orizaba. Mom, my bondmate, Dr. Liara T'Soni?"

"I was unaware you thought our relationship was in question, Shepard. Or is it my doctorate that you find questionable?"

"What? No, of course not. I just-" she cut herself off when she saw Liara's small smirk, and rolled her eyes. "Mom, Liara is a leading expert of Prothean archeology, and she discovered the plans the Alliance is currently using to build the anti-Reaper device."

"The Crucible," Liara corrected, "And we've met, I told you."

"Yes," Hannah Shepard answered coldly.

Shepard closed her eyes, and took a deep breath. They just needed to get to know each other. "Look, there's a lot to get done."

"I just said that," her mother interrupted.

"There is a lot to get done," Shepard repeated, handing the information Liara had given her to her mother, "but once things start moving, why don't we all have dinner up in my cabin. After you get the full tour, of course, mom."

Liara remained silent, she'd already agreed to this, against her better judgment. Hannah glanced between her daughter and the asari before finally nodding, "Fine, sweetie. Whatever you want," she said with a sigh.

Hours later Liara watched Shepard rearrange the plates on the table in front of the sofa for the third time. She smoothed the creases in her dress, attempting to catch sight of her reflection in the glass of the fish tank. Her eyes darted to the open door of Shepard's cabin, her nerves on fire as she waited for the telltale ding of the elevator. She wasn't sure what had prompted her to agree to this. She was fairly certain that she'd have more fun allowing Dr. Chakwas and her new assistant poke her with large needles. And she hated needles. In the glass of the fish tank she watched Shepard stand up again and come up behind her. Strong arms wrapped around her middle, and Shepard rested her head on her shoulder.

"You okay?" she asked, planting a soft kiss in the hollow where neck met shoulder.

Liara turned in the spectre's arms, and nodded. "Of course. Though I am more than willing to go eat dinner with the crew so you can have this time with your mother. I know it has been a long time since you've seen her, and I'd hate to get in the middle."

"Don't be silly," Shepard said with a smile, "Tonight is so you and my mom can get to know each other. I'm finding she's a bit rougher around the edges than I remember, but I already told you. No one can not like you."

"I'd like to see your evidence," Liara answered, her mouth twitching into the ghost of a smile. "But, honestly, Shepard. I think your mother would be more comfortable if I wasn't here. I really don't mind, I don't want to cause problems."

Shepard stared at her, trying to convey with a look how there was nothing she could do with regards to Hannah Shepard that would ever be considered a problem. Tried to get across that if it came down to it, as much as she loved her mother, there really wasn't a question of which ties she would cut, and Liara wasn't going anywhere, thank you very much. The bright blue eyes that looked back at her, though, held so much hurt, and fear, and guilt, she knew it wasn't getting through.

She dipped her head and kissed her instead. It was slow, exploratory. Shepard's only thought was to put as much of her love into it as she could, to make Liara understand how much she meant to her. Her hands danced along the asari's back, playing with the row of buttons that climbed the back of the dress. She felt Liara's hand clutching at her shirt, gripping and releasing. She felt herself melt into the kiss, letting one hand trail up to Liara's crest, her fingers playing along its edge. Liara shuddered in her arms, drawing her closer.

"I'm not interrupting anything, am I?" Hannah Shepard asked as she stepped through the open door.

Liara tried to jump away, but Shepard still held her tight around the waist with one arm. She ducked her head, instead, unwilling to meet the disapproving look she knew was in the elder Shepard's eyes. She felt Shepard plant a kiss to her temple, and did her best not to stiffen in her arms. She could get through this. She would get through this. All she could think, though, was that she was certain that whatever chance she may have had of winning the captain over disappeared when Hannah walked in to find her tongue down her daughter's throat.

"Of course not," Shepard said with forced brightness. "I made spaghetti." Shepard led Liara to the sofa and waited for her to sit before stepping out of the way to let her mother sit in the lone chair. She pulled the cover off the plate in front of Hannah with a flourish, the smell of garlic and rosemary flooding the cabin, then grabbed the covers from the remaining two plates and piled them carefully on her work table. She sat down beside Liara, their thighs just barely touching.

"Real tomatoes?" Hannah asked, twirling a fork through the pile of pasta on her plate.

Shepard laughed, "Right, mom. This might be a very well funded council ship, but it's still a ship. Powdered garlic, dried rosemary, a can of tomato paste, onion powder. All non perishable."

Hannah laughed, "Just like I used to make when you were little."

"Exactly," she paused for a second, glancing between her mother and her lover. "You should try Liara's estalle, though. It's asari but similar to this, only made with these little edible flowers from Thessia. It's like heaven served on pasta."

Hannah took another bite to avoid answering. Swallowing, she said, "Do you remember when you were, oh, I don't know, seven, maybe? And I'd brought fresh vegetables on board. You were so terrified of eating them that I couldn't find you for over an hour."

Shepard laughed, "I hid in engineering with Chief Bonston. Built myself into a tower of spare engine parts. I was convinced you couldn't see me! Chief was a good guy." Something about that story lingered with Shepard as her mother moved on to another topic, but she couldn't put her finger on it.

Shepard and her mother fell into an easy banter, remembering stories of Shepard's childhood. Liara listened with half an ear. Part of her wanted to listen, wanted this glimpse into what a young, innocent, Shepard was like.

_Jezebel._

Liara clenched her fists, listening as Hannah and Shepard talked about the ships Shepard had lived on.

_Harlot._

"The trouble I would get into!" Shepard chuckled. "I can still remember the layout of the duct systems on that ship!"

_Defiler._

"You were always such a curious child. It hasn't changed much," Hannah said, "Still getting into trouble because you don't know when to leave well enough alone?"

_You destroyed my daughter, you blue bitch. If not for you, my baby would still be alive._

The memories suddenly became too much. Liara's chest felt tight, her hands were numb. Her vision swam and she could no longer hear the conversation going on beside her. The feel of Shepard against her burned, it was too much to handle. The past rushed back towards her, enveloping her.

_You goddamn asari whore. I will see you pay for this. That creature you carry is no grandchild of mine._

Liara stood suddenly. Shepard cut off, staring at her. "Liara?" she asked, her voice tinged with concern.

"I'm... I just...," she forced a smile, "I need to use the restroom." Her voice broke, and she rushed off. For a moment Shepard thought she was going to leave, but at the last second she turned and walked into the attached bathroom.

She leaned against the cool metal of the bathroom door, trying to control her breathing. She didn't know what to think of her reaction; didn't know why she'd reacted so violently to the memories. It wasn't as if she hadn't thought of them before, they were always in the back of her mind, salient proof that she wasn't good enough for the great Commander Shepard. After Illira had been born she'd done her best to ignore it. Her own people had enough to say about the person she had become, and it was easier to focus on that then on her short, desperate relationship with Shepard. She'd faced whispers whenever she walked into a room with asari in it for the last three hundred years, had had to fight just to give Illira anything close to a normal life. None of it, none of the taunts, and the snide comments, the hushed conversations that ended abruptly, none of it had made her more than mildly irritated. And the truth was that in another life, one without Reapers, Shepard wouldn't have so much as looked sideways at her, and she'd long ago come to terms with that, because there had been Reapers, and a beautiful baby asari, and it all became such a minor thing.

Her heart beat wildly, and she slid to the floor. She knew she couldn't stay in here for long before Shepard got worried, but she'd take every moment she could.

"I have leave coming up this December. Assuming you can get the time, I thought maybe we could go visit New York. I hear it's beautiful that time of year. It's been awhile since we've spent a Christmas together," Hannah said, once the asari was out of the room. She could admit the girl was pretty, but something about her just made the hairs on the back of Captain Shepard's neck stand on end.

"Sure, mom, if I get the time. We'd love to come," Shepard said, distractedly, staring at the bathroom door.

"We? Oh, sweetie, I'd love to have your asari friend come too, but I thought maybe it could just be the two of us. Have a little mother daughter bonding time, you know?" She smiled, and leaned into Shepard's line of sight. The spectre turned, and looked at her mother. "What do you think?"

"Her name's Liara. She's been in there awhile, hasn't she?"

"I'm sure she's fine. You don't want to embarrass her." Hannah leaned back in the chair, watching her daughter glance between her plate and the door, never looking at one for more than a second or two before snatching her head away to look at the other.

"Yeah, you're probably right. But, um, no. I'd love you spend Christmas with you, but assuming everything that's going on finally blows over, I'm," she dropped her voice, leaning forward, eyes darting to the bathroom door again, "I'm going to ask her to marry me." Shepard blushed, and grinned foolishly, just biting off a girlish giggle that threatened to escape her lips. It had been on her mind ever since she'd seen Illira's picture and had considered what life without the imminent threat of war could be like, but this was the first time she'd voiced those thoughts aloud.

"Marry you? Do they even get married?" Hannah kept her face as calm as possible. She kept telling herself that she just wanted her daughter to be happy.

Shepard shrugged, "Don't know. I should find out. She's really been in there a long time." She stood, and moved slowly to the door, head cocked to the side.

Hannah watched her move toward the bathroom, obviously listening for any sound the asari might make. Her daughter glanced back at her, and Hannah sighed.

Her baby girl had always had her father's eyes. And the last time she had seen that particular look in eyes like that had been the day her daughter had been born. Jack had held her hand while the doctors told her that despite the images showing their baby in a birthing position just days before, she'd flipped. She was breach, and labor was too far advanced for them to try an emergency C-section. For all their medical advancements, there was nothing they could do about it except let nature take its course.

That day Jack had turned his large eyes on her, and she'd seen the same care that now crossed her daughter's features. It was guilt – Jack had blamed himself for the complications with the birth no matter what anyone told him. She wasn't sure what her daughter was feeling guilty about, but it was written across her face clear as day. It was worry. It was pain.

It was love.

Shepard was standing at the door now, torn between knocking and just letting Liara be.

"Goddamnit," Hannah muttered and joined her daughter. She needed to nip this in the bud, now. "Sweetie, I brought along a strawberry shortcake when I came on board. Your favorite. That Williams girl said she'd put it in the mess for me, why don't you go get it and see if you can dig up a bottle of wine. I'll talk to the- um, to Liara."

Shepard laid a hand on the bathroom door, and nodded. This is what she'd wanted, anyway. Her mom to talk to Liara, to get to know her. "Alright. And _Lieutenant Commander_ Williams is the ships XO, Mom. Just sayin'."

"Don't just say, sweetheart. Now scoot."

Once she heard the elevator door shut, Hannah knocked on the door of the bathroom. "Miss T'Soni? I believe we need to speak."

There was no answer from the other side, but Hannah took a step back and waited. Slightly less than a minute passed before the door slid open and the asari stepped out of the bathroom. She didn't say a word, and her face was a complete mask. She glided past the elder Shepard and retook her seat on the sofa. Hannah sat across from her, crossing her legs.

"You wanted to talk," Liara said, her voice devoid of any emotion.

"I did. I think we need to get something clear." Liara nodded, and leaned back, waiting for her to continue. "I don't like you," she said simply, which drew a small smile to the asari's lips. "I don't think you're near good enough for my baby girl, no matter how many degrees on useless subjects you have. If I could have my way you'd never get anywhere near her. Ever."

Liara remained silent, but she shifted in her seat, sitting forward slightly.

"My daughter loves you, heaven knows why. And while I don't discount the idea that you may have done something to begin with to twist her mind, I can't deny what I see. She loves you, and apparently it isn't some damned asari magic. So, I propose a truce."

Liara leaned forward, bracing herself with hands on her knees. "I'm listening." Hannah thought there might have been a bit of desperation in the asari's tone, but she admitted she could just have easily been imagining it.

"I will keep my mouth shut. I will let my daughter have her fun. In return, I ask that should it look like she is taking your relationship too seriously, you end it."

There was a long silence. Liara's face remained impassive, but finally her brows knit together and she said, rather forcefully, "No."

"I beg your pardon?"

"You can beg all you like, Captain Shepard. I love your daughter, and she loves me. Asari cannot use 'mind control' to make people fall in love with them. And even if we could, I certainly wouldn't do that to your daughter. Now, whatever my relationship with her, where ever it leads, none of that is your business." Her voice was a blank slate, and Hannah couldn't tell what the asari was thinking. Her tone was strikingly different from the easy, soft tone shhannah had heard in the cargo bay.

"Now listen here," Hannah said, her voice rising, "I won't let you destroy my daughter. Do you understand me? She's got a bright future ahead of her and I won't let some two-bit woman-"

"Is that your issue?" Liara cut in, "Because I assure you, I am not a human woman."

"That has nothing to do with this, and you know it. You let me believe a lie, that my girl was dead! You had the audacity to stand in front of me, when you knew she was alive!"

"I knew no such thing. Your daughter was dead, Captain Shepard, of that you can be sure. And even if she hadn't been, it wasn't as if you ever let me say a word in the first place." Something between despair and anger tinged the asari's tone, the first emotion Hannah had seen from her since she'd walked out of the bathroom.

Hannah bit off a retort. They didn't have much time, and she had to get through to the asari. Throwing insults wouldn't help anyone right now. "I just want to know that my daughter will be safe," she said, changing tactics, "I want someone for her that can take care of her. You can understand that, I'm sure."

Liara could understand that, it's all she'd ever wanted for Illira, but keeping from breaking into a screaming rage or dissolving into tears kept her from saying so. Biting the inside of her cheek to ground herself, she said, "I understand that you would control your adult daughter's future without letting her know. And I know how she would take it if she found out. I'll keep my silence, because you are her mother. But never question that I would do anything to keep your daughter safe, Captain Shepard."

Before Hannah could answer, the door opened and Shepard came in, a bottle of wine in one hand and balancing a tray on the other. Liara's face lost its mask, and she smiled wildly. She cast a quick look at Shepard's mother, then moved to take the cake from her lover.

"It looks delicious, mom. D'you bake it?"

"Very funny, dear. I got it at Arcturus once Hackett confirmed you were coming."

Shepard cleared the small table, the dirty dishes piled onto the desk beside the sofa. She smiled at the two women, trying to ignore the tension that infused the air. She supposed she hadn't been gone long enough, but she hadn't been able to come up with an excuse to stay away any longer. She couldn't complain, though, when Liara leaned against her, and just wrapped an arm around her shoulders. She didn't catch the glare her lover cast at her mother, either. For her part, Hannah filed the battle away as lost, but consoled herself that the war wasn't over yet.

The shortcake gone, and most of the bottle of wine, and Shepard could find no reason to force Liara and her mother into each others company anymore. The tension that she'd felt from Liara while they'd been eating dinner had seemed to transfer to her mother, and though they conversed with each other to some degree it was clear neither was comfortable in the others presence. She just couldn't figure out why.

Her mother had always had a big heart, one that seemed to envelope the entire galaxy. Or, at least that's what Shepard remembered of her childhood. The new knowledge that her mother was uncomfortable around Turians notwithstanding, there was no reason why the woman that had raised Shepard should not be instantly enamored with Liara. None. But it was clear she wasn't, and nothing that Liara said or did seemed to help.

For her part, Liara did her best to be civil. She felt mildly foolish clinging to Shepard like she was, as if she were laying claim to her, but it gave her an excuse to not look at the captain. If she had to come off as simpering fool, so be it. She had a feeling she looked more sleepy than simpering though; Shepard was warm, and the stress of the day was finally slipping away. She forced herself to keep her eyes open, to stay awake until Hannah was gone. The soldier's attempts to remove her from her daughter's life had lit a small fire in her. She may not deserve Shepard, but she had her, she loved her, and there was no doubt she was loved in return.

"Do you remember those blocks you used to play with?" Hannah asked as she got up to leave.

"The ones Dad made me? Yeah, I remember them why?"

"I haven't seen them in awhile, I thought you still had them. So many of your things are gone," Hannah answered, casting a telling look at Liara. For her part the Shadow Broker just stared back. She could see where this was going already, but she'd let Shepard handle it. She had promised to keep her mouth shut.

"Yeah, I think they're in the trunk there," she said, pointing to the battered truck Liara had brought with her, "Do you want them?"

"No. It's nice to know they're safe. When you, when we all thought you were dead I went to clean out your apartment. I guess the- I guess Liara," she corrected with a fake smile, "came by and cleaned it out before I got there."

Shepard stiffened, and Liara could feel a mild, rising panic in her for a brief moment, "What? I don't understand."

"When I went by, so many things were gone. I heard someone had come by, and the landlord let them in. I guess that was you?" she said, finally turning to Liara.

"It couldn't have been," Shepard answered for her, catching on, "she had a key. But what about Dad's medals? Liara said they were gone, I thought you had them? You said you had them."

Hannah let out a long breath, trying her best not to appear angry. Of course the asari had a key, and of course she had to make the one mistake that let her daughter know she was lying. She'd taught her girl too well it seemed. "You're right, of course. I went back later to pick up some of the other things, pictures and things, and they were gone. I thought you'd been robbed."

Shepard closed her eyes, her hand balling into a fist against Liara's side. Her nails would have probably scratched if not for the thick fabric of the dress Liara wore, but all the same the pressure hurt. She didn't move away, but leaned into the hand slightly until Shepard relaxed.

"It's been great to see you mom, and we'll see about Christmas. It's been a long day, let me walk you back to your ship." She extracted herself from Liara's side, gave her a reassuring look and quickly removed her mother from the room.

"It was nice to see you too, sweetheart," her mother said when they were on the elevator. It was the first thing she'd said that sounded sincere since Shepard had left to get the cake.

"This is bullshit mother."

"Watch your mouth. You may be too old for me to wash it out with soap, but don't think I won't try."

"You're right, I am too old for any of this. I'm not sixteen anymore. I haven't been for a long time. I. Love. Liara. Do you get it? No more games. No tricks. I'm not playing with you. I don't know what the fuck I did to deserve her, but I'm not going to let you screw it up. In the very unlikely event we do meet you on Earth when all this is done, you will be nice! Honestly nice." Shepard took a deep breath and leaned against the wall of the elevator. "I don't know what happened to you, mom. I don't know where everything went wrong. I'm sorry I didn't call you as soon as I woke up, but I was in a fight for my life and making a call home wasn't really high on my priority list, okay? But that is no reason for you to try and weasel your way into something you know nothing about. I love you, I do, but I won't let you hurt her. Do I make myself clear?"

"Crystal," Hannah answered, the word clipped and cold.

"And I want the stuff you took from my apartment back. You can ship it to the Citadel, care of the council. You can keep dad's stuff if you want it, but I want the rest of it." They'd made it to the airlock and without waiting for her mother to go through, Shepard turned on a heel and left.

Liara wasn't upstairs when Shepard returned, but all the dirty dishes were gone as well, so she didn't worry too much.

"Joker, as soon as the Orizaba's crew is done, get us out of here. I don't care where, I just want to be gone."

She didn't hear the pilot's answer as she dug through the layer of old holos and knick knacks at the bottom of her old trunk. She found the blocks her mother had been talking about and lay them out on the floor. Her father had hand painted the blocks of wood while her mother had been pregnant with her. She'd had store bought alphabet blocks, but these had been her favorite. They had been her first lesson in art and science. The blocks held the periodic table on two sides, a third side was taken up with pictures of various Earth animals, two more with numbers and mathematical symbols, but what had always intrigued Shepard as a child, was the final side to them. Like a puzzle the square pieces when put together correctly created a small copy of Leonardo Da Vinci's Vitruvian Man.

Her father had been quite the artist, though her mother had told her he never thought of himself as any good, and he'd also been a dedicated scientist. He'd been an Alliance science officer, not a front line soldier, which had made his death all the harder for her mother to bare. And, Shepard thought as she put the last, small block into place, he may have just saved the galaxy.

Because looking down at the image her father had once painted, and she had put together for the first time since she'd been six, Shepard remembered something.

Phi wasn't a number.

It was a ratio.


	9. Chapter 9

**First off...thank you for the reviews! Oh, how I love waking up in the morning to find them in my inbox. And I'm so glad that bitchy Hannah didn't go over like the ton of bricks I thought she would. Who knew? :)**

* * *

A ship sits on the horizon of the One Sea, it rocks on the gentle waves. Liara stands on the shore, it's gentle curves evidence of the lack of a tidal pull by a moons gravity. She watches the ship, but it doesn't get any closer, nor does it slip over the edge of the horizon. This is her home, this is Thessia. A salty breeze flows over her and she breathes in deeply. This is what her childhood smelt like, even though they lived miles from the shore. She can remember, very distant memories now, her mother taking her on trips to the beach. They would pick seashells, and watch the large, blue Jullar crabs scurry along the waters edge. A lack of a tide makes the former activity difficult, but they would dive below the shallow waves and run fingers through the sand to find these hidden treasures. They would surface, and Liara can remember her mother laughing as they swam together back to the shore. The Jullar would nip at their toes, and Liara, with only a child's vocabulary, would try to talk to them.

The memory brings a smile to her lips, and Liara kicks off her shoes and digs her toes into the sand. The mild blue glow of the water catches the rays of the setting sun and as she steps into the waves the combination makes it look like her feet are glowing. She looks back at the ship, but still it hasn't moved. She wonders if it every will.

She runs her hands down her arms, suddenly chilly. She turns, ready to return home, and sees her father walking toward her. She raises a hand in greeting.

"Heya kid. Why are you all the way out here?"

"I came to watch the waves, one last time."

Her father nods, and follows her gaze out to the ship in the distance. "The girlfriend sends her regards. Told me to give you a kiss from her, but yeah, there are just some things you don't do to your own kid, ya know?"

Liara laughs, and leans over, kissing her father's cheek. "Give that back to her for me," she says with a laugh, "Is she coming?"

"You know she'd love to. But with everything, she's just too busy."

Liara nods. "Yeah, I know." It hurts that Shepard won't be there to watch the sun set with them. She has always wanted to share this with her.

"Your mother might come though. Nezzy was always a sucker for the sea. Why we settled on the homeworld after you were born, our little bird needed to learn how to swim." There is something about this statement that feels wrong to Liara, but she doesn't know exactly what it is. Something is just a little out of place, something she should know, but doesn't.

"I'd like that," she says, "Illira'll be here too, if she can drag herself away from her studies."

"Damn grandkid's just like you. Always got her nose in a book. Shouldn't have read you all those stories as a kid, you went and passed them on."

"You wouldn't have it any other way."

"You're probably right," Shepard says. Liara turns away from watching the ship on the horizon. Her father is gone, and Shepard is in her place. "But then, however our kids turn out, I know they'll be perfect. A whole bunch of little yous."

Liara smiles, and throws her arms around Shepard's neck. Of course it wasn't her father that was here. Her mother was years dead, and her father no longer knew that she knew who she was. She presses a warm kiss to Shepard's lips, which is returned.

"I thought you couldn't make it," Liara whispers into Shepard's ear, "I thought the rebuilding on Earth wouldn't let you get away."

"As if I would miss the birth of our daughter for anything," Shepard answers, kissing her again.

Liara looks at Shepard in confusion, then down at her swollen belly. She feels her daughter move, feels the touch of the developing mind touch hers. She wonders what she was confused about, but writes it off as hormones. She is due any moment now, overdue in truth. She rubs a hand over the swell of her abdomen, and smiles when Shepard presses a hand over hers.

"I am ready to meet her," Liara says, her voice bright and cheerful.

"Let's not wait then," Shepard growls, eyes flashing a bright red.

Before Liara can so much as open her mouth to answer, Shepard moves and her hand reaches into Liara's womb. It doesn't hurt as the child is ripped from her, though she can feel the warm trickle of blood as the skin breaks. The infant screams, its face turning purple as it desperately fights for oxygen. Shepard rips the secondary umbilical from the child's neck, and Liara can feel her daughter's pain for a split second before the connection is cut. Shepard moves the infant to lay against her arm, the primary umbilical still connected from the child's belly to the placenta that remains attached to the uterine wall. The child is covered in purple blood, and it smears on Shepard's arms.

Shepard reaches toward the child with her free hand, and Liara doesn't know if she is going for the chord that still attaches her to her daughter, or just wants to comfort the screaming baby.

Liara turns her head, looking out to sea, and the ship on the horizon is gone and her father's voice rings in her ears.

"Don't fear Athame's daughters."

* * *

She woke with a start, her heart pounding. Where the sheets touched her bare skin it felt like someone had rubbed the skin raw and she jumped out of the bed. Asari didn't have sweat glands, instead her crest radiated excess heat, and if that was not enough, or in cases where the crest and neck ridges were not exposed to the air, the tiny scales that made up her skin worked along the same lines as a radiator. The capillaries just under her skin would engorge with blood, and the scales would lift on one edge. As air passed over them, the blood would cool, and recirculate.

It was highly effective, doubly so in moist climates where the humidity worked to leach additional heat from her body, but it had one large drawback. Where ever the scales were inflamed, and terror and the flight or fight response caused many of the same physical reactions as being overheated, her skin became extra sensitive. The nerves were nearly exposed to the elements when it happened, and every touch was multiplied. Shepard had figured out the quirk to asari migrating erogenous zones long ago, and had made a point of finding ways to exploit it, however the fine line between pleasure and pain was tricky to balance, and Liara had already fallen off.

Every last inch of her seemed to hurt, and the fading images of the dream only made it worse. She couldn't focus long enough to find a way to cool herself off, and thus begin the process of calming down. She gasped for breath, only dimly aware of where she was. Her panic woke Shepard, who blinked blearily once before snapping awake and with training instilled in her long ago, was up and hovering protectively around the panicking asari.

"Liara? What's wrong?" she asked, reaching out to stop the other woman's mad rush around the room.

Liara shied away from the hand. She wasn't sure if it was because of the dream, or fear that Shepard touching her would hurt, though perhaps it was both. She made a small, almost squeaky sound in the back of her throat as she tried to speak, but though her mind was slowly regaining balance, her body had yet to catch up and every movement felt like being stabbed with a million tiny needles where her underwear and the t shirt she'd been sleeping in rubbed against her making it difficult to form actual coherent sentences.

Shepard, without laying a hand on her, guided her toward the bathroom. She helped Liara strip, and made her sit on the toilet while she turned the water of the shower on. Liara's first reaction was to panic, not wanting to think of what the high pressure stream of water on her overly sensitive skin would feel like. But Shepard didn't lead her under the spray. Instead, she turned the water to just below ambient body temperature, and changed the head setting to steam. The clever design turned the tiny bathroom into a somewhat chilly sauna, but it did the trick. In moments, Liara was feeling better, her heart rate had slowed, and her breathing came back under control.

Shepard moved and knelt in front of her, still not touching her, her hands hovering just over Liara's knees.

After a minute of just sitting in silence, Liara finally took a deep, shaky breath. "Thank you. I...Thank you."

She had suffered through her fair share of nightmares since she'd returned to the past, but none of them had affected her like this one. They might cause her to wake with a start, or wake Shepard thrashing in her sleep, but it took a lot for a dream to cause the asari equivalent of a night sweat, especially one of this degree. She tried to think of what in the dream could have caused the reaction, but couldn't place it. The image of Shepard tearing the lifeline between her and the dream child caused her heart to clench, but she knew Shepard would never hurt her or any child of theirs. Yet, as she thought of it, the fear settled back over her, and she quickly shook the image away.

"Feeling better?" Shepard asked, the clothes she'd been sleeping in now sticking to her skin as the moisture in the air saturated the fabric.

"Yes. How did you...know what to do?" Liara asked, waving a hand at the running shower before grabbing both of Shepard's with hers. Talking was making the transition to normal easier, though fleeting waves of panic still threatened to overtake her.

Shepard blushed, and pulled her hands away, standing up. "I might possibly have maybe purchased the entire Asari What to Expect series off the extranet." She turned away, rubbing the back of her neck.

The 200-year-old pregnancy guide series had quickly become a galactic sensation when the publishing house on Earth had adapted it to other species. The asari version was the oldest of the non-terrestrial versions, having reached print only three years after human's made first contact. It's original edition had been geared toward the human parent, but later editions shifted focus back to the mother. Like the human version, the asari one was a series of books, covering the first ten years or so of asari development, or until the equivalent development stage of a human four year old. Liara had more or less lived by the books until Illira had been five, and Samara told her she was being stifling.

Liara smiled for the first time since the dream had forced her awake. "I am not pregnant, Shepard. And that doesn't answer my question." She stood and moved to Shepard's side. The human shut the water off, and shrugged.

"I know, I just like being prepared." She shrugged a second time. "I like the idea. And apparently, infant asari have difficulty regulating their own body temperature for the first year if the air is too dry. The book said a humidifier in the nursery is the best solution, but the shower was the closest thing I had."

Liara laughed and shook her head. "I don't think I will ever understand you," she said, pressing a kiss to the side of Shepard's mouth.

"Don't stop trying," Shepard answered. She walked them to the door, stripping off her wet clothes as she did. They crawled back into bed, Shepard wrapping herself around Liara, her breasts pressed tightly against the asari's back. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"About what?" Liara asked, already drifting back to sleep.

"The dream. It helps if you talk about it." Not that anyone knew a thing about her own dreams, but she had heard that talking about it did help.

"It was nothing. I don't remember."

"Liara," Shepard chastised, seeing right through the lie.

Liara rolled over so she was facing Shepard. She leaned her forehead against the humans and closed her eyes. "I was on Thessia, watching a ship out on the sea. My dad came by, but then she was you, and...," she trailed off. She couldn't repeat what she'd seen, Shepard's hand, covered in blood, reaching down toward the child. The baby, screaming, its warbling cries echoing across the water. Instead she buried her face in Shepard's neck. "It was just a dream."

"What did I do?" Shepard asked, running her fingers along the back of Liara's neck. The slight pressure was more reassuring than sexual, but Liara pressed herself against Shepard anyway. If they made love, Shepard would stop talking.

"It was just a dream, Shepard," she said, running her fingers down Shepard's side.

"Don't think to distract me T'Soni. This wasn't a normal dream; you don't normally start hyperventilating."

Liara growled deep in her throat and nuzzled Shepard's neck, but it didn't work, just made the spectre stop playing with the ridges on her neck. "It was my mind processing some of the issues I've been having with leaving Illira, and then seeing your mother again. It's nothing," she leaned back slightly, and kissed her. "Really, Shepard, I am fine. I used to have night terrors as a child, it was just a matter of time before I had one again." That wasn't a lie, not really. But it had been over three hundred years, or at least eighty depending on how you looked at it, since the last time she woke actually screaming. She had barely even come up to her mother's waist at the time, when Benezia would come into her room, stroke her underdeveloped crest and sit with her until she fell back asleep. She hadn't spoken with her mother in over ten years when the Matriarch had died at Shepard's hands, and she hadn't really missed her mother since the day she'd stormed out of the house; this marked the third time. Immediately after her death, Liara had wanted to see her again, and the day Illira was born. And right now. Right now she missed her mother so much it hurt. She pushed the feeling aside, and focused on the soft caress that was Shepard's voice as she spoke.

"Then tell me who your dad was in your dream. Who do you imagine it is? Some famous asari hero? A justicar? Oh, I bet Samara's your dad." Shepard laughed.

Liara smiled despite herself, thinking of how much like a parent Samara had acted towards her while she'd been raising Illlira. What a gift from the Goddess the justicar had been. "I forgot you don't know. You've met her, on Illium. She was the matriarch tending the bar near my office."

"_That bartender_!" Shepard said, eyes bright. "I saw her on the broker base, uh, watching you."

Liara nodded against Shepard's neck. "Yes. And I'm sorry I kept you from surprising me again."

"I'll see if I can forgive you," Shepard answered, wondering exactly what surprise Liara had prevented, but not caring as she rolled the asari onto her back.

* * *

Shepard shrugged into her jacket, never taking her eyes off the woman in her bed. The sheets were tangled at Liara's waist, exposing the expanse of bare flesh on her back. With the lights in the cabin still off, the blue glow from the fish tank made the skin on her back seem to ripple. It was, Shepard thought, probably the most entrancing sight in the galaxy, and quite possibly the universe. She could just stand there for hours, watching her lover breathe and the small muscle twitches as she dreamed. She wished she could stay, or crawl back into bed with her.

There was a galaxy to save, however, and if she could finish that by this afternoon, well she'd be one very happy Spectre. She was fairly certain she'd figured out what needed to be done. The Citadel was, as far as Shepard could find out from a few extranet searches and a search of the Spectre database, modular. Though the wards were attached permanently to the Presidium hub, nothing inside them was. Entire buildings could be moved within them. This happened rarely, the last major changes happening after Sovereign's attack, but it was possible. The Presidium changed almost monthly, offices suddenly showing up on the other side of walkway, walkways shifting to go over some new stretch of water. No one knew how, or why these changes occurred, but they did, and more importantly, they could.

_Most_ importantly, however, was the fact that the tower could be moved along the curve of the presidium, and its height could change. Shepard was fairly certain that her message to herself – or more likely the Prothean Liara occasionally mentioned, Shepard couldn't remember his name – meant she should find a way to make the tower meet the basic rules for visual perfection.

She just needed to figure out how.

That was the cusp of the problem though. When she'd first thought throwing a number out there would fix things it had been fairly simple to wander around and plug it into any terminal she happened to come across and hope. She and Liara had made a game out of it, in fact. It had come to nothing, and it had taken her mother's jabbed, pointed comments and bigoted pride to make Shepard remember not only the blocks her father had made her, but the game she had played with Chief Bonston as a child. Phi on the Tower. She hadn't thought of the game in over twenty years, but as she'd been putting her old toys away it had suddenly dawned on her.

It hadn't really been a game, but more a way to keep the inquisitive and mostly annoying young Shepard out of the engineer's hair while he worked. The rules were simple. Given a pile of everyday objects, Shepard had been tasked with making the mathematically most visually pleasing tower out of them. Without a ruler or a calculator.

It had kept her busy for hours on end, and while it hadn't made her pay any more attention in math class that she had before, it had taught her a lot. And more than just how to divide. She'd pulled from the busy work posing as a game the meaning of perseverance and of thinking outside the box. It taught her the power of doing things for yourself, but also that it was okay to ask for help. It was, she thought now, one of those things that had shaped the woman she had become. And she'd need all of that if she was going to stop the nightmare that Liara's memories showed the war was.

It had also given her a good eye when it came to proportion, and as she moved toward the bed, she smiled at the near perfection that was the woman laying on it. She ran a finger along one of the ridges on Liara's neck, enjoying the sleepy sound it brought to the blue woman's lips. Shepard knew Liara hadn't slept well after the dream she'd had, and had spent most of the night in something more akin to a trance than actual sleep, but she wasn't one to skip out without saying goodbye either. Even if these were, technically, her quarters and she was, technically, just going to work.

"Hey, sleepyhead," she whispered, squatting down beside the bed. Liara opened her eyes slowly, a slow smile crossing her lips that almost made Shepard decide that being late for her meeting with Udina would be okay. "Joker says we're going to be docking in about fifteen minutes. Are you coming with me?"

Liara stretched and sat up, rubbing the sleep from her eyes. "You have figured out what you need to do?"

"No more so than I did yesterday, really, but I'll just cross my fingers. And maybe the councilors can point me in the right direction," she said just a little sardonically.

"I'm sure they will. Would you mind terribly if I didn't go?" Liara asked, stifling a yawn.

"You know I wouldn't. Go back to sleep, I'll contact you when I'm done. And we can go celebrate kicking the Reapers ass before they even showed up."

Liara laughed, and leaned forward to kiss Shepard's cheek. "That sounds wonderful. I'll be waiting." Her voice was deep, husky, and Shepard swatted at her arm.

"Damn woman, keep that up and I'm not going anywhere."

"Shepard, you have an incoming transmission from the Councilor's office," EDI interrupted. Shepard rolled her eyes, stealing one last kiss. "Shall I patch it through to your quarters?"

"No, EDI. I'll be down in a minute. They can bloody well wait a few minutes. I'll see you later," she added to Liara, who had curled back up on the bed, hugging Shepard's pillow. "I really hate the councilors right now," she muttered as she left the room.

Udina's asari aide was whose image was projected into the comm. Shepard raised a questioning eyebrow at the woman, who she always considered young, despite the fact that she probably had fifty or sixty years on Liara. "Is everything alright? I was expecting Udina."

"I apologize, but the Councilor will be unable to make your meeting with him today. Due to the short notice, I did not want to risk that you would check your messages, Spectre Shepard. He has asked that you speak with one of the other Councilors, and that he would try to make time to speak with you in a few days."

"O-kay," Shepard said, drawing the word out. That wasn't like Udina, especially since he'd seemed so excited about bringing her down a notch or two again for the whole 'steal the Normandy from the Alliance' thing. She knew she was never going to live that down, never mind that she'd been little more than Liara's pawn. A mostly willing pawn, true, but it was still Liara's fault. "Is the councilor alright?"

"He is fine. He just expects an earlier meeting to run late. He appreciates your understanding." The connection was cut.

Shepard stared at the now empty comm terminal, and considered calling the office back. She needed to get the information on the tower stats, and access to the central terminal in the council chambers. She was fairly certain that from there she'd be able to make the changes she needed to the proportions of the tower and Presidium. And she couldn't get in without council permission. It was the only place on the citadel, in fact, that her Sprectre status wouldn't let her go.

She paced the room for a minute, thinking. She could go to the other councilors. One of them would probably let her in. It wasn't like they had a reason to keep her out. On the other hand, though, she was the first human spectre. Udina was the human councilor, albeit the second one. She paused, thinking perhaps she could try to contact Anderson. He might still have council clearance; his leaving had been a very quick thing if she remembered the news vids right.

She could also just walk up to the council chambers and wait outside. She was Spectre Shepard after all and some nice janitor or keeper would let her in eventually.

"Traynor," she said into the ships internal comm after another minute of internal deliberation, "get me one of the other councilors on the line." She liked playing fast and loose with the rules, especially where the councilors were concerned, but now wasn't the time.

"Right away, ma'am," came the almost instant reply.

Shepard waited, and eventually Tevos appeared before her.

"Is there something you needed, Spectre. In general, our Spectres confer with the representatives of their own species when one has a council seat." She didn't sound angry, just amused, and Shepard took that as a good sign.

"I understand, Councilor," Shepard answered, trying to be as deferential as possible, "however, Udina recently canceled my meeting with him and requested that I meet with you instead."

"Did he? Interesting. I'm afraid I don't have the time for a formal meeting, but what is it that you need?"

"Just a moment of your time, Councilor. We believe there may be a flaw in the weapon the Alliance is building, but we might have found a way to fix it. I'd rather not discuss it over an open channel however."

"I'm afraid I can't help you. While I've given Liara what support I can for the weapon, I simply don't have the time today. I can see you tomorrow just after lunch, however, if you haven't gotten in to see Udina by then. I will also send him a message enforcing the urgency of your situation. I'm sure he'll be accommodating."

Shepard growled as the comm died again. Stupid councilors. All of them. Politicians to the bone, and it made getting anything done impossible. What the hell could she be doing all day that she couldn't spare five minutes where Shepard didn't have to worry about someone other than her girlfriend getting the information. Anyone could hack into the feed of the comm, and the councilor knew it. She'd have to ask about getting the second end of the QEC moved from Earth to the Citadel. It wasn't like she needed to contact anyone back on the homeworld anyway. She needed access to the council that couldn't be tapped. Or just install a third relay. She made a note to ask Traynor what that would involve later, and then had the specialist connect her to one of the other councilors.

Valern didn't answer, his aide told her he was ill, and Shepard had no reason to doubt it, though it just compounded her frustration. Sparatus was coldly polite, but refused to see her just the same.

She knew it was somewhat last minute, but honestly, she was one of their spectres. She didn't think it was insane to ask them to spare her five minutes. She stormed from the comm room, biting her tongue to keep the string of curses from echoing around the CIC. She walked onto the bridge and threw herself into the empty copilot seat.

"They're hanging up on me now," she said in response to Joker's questioning look.

"Only a matter of time before they caught on, I guess. What'd you do to piss them off this time?"

"Asked, politely, for a minute of their damn time."

Joker chuckled, "Ah, see, I've always told you, you should yell more."

"Right," Shepard chuckled.

"I'm serious. You're too nice to them. I mean, you have been, recently. I can't imagine any of them holding a grudge for broken comm signals."

"Apparently they can. How long?"

"Five minutes. I have clearance, already."

"Thank, Joker. I think I may just crash Udina's party."

Joker chuckled as she left.

* * *

Liara tightened the belt on her coat, and cast one last look around the cabin. She'd let Shepard think she was staying aboard, and felt mildly guilty for it, but what she needed to do, she needed to do alone. Shepard would want to come with her. Moral support she'd call it.

She'd hover, like she had the last time, just outside her peripheral vision. She wouldn't say a word, wouldn't interrupt, she would just be there. It wasn't that she didn't want Shepard there when she met her father for the second time, but at the same time she didn't want her to hear about the dream. And her intention with going to talk to Aethyta had everything to do with that dream. She'd had a similar one after she'd finally let Shepard go back to sleep.

It had been Benezia and Aethyta, standing together on the coast. The ship was on the horizon again, rocking in the soft waves. Her parents had watched the ship, not looking at her.

She had approached them, standing between them.

"Hello, Little Wing," her mother had said.

"Hello, mother."

"Hey, kid. Why are you still here?"

"I have no where else to go," she'd answered her father.

"Athame's daughters walk the sea. You should go with them," her mother whispered.

"I don't understand!"

"Don't worry, Little Wing," her mother said, picking her up. She was no more than twelve now, missing both her front teeth, the soft cartilage of her crest a solid mass on her head. "You won't get in trouble for being up past your bedtime."

"Don't wanna go a-sleep, mommy," she said.

"Daddy's gonna read you a bedtime story. It's your favorite."

Her mother had tucked her into a bed made of seaweed.

And then she'd woken up for the third time that night. She hadn't woken Shepard that time, she hadn't thrashed or panicked. If anything, she'd felt comforted by the dream.

But that, and the nightmare, had sat with her even as she'd drifted into a dreamless sleep moments later.

It left her just one option that she could see. She needed to talk to her father. She didn't think that Aethyta would be able to help interpret the dreams, she wasn't entirely sure there was anything to interpret, but obviously her subconscious mind was stuck on thoughts of her parents. And in general she'd found that the easiest way to appease her subconscious was to do what it wanted.

Within reason, of course.

She wasn't sure if talking to her dad classified as within reason, but it was what she had to work with.

She straightened her clothes one last time, put on her boots, and went down to her office. From the window there she could see when they docked. She could give herself just enough time for Shepard to get to the Embassies and then she'd make her way to Apollo's.

Simple.

And Shepard would be none the wiser. She'd already forgotten, it seemed, her desire to hear the nightmare, for which Liara was grateful.

She would never forget the image of Shepard holding their daughter, and not knowing whether the woman wanted to kill the child or comfort it.

She shook her head, casting the thoughts aside.

Doubt wasn't something she had time for, and it wasn't something she ever associated with Shepard. It had just been a rough few days, and she just needed time to collect herself. She couldn't think of anyone better than her father to put her in her place, to not let her bullshit herself into thinking things that would never happen.

Shepard loved her, period. And she would love their daughters when they had them, period.

But seeing her dad again would be nice.


	10. Chapter 10

**The best part of having the majority of a chapter written weeks ago is how fast you can update! Don't expect this to become habit though, I just happened to have the entire center section of this written since before I started writing anything else :) Also, as today is the fourth, and I am a proud American, and I live in the desert _and its RAINING (_in the desert, where we have like less that four inches of rainfall A YEAR), the next update might be a bit quicker too. Unless it stops raining. Or someone discovers how to use a charcoal grill inside. Or my sister's boyfriend actually does set off the M80 in the pool (my votes for this one). I also think I may have taken some liberties with Liara's familty history, but I couldn't find anything on it one way or another.**

**Bah, stupid spell check and my not actually looking when I hit "correct all". **** Thanks, Theodur.**

* * *

The Presidium shone, the artificial light bouncing off the metal railings, reflecting off the glass. It was always one thirty in the afternoon here, the light coming from an angle to prevent most reflections from becoming blinding, and mildly diffused in case that wasn't enough, even with a cloudless sky. People milled about of the elevated paths; shopping, eating. Children ran past, screaming in joy as they chased each other. Liara took a half step out of the way as a group of young human school children almost ran her over. Their frazzled looking teacher gave her an apologetic smile as she followed and tried to reign them in. The group made their way over to the Conduit, which the residents of the Citadel still took to be nothing more than a rather fancy Prothean statue.

She could still remember the first time Shepard had walked with her past the Prothean relay, and the way Shepard had laughed at her when she'd spent the next twenty minutes lecturing the human and Garrus on the art and culture of the species that had created it. It was embarrassing, still, to think of how wrong she'd been. As she made her way down the stairs to her father's bar, she shot a quick message to Feron, hoping he'd been able to secure Eden Prime. She had a half dozen people in the vicinity, and hopefully between them they could help the colonists fight back if Cerberus did show up. As long as the capsule went undamaged, Liara was pretty sure they had at least a year before it began losing power. There were still days she pissed Javik's snide, holier-than-thou attitude, though, and hoped that it wouldn't take that long to go get him. He might even be friendlier if there wasn't a war on.

Liara slipped up to the bar, and waited for her father to see her. Aethyta was talking to an older Turian that Liara was fairly certain was trying to hit on the matriarch, and failing miserably at it if her father's face was anything to go by. She didn't bother to take the empty bar stool beside her, but rather leaned against the counter and waited. It wasn't long before her father extracted herself from the conversation with the Turian and came up to her.

"Well, well, well, haven't seen you in awhile, kid. Left Illium in a bit of a hurry." She pulled a bottle of Canadian rye out from under the bar. "You still drinking this crap?"

Liara smiled, nodding, "On occasion," she said. She could still remember the first time she tried it. Not long after Shepard had rescued her from Therum, she'd come across Kaidan drinking it with Shepard at the mess table. It was before he'd discovered her to be his rival, and he'd asked her to join them. She'd almost spit the stuff out, and had been fairly sure he had been trying to poison her. After Virmire, Shepard had drunk almost a bottle of the stuff by herself in Kaidan's honor. It hadn't been until after Ilos that Liara had found her own taste for Shepard's alcohol of choice. She'd drunk almost nothing else since Shepard's death in '83.

Aethyta snorted, and poured Liara a glass. "Tab?"

"No, father. I'm actually here to talk to you."

Aethyta stared at her for a long minute, then drank the whiskey she'd poured for Liara. "Shit, kid. How long have you known?"

"Long enough. Can we sit?" She waved vaguely in the direction of the cafe's tables.

"Did you know on Illium? Why the hell didn't you say anything?"

"No, not then. And I'm fairly certain that if I had the Matriarch's would have placed someone else as my tail. Someone who wasn't quite so understanding."

Aethyta poured another drink and tossed that one back as well before grabbing a second glass and the bottle. "Kyle! I'm gonna be gone for twenty. I'll be on the deck." She moved out from behind the bar, and strode off toward one of the vacant tables. Liara followed, smirking. Her father took a seat at a table mashed into the corner, blocked from view on one side by a large potted tree, and two others by the balcony railing. Liara slipped into the seat across from her. "So, what's with the sudden family reunion? Shit, that came out wrong. I don't want you to think I don't want to get you know you, or anything. I mean-"

"I know, Dad. I...I...is there anything you want to know?" This wasn't exactly how she'd planned. It wasn't that she'd forgotten that her father didn't know her, exactly, so much as she'd forgotten that Shepard had told the matriarch she was showing up. The look of utter incredulity on Aethyta's face was making Liara mildly uncomfortable.

"I thought I'd be asking you that. Never really thought you'd ever want to talk to me. Don't know what your mom told you about me. Fuck, kid, I honestly don't know where to begin."

"She didn't say anything about you. She would often become defensive when I brought it up. I thought it might be because..." She let the sentence trail off. She knew her father wasn't ashamed of her, that her pureblood status had never bothered her, but she'd never really considered if it had bothered her mother before today. Certainly her mother had known what she was doing. Though accidental pregnancies _could_ happen during the Matron stage, they were rare. Asari were innately aware of their bodies, and her mother had never seemed the type to not consider every outcome before committing to something.

"It ain't got nothing to do with your blood, kid. We were together for more than a century, thought it was gonna last forever, and when it went bad, it went bad fast. Before you were born. But why are you here now? Just because I'm on the Citadel don't mean shit. They're still gonna watch you. Girlfriend like yours with Cerberus ties, that killed a fucking solar system of Batarians – not that I'd say anything on that, damn slavers – and your work on Illium. Can't say I really blame 'em though, what with your mom and Saren."

"It wasn't her fault," Liara answered automatically, "and I wanted to talk to you about her, really. I...I've been having dreams. About you, and mother."

"Fuck kid, I'm a goddamned bartender not a shrink. I don't do any of that couch shit, and dreams are just there to keep sleep from getting boring. I may be your dad, but I sure as hell ain't the person to be talking to about this."

"It's just...it was about Shepard...and...you always said I could come talk to you if I needed to."

"I did? When the hell was this? But fine, fire away. Don't know how much help I'll be."

Liara launched into a description of her dreams, leaving nothing out. By the end, she was crying, an ache in her chest as she thought of Shepard and the child, of her mother staring out at the water. She hugged herself, feeling suddenly very alone even on the crowded Presidium. The look on her father's face wasn't helping, either. She was smiling and shaking her head, obviously trying very hard not to laugh at her daughter.

"You need me to explain that to you? Come on, the galaxy's going to shit, you're being pulled in seven different directions and the only one you want to be pulled in probably collapses in a tired heap in bed after trying to save it. I mean, I'd want a little downtime with your namesake too if it were me, nothing to worry about but me."

"My...namesake?"

Aethyta slammed a hand down on the table and filled both glasses again. "Goddess be damned, she never told you the story did you? Damn mother's a fucking High Priestess, I spend fourteen months convincing her she'll just give you a fucking complex and then she doesn't even tell you."

"Tell me?" Liara asked tentatively, "Tell me what? My grandmother was a High Priestess?"

"Hell yeah, she was. I mean, I never knew her, passed on before I met your mom, but T'Soni's have been in the church since it began. Your mom was the first not to, decided playing politics was more fun or something. I don't know. Why do you think people listened to you mom? Why they never gave you shit cause I'm your dad? 'Cause you're a fucking T'Soni that's why. A T'Soni named after Athame's daughter no less."

"Athame was a Prothean." Liara said, then, because her mother always forced her to she added, "And we are all her daughters."

"No, we aren't. We are all her children. Big difference. I can't believe she never told you! Hell, I grew up on the story. Damn new generation had to have it pulled in the hope they won't start looking closer to home for a fucking lover. Assholes."

"I'm...not following, father."

"The Tale of Athame's Daughters. Tellak-Yedar'i." The last word was said significantly, with too much emphasis for a child's fairy tale.

"The connected ones are a just a story. They...they don't exist," Liara said, unconsciously reaching out to feel Shepard. The human was above her, on the far side of the curve of the Presidium, and Liara quickly brought her mind back to her self. They were just a story.

"Damn right they are. Not that that means shit, though. Your mother was obsessed with the stories. The young maidens, torn apart, able to find each other again whenever they want. She was such a damn romantic, especially when it came to you. So, she named you after the first one, even though 'Liara' hadn't been a popular asari name in four millenia."

"But..." Liara started before her father cut her off.

"Think of one asari Liara you know. There aren't any. There are six Aethyta's on the Citadel right now. Six. One of 'em ain't even old enough to eat solids yet. Four Benezia's, all older of course. But not a single Liara. And that's because it takes a certain kind of arrogance to name your kid after the Goddess' flesh and blood, but between me and your mom, we had arrogance covered. Not that I approved. Shit no. Wanted to name you Risa." Liara stared at Aethyta, so confused that she felt mildly dizzy. Her father sighed, looking at her. "Look, your dream is just reacting to something you probably heard as a kid, and expounding on your current situation." She sounded very much like the shrink she claimed she wasn't at the end.

"That is what I thought, but now I am not so sure. Father, what I have been trying to ask...who are Athame's daughters? I have never even heard of them. Why would I dream of them?"

"Fuck, kid, you're too old for bed time stories. Drink your damn whiskey and you better not fall asleep on me. Your sister used to do that – my first daughter, she's what...six hundred now? Something that like that. Couldn't stay up past the sex scene."

"You put a sex scene in a children's bedtime story?"

"I was kidding, Athame's tits you take everything too seriously." Aethyta leaned back in her chair, and when she started speaking again there was an almost song like quality to her voice. It washed over Liara and was almost instantly comforting, and the younger woman knew exactly why her sister would have fallen asleep listening to her mother speak, it was hard for Liara to keep her eyes open now. And she was not a child about to go to bed. "In the time before, when the Republics were young and corrupt..."

* * *

_ In the time before, when the Republics were young and corrupt, and the asari were weak and did not know of the changing seasons, and the power they held. When they did not know of science and math and art, Athame walked Thessia. The Goddess spoke to the people, and the people loved her, and in turn she taught them many things that would make the asari powerful. In this time, in a small coastal village there lived away from everyone a maiden. Her name was Salene, and she was considered by all who saw her to be the most beautiful asari to have every left the sea. She was graceful, and she shone with the power of earth. _

_ It came to pass that Athame came to the village where Salene lived and spoke with the people there. Salene came to listen, for she had heard many things about the Goddess, and was curious. She sat in the crowd as Athame taught, and soon discovered that she had found her calling. As the Goddess got up to leave, Salene came to her and begged to become her acolyte. The Goddess did not often take those from the smaller villages, for they were needed in their homes, but the Goddess was taken in by Salene's beauty and allowed her to accompany her when she left the village._

_ For many seasons the two worked together, and Salene became Athame's most trusted of acolytes. They were closest, and loved each other more than anyone else. Salene had never been as happy as she was when she was with Athame, and found their time apart to be painful. But the Goddess was not mortal, and the Goddess was not asari. She had to return to her palace in the heaven's frequently, or she would lose her powers on Thessia. But as she and Salene became closer, it became harder for her to go._

_ Finally, as Athame was preparing to leave, Salene came to her and prostrated herself before the Goddess._

_ "Athame, Goddess of All, I beg you not to leave me," Salene pleaded, "I who love and am loved by you best, do not let me out of your sight. I yearn for you when you are not here, I am nothing but a shell if you are not here to guide me. Take me with you, O Goddess, that I may continue to love you even in your palace."_

_ Athame looked at Salene, who she did love more than all her other acolytes, and was torn. For she could not take her to her palace where mortal flesh would be burned from the maiden's very bones. She knelt beside her love, hugged her to her chest that they may know each other well. "I cannot take you, my love," the Goddess told her, "You must wait for me to return. I shall not be gone long."_

_ But Salene could not handle to be parted, and she wept against the Goddess and begged her not to go. And the Goddess loved Salene, and did not want to go, and so in that moment gave up her powers, her immortality, to be with the one she loved._

_ "I would never have asked such a thing from you," Salene said, touching the mortal skin of Athame, "Who now will teach the asari?"_

_ "I have many Priestesses that can teach, and hundreds of acolytes to help them. And you know well that Janiri and Lucen will not let them fail. I am no longer needed by any but you." And Athame, who had once been the Goddess, kissed Salene to show her._

_ In the way of such things, Salene and Athame were bonded, and returned to the village where Salene was born. There they lived in love, with none knowing of Salene's bondmate's identity. _

_ It was not long before Athame found herself with child. There was much rejoicing in the village, for children have always been precious. And when her time came, Athame had not one, but three daughters._

_ The first, they named Ardala, after the East Wind which brings the summer and all things beautiful. The second they named Irili, after the fearsome beasts of the Umbar plains. But the third they could not name. For Athame wished to name her Yeali, after the West Wind which is calmer than the east, and brings the winter, and Salene wished to name her Berisalt, which in the old tongue meant beauty. But neither name suited the child exactly, and so the child became Nameless._

_Nameless and her sisters grew strong on the love of their parents. But all was not well outside their home. For with Athame gone, the heads of the Republics no longer listened to the Priestesses, and said that the Goddess had forsaken them, for her guides would not tell them where she was. War was brewing in the north, and as Athame listened, she wept._

_ So it was that after their daughters had been put to bed, Salene came to Athame who had once been the Goddess and prostrated herself before her again._

_ "Athame, I who love you best, who know you best, see your pain," Salene said, "And I know that you must go to them. Know that I shall always love you, and that you shall always be welcome here."_

_ "I cannot go," Athame answered, "What of our daughters? They need their mother."_

_ "I shall be their mother, and their father. I shall teach them of you, and how you love them. And they shall look out at the world and see it as beautiful, and they will see your love for them."_

_ And so Athame brought Salene to her breast and kissed her brow. And when at last they stood, it was not Athame, mortal mother, that stood with Salene, but Athame, Goddess of All. And she kissed her lover and went to stand over her daughters. _

_ She blessed them all, and said her goodbyes, and returned to her Palace so that she might regain her powers to save the asari. _

_ Salene raised Athame's daughters, and told them of their mother, and they grew to be three beautiful, strong maidens. _

_ Ardala was quick of wit, but just as beautiful as her father. But, she lusted for power, and when it came time to leave home, she went to the capital of all the republics. Here, many came to her, and she turned none away._

_ Irili grew strong and brave. So, when it came time to leave home, she became a proud warrior. And she traveled Thessia and slew all those things that hurt the villages. And she was wise, and compassionate, and sought only to do good in the world, and was soon known all over the globe. Many paid her for her services, and she owned a large home on the top of a hill where she looked down and waited for the next beast to slay._

_ Nameless was sweet, and kind, and had a heart the size of the sun. None could meet her and not be her friend. When it came time to leave home, she could not, and instead went to her mother's temple in the village and like her father became an acolyte._

_ It was here that Nameless met Yuterl, and as with all who met Nameless they became friends. But though she had spent many decades alone, and had not enjoyed the pleasures of being a maiden, Nameless found that she longed for Yuterl to look at her and love her. And Yuterl did, and their love was surpassed only by the love of Salene for the Goddess._

_ Though they were both but maidens, Yuterl and Nameless decided to be wed. Nameless wrote to her sisters and begged them to return for her bonding, for she could not be fully happy without the support of her family._

_ It was Ardala who received the letter first. And as she read she was unhappy. Certainly, her sister could not be happy settling down so soon. Not when there was so much to discover in the world. So Ardala went home, and found Nameless and cornered her in her home._

_ "Nameless, my sister," Ardala said, "surely you cannot be serious about this. Come with me to the capital. I will show you a world far beyond anything you can have here in this village. Come with me and leave this behind. You have many years to live, and you will not be happy if you spent all of them here on the shore."_

_ And Nameless, not wanting to upset her sister, went to Yuterl. "My love," she said, "my sister wishes me to go to the capital. I love you dearest of all, but will you allow me to go. May we postpone our bonding so that I may go with my sister than she may be satisfied that I love you and shall be happy with you."_

_ And Yuterl was not one to deny Nameless anything, and so Nameless and Ardala went to the capital._

_ The city was large, and sprawling. It was dirty and crowded and not anything that Nameless had ever seen before. As they walked the wide streets many asari came up to her and her sister, and offered themselves to them. Her sister turned not one away, and in this manner it took them many hours to reach Ardala's home. In her home they saw many guests, but Nameless was unhappy. Though many beautiful asari came to her, and loved her, none were Yuterl, and it was her love that stayed on her thoughts. Indeed, her thoughts became more and more focused on Yuterl as she tried to deny what her sister was._

_ For her sister was cruel. Many of the asari that came to her wished to be looked on with favor, but Ardala discarded them all as quickly as they appeared. For Ardala there was always someone new. This is the way of Maidenhood, and at first Nameless understood, but as the weeks passed in her sisters company, she found that she could not bare to see the way that Ardala treated those that came for her companionship. They often left broken, pleading to be allowed to stay._

_ And so Nameless left her sisters side and returned to Yuterl who welcomed her home with open arms. Nameless was home in time that they need not set a new day for their bonding, and Nameless sent out more letters to her sisters._

_ This time it was Irili who came. Irili could not believe that her sister, who had never faced battle, would be willing to settle down. For surely, there was much in the world that could threaten her, and it would be better to know how to kill it. And so she cornered Nameless in her home, as __Ardala had done._

_ "Nameless, my sister," Irili said, "surely you cannot be serious about this. Come with me to my home, and we shall fight the many beasts that threaten the villages. You shall learn many tricks, and kill many beasts. You have many years with which to live, and you will not be happy if you cannot protect your home."_

_ And Nameless, not wanting to upset her sister, went to Yuterl. "My love," she said, "my sister wishes me to go with her to her home, where we may fight the many beasts that threaten the land. I love you dearest of all, but will you allow me to go? May we postpone our bonding so that I may go with my sister than she may be satisfied that I love you and shall be happy with you."_

_ And Yuterl was not one to deny Nameless anything, and so Nameless and Irili went to her home in the mountains. _

_ There Irili taught Nameless many things about fighting, and then they went out into the plains to hunt her namesake._

_ For many days and nights they sat and waited for the beast to appear. On the evening before the day that Nameless was to be bonded, she wept alone thinking of Yuterl, and how she would be happier there with her love._

_ Irili saw this. She felt an ache for the pain she was causing her sister and said to herself that should the beast not appear by noon, she and her sister would return to the village that her sister may be bonded._

_ At dawn, however, the beast did appear._

_ With all her training, Irili charged the creature, and Nameless followed behind. Together they stopped the beast in its tracks, but Irili faltered as she hit uneven ground and the beast was let free of his prison. It charged at Nameless and impaled her on its large tusks._

_ In fury, Irili killed the beast, and ran to her sister who lay on ground staining the grass violet._

_ "My sister," Irili cried as the life slipped from Nameless, "What have I done? Mother! Mother please, come and help your daughter!"_

_ And from the shadow of the clouds Athame appeared by her daughters' side. She took one look at her youngest, and most beloved daughter and a rage the likes of which the Goddess had never felt before overwhelmed her._

_ "Today was to be the day she was bonded," the Goddess boomed, "Why is she here on these plains, left as a sacrifice to the beasts of the land? Why is she not in the arms of her lover?"_

_ "Ardala and I knew she was too young. She is so small, and she had not experienced the world. I wished only to make her happier."_

_ "You have killed her," the Goddess replied, and felt nothing when Irili broke into tears._

_ But death is not something that would hold a Goddess back, and so it was that Athame was able to save her youngest. With gasping breaths, Nameless looked at her mother, "You have saved me," she said, "I can find no words to thank you mother."_

_ "You may thank me by marrying she who is your love," the Goddess answered, and lifted her child in her arms as she had done when the maiden was a small baby. Then, she took her to Yuterl, who looked on in shock as the Goddess appeared at her door._

_ "Yuterl," Athame said, "she is very weak. I ask that you do what you have always done, and care for my daughter. And know this, she is no longer Nameless. She is Liara, which is courage. She is Liara which is bright warmth of the sun. She is Liara, which is love."_

_ And so the Goddess left, and Yuterl did what she had always done and cared for Liara._

_ But the Goddess was not finished with her daughters. She went to Ardala and told her of what had happened. And as she was there, she saw what her daughter had become, what she had tried to make Liara become and struck out against her._

_ "Ardala, look around you. This is not what it means to be asari. You have been blessed with many gifts, and yet you squander them. How many children have you sired, young though you are? __And you claim that it is Liara, your sister, that does not know the meaning of asari? Know this, child of mine, from this day forth, your children shall be cursed. Let all who know cower in fear, for none that you love shall live. When your heart opens to them, you shall lose them. All of your line shall bare this burden, though I grant you this reprieve for I know you were acting in what you thought were your sisters best interests. Not every child shall be marked thus, but they shall have the curse within them, and their children shall bare it, and theirs. And in this manner for all time your sin shall be known."_

_ And so it was that Athame created the Ardat-Yakshi._

_ And then the Goddess went to Irili, who wept over her sister._

_ "Mother," she cried, "What have I done. I ask that you curse me as you have my sister, that I may be punished for what I have done. I only wished to help my sister. I only wished to teach her that which would help her"_

_ And Athame was moved._

_ "I shall not curse you thus, but I give unto you a purpose. Learn from your mistakes, go out and fix them, and help others do the same." Athame laid a hand upon her daughter's crest. "Earn your own forgiveness, for I forgive you already."_

_ And so it was that Irili became the first of the Justicars, fighting, not in her mother's name, but Liara's._

_ And the the Goddess returned to Liara, who had grown quite strong under the care of Yuterl._

_ And at their bonding she stood before them._

_ "My daughter, you are the light of the future. To you I have a gift. A gift that you may never be separated from your love again. Though you go your separate ways, though you journey may leagues apart, you shall always know of the other, and you shall always be able to find your way back. And so too shall your children, when they find they who they love most, be so blessed."_

_ And so it was that Athame created the Tellak-Yedar'i._

_ And Liara and Yuterl lived many happy centuries together, and had many children. And not once, though they both traveled far and wide, were they ever alone._

* * *

Liara grabbed the bottle from the table and poured herself another drink. She'd heard plenty of folk tales involving the Goddess, but this had to predate any of them. Though the Athame doctrine had long fallen out of practice, the stories were still told. Athame teaching Alune mathematics was a cultural favorite, and had been the basis for one of Liara's favorite vids as a child. There was nothing inherently contradictory about this story and those she'd been told as a child, but it just felt out of place with them. Athame was a Goddess, yes, but she hadn't created the Justicar order, or the Ardat-Yakshi. And she certainly hadn't created the Tellak-Yedar'i.

They didn't exist.

She reached out with her mind again, feeling the comforting presence of Shepard at the base of her skull.

But that was different. That was just a chemical imbalance in her brain.

And the Ardat-Yakshi were just a genetic disorder, she reminded herself.

"That's where my mother got my name? But why?"

"Beats me, kid. She always had a fondness for the story, though. Aren't many who know it anymore, those that did have forgotten it. I mean, who wants their all powerful protectors coming down to do the nasty with young Maidens? And then to have her tell everyone that fucking and fighting aren't always the way to go. Well, goes against what the asari stand for now, doesn't it? But yeah, that's all your dream was. Nezzy probably told you the story once when you were no bigger than a seedling, and you forgot. Do your own thing, or what-the-fuck-ever."

"Thanks, dad," Liara answered without much feeling. It didn't sit right with her. Her mother had never told her this story. Had never told her that her grandmother was a High Priestess. Benezia had always seemed to have a bit of a soft spot for the old religion, but Liara had always taken it to be her trying to connect with her daughter. A daughter that had no interest in the now, and had seemed so firmly stuck in the past.

She remembered what her father had said the first time they had met, about making Benezia let Liara go her own own, of not stifling her. And her mother had complied, had encouraged, even, her choices. There had always been that desire, that small comment, that Liara should follow in her footsteps, but it had never been pushed.

Aethyta wouldn't know, and Benezia was no longer around to ask. Coming to her father hadn't solved anything, it had simply made things more confusing. With a sigh, Liara changed topics, wringing out little things from her father, things she'd always wanted to know, or already knew but thought her father might like to talk about. Benezia's indoctrination, Liara being a quarter Krogan (it still didn't work that way), whether she and Shepard were happy.

At first, Liara thought that she had imagined her lover's name being spoken behind the plant she had her back to. But then it was said again.

There was a commotion up by the shops, and both father and daughter turned to look. From the C-Sec office a half dozen turian agents rushed out. They pushed the milling crowds out of their way, one of them unholstering his gun as he did. As they passed by the table, Liara heard the one in the lead talk into his Omni-Tool. "That's right. Shots fired at the Embassy. We have at least one man down, but reports are scattered. Yes, I already said, we have confirmation it was Shepard."

Liara felt cold, her body shook as she listened. Shepard. But Shepard was fine, of course Shepard was fine. She'd know if Shepard wasn't fine. Though she had just spent the length of her father's story convincing herself otherwise, she knew that if anything had happened to the spectre she'd know about it. There was no what she couldn't.

"Kid, go. Follow 'em. That doesn't sound good." Aethyta stood up, taking both glasses and the bottle with her. Liara didn't have to be told twice.

She moved with a speed she didn't know she had, weaving in and out of the people staring at the officers that had passed by them. She caught up quickly, and tried to get their attention. They ignored her, rushing to the skycar lot at the far end of the Presidium.

"Yeah, I've got two teams in marked cars on their way now. I'm taking a third, unmarked, in case they try to run. No, I haven't heard if they're trying to leave, I can't get any reports out of there at all."

She reached out to tap the officers shoulder, when a large hand descended on hers instead. She turned, almost jumping out of her skin. She looked up and relaxed slightly.

"You want to tell me what's going on?" Garrus asked.

"Shepard went to see Udina," Liara said, not bothering to wonder how the turian had found her, "and I think she may have shot him. Or someone. Or something. I don't know." She wouldn't let the panic win. Shepard was fine. She knew Shepard was fine.

"Come on then, T'Soni. I know a short cut."

She smiled gratefully at him, and followed.

The story her father had told her, the story of her name, was already forgotten.


	11. Chapter 11

Shepard stepped off the ramp to the world map and motioned to Williams to follow her. She walked around the far side, stopping briefly as she waited for Ashley to speak with Traynor.

"We'll be here for the next 34 hours. Everyone scheduled for shore leave needs to be back within the next galactic day. And, if you could see about setting up a connection with the council to the QEC, I'd appreciate it. Adams should be able to help you get whatever you need," she told the comm officer. Traynor hurried to get the proper information out to those with leave coming before heading for the elevator to find Adams.

Ashley fell into step beside Shepard as they disembarked. It wasn't difficult to keep pace with the Spectre, even at the quick pace the other woman set. They were docked at the far end of one of the wards, Ashley wasn't entirely sure which one, but the dock wasn't terribly crowded. Security was easy to get through, Shepard's Spectre status got her through despite her side arm and Ashley hadn't grabbed hers before joining Shepard. She felt naked without it, but even though she was Alliance the paperwork to get approval for the weapon would have slowed them down. Something she didn't think Shepard would have appreciated.

Once they were past the guard, and got into the ward proper, she noticed Shepard was almost sprinting. She'd never been very good at reading body language, but it didn't take a super genius to tell that the stiff set of Shepard's shoulders and the grim set of her mouth spoke trouble for whoever happened to get in their way.

"In a bit of a hurry, Skipper? I thought Udina had canceled his meeting with you."

"He did," Shepard answered curtly.

"So, did you get a meeting with one of the other councilors?"

"No. I'm going to go see what Udina thinks is so important that he can't spare me the time he'd already set aside for me. And if I can't do that, I'm going to camp out in his office," Shepard growled, "It's not like I have anything better to do," she added, sarcastically.

"'Course not. Are you planning on turning yourself in?" She wasn't sure why Shepard had this meeting with Udina. She was usually pretty good at weaseling information out of the ships crew – she'd figured out Shepard and Liara before they'd even figured themselves out – but this was something that not even EDI had been willing to spill the beans on. Not that the AI hadn't seemed tempted, but apparently Liara had threatened her with something large enough to keep the ship quiet.

"Are you asking because if I don't you'll be forced to arrest me? Or because if I do, Liara will hunt you down and flay you alive for letting me?"

"Both. Though, honestly your girlfriend frightens me more than the brass," Ashley admitted. As an afterthought, she added, "Are you sure, she's, ya know, still her?"

Shepard barked a laugh, turning a corner and weaving through a crowd of humans and turians listening to a hanar speak on the Enkindlers, "Fairly sure, why?"

Ashley considered the question carefully. There wasn't anything really specific. But... "It's just, the Liara I remember was sweet, goofy. Kind of dorky; she reminded me of my sister a little, only 90 years older. If she hadn't been 106, I'd have wondered if you know, you were breaking intergalactic age law, or something."

Shepard laughed again, but it was more forced. She thought back to the night before they'd jumped to Ilos. They'd both been so nervous, and Shepard had almost felt sixteen and virginal again. And Liara acted remarkably like Shepard had when she _had _been sixteen. Liara's complete alieness hadn't helped matters much, but it had worked out. Better than expected, and it had only gotten better. "I remember."

"Well, I mean, she was..." Ashley tried to think of the right word, but only one came to mind, and it wasn't exactly right, but it would have to do, "...cute."

"Yes. Yes she was," Shepard said fondly, checking a map of the ward. Ashley still wasn't sure exactly what arm of the Citadel they were on, but apparently it had a lack of taxi stands.

"My point is, that's not the word I'd use for her anymore. She's dark, now. Dangerous. Sexy."

Shepard smiled, moving on. "Don't you get any ideas about my girl, LC."

"Funny, Skipper. I don't swing that way," she chuckled. "I guess what I'm trying to get across is that if you just ran into her today, you'd think it was her evil twin sister."

"I know it's her, Williams. I can list the ways, if you like." Shepard looked thoughtful for a moment. "Like the face she makes whenever she-"

"I don't need to know! I trust you!"

"What?" Shepard asked with feigned innocence. "I was going to say the face she makes whenever she's forced to eat peas. I've never seen anyone so adverse to them. She like sugar snaps well enough, but shell them and it's like the apocalypse has come."

"Sure, Skipper. That's exactly what you were going to say," Ashley laughed.

"Look, LC, don't sweat it okay. I know it's her. She's been through a lot, and I guess we stole a bit of her innocence. I wish it wasn't like that, but there's no way to fix it."

"You stole her innocence. I had nothing to do with it. I was safely in cargo bay."

"You have a dirty, dirty mind, Williams. You need to watch some children's vids or something."

"I'd probably read too much into those too. It's your fault you know."

"I won't deny it," Shepard chuckled as they finally approached the rapid transit location. Williams quickened her step, reaching the panel a half step before the Spectre

She tapped in the location, and was just about to take a step back to wait for the cab when she heard the distinctive sound a Predator cocking. She started to turn, but stopped when someone spoke.

"Well, well, well. Look what the varren dragged in. What do you think of it, Jeerek?"

Ashley stiffened, _Batarians_, she thought. She tried to catch a look of the people behind her in the reflection of the window of the taxi that had just pulled up in front of her, but the angle was wrong. She could see Shepard though, and her face was calm.

"Looks like a dirty little human to me, and her little pet, Shish," the Batarian, Ashley assumed it was was Jeerek. said.

"Yes it does, and not just any human. The mighty Commander Shepard. Not as bright as the vids make her out to be, is she?"

"You don't want to do this, gentlemen," Shepard said calmly. Ashley wondered if they were close enough to take them by hand. She wished she hadn't let something as stupid as paperwork keep her from bringing her gun.

"No? Oh, I think we want to very badly." Ashley couldn't tell which one was speaking. She'd never really been able to tell one Batarian from another even when she was looking at them.

"Don't do something you'll regret," Shepard continued.

"Maybe you should have thought about that before you blew up the relay! My wife and daughter were on Aratoht. I think they'd approve of my plans," the other Batarian sneered.

"I've very sorry. I will be punished for that, make no mistake about that. But what I did, I did to save everyone. I didn't have a choice." Shepard's voice caught as she spoke. Ashley had never really considered how much the decision to destroy the relay weighed on Shepard's mind. She'd known it must have, that a person like Shepard couldn't just watch an entire solar system disappear and not be affected by it, but at the same time, it was Commander Shepard. Nothing threw Commander Shepard. Apparently, she'd been wrong.

"Not good enough," snarled one of them, Shish, Ashley thought. She tensed, ready to drop and swipe at the nearest of their attackers. There was a warm pulse just behind her, and the window of the taxi took on a pale blue glow.

As Shepard shot out the stasis field, Ashley dropped and took the second Batarian's feet out from him. His weapon went flying as he landed on his back, and she grabbed it out of the air, pointing it at the Batarian currently caught in Shepard's biotics. Shepard had her Carifax out, pressed against the trapped Batarian's head. Ashley took his weapon from him.

"You have two choices," Shepard whispered to him, "you can walk away and not bother anyone, ever again. And when this is all over you can go home and start over. Or you can push your luck, and lose. I will shoot you if you come near us again. Take your pick."

"We'll leave you alone," the Batarian on the floor said, sitting up. "You don't have to worry about us."

Shepard nodded and dropped the stasis field. Ashley tucked the Predator into the waist band of her uniform pants, un-tucking her shirt to hide it. She handed the other gun to Shepard, who gave it to a C-Sec agent who had finally shown up to investigate. The Batarians argued as the human officer handcuffed them and called for backup to get them to the local precinct. Shepard shot all three of them a chilling smile, and then climbed into the waiting taxi.

"That was unexpected," Williams said as Shepard merged into traffic. She wasn't sure how she felt about letting Shepard drive after all those months of sitting with her while she drove the Mako, but she figured it couldn't hurt to give her a second chance. She changed her mind rather quickly, though, as Shepard started weaving in and out of the sparse air traffic above the ward.

"It went a lot better than I expected, to be honest," Shepard said, strangely quiet. "I knew...I knew what I was doing. I didn't have a choice."

"You won't hear any complaints from me, Skipper."

"Yeah. Blowing up a relay and killing three hundred thousand for the Alliance, A-okay. Saving human colonies from the Collectors on Cerberus' dime? No can do."

Ashley winced. It sounded bad when Shepard put it like that. Cerberus were terrorists. "I-"

"No. That was out of line. I'm sorry." The Spectre sighed. "I just don't like thinking about it. And Liara had a rough night, and I'm just making excuses. There aren't any."

"It's cool, Shepard. I can't say I understand, I don't think anyone could, but I did sort of deserve that."

"No you didn't. Just hit me the next time I say something stupid."

"You girlfriend would never forgive me if I marred that perfect skin of yours. And she's _way_ scarier than you."

Shepard smiled, but it didn't reach her eyes.

It didn't take them long to reach the Presidium, and from there the Embassy. The consulate desk had a single human speaking with the asari worker behind the desk. Otherwise the waiting area was empty. She followed Shepard up the stairs and down the short hallway to Udina's office. A salarian Spectre raised a hand in greeting to Shepard as he hurried passed. Shepard smiled at him, but her face fell as soon as he was out of sight. Her shoulder's slumped as she neared the office door. She stopped in front of it without opening it.

Ashley waited behind her, a number of quips on the tips of her tongue. She didn't say any of them, though she was sorely tempted. She didn't think it would go over well right now. The purposeful look that Shepard had held the entire way over here was gone, and she looked a bit like a lost little girl in her daddy's clothes. Well, if her daddy's clothes were her size.

"Right," Shepard finally said, "You know, I don't need to do this right now. We can go and restock and then come back."

Ashley gave Shepard her best withering look. It wasn't quite as good as the ones she'd seen Liara shoot the Spectre before, but it had always worked on her sisters. "We fought off a couple of idiot Batarians, and more or less ran up here. And now you don't want to go see him? What do you need from him anyway?"

"Access to the Council Chambers," Shepard answered distractedly, "And, I don't need to bother him."

In truth, Shepard couldn't get the image of the Bahak System blinking out of existence from her mind. She'd thought she'd come to terms with everything. The last few weeks had been good for her. She hadn't dreamed of it, and had been able to think of what she'd done without breaking down. She just kept thinking of what the batarian had told her. His wife and child had been on that planet. Along with over two hundred thousand slaves. Innocent victims of slave traders, that had died, not at the hands of their captors, but because she had sent an asteroid careening into the relay. All those lives were on her hands, and she could almost smell the blood on them. She'd seen her share of death. She'd taken more lives than she could count. She'd put more than one bullet into a batarian brain. But this had been different. It had been cold, distant, and she hadn't seen any of their faces. She'd always thought it would be easier if you couldn't see the eyes of the people you were killing. That was why she'd never taken sniper training, even when it was offered after she became a Spectre She could warp an enemy from a fair distance, and that had to be better than looking into their eyes before you put a bullet in them. It had to be.

And yet, she hadn't met a single person on Aratoht. She didn't know any Batarians personally, had really considered them only a half step above the Vorcha in terms of class.

She thought briefly of the batarian she had spoken with on Omega when she'd gone to recruit Mordin the year before. Had he had family in Bahak system? Had she helped save his life only to take his family away? How many families had she broken up? How many children had lost parents? How many parents had had their children torn from them by her hand. She tried to appease the thoughts by telling herself that at least the young children wouldn't have been alone, and they and their parents would have died together.

But how many times had she been separated from her mother as a child? How many times had she been left with her grandparents on Terra Nova, or friends on Earth when her mother had been given an assignment she couldn't go on. How many Batarian children had been on the planet while their parents served on ships throughout other parts of Batarian space?

She shook her head and tried to think of Liara instead. The way her skin had glowed in the light of the fish tank this morning. The curve of her back as she lay on her stomach, fast asleep. Her smile, the sparkle in her eyes when she was happy. The musical sound of her laughter.

How friggin' pissed she'd be if she'd heard that Shepard hadn't followed up on their new lead.

"Fine," she growled, though Ashley hadn't said anything, "let's do this."

She ignored Ashley's chuckle, and strode forward. Udina's asari assistant was at her desk. She'd had her Omni-tool up, and Shepard had a feeling she was playing games on the thing when they'd walked in. She looked flustered when she saw them, and jumped to her feet.

"I'm sorry, Spectre Shepard," she said, "The councilor is unavailable."

"I had an appointment," Shepard said coldly.

"I am aware. And as I said when I spoke to you earlier, Councilor Udina needed to cancel due an earlier meeting. He isn't available."

"He's in there though?" Shepard asked, already moving purposefully toward the back of the office. There wasn't a proper door between the two parts of the office, but an opaque partition could be slid over the top of the stairs to provide the councilor with some privacy during his private meetings.

"Spectre!" the asari shouted, "You really can't go in there."

"Try me."

Ashley followed Shepard, casting an apologetic smile to the assistant. It wasn't her fault Udina was an ass.

The divider wasn't locked, and Shepard pushed it aside with a swipe of her hand. It slid away, revealing Udina at his desk, and familiar figure standing in front of him.

"What the hell!" Ashley yelled, approaching the halo of the Illusive Man. The form turned, his charismatic smile spreading over his features.

"Commander Shepard. Ms. Williams. A pleasure, as always." He turned back to Udina. "I was under the impression that this was to be a private meeting, Donnel."

"This wasn't supposed to be a meeting at all," Udina replied curtly. "As I have been saying for the past half hour, I have other things to do today."

"Of course, my apologies. I was just attempting to render aid, considering the... political ramifications... of Commander Shepard escaping Alliance custody. Cerberus is more than willing to help in any capacity," The Illusive Man said smoothly.

Udina glanced at the two women on the stairs. Shepard saw his face twitch, and knew his anger wasn't with the head of Cerberus.

"The best way for you to help humanity is to put a bullet in your brain," Shepard snarled. Sure, she'd worked with him, had taken his money, but that was when their goals had lined up. For six months they had been tense allies to defeat the collectors. But she would never forget that he had been the one that killed her squad. Not directly, perhaps, but, as her mother had always said, shit rolls up hill.

"Shepard," The Illusive Man drawled, "charming as ever."

She strode forward, forgetting for a moment that he wasn't actually there. She stopped inches from the holo. "I know what you're doing," she whispered. Liara hadn't been very forth coming on all the details, but she had admitted to Cerberus' experiments into indoctrination. She hadn't been sure when, exactly, he had started toying with the premise, but Shepard wouldn't put it past him to have started before she'd even left their ranks.

"Had I any idea what you were talking about, Shepard, I'm sure I'd be able to refute you. Donnel, I'll be in touch." The holo vanished.

"Shepard," Udina said accusingly, "I do apologize for canceling our appointment, but I did cancel it. You cannot simply barge in here whenever you feel like it."

"Don't give me that shit, Udina. You have the cushy job you wanted, so don't toy with me. What the hell are you doing with Cerberus."

"He contacted me. You interrupted before he got to the point."

Ashley, standing a couple feet behind Shepard, snorted. "That's why you're on a first name basis with him?" Shepard glanced behind her, and saw her right arm tucked behind her back. Shepard smiled at her, but shook her head slightly.

"It's not as if my name weren't a matter of public record, Lieutenant Commander Williams. Are you bringing Shepard into custody?"

"Not today, Udina," Shepard said, moving in front of the desk.

"Pity. It would make my job so much easier."

"Your job is to serve humanity's interest as their councilor. How the hell do you expect to do that by working with terrorists?"

"You shouldn't make accusations like that before looking in the mirror first, I think, Spectre," Udina said through clenched teeth.

"I'm not humanity's councilor."

"No, but you are the first human Spectre You had a responsibility, and you worked with Cerberus. You destroyed the Bahak system. Your hands are hardly clean."

The statement was so close to what Shepard had been thinking before walking into the office that it caught her off guard. She took a half step away from the desk, never taking her eyes off Udina. She couldn't let him get to her. Liara didn't trust him, though she wouldn't say why. She said, simply, that it wouldn't matter if things went as they planned. She wished, suddenly, that she'd pressed her lover for more information now.

Udina stood up, walking around the desk. Shepard kept her eyes on him, and from the corner of her eye she saw Ashley turning her head to follow the councilor as well. She was suddenly glad that she had brought Ashley along with her and not Vega as she'd originally planned. If Udina was dirty, she wouldn't want anyone else watching her back. She didn't doubt that Vega could handle himself, and that he wouldn't hesitate if she was in trouble, but nobody hated Cerberus as much as her XO. She hoped he was telling the truth, that they had simply interrupted an unexpected call, but she didn't buy it. Not for a second.

She crossed her arms, and rolled back on her heels. It gave the impression that she was relaxed, almost uninterested. She wasn't quite as quick on the draw with her pistol in this position, but she could fire off a singularity or a stasis field just as quickly as if she was poised for battle. "I did. I won't deny it. That doesn't excuse your working with them, though. I got out as fast as possible. And Kenson's 'Project' was Alliance funded. I just pulled the trigger."

She didn't really believe that, but she would have liked to. It would be so nice to pass the blame for all those deaths onto someone else. She pushed a lot of it onto the Reapers, and that helped cool the sting a little. It was what had kept her going for the last couple of months. Until the batarian at the taxi. And his wife and child. The Reapers hadn't killed them. She had.

Udina smiled coldly. He was standing in front of his desk now, arms crossed in imitation of the Spectre. "My business is my business," he stated.

"Not if it involves Cerberus," Ashley said, finally pulling the gun. She knew better than this. This was the human councilor. But that had been the Illusive Man. And despite Udina's protests, there had been much too much familiarity on both their parts.

"Even if it involves Cerberus," he answered, unphased by the weapon.

"Put that away, Williams," Shepard said slowly. The last thing she wanted was an incident.

"I'm sorry, Shepard. You can't still trust Cerberus?"

"How many times have we been through this? No, I don't. But put the goddamned gun away anyway, Lieutenant Commander. That's an order."

"I'm not on the ship," she said, taking a step forward, "and you're no longer Alliance."

Udina had lost all the color in his face and had dropped his arms. His confidence when Williams had first pulled the pistol was fading now that she wasn't listening to Shepard.

"Get your crew in line, Shepard," he snarled.

"Williams! Now!"

She stared at Udina for another long minute, then dropped the gun to her side.

The tension in the room eased immediately, and Udina smiled again. "Right. Since your here, what is it that you need?"

"I need access to the council chambers. The central control for the citadel is located there."

"I do know that, Shepard. I can-"

He was cut off by a beep in his desk comm.

"Incoming private message from unknown source. Code 716554. Location unknown. Sender unknown. Message to follow." Udina fumbled to shut the message down, but it was too late. "Udina, it's Lawson. I'm not going to make our appointment. Got wind of something personal. Our mutual contact spoke with me as well. Things are go as soon as you green light it."

"Lawson? Henry Lawson?" Shepard whispered.

"It's not what you think," Udina said calmly.

"I think he's almost as bad as the Illusive Man. I think he did a number a little girl that didn't deserve it. I think it's a damn shame that this is going to have to get out." Figuring, given this information, Liara would forgive her for not getting up to the tower and that one of the other councilors would let her up there as soon as they heard about Udina, she turned on a heel and headed for the door.

"Don't even think about it, Shepard. You don't know what you're messing with. You don't understand what they can do. You're a loose cannon, and we can't have loose cannons running around the galaxy unchecked. They can stop the Reapers."

Shepard was hardly listening. She kept walking, not even looking at Williams as she headed for the door.

She heard the gun cock.

She heard Ashley shout.

She heard the sharp sound of the pistol firing.

Once.

Twice.

She heard Udina scream. And then his assistant.

She turned.

Udina was laying slumped over his desk, a red stain seeping out from under his body. A gun hung limply in his hand. He was still breathing.

She rushed over to him, eyes not on the dying councilor but on Ashley She'd dropped her own weapon, and her hands were shaking visibly. Her breath came in ragged gasps.

"I just... I... he pulled the gun. He was working for Cerberus. I... He would have shot you." The last was said with a steel fire, and Shepard watched as Ashley squared her shoulders.

She moved the councilor carefully, pulling off her shirt to stop the bleeding.

"It's okay, Williams. I need medigel. There should be a dispenser in the hallway. Go! Now!"

Ashley was gone in a second, and Shepard bent over Udina. One of Ashley's shots had just grazed the councilor's side, going through cleanly. It was bleeding, but not heavily. The other had hit center of mass. It too had passed through, but the exit would was a gaping hole in Udina's back. She didn't think the medigel would help much.

"Damn it girl," she snapped at the assistant that was screaming in the doorway, "call C-Sec and the hospital. The councilor is dying, you idiot child!"

The asari squeaked, and fumbled with her Omni-tool. Shepard growled, but put her attention back to the bleeding body beside her. She wadded her shirt up and pressed it to the wound on Udina's back. It soaked through much too quickly. She cursed, hoping Ashley would hurry. If they could just stabilize him, get the bleeding to stop, the doctors should be able to save him. A single gun shot was hardly deadly anymore.

She wondered why he hadn't had his shields on, then figured it didn't really matter.

Udina coughed.

"Sir? Relax, we've got medi-gel coming. It's bad, but you should be fine."

"Cerberus," Udina chocked, "base...on my...terminal. You'll...see." He coughed, bloody spittle raining over the desk. "It's for...the...best. Medici."

His eyes rolled back in his head.

"Fuck. Udina? Udina stay with me, they're on their way."

Ashley was back, the medigel container in her hand. She tossed it from the doorway, and Shepard caught it with one hand.

She didn't open it, though.

There was no point.

Udina was dead.

She stepped away from the body, and opened the terminal on the desk. There was blood on the keyboard. She wiped it away with her palm. The password screen blinked at her, and she stared back at it. She felt nothing. She'd never liked Udina, and he'd never much cared for her. But he'd been good at what he did. Or so she'd thought.

She typed 'Medici' into the password field, and she had access to Udina's files. The files she was looking for were buried, but not encrypted. She transferred them over to her Omni-tool without really looking at them. She rifled through the other files on the terminal, transferring some of the ones that she thought might be useful, but for the most part there wasn't anything exciting on it. Not that she thought she could get excited about anything.

She didn't feel bad over his death.

She was more worried for Ashley. The other woman was standing in the corner, staring at Udina's body.

"You did the right thing, Williams."

"I should have shot to wound," she whispered.

"Bullshit. You don't do that; it's a nice way to die. And you know it."

"Yes, Commander."

Shepard didn't bother to correct her. "Relax, Ash."

Ashley nodded, eyes still on the blood stained body in the chair beside Shepard.

There was a commotion outside, and two medics from Huerta memorial came in. Shepard stepped back from the desk, suddenly aware that her shirt was sticking to the congealing mass of blood on the former councilor's back. She glanced down at her bra, wishing she'd worn the protective undershirt that she wore under her armor. She hadn't thought it would be needed today.

It wasn't that she was self conscious. She'd been a marine long enough to not have issues with nudity, but she knew it would probably be hours before C-Sec let them go. If they let them go.

Ashley had just killed the human councilor.

Shepard lowered her head. So much for her perfect day. She crossed her arms over her chest, and sighed. She watched the medics try to revive the councilor, but she knew they were fighting a losing battle. He was gone.

She felt eyes on her back and turned around. She saw Garrus first, towering over everyone else in the room. He gave her a concerned look, shaking his head. Then her eyes fell on Liara. She looked terrified, and Shepard felt sick for worrying her. She didn't know how she'd known, or how she'd gotten here so fast from the ship. Or how she'd met up with Garrus. She didn't really care. She moved slowly, the air feeling like molasses, until she was standing beside her. She wrapped Liara in her arms.

"What happened?" she heard Garrus ask Williams.

"He was going to shoot Shepard," Ashley answered. Shepard felt Liara stiffen in her arms.

"I'm okay," she whispered, hugging her tighter. "I'm okay."

She felt Liara nod against her shoulder, and some of the tension drain from her.

There was shouting out in the hallway, and Shepard pulled back. She smiled softly, and kissed Liara's forehead. "I don't think I'm going to make lunch," she said. Liara choked back a laugh.

"Just come back," she said.

Shepard nodded, and stepped outside to meet the C-Sec agents running through the embassy.

* * *

"In light of the events this morning," Tevos said, "we had no choice but make a full inquiry."

"Though what happened was very sesitive in nature, we will not be suspending your Spectre status," Valern added, "but we feel that until the investigation is complete you will need to keep Lieutenant Commander Williams aboard your ship. It might be best if you leave the Citadel entirely until the investigation is wrapped up."

Shepard looked up, surprised. Liara had brought her a clean shirt while she had been questioned by C-Sec, and she'd been staring at the hem of it while she listened to the council. "Wouldn't it be more prudent for us to stay on the Citadel, in the event that the evidence doesn't exonerate us?"

"We have no doubt of your innocence, Shepard. Udina had video in his office. However, given your recent run from the Alliance, it wouldn't be prudent for us to look like we didn't investigate. Would you rather stay here?" Sparatus asked.

"No, sir," Shepard said, watching all three councilor's smirk at her politeness. She didn't think she'd ever been so polite with them.

"In that case, we will contact you when the results are in. You and Lieutenant Commander Williams can return to your ship," Tevos said. "Dr. T'Soni has informed me that they have already finished restocking your supplies."

Perhaps it was rude not to thank them. They could easily have stripped her of her status. Or locked both her and Williams in a C-Sec brig until everything was complete. And they hadn't.

It really did deserve a thank you.

She didn't give it, she just strode from the room, relieved.

She met Williams in the hallway, and nodded at her.

"Come on, LC. Let's get off this station before you do something stupid."

Ashley winced at the joke. "Shepard..."

"We're confined to the ship until the council reaches a verdict. The ship is not confined to the Citadel. Let's go kick the Illusive Man's ass."

"Aye aye, Ma'am," Ashley said, smiling for the first time since that morning.


	12. Chapter 12

The crew deck was eerily quiet. It had been less than an hour since Shepard and Ashley had returned from the Citadel, but even before they were back on board the news of what had happened had spread through the crew. Garrus leaned against the wall, watching as Ashley tapped a rhythmless beat against the table. Shepard was talking to her, but too low for him to hear. Neither turned when Liara stepped out of her office, and he motioned her over to him.

"She tell you what happened?" he asked.

"A little. They interrupted a call from the Illusive Man. Shepard was leaving when Ash fired, she had her back turned."

Garrus nodded, mandibles twitching slightly as he stared at the human women in the corner. Both were soldiers, and he'd never seen either hesitate in a fight, but he could understand how this could be different. "Do you know where we're heading?"

"Yeah...," she said, trailing off as she watched Shepard lean into Ashley's personal space. She didn't listen to what Shepard was saying, it wasn't important. Ashley's reaction to killing Udina was unexpected. Shepard had taken the shot during the coup. She'd bragged about it to the crew, her chest puffed out like mating robin, but that evening she'd fallen into Liara's bed and confessed that though it had needed to be done, though she was thankful she'd pulled the trigger, she would never forget that he had simply been fighting for humanity; that she was fairly certain he didn't know about how corrupted Cerberus had been. That until the very end he had done nothing worse than she had.

That, in his place, with the Reapers tearing Earth apart, an Earth he had actually _lived _on, she might have done the same.

Liara knew it had just been the emotion of the situation that had Shepard saying those things, the same that had her telling exaggerated stories of what had happened to the crew just hours before. She'd let her vent. Let her cry. And held her and said nothing. And then sent her back to her cabin. The following day, Thane was dead, Shepard was back to her normal self, and everything had moved on.

Ashley, however, had been strangely silent since returning to the ship. She'd spent the last hour since they'd left staring blankly at the table top. She'd seemed fine when she'd first come aboard, walking a step behind Shepard a blazing fire in her eyes. And then Joker had pulled away, said it would take a little over a day to get to where they were going, and she had seemed to shrink. She'd left the CIC without a word.

No one knew what was going on, why there had been this sudden change of character. But Shepard, apparently, had plans to get to the bottom of it.

"Are you going to tell me, T'Soni, or are you just gonna stand there staring at the Commander's rear end all night?" Garrus chuckled.

"I...I was not...I do not know what you are talking about," Liara said, defensively. "We are headed for Cerberus' main base of operations. Udina had the location on his terminal."

"Mmn. You'd think Williams would be a bit less...down...about the Councilor's death knowing that he was connected so deeply with Cerberus. After everything she put Shepard through, I mean."

"It's different when you know them, even a little," Liara said cryptically, walking away from Garrus. Her mind flashed through the people she'd killed over the years, and her mind kept settling on Nyxeris. She'd felt no guilt when she'd killed her, but she'd lost a bit more of herself that day than with any other person she had killed, or had ordered killed. Though she had not even fired a gun since the end of the war, the surprised look on her assistant's face when she'd broken through her barriers was as clear in her memory as what she'd eaten for breakfast that morning. She'd lost most of who she'd been by that point already, but Ashley, she supposed, must have still had some faith in her species.

"Meh. Maybe. Sidonis doesn't weigh on me, don't see why Udina should on Ash. But what do I know?" Garrus shrugged, mandibles flicking slowly. He patted Liara on the shoulder then moved away toward the battery door. Liara watched him, thinking of how she never knew what had happened to him. Or Joker, or Ashley. Or EDI, for that matter, though it was a fairly safe assumption that she'd ended up like the Geth on Earth, piles of scrap metal that had once been a friend. Of course, Tali had eventually thought she'd found a way to reboot their programs. She'd died before she could attempt it, though, and then the fleet had left, attempting to make it back to Rannoch. Liara wondered, briefly, if EDI had kept a secondary backup of herself, and if anyone aboard ship had tried to revive her. If anyone aboard ship had even survived.

Shepard slammed her hand down on the table, drawing Liara's eye back. Ashley was smiling, and Shepard was nodding. Well, at least things were looking up.

* * *

Hours later, Liara was staring at her slowly decreasing chip pile. To celebrate Ashley cheering up, Shepard had called an 'emergency poker session'. She'd roped Liara in to the game with her best kicked puppy look, and had drug Vega out of the shuttle bay when she'd discovered that Amerra was on duty. The lights in the main part of the lounge were dimmed, and the overhead light over the table gave the partitioned room an eerie orange sort of glow that contrasted sharply with the felt on the table. It also gave her skin a sickly look that she didn't like, and she wished she'd left her gloves on before coming back here to play.

"Come on, Lola, flip 'er over," Vega said.

"I am such an enabler," Shepard muttered, flipping over the bottom card, filling out her full house.

"Thank you!" Vega cheered, his bottom card a queen of spades, revealing he had the royal flush he'd been denying since the last round of betting began.

"Sometimes I wonder why we even bother staying," Ashley leaned over and whispered to her, while Vega gathered up the chips, "It's not like we're actually playing, just feeding the pile."

Liara grinned, "Because leaving these two alone together is like leaving a half dozen sixty year old maidens alone in a small room. It's dangerous."

"Look who's talking," Vega chuckled. "I did that extranet search you told me to, by the way," he added, turning to Shepard. Liara tilted her head to the side, wondering at Shepard's reaction to such an innocent statement. She'd gone perfectly still, and was staring at Vega and shaking her head almost imperceptibly. "And she worries about leaving _us_ alone."

"What's this?" Ashley interjected, grabbing the cards off the table and shuffling them.

Vega grinned conspiratorially, "First day I meet Dr. T'Soni, right? She's biting the head off this poor ensign. I get her in to see Shepard, and the next thing I know it looks like she's attacking her!"

Williams turned to Liara, raising an eyebrow. Liara buried her face in her hands and groaned. She'd hoped he'd forgotten about that. She had.

"It wasn't anything, Ash. The Lieutenant is just reading into things that aren't there," Shepard came to her defense, though it was fairly clear she was lying. "It was just a mind meld. Like after Feros."

"Uh-huh," Ashley said, dealing the cards, "And that's why she's the same shade as my Aunt Martha's poodle right after he's come back from the doggie salon?"

Vega laughed at the imagery, "No, they did that after, just before Shepard started talking about time travel. That first time was different."

"First time? Time travel?" Ashley chuckled.

"Let it go, both of you. It wasn't anything. There are just some things that are easier said with the meld. Vega, your bid." That was true enough, Liara thought. Certainly Shepard's attempts to remind her that they weren't alone in the room had gotten through a bit easier once their minds had joined.

"Let what go?" Garrus asked, walking into the lounge. "EDI, lights please." The lights in the main part of the room came up, and he used the added brightness to hunt around the small bar for the bottle of Turian Brandy that he'd hidden there before leaving the ship after the run on the Collector Base. He found it where he'd left it, behind the hidden panel on the left side of the bar, and poured himself a glass.

"Nothing. This conversation is over."

"Not so fast, skipper," Ashley said with a smile, "I just want to make sure we are all on the same page here. You and Liara had mind sex with Vega in the room? Is that what I'm gathering here?"

"No!" Liara squeaked, which did nothing to actually convince either Vega or Ashley of the fact.

"I command a ship of twelve year olds," Shepard muttered. "No. We didn't. Now will you let it drop? Next person who mentions it is going to be cleaning the latrine with their damn toothbrush."

"That's not fair. Garrus, tell her that's unfair. She listens to you," Ashley pleaded.

"Heh. I may just be a soldier, but I'm smart enough not to get in the middle of this discussion. And anyway, if it doesn't end soon, Liara might need to go to the med bay."

The three humans turned to her, her face cradled in her hands as she wished she was anywhere else. This story was going to be across the ship so fast that she doubted she'd ever be able to show her face anywhere on it every again. She blamed Illira, mostly because her yet-to-be-conceived daughter wasn't around to defend herself. Shepard smiled reassuringly, which only made matters worse. Vega and Williams saw it, and began chuckling, though at least Ashley had the sense to try and hide it. "Can we just play?" she finally managed to say, raising Ashley's bet.

"I'll second that," Shepard agreed, meeting her.

"Well, if your love life is off limits, Skipper, what about Vega's other assertion. I mean, we're already facing Reapers. Are we going to be dealing with someone bouncing around in time now too?"

Had the question been asked at any other time, had she not been so embarrassed that she wanted to slink under the table until everyone went away, she probably wouldn't have said anything. Had her mind been more in tune with what was going on, and not focusing on something other than the conversation in front of her, she'd probably have been able to hold her tongue. But it wasn't, and she wasn't, and the words were out before she realized it. "I do not bounce."

Her eyes went wide as soon as she spoke. They were eerily familiar to what she told Joker not long after they'd found Javik, but the situation was so dissimilar as to almost be funny, but only almost. She groaned, folded, and rubbed her temples.

"You?" Ashley whispered, "Honestly?"

"Technically, we all travel in time. Just in a straight, forward line. So, yes, I suppose I do, just like all of you. I think I am going to call it a night." She went to leave, but Garrus was now blocking her way.

"Oh no you don't, T'Soni. Come on, spill," he said.

"You probably don't want her to," Shepard admitted, "It's nothing but one really long headache. The more so when she starts going on about things that haven't happened, and now probably won't happen. I've been living off nothing but painkillers for ages now."

"That's not funny, Shepard." Liara sighed, glaring at her and sitting back down. She'd known she should have said something about Shepard's loose lips back when she'd told Chakwas.

"But really," Ashley pressed, "you're what? From the future? The past? Did you get split into two versions of yourself on Ilos? I felt something crazy when we went through the conduit...maybe there's a past me that's going to take my place."

On the plus side, Liara thought, at least Ashley was taking this in stride. Considering she didn't have the benefit of a meld to convince her the way she had Shepard of her truthfulness, it was a little reassuring. Then again, perhaps not. If this were just a dream, it was much more likely that Ashley would agree with her. It was a really long dream, with all the boring parts still in it, if it was though. The case of food poisoning two days after getting to Sur'Kesh a few weeks before had more or less taken away any doubts of the validity of where she was, but Ashley's ready belief was working cracks into it.

"Future," she mumbled, wondering exactly what horrific changes to the time line this was going to cause.

"Do we win?" Garrus asked, quietly.

Liara looked up, surprised. It was such an obvious questions, and certainly Shepard had asked it in a round about way more than once, but the way Garrus asked threw her off guard. There was no excitement, no anticipation. If anything, he sounded fearful. Garrus, who had stood by Shepard since day one, who had gone to hell and back with her even when Liara had been unwilling, sounded scared of the outcome. She doubted it was because _he _ doubted Shepard, but more a need for reassurance that what they were doing was worth it.

And Liara didn't have an answer.

The Reaper War went down as a victory in the history books, certainly. School children all over the Sol System grew up talking about how Commander Shepard had saved the galaxy. History textbooks dedicated multiple chapters to the six month confrontation that started with the destruction of the Batarian systems. The war with Saren, the so-called Geth War, was given at most a half paragraph. She had fumed for days after Illira had come home from school once and told her that her version of 'What Daddy Did' was wrong. Illira had quickly come to terms with the fact that the author of the book hadn't been there, and Mom had been, and she had quickly informed her teachers of the error. Which had lessened Liara's anger at the publishers, but had gotten her called in to speak with the teacher about Illira's behavior. She had, unfortunately, gotten her father's temper despite Liara's best efforts to leave that out of the map. However, their win hadn't been complete. Shepard had died, sad, true; devastating for her, but that hardly had any impact on the overall war. The Normandy and it's crew was lost, so Liara couldn't even answer the question specifically for Garrus; couldn't tell him if he even survived. The relays had been destroyed, and though they'd been able to physically repair them, no one had been able to figure out how to get them working. The belief that it would be as simple as starting a dormant relay had been quickly put to rest. There had been hope that eventually the asari on Thessia might have been able to get them working – she'd mentioned what Shepard had told her Athyta had said about being able to build new ones – but that was a small hope considering the state of the planet just before the war had ended, and none of the asari on Earth had had a clue of what she'd been talking about. And she knew her people never did anything quickly.

Was that a victory? A small one perhaps. A calm before the storm, if Shepard's memory was to be believed though. She didn't know what to tell him. She didn't know the answer he was looking for. She did, however, know the answer that would make them all feel better.

"Yes," she finally said, looking him in the eyes. She couldn't remember exactly when she'd become such a good liar. Sometime after Shepard had died. Perhaps even after Teiron.

"Damn right we do!" Vega shouted. "We're the badasses of the galaxy, right here."

Shepard watched her, knowing the lie, knowing the truth behind it. She smiled at her, just a quick flick of her lips. She reached under the table and squeezed her thigh, and Liara finally smiled back at her.

"Well, in that case, I think that is cause for a round of drinks. Don't you?" Garrus asked.

"It would be, but everyone needs to get some sleep. We'll be approaching the relay shortly. Last round, let's make it good." Shepard said. It was enough to distract them from their thoughts of Liara, and who she was, and where she was from. The other three went back to the game, and Garrus finally let her up from the table. He followed her, sitting beside her as she waited for the game to end.

"So, the future, huh?" Garrus began, "Anything interesting happen? Anything big?"

"Victus became Primarch," Liara said. She'd never gotten to know him well, though he had come to Illira's first birthday party. Liara hadn't been sure why anyone would celebrate a first birthday, yearling asari weren't any more interesting then they'd been when they were born. On Thessia it wasn't uncommon to not celebrate birthdays until the child was at least five, when they could at least begin to enjoy what was going on around them. Tali had insisted, however, and it hadn't taken Liara to realize that human, and quarian, infants at a year old, while further advanced than her own daughter, were no more interested in the party than Illira. "Shepard brokered a peace treaty between the turians and the krogan," she continued, "and the quarians and the geth," she added almost as an afterthought.

Garrus didn't say a word, though his mandibles flared wide, and eyes widened. Liara chuckled at the expression. They fell into an easy silence, Liara listening to the continuation of the game a few feet away, Garrus trying to process what she'd told him

"That's a joke right?"

"Which part?"

"Victus? Primarch? That would be like Shepard becoming a councilor."

Liara smiled, looking over at Shepard, trying to think of her lover playing politics. It had been very fun to watch, but she wouldn't want to put her through it again. "That's funny, that's almost exactly what she said after she got to know him. It worked out well, though. He was exactly what the turians needed," she sighed, "I wish the asari had been so lucky."

"Mm. I'm sorry."

"No one fared well when the Reapers arrived. But, hopefully, things will be better next time."

"Who wins?" he asked, cocking his head toward the poker table, trying to quickly change the subject, stop her from thinking of the loss of her people. He didn't know what had happened, but he knew that look. He'd seen it just over two years ago after the Normandy had crashed. He didn't like it.

She laughed, "No clue. Shepard was still in custody last time I did this. You were on Palaven."

"And you?"

"Mars. Keeping track of all of you," she said with a smirk.

"It's nice to know you're looking out for us, Liara."

Liara smiled her thanks, and patted him on the thigh as Ashley moved over to join them.

"You know, for someone who always claims to not be able to play, Shepard can bluff fairly well."

"It's much more amusing that you keep believing her," Garrus chuckled.

"Oh, shut it, Garrus. I didn't follow her on a suicide mission."

"Which everyone came back from alive, so...not sure suicide is a good term."

"Did you plan on coming home? No, thought not. Suicide mission."

"Would you two stop arguing for two minutes? You were wrong Liara, dangerous is Williams and Vakarian within fifteen feet of each other," Shepard observed. She'd beaten Vega, and had sat in the corner listening to her friends bicker.

"I stand by what I said, Shepard. The two of you alone together is dangerous. I should know," Liara grinned, before standing up and leaving. She cast Shepard an amused look over her shoulder, catching sight of a gaping Vega standing behind the spectre.

"What did she mean by that?" he asked once the door was closed.

"Beats me," Shepard answered. "Anyway, all of you, you are ordered to forget everything you heard here. That includes you, EDI. Garrus, be ready, we're going to try and get in undetected so just you and Liara with me on the ground team. Get some shut eye."

She caught up with Liara waiting for the elevator. She wrapped her arms around the asari from behind, and rested her chin on her shoulder. Liara stiffened slightly, then relaxed back into her arms. Shepard was mildly amused at how uncomfortable Liara became whenever she touched her on the ship. No matter how many times she did it, Liara still seemed shocked. Liara's confession that Shepard had forced a certain professionalism between the two of them on the ship hadn't been that surprising, really. Shepard did feel a little uneasy whenever any of the crew caught them, and she figured it would be even worse if they had an all human crew. She wasn't breaking any fraternization rules with Liara, but the Alliance did know how to layer on the guilt. As it was, the turians mainly just rolled their eyes and looked the other way, and the asari generally gave her a knowing wink. The two salarians on board were completely uninterested, though Chakwas' assistant did give her a knowing look whenever she stopped by to talk to the doctor.

"So, Doctor T'Soni, I believe I took care of your little problem?"

"Really? Because I can still feel her," Liara laughed, shrugging her shoulders.

Shepard smacked her on the stomach. "Very funny. Nothing like a direct order to make people forget things they shouldn't know, though."

"You didn't?" she sighed, pulling away as the elevator arrived.

"I thought you'd be happy. Though, if you wanted to head up to the CIC and see if anyone noticed..." Shepard let the thought trail off, waggling her eyebrows suggestively.

"You realize that this just means they're going to be thinking of it all the more, don't you?"

"No. They are going to be thinking about the fact that you've come back from the future, and have all sorts of scary information about all of them. They are going to be trying to find out what you know, and will not be thinking about the fact that you have difficulty keeping your biotics in check." She hit the button for her cabin, leaned back against the wall of the elevator and crossed her arms across her chest. Liara thought she looked much too smug for her own good.

"Just what I wanted," Liara sighed. "You know the fewer people who know what happened the less likely it is that I'm going to destroy the time line."

"Well, actually, you've already done that. Or, you actually traveled to a parallel universe, in which case nothing you do here matters anyway in your own time line. Of course, the other option is that time is fixed, and that nothing you're doing will have any effect at all. But that's just depressing to think about."

The elevator kicked them off, and Liara followed Shepard silently into their cabin. Shepard was right, of course. She didn't even recognize this new time she was creating. She rarely even thought about what had happened before; nothing that had happened held any significance anymore, at least not in the big picture. Her memory of what had happened on Cronos the last time she'd been there might be helpful in their upcoming infiltration, but that was fairly small in comparison to what she should know, if things had followed its normal path.

She moved to the shelf behind Shepard's desk and pulled her photo album down from the shelf. Shepard was already stripping down for bed, but Liara sat down in the desk chair and opened the book on her lap. She flipped through the pages slowly, smiling at the memories that she feared, now, would never happen. The pictures hadn't changed. In all the vids she'd watched in her youth, and the ones Illira had made her watch, about time travel, when the past changed, those few connections to the future changed to reflect it. The pictures, however, were the same. She didn't know what it meant.

Had she been moved to an alternate dimension? Was her daughter alone now, unaware that her plan had basically failed. Or was time predetermined? Was nothing she was doing going to make a difference? Would Shepard still die? Would the Reapers still be waiting to return? Was there no hope?

"You miss her," Shepard whispered behind her, reaching over to run a finger over an image of Illira the day she graduated. She was wearing traditional asari graduation clothes – in other words, her school uniform – with a long stole with asari writing down either side. There had been some talk about adopting human graduation gowns, but it had never happened.

"She was the only thing that kept me going for a very long time. It was just years of ballet lessons, and braces and new clothes and sleepovers and homework. When we started fighting, it...I did not understand it, Shepard, why she could not understand why I did what I had done."

"It's normal for children to rebel against their parents," Shepard reminded her, and Liara smiled.

"I've heard that a few times in my life," she chuckled.

"We'll get you back to her, Liara. You'll hold her again, I promise."

Liara looked down at her daughter one last time and then shut the book. "And so will you. That's why I'm here."

"I thought you were here to stop the Reapers from sending their secondary force out of dark space and keeping their promise to wipe all organic life from the galaxy?"

"That too."

Shepard chuckled and stepped back to let Liara out of the chair. She watched as she put the book away, then wrapped her in a hug. "I spoke with Dr. Chakwas again today, just before the game."

"Shepard, I wish you wouldn't do that."

"I can't help myself. It's my job to make sure you're okay. Even after I'm gone."

Liara sighed and leaned her head against Shepard's shoulder. In the weeks since she'd first confessed her illness to Shepard, the spectre had taken it upon herself to spend a bit too much of her free time in researching what was wrong with her. She'd spoken with the doctor at least weekly, and Chakwas had used those visits as excuses to have Liara come in to give blood for more tests. The tests had yet to lead to anything, not that Liara was surprised. Shepard, however, had not seen the futility of it and kept pressing.

"My father had an idea of what was wrong with me," Liara said into Shepard's neck, "In a round about way, I suppose. She seems to think I'm infected with a folk tale."

"When did you speak with her?"

Liara sighed. So much for keeping that a secret. "Today. That's where I was when I heard about what happened to you. It was amusing, and as useful as anything Chakwas can come up with. Please, Shepard. Just let it go. Please?"

Shepard pulled back and smiled. She leaned her forehead against Liara's and whispered, "No."

"You are infuriating, Shepard," Liara sighed, though her voice was loving. Shepard thought she sounded a bit like she was talking to a unruly toddler.

"And you love me for it."

* * *

The Illusive Man read the feed that had just come in from the Citadel. Udina was dead.

It was unfortunate. Though he had not been close to anyone long enough for them to be considered friends in decades, Udina was probably as close as they came. It was clear that the council's investigation of Shepard was nothing but political game playing, and that the spectre wouldn't actually face punishment. Or Lieutenant Commander Williams for that matter. At least not from the council. The Alliance might press charges, but considering the mostly blind eye they were giving Shepard that too seemed unlikely. It wasn't anything more than he expected though.

He closed the feed and brought up the reports from the robotic facilities. Things were progressing well, and Eva would probably be up and running in a matter of days. It had been slightly more difficult to build than the Enhanced Defense Intelligence, as they hadn't had the Luna module to begin with. However, the team was as good as they claimed, and things going well.

He tapped into the security feed in the lab, and leaned forward. Something was not right.

The lab was empty. The body they had built, originally to infiltrate the Mar Archives, but considering the Shadow Broker's seemingly amazing find, and the Alliance's gung-ho attitude to building what she'd found, her parameters had been changed to enter the device construction site.

That information was supposed to be so highly classified that no one actually knew where it was, even the people working there. However, Udina had been able to get him the coordinates. The former councilor had been very helpful after Shepard's run from custody. He had never shared Udina's dislike for the former Alliance commander. Certainly, he thought she was wrong, that what she was doing was dangerous and was unlikely to work, but dislike her? No. He respected her, almost thought of her as a daughter. Parents often disagreed with their children, but more often than not the children eventually came around to their parents way of thinking one way or another. He was willing to give her the time to discover he was right for herself. Once the Reapers arrived... then she'd see.

He flipped through the rest of the security feeds, trying to find either the science teams or Eva's platform. It didn't appear on any of the monitors. He flipped through the other decks of the station, but couldn't find her there either.

He was about to contact the science team when he heard the door behind him open.

He turned, pulling the gun from under his seat. He didn't raise it when he saw who was standing there.

Eva bent slightly at it's waist. It didn't look much like the real Eva had, not really, but it certainly looked human, he thought.

"I have tapped into the stations external monitors," it said, "We are getting reports from some of the scout ships on the edge of the system. The Normandy is less than three hours away at sub-light speeds. I am unaware as to why it is traveling so slowly."

"Because even with it's stealth systems it would trip the sensors closer to the station. Someone on board knows what they are doing."

He turned and looked out at the sun before him. This was destined to come. It was unavoidable.

"Shut it down," he told the scientist that had entered behind Eva, "Purge it, and upload the virus you've been working on. I'll be on my ship if you need to contact me. We'll be heading for Horizon."

He stood, walked past the machine and the man by the door, and regretted nothing.

Shepard watched the ship leave the Cerberus base and cursed.

"That'll be the Illusive Man. Joker, I'm going to take the shuttle and get aboard the base. See if you can follow that damn ship and take it down. Ash, don't let the asshole get away."

"Aye, aye, ma'am," Williams said, trading places with the spectre behind Joker's chair.

Shepard nodded at Garrus and Liara and the three of them made their way down to the shuttle bay.

Joker waited until the shuttle was safely away from the ship then quickly followed the heat trail left by the other ship. It hadn't entered FTL, yet, probably so as not to draw attention to itself and it was easy enough to keep up with it.

"This feels strangely satisfying," Joker told Ashley as they closed in on the smaller ship.

"Very. See if you can open a comm link."

"Comm link enabled," EDI announced.

"Cerberus vessel, this is Normandy. Under Council regulations prepare to be boarded."

"Normandy, you are out of your jurisdiction. The Terminus Systems are not under council control."

"I don't think anyone is going to care if we blow you out of the sky," Ashley said, "so, I think maybe you should surrender peacefully."

The other ship closed the comm. Joker looked over his shoulder at Ashley. "What do you think?"

"I think it looks like they just fired on us, don't you?"

"Sure does, ma'am. Firing all batteries."

It didn't take much for the ship to become incapacitated. It took less time for a group of turian and asari from the Normandy to board and find the entire crew dead. It took quite some time to find the Illusive Man. He was sitting in a back room of the ship, bloody foam on his lips. Dr. Chakwas' assistant was called for, and he and Ashley joined the boarding party to look at the body.

He was slumped against a wall, his face contorted in pain.

"Poison," the salarian said as he squatted down next to the body, "capsule in the molars. Common technique. Immediately fatal." He leaned in closer, "Jaw was slammed shut. Bruises on the jawline. Not self inflicted."

Ashley snorted, "That would be too easy. Whoever did it is dead now, though. Joker, see if you can get someone out here to clean up this mess. Let's go get Shepard."

She kicked the body,it fell sideways. She smiled. She'd been upset about killing Udina, she'd never liked him, but had always thought that it was simply because he was a politician. It had never occurred to her that he might be working for Cerberus. This, though, this felt good.

She knelt down beside the body. "Thanks for paying to bring Shepard back, you asshole. It was the least you could do after everything else you did."

She smiled as she walked back to the Normandy.


	13. Chapter 13

Liara paced the back of the shuttle, talking softly to herself. Her memories of the attack were fuzzy at best; the attack on Thessia had still been so fresh in her mind that she could hardly remember what had happened as they'd approached Cronos the first time. She did remember that they had had a very large fleet backing them up led by Hackett. Looking out at the empty space around the station now, she felt uneasy. The Normandy had gone off in pursuit of the single ship that had left the station as they'd approached, and certainly they couldn't have gone unnoticed. So why then, she thought, weren't fighters coming to attack their defenseless ship?

Not that she was complaining. She didn't want to be shot out of the sky.

She did remember that EDI had gone with them, and had ended up saving their lives...somehow. They didn't have that option today. EDI's body was somewhere in the unknown, still Dr. Core. Liara smiled to herself as they grew closer to the station thinking that at the very least she had already saved the lives of the scientists on Mars. The thought eased some of her worry.

"Shepard," Garrus asked, "is it just this old soldier, or is this just a little too easy?"

Liara smiled at the echo of her own thoughts. "No. They should have attacked by now."

Garrus looked at her, surprised that she'd noticed. But she'd been here before, and the empty skies were disheartening.

"Be glad they haven't, but be on guard as we get closer. It could be they saw the Normandy leave and simply haven't picked up on us yet. Or it could be that the entire base was evacuated with the Illusive Man."

"That ship was hardly large enough to house the entire base, Shepard," Liara reminded her.

"Doesn't mean that they didn't send off a few more earlier."

"The Illusive Man doesn't seem to be one to go down with his ship, or his terrorist organization headquarters," Garrus muttered.

Shepard grunted in affirmation, she hadn't believed what she'd said either. No one in the shuttle seemed to breathe as they approached the hanger. They braced for impact, but as they arrived the bay doors opened and they landed in relative ease. Shepard reached for her gun, even as she held her biotics at the ready. Liara wanted to say something to ease her disquiet, but she had done the same thing. The pistol felt much too small in her hands.

The shuttle door opened, and the three ran instinctively for cover. No one fired. The hanger was quiet. Liara heard the creak of metal and almost set off a singularity toward to noise before realizing it was the shuttle doors closing. This wasn't right. She'd had to deal with Shepard mothering her the entire way to Earth for the bullet graze she'd gotten on her arm. Of course, neither had known at the time that Liara had been pregnant already, and that had the graze gotten infected it could have harmed the baby. Had they, of course, Shepard would never have allowed her off the Normandy at all. Wouldn't have allowed her on the ground team on earth, and then things would have been very different.

For one thing, she wouldn't have been back here, at Cronos, wondering why no one was firing at them.

The door at the end of the hanger opened, and Liara rolled from where she was crouched behind a crate to the other side of the room to get a better look.

"Get the fuck down, Liara!" Shepard whispered when she saw Liara stand up. The spectre watched as Liara holstered her gun and began walking toward whoever had entered the hanger. "Shit, Garrus, cover me." Shepard growled as she rolled over to the place Liara had just vacated, and saw what had caused Liara's reaction.

There were Cerberus troops entering the hanger. They were all armored, but disarmed. A few held their helmets dangling from fingertips. They shuffled forward as one many legged creature. In the gaps as they moved, Shepard could see what had made Liara stand up.

They were being ushered forward by a group of asari commandos.

The asari got the Cerberus troops to kneel in one corner. As they did, Shepard noticed that though there was a full unit of asari, there were also a smattering of batarian and humans with them.

One of the asari, a little taller than her companions, and clearly the leader, broke away from the group and approached Liara.

"Dr. T'Soni. I was told you might be arriving, though we didn't expect you for a few more days. Kil'ren Oralis, Omega Six," she said, holding her arm out to Liara. Liara took it, a little taken aback.

"Omega Six? You're Aria's?" She heard Shepard gasp behind her, but didn't think much of it. She was well aware of the work Shepard had done, and would have done, for Aria. It was surprising that she'd sent her team here though. Omega Six were Aria's pride and joy, and she'd trained them well. Despite appearances if you walked into Afterlife, almost to a one the dancers in there were trained huntresses. Liara always thought that making them dance was Aria's way of making sure they didn't overstep their bounds and try to overthrow her.

"She sends her regards, and told me to tell you she owes you one. And that you'd know what she meant."

Liara smiled, "I was under the impression we were now simply even," she said, glancing over her shoulder at Shepard. The human woman was watching the exchange, her face a mask of confusion.

"If I were you I'd accept it. Aria doesn't hand out favors often. If I may ask, why are you here so soon? I'm not complaining, you're unexpected arrival made taking the station fairly easy, but I was led to believe we were going to be handling this alone."

"The human councilor was recently discovered to have Cerberus ties. We needed to do some house cleaning," Shepard finally spoke up.

"Commander Shepard!" Kil'ren smiled, finally seeing the woman standing behind Liara, and turning form Liara offered her arm to the spectre as she had to Liara. The asari greeting was lost on Shepard, though, and she took the asari's hand in a human handshake. Liara smirked and went in search of Garrus. It wouldn't do to have the sniper accidentally take down one of Aria's people. Not when the pirate queen 'owed her one'.

"What is Aria doing here? How'd she even find it?" Shepard asked, suddenly wondering if she could have done this months ago by simply asking Aria. The ruler of Omega had seemed to have a bit of a soft spot for her.

"The Illusive Man broke the only rule on Omega. It didn't take much, apparently, to find that he had broken it more than once, and find out where he was."

As Liara and Garrus returned, Shepard started walking into the station proper. Kil'ren walked in step with her, Liara and Garrus a step behind. "You have him here? We saw a ship leave."

"I had people stationed on it already. They'll have taken care of everything. I'm sorry we denied you the pleasure."

"I was looking forward to it. I'm sure I'll get my chance later."

Kil'ren stopped, and Shepard walked a couple more feet before realizing she was alone. She turned. "What?" she asked in response to the look on the commando's face.

"We had orders not to leave him alive. His role in Liselle's death didn't get him the leniency we showed the men you saw in the hanger. When we come across Manning, he'll suffer the same fate. Still can't believe we let him get away," she grumbled.

"The Illusive Man is dead?" Shepard whispered.

"I received a report that the team on his ship was successful. I believe they joined your crew aboard the Normandy. I always find it strange that humans can't tell us apart. They didn't have any trouble passing as your crew, but I won't make you keep them," she said with a smile.

"Is Kai Leng here? My sour- I had heard that he was in the Kepler Verge." Liara asked after a moment.

"It's possible. Aria seemed to think he'd be here, but he wasn't our prime target."

"Don't fuck with Aria," Garrus muttered.

Kil'ren smiled at him, "Exactly. I must say I'm surprised to see you alive, Archangel. I almost came looking for you myself once or twice."

Garrus tried to stare her down, but she just continued to smirk at him. He finally growled and looked away, much to Shepard's amusement.

"I guess you did our job for us. If you and your team don't mind I'm goin-"

"Comm- Spectre Shepard," Joker interrupted, "Man, can I at least call you Commander over the comm? I hate trying to remember."

"No, Joker. What's going on?"

"We're heading back, wanted to see if you needed reinforcements."

"Not needed. But you may want to have Ashley do a quick personnel check. I'm led to believe you may have some stowaways." There was a long pause on the other end of the line, and Shepard could just make out Ashley's curses.

"No shit?" Joker said a moment later, "She's going now. Time to rendezvous fourteen minutes. Need us to hang back?"

"No, I'll send the shuttle to pick up the extras," she laughed.

"Aye, aye, ma'am. Oh, and uh...shit, Ashley was supposed to handle this. We, uh, found the Illusive Man."

"And he's dead." Shepard said, matter-of-factly.

" And, you see- what, how the hell'd you know that!"

"I have my ways, Joker," Shepard laughed.

"You're getting to be as bad as Liara. It's no fun anymore," he complained, cutting the line.

"What I was going to say, was if you and your team don't mind, I'm going to see what we can salvage from here. Get what data we can, and have the Alliance take down any remaining cells. I'll keep them out of your way, of course."

Kil'ren smiled, "Be my guest. We have what we came for. Dr. T'Soni. Archangel." She nodded to each in turn before heading back into the hanger. "Oh, and shall I send your shuttle back to pick up my people?"

Shepard nodded, and led Liara and Garrus deeper into the station.

They walked in silence, occasionally running into the bodies of dead Cerberus soldiers, but for the most part the hallways were empty. It was difficult to believe that a battle had even happened here, and Liara wondered if one actually had. Faced with some of the best trained fighters in the galaxy, with their leader on the run, it wouldn't be surprising if the men left behind on the station simply surrendered. Joker contacted them again while they were going through files in a medical bay, and they sped up their search.

It took a little over two hours to do the quick search of the entire station. Shepard was downloading what she could from the Illusive Man's terminal when Liara saw her. She almost hadn't recognized it at first, as the human epidermis was still in tact. She tapped Garrus on the arm and led him over to the corner where the body was slumped unnaturally.

She was dressed in a science officers uniform, the Cerberus crest on her shoulder. Her hair was a rats nest of tangles, and her face was contorted in a grimace.

"I don't see any blood," Garrus said, kneeling down beside Eva. "What happened to her?"

"They turned her off," Liara said, "She's an AI."

"Did us a favor then," he muttered, eying the body.

"Grab it. EDI can use it. And Joker will forgive Shepard for being one up on him," she said with a smile.

"EDI can use it? Do I want to know how?" he asked, tossing the body over his shoulder, "Damn, it's heavy!"

"I'm sure you can handle it. Vega carried her by himself without complaint."

That stiffened the turians backbone, and he adjusted Eva's weight on his shoulder. If James Vega could carry her, well, Garrus Vakarian could not only carry her, but carry her in style. Liara grinned as she watched him adjust the body until sat comfortable across his shoulders.

Shepard stood up, and nodded to Garrus, "Short it out. And what the hell is that?"

"It's a gift for EDI," Garrus answered as the screens behind them went dark. "Or so Liara says."

"If you say so," Shepard muttered, shaking her head. "Let's get out of here."

They made short work of getting back to the hanger. The Cerberus prisoners were gone, as were most of Aria's soldiers. A couple of asari sat on a crate, and a batarian was pulling something out of one of the fighter's in the middle of the hanger. One of the asari raised a hand in greeting as they arrived, but it fell slowly as she saw Liara. She slipped down to the floor and walked toward the trio slowly. Garrus moved past her to the shuttle, Shepard close behind him. It took them both a moment to realize that Liara hadn't followed them.

"Is it really you?" Teiron asked, stopping a couple yards from Liara.

Liara didn't know whether to run to her, or run away. The indecision left her rooted on the spot. How long ago had it been now since she'd seen this woman, this woman that had loved her and lived with her, and had let her go.

"I could ask the same," Liara said, eyes darting to Shepard, who had turned around and was coming back, "I thought your biotics were...," she trailed off, it had been so long she couldn't remember what the woman in front of her had said, though the night still stood out brightly in her mind.

"As bad as a humans? They are. But someone has to keep him in line," she said, nodding at the batarian. He'd stopped what he was doing, and was watching the two of them as intently as Shepard was now.

"Oh," was all Liara was able to come up with. She'd moved on. Of course she had. Just because Liara had been unable to get over Shepard didn't mean that Teiron wouldn't have been able to get over her. That was foolish maiden thinking. Not that it mattered anyway. She had been using Teiron, after all. It was comforting, though, to think that Teiron hadn't been on Thessia when the Reapers hit. Though, it was possible, if she had been working for Aria, that she'd been on Omega. In either case, chances were the last time Liara had lived through the Reaper War, Teiron had been dead.

Their brief, fleeting love affair had kept Liara going much the same way Illira had kept her going after the war. It had only been a few months, and most of that time had been nothing but drinks on the weekend, but Teiron had been her friend. When she'd thought she was completely alone, and that the only hope she had was a quick death while trying to kill the Shadow Broker, Teiron had shown her that there might have been something worth living for. And it had all fallen apart.

"Yeah," Teiron agreed. The tension was almost palatable. There had been no harsh words when they'd gone their separate ways. No accusations or desperate pleadings. Just one, long, tear stained kiss and they'd never seen each other again. Liara had expected to never see her, ever. Though she'd never forgotten her, Liara had filed her away. Teiron sat in the same part of Liara's brain that contained the crush she'd had on her teacher when she'd been no more than thirty. Unlike her teacher though, Teiron was the mark of her failure. The proof that she couldn't get better, no matter what Shepard tried.

Because she had tried. Weeks of doctors appointments and tests and scans that eventually had bled into each other to become just a long month of wanting.

She loved the woman before her.

She loved her much the same way as Shepard. Or she had. Once.

But that hadn't been enough.

Liara wasn't upset at her inability to maintain her relationship, if you could even call what they had once had that, with the other asari. Even then she'd been able to admit to herself that though she loved her, she had every intention of just using her. They had both known that, had been okay with it, but now, all these years later it seemed cruel even to think about it.

"Are you going to introduce me?" Shepard finally broke their silence. Liara wanted her to come over to her, wrap an arm around her shoulder and lay claim. She wanted her to become jealous and possessive and to drag her back to the shuttle and away from a past that didn't matter anymore. She'd had Shepard's baby. She had raised their daughter. She had lived her life, and this woman, this woman who had been so kind, so understanding had no place in it. And that broke Liara's heart, even as it made it swell with happiness that she had Shepard back, something she'd never thought possible the day she and Teiron parted ways.

If that was so, though, why did Liara feel as if her heart was beating in her throat? If it was all just old history, why were her hands shaking?

"Um, Shepard, this is uh...um...this is-"

Teiron smiled and saved her from answering, "Teiron Riela, Commander. I've heard a lot about you."

Shepard looked at Liara, eyes wide. The question was obvious, and Liara nodded slightly. She didn't know how she felt about this, not really. She had never thought about it. The idea that her lover, and a woman she once loved, might ever even be in the same room had never occurred to her. There was no reason for it, and that it happened now seemed a cruel twist of fate. Of all the asari in the galaxy, Aria had to hire this one. Despite her having never gone through training, despite the fact she was the self-proclaimed 'worst asari ever', Aria had sent her here.

A sinking feeling developed in her stomach. The idea that Aria _knew_, and that was why Teiron was here. That this was all some game to her.

"Really? All good I hope?"

"Other than your taste in liquor, it was all wonderful, I assure you," Teiron chuckled.

"My taste in-? What's wrong with what I drink?" Shepard demanded, spinning to look at Liara.

"Nothing! I never...I didn't..." Liara rubbed her temples, sighing. Of course they'd get along. It was too much to ask that they hate each other and Shepard to grab her and drag her away.

They both smiled at her, and Liara noticed how similar they were. It had been what had drawn her to Teiron in the first place. Shepard turned conspiratorially to Teiron, and leaned down, her grin widening. In a mock whisper she said, "Did you teach her that thing with her tongue?"

"Shepard!" Liara yelled, flushing purple. Why couldn't she just have a normal, jealous girlfriend? Goddess, why?

Teiron, at least, had the good grace to look taken aback. "I...no, I can't say I did. I mean, we never...it wasn't...what did she tell you?"

Shepard smiled again, and patted Teiron on the back, "Nothing embarrassing, I'm sure."

The batarian had come over and was standing a couple feet away his arms crossed. He was glaring at Shepard, and Liara hoped it had nothing to do with Aratoht.

"Um," Teiron said, eyes wide, "I uh, this is Heleerk. He's a good guy, when he controls his temped," she said pointedly in the batarian's direction. The man rolled his eyes and went back to the ship he'd been dismantling. "Shit, Liara, I spent the last year since I heard she was alive thinking I'd have to look out for a knife in my back."

Shepard laughed, "It's funny, when I saw Liara again for the first time, I thought the same thing about you."

The two women stared at each other, then they both nodded, a simple understanding passing between them. They both loved her, but she was Shepard's. Liara watched them, wishing she'd just kept walking.

"Take care of her," Teiron finally said, heading toward Heleerk, "She deserves it."

"I never planned on anything else," Shepard answered. "Come on, Liara. I want to know exactly what it is you have against my alcohol."

Back on the shuttle, Garrus had dropped the body unceremoniously on a seat, and was standing beside it. Shepard closed the door behind her, then settled down next to Eva.

"I like her," she said, "I think she'd be good for you."

"Don't, Shepard. Please," Liara pleaded, "Not here. Not now. It was years ago, and I've told you. There isn't anyone else."

"Uh, I miss something?" Garrus asked, eyes darting between the two of them.

"Liara's exgi-"

"Shepard, please," Liara said again, her voice cracking this time. She wasn't going to cry. There was nothing to cry about. A failed, broken romance so long ago she could barely remember most of it was not something to cry over. Not when she had Shepard sitting in front of her. Shepard, who she loved more than anything in the world, and who loved her in return. Shepard, who made everything just so much better. She was here. She was alive. She was perfect. She kept the tears at bay, but not the dry, choked sob. She sank into the seat across from the others and buried her face in her hands.

She had never expected it to hurt. Not when Shepard had come back. And now three hundred years had passed. She had a daughter, a beautiful, intelligent, wonderful girl who was going to be a father. She had a life with Shepard. It had been taken from her, twice, and she'd gotten it back both times, and the torn life she'd left behind on Illium was supposed to stay away. It wasn't supposed to hurt.

The others didn't say anything as she sat there, thinking that life was never fair. She didn't want anything from Teiron, didn't want to go back. She certainly didn't wish that things had worked out with them. And yet, part of her still loved her. That was clear from the ache in her heart. She felt a warm, comforting weight settle on her shoulders and felt herself being pulled into a tight hug.

"I keep upsetting you. I'm sorry."

Liara shook her head, wrapping her arms around Shepard's waist. Garrus was forgotten, the fact that they were on the shuttle was forgotten. Even Teiron was forgotten as Shepard held her.

"Do not worry about it. It is better than if you had tried to kill her. I was just not expecting to see her."

"You see why I have to keep trying to make you better now though, right?" Shepard whispered. Garrus had moved to the back of the shuttle, letting them be as alone as they could in such a small space.

"No, I don't," Liara sniffed.

"Honey, she was _cute," _Shepard said in her best nosy-grandmother voice. Liara simply glared at her. "Oh come on, smile. I'd have slept with her," she teased.

Liara scoffed and smacked her, and they both heard Garrus choke back a laugh. He had been trying very hard not to listen in, but it was difficult in such a small space. Shepard smiled over Liara's shoulder at him and shrugged.

Liara refused to say anything else, no matter how much Shepard tried, not even when she became sincere about it. She didn't know why Liara was so upset. If their roles were reversed she'd much rather have had Liara be accepting of the fact that she had a past rather than become overbearing. Teiron seemed like a nice girl, and Shepard liked the idea that she and Liara would have actually been able to grow old together. She couldn't offer Liara that, and she had made it her duty to make sure that Liara wasn't left alone again. She was actually a little ticked off at herself for getting Liara pregnant during the war as it was, – never mind that it hadn't actually happened yet – knowing that it was unlikely that she'd come back, and that even if she did Liara would still be left with the care of their child after she was gone. It seemed cruel and heartless, and Shepard couldn't imagine what had prompted her to do such a thing.

When the were on board, Ashley was waiting for them. Liara pushed past her, ignoring the soft "Are you okay?" the lieutenant-commander sent after her, and the startled look. Shepard felt like an ass, and wanted nothing more than to go after her.

"Take that to the med bay. Have Traynor see what she can make of it," she told Garrus before turning to Ashley. "Tell me what happened."

"We didn't even think, when they dropped the comm link, that it was anything more than them just ignoring us. We disabled the ship, and I sent a team over. Everyone was dead, the entire crew."

"Except for Aria's henchmen," Shepard corrected as the elevator, which Liara had taken to the Crew Deck, returned.

"Aria? Aria T'Loak? The head of Omega? What does she had to do with all this?"

"I guess you could call her an old friend. Continue, please, Ash."

"Right, well, no one noticed when they came aboard. Half a dozen more asari more or less, no ones going to look twice. None of them would tell us who killed the Illusive Man, though."

"It doesn't matter. That was what we were planning on doing, anyway."

"I guess, but it's still frustrating. I wanted to shake her hand."

Shepard laughed, following Garrus off the elevator and towards the med bay. "What happened to that straight laced Alliance soldier I met on Eden Prime?"

"She was kidnapped by the Shadow Broker, I think," Williams replied, glancing across the mess towards Liara's office. "She okay?"

"Ran into an old girlfriend."

"Oh, ouch. She must of known, I mean, yeah, she's a 109, and you're what, four, in asari years? But she didn't think you were a virgin did she?"

"Not mine, hers. And I promised I wouldn't talk about it. And I'm much closer to fifteen, thank you," she smirked.

Ashley gazed at Liara's door with new appreciation. "Well, little Liara really is growing up."

"Shut it, LC, and help Garrus with this thing. Liara said that EDI might have use for it."

Across the hall, sometime later, Liara stared at the monitors distractedly. Feeds from her various agents were coming in, and she was certain she was reading them, but she wasn't retaining any of it. She read the same report that the science team on Eden Prime had discovered the stasis pod four times before it registered. She read it another six before the information that they had rebuffed the first wave of Cerberus soldiers sank in.

She felt uneasy. She just wanted to curl up and sleep, but she was much too wired. She felt drained and overstimulated at the same time.

Flashes of Illira kept breaking her concentration, mixed with memories of conversations had at a bar table, or her dinner table, or on the sofa of her small apartment. They'd fade to thoughts of Shepard, of the life they'd once spoken of having together. She never spoke of it now. She'd let herself be drawn into the conversation if Liara started it, but she never brought up the life they would have together. There were no more little blue babies mentioned in passing, no more promises of marriage and old age and a house on the water. She was more affectionate then she had ever been, but Liara sometimes felt that Shepard didn't expect to wake up in the morning. It terrified her.

She knew she'd have to talk to her about it. Meeting Teiron just reinforced that. Shepard was acting much too much like an asari.

Resolved to corner Shepard immediately, and demand answers, she headed for her office door.

It didn't open.

She tapped the button on the side, thinking perhaps the motion sensor was broken, but the door still didn't open. She was about to try a full override when the lights went off. The room became bathed only in the light of the computer monitors, which had their own backup generators. The soft rumble of the ship died under her feet.

They were adrift.

"EDI, what's going on?" She asked. There was no answer, and she relaxed. EDI must had decided to transfer herself into the new body. She went back to her terminals to wait, when her omni tool beeped.

She answered it, surprised to see Shepard on the other end. "I don't bite," she said in way of greeting.

"I beg to differ. Are you okay?"

"Yes. I am sorry for the way I acted, I should not have stormed off like that. Can you forgive me?"

Shepard looked confused for a moment, but nodded. "Yeah, but I mean, are you okay now?"

"Of course, Shepard. You know, you can just come over here and see for yourself. It's not as if you've ever considered my office off limits before."

"There is something wrong with EDI," Shepard answered, "The ship's dead in the water. No power. Joker is freaking. I just wanted to make sure you were somewhere safe."

"This happened last time. I'm sorry I didn't warn you. It'll take a little while, but she'll be back on line fairly quickly."

"I don't think so. Just before she went offline EDI said something about a virus. Traynor and Adams are looking into it now. I just wish Tali was here."

Liara stared, shocked, at the small image of Shepard on her wrist. There hadn't been a virus before, but then Eva had been taken directly from the battle on Mars. She probably hadn't had time to activate it. Liara's stomach clenched. What had she done?

"The electronics on my door aren't working. I'm going to pry it open. Where are you?"

"The med bay. But don't. Stay there. I'm sure they'll figure it out."

"Shepard...EDI...if something were to happen...do we know if the ship will run without her?"

"Adam's is sure he can get it working, but I'd rather not have to. Just stay put, even the emergency lights are out."

Liara never really thought of the attack on the first Normandy very often anymore. Three hundred years of other memories, some better, some worse, had pushed all but the barest of emotions about it away from her. But it came back now. The fire on either side of her as she raced toward Shepard. The heat radiating through the armor she wore. The way her helmet had crammed her crest unpleasantly against the back of her head. The sound of the tiny fan in it designed to keep her cool. Shepard, attaching her own helmet, the helmet she would die in. Her chest contracted painfully, and she took a shuddering breath.

No. Never again.

"I'll be there in a couple minutes," she said, and ended the call.

It was easy enough to pry the door open once she'd found the emergency release on the floor. Shepard hadn't been kidding about the lack of light, but the glow of her monitors washed out into the mess and her eyes adjusted quickly to the dim light. She made her way slowly, careful to avoid the table and chairs in her way. She knocked on the med bay door, and head Shepard swear.

The door was pulled open, Garrus and Adams holding it open, and then shutting it behind her.

"I told you to stay put," Shepard growled.

"I was not about to sit there, alone, not knowing what was going on Shepard. Not knowing if you were okay. Where's the body?"

"In the core. EDI told us to get out a couple minutes ago and locked the door behind us. We haven't been able to get it open. It's like she's holding it shut," Adams said. "Everything was going smoothly. Traynor had extracted the original AI fairly easily, and we were working on separating the most basic systems from EDI's primary control so if she had to go down to complete the transfer we wouldn't lose systems. Then EDI's screaming, and Joker's on the comm demanding to know what's happening, and then all systems went down. We were just about to try and hard start her again, when she came back long enough to kick us out."

They all had their omni-tool flashlights on, and it gave the room an eerie sort of glow. No one looked hurt, though Traynor was laying on an exam table, and Chakwas was testing the dilation of her eyes. "What happened?"

"She fell when they came out of the core, hit her head on the table," Shepard said, squeezing her hand and drawing her over to the doctor and her patient.

"I'm fine, really. I've always been a bit clumsy," Traynor said, blinking at the bright light of Chakwas' tiny flashlight.

"No apparent concussion, but until I can do a full scan, stay awake anyway," Chakwas turned to Shepard, "I'm going to go look for the rest of the crew, make sure there are no injuries. Don't let her sleep."

"Of course, Doctor. Be careful."

Chakwas smiled, and Garrus and Adams opened the door for her.

"Oh, so she can go hunt the ship for the injured, but I can't cross a room?" Liara asked, peeved.

"Is this the time, Liara? I just wanted to make sure you were safe."

"No, I suppose it isn't. But we need to talk."

Shepard nodded, and walked away.

They sat in silence, waiting.

The lights flickered, died again.

The door to the AI Core opened. The lights came on.

Liara heard Traynor gasp.

She smiled. Things were going to be okay.


	14. Chapter 14

Liara's smile broadened as EDI stepped into the med bay. It would take some getting used to, seeing EDI with skin, but she was still, very clearly, EDI. The AI seemed a little uncomfortable in the body though. Her movements were jerky and uncoordinated, not anything like the person that had fought along side Liara and Shepard so many times. She was like an infant; trying to process too many signals at once, limbs trying to move in multiple directions. Her head twitched slightly, and the entire body slumped forward, almost collapsing before she caught herself and stood up again.

"Shepard. I am unable to completely eliminate the virus contained in this body. It appears to be built specifically to counter my cyber warfare suite. I have contained it and prevented it from spreading to the rest of the ship, however, the process has left me...stranded. It will take some time before I am able clean the processes in this body. In the meantime, I have removed myself from control of all systems on the ship. The Normandy is space worthy again."

"EDI?" Shepard whispered when she'd stopped speaking.

"Yes, Shepard?"

"That's...you're in...that?"

"For the moment over 90% of my processing power is contained within this unit. It was the only way to prevent the spread of the virus. When it has been purged, I will be able to return to the ship."

Shepard stared, then glanced back at the rest of the crew. Liara was smiling broadly, Adams and Garrus looked much like Shepard herself felt – shocked. Traynor, Shepard thought, looked like Christmas had come early. She turned back to EDI, who was watching her arm twitch. "Um, right. Well, what do you need?"

"I believe I will be able to handle this on my own. However, if Specialist Traynor and Engineer Adams are willing, their advice will be beneficial."

"Willing? EDI, have you looked in a mirror?" Traynor asked. It broke the tension, and Garrus laughed as he slapped her on the back.

EDI simply looked confused as they all chuckled. "I...I believe I should go talk to Jeff. He seemed very upset when I went offline."

They let her go, she stumbled as she moved, but didn't fall, and once the door had shut behind her Adams said, "Why do I think Joker is going to be impossible to live with after this?"

"Because he will be," Shepard laughed. "All right, back to work everyone. We actually have to do our jobs now, we don't have an AI overlord to do it for us."

* * *

Liara had a feeling she'd been here before, and not so long ago.

She sat in Shepard's room, her room, and waited. She didn't pace this time. She wasn't nervous, or worried. There was no need for that. She just needed Shepard to understand that this time she wasn't going to die. That this time, Liara planned on saving her.

It had come to her the night before - after Shepard had said they were going to go find Tali to help EDI - that she didn't care about the galaxy. She didn't care about the Reapers. She didn't care about any of it anymore. If it came down to it, if she had to choose between Shepard and everyone else, she'd choose Shepard. She'd chosen the galaxy once. She'd watched Shepard run away, toward the beam to the Citadel, and she'd held Tali's hand and she'd let herself be driven away and the sharp lines of Shepard's back as she moved away from her was the last thing she'd ever seen of her lover.

But not this time. This time, she was going to be selfish. She just hoped it wouldn't come to that.

The door slid open and she jumped from her seat on the bed. Shepard was reading a data pad, her free hand massaging the back of her neck. She didn't see Liara standing at the bottom of the stairs, and threw herself down into the desk chair. The data pad still held in front of her, she started to take off her shoes, pausing only when she heard Liara clear her throat.

"Hey, you," Shepard said with a smile, before turning back to the information in her hand.

"Shepard?" Liara tried again, climbing into the office.

"Just a minute, Liara. I never realized how much EDI actually_ does_ on this ship. Between making sure all the filters are clean, and the temperature is regulated. Do you have any idea how much heat the generators in your office put out? Keeping your office cool means lowering the temperature on the rest of the ship to almost uncomfortable levels. I don't know how EDI did it." Shepard leaned back, her shoes in a pile under the chair.

Liara pressed the tips of her fingers to her forehead, applying the slightest of pressures. She felt the beginning of a headache coming on and considered just letting it go. Shepard was attentive, loving. Planning for the future could wait. She could just let Shepard be. But if she didn't say something now, she'd never say anything. The thought that maybe, when this was all over, that if she didn't push now, that Shepard would just keep on as she was, wasn't acceptable. They had a future. No, not nine hundred years, but she wasn't asking for that. She'd never asked for that. She took a deep, shuddering breath, and let it out slowly.

"Shepard," she said, more firmly.

Shepard sighed, "Fine." She put the data pad down and patted her knee, and Liara was tempted to take her up on the offer. "You wanted to talk, I'm sorry."

Liara closed her eyes, and sat on the edge of the desk. She'd had a speech planned out earlier, and it had been a very good one, in her mind, but all the words now seemed trite, or worse. She met Shepard's eyes, so much like Illira's, and nodded.

"Do you love me?" she asked.

Shepard started to laugh, but the look on Liara's face didn't leave any doubt that she was completely serious. "Of course I do. You know I do." She reached out for Liara's hands, tried to pull her into her lap. Liara pulled her hands away, scooting further up on the desk.

"Then why do you keep pushing me away?" She stared at her hands. They were callused, worn for years at dig sites, from holding a gun. Three hundred years behind a desk had softened them, and added scars that weren't there now. She rubbed her thumb against the palm of her right hand, where she'd sliced the life line trying to rescue Illira's tenth birthday present from a rain gutter. The kitten had escaped and her young daughter had sat at the window weeping while she'd climbed up the ladder to bring the tiny ball of fur down. The scar was gone now, it had never existed.

"What? Liara, I'm not. Why would you think that?" Shepard stood up and stepped between her knees. She leaned her head against her forehead and ran her hands along her arms. "I love you, Liara. Sometimes so much that it hurts."

"You do, Shepard," Liara sighed, worming out of Shepard's embrace and stood, staring at the empty fish tank. "You used to...you promised me. Goddess, Shepard, I don't know what to think anymore. You say you love me, but I try and have a serious conversation about what's going happen with us when this is all over, and you deflect with a joke. I...I can't...you lock part of yourself away from me when we make love, and at first...I just thought it was...I thought, I don't know what I thought, Shepard! Let me see all of you. If there's something wrong..."

"There's nothing wrong, Liara," Shepard whispered, rubbing her hands against her thighs nervously.

"There must be! You push me away! Shepard, you _told_ me, if not in so many words, to run into the arms of someone else!"

"I...that wasn't my intention."

"I don't care what your intention was," Liara cried, "but I can't lose you again. I can't." She slid down the wall of the fish tank, shuddering as the tears came. She felt drawn thin, over stretched. She saw Teiron's face when she closed her eyes and she felt sick. She'd wanted to keep control, to be strong and emotionless about this. She'd wanted to present her worries the way her mother had spoken to the various village councils on Thessia.

Shepard moved quickly, kneeling in front of her on the hard mental floor. "Liara. I'm sorry. But, I'm going to die, and I can't stop it. You've lived so long, and I can't even imagine...I just want to make sure you're safe when I'm gone. That you're happy."

Liara lifted her head, her eyes swollen, and tears still falling freely. "And what about now? What about the time we have now?"

"I thought that you were happy. I thought...I've been trying to be everything you want from me."

Liara growled in frustration, wiping away her tears on the back of her arm. "All I want from you, is you. You're not going to die tomorrow. Or next week. We will grow old together, Shepard," she reached out, running her fingers along Shepard's jaw line. "One way or another."

"But-"

"No. No more. Stop it right now. Whatever happens, we have a future. You used to tell me about it, sometimes. I miss that. I think I missed you talking about it more than I missed you sometimes." She smiled, and sniffed, wiping at her tears again.

Shepard sat back on her heels, mouth slightly open as she tried to think of a response. The idea that they had a future together was appealing, she couldn't deny it, but she couldn't make herself hope for it either. How she could have with the galaxy crumbling around them she didn't know either, except that, perhaps, it was simply a hope she had clung to. A way to keep her, or perhaps Liara's, morale up. The idea of settling down, raising a family with Liara, it was always in her head. She dreamed about it, sometimes, but the truth was much colder. And it had a face, one she'd seen, and it was her own. It was bleeding, and broken, and real, and she couldn't turn away from the fact that she was going to die. Even if everything they had planned worked, she was going to die.

"I can't give you what you deserve, Liara. You need someone who can love you forever."

"And you won't?"

"I didn't say that. But what I did...Illira, leaving you with her like that. I can't bare to think of doing it again, and it is a very real possibility. I'm a soldier. I've got today, but I can't promise tomorrow...but I can make sure you're happy."

"Shepard, you are such an idiot," Liara chuckled, leaning forward and hugging her.

"I'm not sure if I should be offended or not," Shepard said, pressing a lingering kiss on the top of Liara's head.

"You want me to be happy?" She felt Shepard nod against her crest. "Then promise me tomorrow. Even if you have to break it. Tell me about the house right on the water, and our six daughters, and-"

"Six?" she choked.

Liara smiled, "Yes, six. That's what you said. And the old phonograph that will play old earth music to them while they sleep, and how you will attempt to teach me to fish, and how I'll eventually teach you to dance."

"We've had this conversation before I take it?" Shepard asked, standing up and pulling Liara with her.

"Not this one, no. But you used to tell me about what you wanted, once the Reapers were gone. You even showed me a holo of the house, once, right on the river."

Shepard smiled, she knew the house. It wasn't something she'd ever actually be able to get, but it had been a dream of hers since she was a teenager and had been sent away from her mother's ship. It had been built right on the banks of Mississippi, she wasn't sure where, with towering spires, and a huge veranda. It was...a house. The sort of house that a girl who has never had one dreams of.

"I'm sorry, Liara. It's a nice house, though, isn't it?"

"It is. And your forgiven. Just, don't do it again. Stop worrying about what might happen, it doesn't suit you."

"I can't help it, but I won't let it bother me so much, okay? I'll always worry about you. But will you do me a favor too?"

"Hmm...what?" She took Shepard's hand, and squeezed it once, letting her go back to finish her work.

"Don't let what happened with Teiron hurt you. She does love you."

Liara stopped, one foot on the stair, and closed her eyes. She knew that, and that is what hurt the most. "It was a long time ago."

"And it's hard to stop loving you, no matter how much time has passed. Just...I want you to know that I wouldn't have been angry, even if I would have been terribly jealous."

Liara could hear the smile on her voice, and it brought one to her own lips. "Then why...yesterday...it felt like you didn't care."

"I cared, but it's not like you ran up and kissed her. I didn't want to make things uncomfortable. I don't know what you two had, but I never got the impression it ended horribly, just badly."

"Not even badly," Liara sighed, "It just ended. I loved her," she admitted.

"I know. And that's why I didn't go all caveman on you. Just...you know, warn me...if you decide to run off with her."

"Shepard!"

She held up her hands, laughing, "Okay, okay. I'm sorry."

"That is exactly what I was talking about. You have...no sense...no idea...I wish you had just grabbed me away from her!"

Shepard winced. "I'll keep that in mind, for the next time we see her. I was under the impression that most people don't like that."

"I am not most people. And there won't be a next time. I know where she is now, I can track her. And stay away from her."

Shepard wanted to tell her not to, that it wasn't fair to her. She didn't know all the details but she knew enough about people to know having a friend not tied up in what they were going wouldn't be a bad thing. She also knew Liara well enough to know when to leave things alone. And this was one of those times. "If that's what you want."

"I do. I have work to do. I'll stop by the bridge, and see if EDI has any ideas on how to help with my generators. I'll send her up if she does?"

Shepard nodded. "And Liara?"

"Yes, Shepard?"

"I love you."

"I love you, too."

* * *

Traynor raised her hand to knock on Shepard's door, then lowered it again for the third time. Without EDI to tell her whether or not Shepard was busy, it had been a choice between contacting her over the comm or coming up here herself. She'd decided getting away from the various comm feeds wouldn't be a bad thing, and hadn't considered that Shepard might not be in a position to be interrupted until she was standing in front of her door.

It had been three days since they'd left Cronos, and they were drifting more or less aimlessly while trying to get in contact with the Mirgrant Fleet. While Adams seemed excited to find this Tali'Zorah, Traynor was certain that she and chief engineer were more than qualified to help EDI with her current problems. But, Shepard had insisted. And Shepard was a spectre. Liara had sent her some information on where Tali's ship might be earlier that morning, and, as all Dr. T'Soni's information turned out to be, it had been accurate. Out of date, but accurate. It had been enough to track the ships, though, and they were on their way to meet up with them.

That wasn't why she'd come up here though. She'd thought she might have had a breakthrough with EDI, and Adams and EDI had concurred, but because it would require taking the entire ship offline for an unknown amount of time, they would have to dock first. And to do that, she needed to talk to Shepard.

Who was off duty for what seemed like the first time in three days. She cursed her luck for not figuring it out just a few hours earlier, and raised her hand again. And let it drop. Again.

Shepard had been on edge, snapping more easily. Even Dr. T'Soni seemed unable to calm her down. Everyone knew why she was upset – the council still was waffling about what to do about Udina's death, and the Alliance was dragging their feet about nominating a new councilor. Still, a few hours ago Liara had come down to speak with Joker about something she'd discovered, and on her way back, Shepard had followed her into the elevator.

And it didn't take much to figure out why.

Cursing herself she spun on a heel to leave. She'd go back to her station, and contact Shepard on the comm. It's what she should have done in the first place. The elevator door opened before she reached it, however, and Liara stepped out, two mugs clutched in one hand and a tray with two plates of whatever it was they were serving for lunch balanced on the other.

"Traynor," she said calmly, her eyes darting to the closed door of her rooms. "Everything okay?"

"What? Oh, um, yes. I was going to...I was just leaving."

Liara smiled, "Is she still being unhelpful? I warned her, but she does not listen."

"No. I mean, I don't know. I didn't...I thought...I didn't want to disturb her."

"Well, in that case, I will. I assume you have a reason for being up here, beyond not wanting to disturb Shepard, of course."

Traynor bit her bottom lip, shuffling her feet. Liara always made her feel small. She didn't think it was intentional. The first time she'd met the asari, she'd been right outside the Normandy retrofit, and had been extremely polite. They hadn't spoken long that day, but even then after Liara had left, she'd been left with a feeling of inadequacy. Lieutenant Commander Williams had laughed at her, and told her that was just her asari mind tricks, which hadn't made her feel any better at all.

"I may have a way to quarantine the virus and allow EDI to return to the core without purging her memeory banks. But, everything will have to be shut down for a few hours. Including life support...so..."

"So it'd be best if we were in a nice, safe place with an atmosphere?" Liara asked as she opened the door.

"Exactly."

Traynor saw Shepard stand up from the sofa in the lower part of the room, and felt a wave of guilt as the spectre's smile fell when she saw her. She was still in her uniform, and she did look calmer than she had in days.

"Afternoon, Traynor."

"I have lunch Shepard, and Traynor has some good news."

Traynor watched, still standing in the door frame, as Liara skipped down the couple of stairs into the bedroom and sat the plates and mugs onto the table there. It was a side of her that few on the ship got to see. It was strange to see Liara so calm, so happy. Most of the crew called her dark, brooding, and her personality most of the time did little to discourage it. She was almost bubbly, now, as she stared Shepard down and made her eat. Traynor joined them, walking slowly, feeling out of place, an intruder in their world.

"Well, Traynor, what is this amazing news you have?"

"I think I can fix EDI."

"But?"

"But, it will require us to dock for a few hours. We'll transfer EDI back to the core, let the virus infect the Normandy. Then we purge the body EDI is in, transfer her back, and do the same thing with the Normandy. Since EDI, with the exception of her cyber warfare suite is...for lack of a better word, immune, she'll be fine, and it will simply be a matter of re-uploading some of her software. She doesn't believe there will be any lasting damage."

"And you think that will work?"

"It should. It's not a guarantee, but it's the best idea we've had so far. The matrix inside that unit wasn't designed to hold the same capacity as the Normandy's core, and if we wait too long there might be irreparable damage."

"Like what?" Liara asked. Her tone surprised Traynor. Not so much the concern that dripped from it but more the hint of guilt. Yes, Liara had been with Shepard and Garrus when they'd found the body, and supposedly she'd been the one to suggest bringing it back, but it wasn't like she'd infected EDI with the virus.

"Possible degeneration of her higher functions. Her matrix works much the same way as the human brain and being in that body is preventing the matrix from reacting the way it should. If we wait too long, she might not be able to work all the ship's processes. It could also prevent, as she put it, her ability to learn."

"Shepard, we have to. We're not far from Illium. I still have some pull, just a day."

Shepard poked at the food on her plate. She was nodding slightly, but when she looked up and met Traynor's eyes they were apologetic. "Look, I'd love to. But I think we need to talk tot Tali first. We're only a few hours away from the fleet, that shouldn't be an issue, right?"

"I...I suppose not."

"But if EDI is damaged..."

"I know, Liara. But I don't want to risk the ship if I don't have to. If we can flush the virus without it getting near the ship's systems that would be best. I don't want anything to happen to EDI, but I have to think of the crew and the ship."

"EDI is part of your crew!"

"No, she's right Dr. T'Soni. It's a long shot at best. And EDI will be fine while we get miss...uh..Zorah."

"But-"

Shepard put a hand on Liara's knee and she sighed.

"I...I'm still on duty, so, I'll uh, I'll see you later."

"Of course Specialist. And thank you, at least we have a hope if nothing else come up."

Traynor nodded, bit her lip and almost sprinted out of the room. As soon as the door had closed behind her Liara spun on Shepard, her eyes flashing angrily.

"Why, Shepard? This is my fault and if she can fix it, why don't you let her? Tali is amazing, don't get me wrong, but EDI and the geth are not the same. We'd have better luck with Legion!"

"You know? Of course you know Legion. I trust Tali. And the quarians have more experience with AIs than anyone else. It's not that I don't trust Traynor...I just don't like handing over the future of my ship to maybes."

"You can't let her die!"

"Jesus, Liara, I'm not! We're taking a few hours to pick Tali up, on information you provided, by the way. And then we'll head to the nearest space dock, alright? This isn't your fault."

"I shouldn't have take the Normandy. I should have stayed on Mars," she sighed.

"Says the woman that yesterday was yelling at me about my worrying about the future," Shepard muttered.

"That's different. This is my fault!"

"And if it hadn't happened, if you'd stayed on Mars, then nothing would be happening. Everything would be playing out as it was, and I'd be walking down a path that leads to my death. So, let it go."

Liara was about to snap back at her when there was knock on the door. "Come in!" she shouted instead, and then glared at Shepard when she grinned at her.

EDI walked in, still a little jerky in her movements, but much smoother than she'd been days before. She'd found an Alliance uniform among the extras floating around on the ship, and had changed out of the Cerberus one she'd been wearing when she was brought on board. Someone had brushed out her hair, and washed off the heavy makeup Eva had been wearing. She came down to them, and stood at ease a few feet from them.

"EDI, I'm sorry," Liara whispered.

"Have you done something wrong Dr. T'Soni? I am unaware of anything you need to apologize for."

"For...because we haven't been able to find a way to fix you."

"I did not expect it to be easy. I came to speak with you, in fact."

Shepard stood. "I do have something to apologize for. Traynor explained what they wanted to do. I hope you can understand why I'm putting it off. Tali-"

"Tali should be a great asset to your team, Shepard. And I do hope she will be able to help. I agree that keeping the ship fit is your main concern. You made the proper decision."

Liara sniffed and rolled her eyes, but kept her mouth shut. It wasn't right. They had a way, they should at least try it before something happened to EDI that couldn't be fixed. She didn't like the way that EDI seemed to be unable to control her movement. She was blinking too frequently, especially considering she didn't need to blink, and her fingers were twitching randomly and she didn't seem to notice it. She felt so guilty. EDI was supposed to slip into the body easily, control it without problem, and clearly she wasn't able to. If there was a way to make her better, they should use it, but Shepard was blocking it. And it was more than a little upsetting.

"Thank you, EDI. I'll let you two talk." Shepard stood, brushed her knuckles against the back of Liara's hand and moved up into her office. It wasn't really privacy, but it was apparently good enough for EDI, because she took a seat across from Liara on the sofa.

"What did you want to talk about EDI? Do you want to go to my office?" Liara asked, looking up at Shepard, who was shuffling through a stack of data pads on her desk.

"This will be fine. My question involves my use of this body during the Reaper War when you lived through it. I am aware that Shepard has asked that no one mention that, but I had hoped you'd be willing to answer my questions anyway."

"Of course. If I can answer it, I will."

"Thank you, Dr. T'Soni. Did I acquire this body in your time line?"

Liara nodded, "Yes. Dr. Core was working at the archives. She...attacked. You lacked the epidermis, and I admit, it is a bit disconcerting to see you with it now."

"Did I have the same difficulties with the fine motor control?"

She lowered her eyes. She thought of the way EDI had fought along side them, as easy in her body as if she'd always had it, and of the fumbling way she moved around now. She shook her head, guilt rising in her throat. "No. It wasn't seamless, getting you into that body, but once you were there..."

"Thank you. I am encouraged that when this virus is removed that I will have better control of this unit. Already the crew is reacting differently to it."

"You became part of the crew, EDI. A lot of the time we forgot that we could contact you from anywhere. Gabby would try to run up to talk to you on the bridge."

"Was I unable to communicate through the Normandy's comm systems?"

Liara smiled, "No, you could. It was just that with the body, people started treating you...like a person. A lot of people forgot you were still part of the ship."

"That is highly inefficient, though currently that is the only way to communicate with me. I do not understand why they would do so if it was not necessary."

"Because that is what they would do to any other member of the crew, EDI."

"So, they treated me as human?"

"I suppose so."

"Thank you Dr. T'Soni. That was very helpful. I have a personal question as well, if I may?"

Liara saw Shepard lift her head and glance at them. She remembered EDI's personal questions, though unlike Shepard she had nipped EDI's curiosity in the bud in regards to 'asari mating practices'. The last thing she needed was Joker to know anymore about what she did with Shepard. Not they had done much, then. Having any alone time with her bondmate had been nearly impossible, even after they'd been married. Still, EDI wasn't known for keeping her mouth shut.

"Of course, EDI," she said, hoping she wouldn't regret it.

"I am currently, in human terms, ill. The virus that infects this body is having unintended consequences to some of my processes, though currently nothing permanent. I am finding that Jeff, specifically, has been treating me very differently, even in regards to having this body. I had believed that he would be...attracted...to this form. He has shown in the past a desire for classically beautiful women, and I expected him to react favorably. Instead, he has been treating me...much as he did before my shackles were removed." She paused, and Liara thought she looked expectant. The silence stretched.

"There wasn't a question in that, EDI," Shepard said from above them. Liara jumped, she'd forgotten Shepard was there.

"Yes, of course, Shepard. You are also ill, Dr. T'Soni. Have you found that when others know of your illness that they treat you differently?"

Liara stood up suddenly, gaping at the AI. It wasn't so much that EDI knew she was ill, she had eyes everywhere, so much that she thought that there was any comparison. Her own illness was something she'd simply learned to live with. She didn't feel any different, it did not effect her day to day life, and when Shepard didn't bring it up she could go days without thinking about it. Had gone years without it crossing her mind. She'd never felt alone on Earth, she'd had Illira until just the last century, and her work. It had kept her busy, and the fact that her bed was empty had never bothered her, never concerned her. It just was. It was why Shepard's insistence on trying to find a cure was so frustrating. She had been fine without it.

"I don't...I am unsure as to what you are talking about." Lying to her wasn't difficult, even though she knew that EDI would know she was lying.

"I am sorry for prying, Dr T'Soni. I just hoped for some insight into how I can expect people to treat me. You say that the crew accepted me, before, however as this virus has caused a disruption in the normal running of the ship, I do not think they will be as tolerant."

"I really am sorry, EDI."

"Of course Dr. T'Soni." She stood, her legs almost collapsing beneath her before she caught herself. She stumbled up the stairs, tripping at the door.

Liara sighed as she watched her go, it wasn't fair, nor right. She shouldn't have lied, but it was bad enough having Shepard taking too much time trying to find something that didn't exist. She didn't want EDI doing the same.


	15. Chapter 15

**Please refer to summary warning before yelling at me about my lack of time travel knowledge. No science I tell you! None! Zip, zero, zilch, nada. *nods***

**Additional, to the anon reviewer: Shep and Liara were married in the previous timeline after Rannoch but before Thessia. They are not currently married anywhere but Liara's head (and mine :))**

* * *

Tali heard the environmental seal on her door hiss and she pulled the mask away from her face. With a groan she pushed her hood down and attempted to untangle her hair with still-gloved fingers. As much as she loved being aboard the Normandy, being back with the fleet had its advantages, and the fact that the sleeping quarters were clean rooms was one of the largest. She rolled her head on her shoulders, her neck making tiny popping sounds; the tension draining from her shoulders. The room was tiny, barely large enough for the small cot-like bed and space for her to turn around, but it let her get out of her suit. She changed quickly, putting the suit into the decontamination unit in the wall and dressing in loose fitting pants and shirt. They had probably belonged to the previous occupant of this room, but if the quarians were good at one thing it was disinfecting things. She'd had the clothes for weeks now and hadn't had any reaction, so they'd been cleaned well.

She grabbed a pair of sterilized gloves from the shelf on the wall, and after slipping them on rummaged around under the bed for the book she'd stuck there. Kasumi had given it to her just after they'd parted ways from the Normandy. The fragile paper of the ancient book prevented it from going through the rigorous cleaning most things entering the clean rooms required, but a less invasive cleaning, and the regularly cleaned gloves, allowed her to read it without anything that may have accumulated on it over the years making her ill. She'd read it twice since she'd rejoined the crew of the Rayya, and was a good way into her third. She didn't entirely understand everything about the story, like why Miss Elizabeth didn't just punch George Wickham between the legs when she discovered what he was truly like. It would have solved so many problems her family had later on. Although, then, she supposed, there wouldn't have been quite the same happy ending.

All the same, she liked the Bennett girls, and the story, and was more than pleased that Kasumi had given her the book from her collection.

Miss Bennett had just fallen ill, and Elizabeth had made quite an impression on Bingley, his sisters, and most importantly Darcy when she was interrupted.

"Tali? The Normandy's just contacted us. They're asking permission to dock and that you meet them."

"The Normandy?" she asked herself, and then, to the disembodied voice, "Did they say why?"

"No, ma'am. They just said that the Spectre Shepard would like to speak with you."

"Shepard!" Tali grinned. That changed things, of course. She'd heard rumors that Shepard was no longer incarcerated, but she hadn't let herself believe it. "If Captain Kar'Danna is agreeable, please allow them to dock. I will be up there momentarily. Otherwise, please have a shuttle ready for me."

"Of course, Tali'Zorah."

It was a matter of minutes to extract her suit from it's enclosure and put it on. She triple checked her seals, which took longer, and rushed toward the docking bays. She ignored the calls of her friends, and the frustrated mutters of those she pushed out of her way, and literally jumped over the railing of a set of stairs to get there faster. Perhaps it was childish to want to be there before Shepard disembarked the Normandy, but she didn't care. When it came to Shepard, a little childishness was acceptable, if anything, she thought it was probably expected.

She slid to a halt beside Kar'Danna, panting heavily. He glanced at her, and from the tilt of his head she knew he was silently laughing at her. She smiled back, though he couldn't see it, and shrugged. It may have only been a little under four months, but it felt like years since she'd seen the Commander.

"Thank you, for allowing them to board," she said, bouncing impatiently. She almost laughed, thinking of the way she had done much the same thing the first time Adams had shown her how the Normandy's engines worked. How far she had come from that scared girl on the Citadel.

"It is always a pleasure to see Commander Shepard. And it doesn't hurt that she let you come back."

Tali was prevented from answering by the decontamination team. She peered around the captain's shoulder, watching as the Normandy slid silently beside the ship. Some of her patience returned as she waited for the team to give the all clear for the boarding party to leave the Normandy, and she was much more composed when Shepard stepped out of the docking tube.

"Captain Shepard," Kar'Danna said brightly, offering his hand, "it's a pleasure to have you on board again. And hopefully under better circumstances?"

"I suppose tha-"

Whatever Shepard had been saying was lost on Tali, however, when she was tackled.

One moment she was standing beside her captains, listening to them exchange the foolish pleasantries that ship captains did, and the next she had almost landed on the floor. Conversation stopped around them as they all watched. Liara appeared to be attempted to squeeze the life out of her, the bear hug she'd wrapped the quarian in almost lifting Tali off the ground.

"I've missed you!" Liara breathed excitedly. She was wearing what looked like one of Shepard's spare helmets, and it fit awkwardly over her pressure armor. The look was incredibly comical. Tali remembered the conversations she'd had with Liara on the original Normandy about how uncomfortable human helmets were on her crest, and how she wished she'd been able to rescue her breathing mask from Therum. Apparently, asari used their barriers and heavy webbing to protect their heads in high or zero pressure atmospheres, not helmets. However, for health reasons, Tali knew that that she wouldn't have been allowed on board if she had any skin showing.

Tali laughed, hugging her friend back, "I missed you too, but if you ever responded to any of my messages it wouldn't have been four months since we've seen each other!"

Liara chuckled nervously, which Tali found incredibly odd. "I am sorry. It's been...hectic."

"So I gather," Tali said, nodding at Shepard. The last time she'd heard from her human captain she'd just dropped her off at the Citadel on her way to meet up with Liara before turning herself into the Alliance. A stupid move, Tali had thought at the time, but it apparently hadn't turned out too bad.

"We need your help, Tali," Shepard said, coming over and laying a hand on Liara's shoulder. The asari leaned into it, and Tali had to contain herself from squealing at them in delight. It was one thing to know that her captain and her best friend were linking suits, but it was another thing, and a terribly adorable one, to see them so at ease with each other.

"I'm always happy to help, Shepard. What can I do for you?" She motioned down the hall, and led Shepard and Liara through the winding corridors of the Rayya. Once they were away, as much as possible on a quarian ship, from the crowds, Tali asked, "What did you need my help with?"

"EDI's run into a little trouble," Shepard said, keeping her voice low.

"Oh? I'm not sure what help I can be with that. I never even got her sense of humor," she said. She paused, running her hand along her hood. "Is it strange that I don't find it strange that an AI has a sense of humor?" she asked, mostly to herself.

"Will you at least come take a look? We may have, um, accidentally, infected her with a virus."

Tali motioned to a bench built into the wall and sat down, Shepard and Liara to either side of her. She leaned back. "What does the virus do?" Liara and Shepard shared a look, not that either could see the others face, and Tali couldn't help but laugh. "You have no idea, do you?"

"Not really," Shepard admitted.

"I'm really not going to be much help, but I'll see what I can do."

"Tali?" Liara asked, after Shepard had thanked her and moved off.

"Hmm?"

"What ever you do, don't let them attack the geth," Liara whispered.

Tali laughed, "Of course you know about that, Shadow Broker. Not sure what I can do about it though. I just work the engines, and Admiral Daro'Xen occasionally asks me for help."

"But...what's the date?"

Tali laughed, and gave it. Liara bowed her head and chuckled to herself. "I need to have a calendar tattooed to the back of my eyes," she muttered.

"Something I should know about?"

"No. Come on, EDI's waiting."

* * *

Tali slipped into the chair beside Liara in the mess and sighed.

"Keelah, they're like children just about to leave on pilgrimage in there. I could barely get away."

Liara smiled. She'd left after only minutes for that very reason. Between Admiral Xen, Traynor and Shepard it had reminded her of one of Illira's birthday parties. Tali in the background attempting to keep them focused had simply reinforced the memory. They had been hovering around the AI core, throwing ideas back and forth, talking on top of each other. Liara left when EDI had brought her body in. That had been a little over three hours ago.

"You seemed to be enjoying yourself when I left. I would have thought you had everything fixed by now."

"Rub it in. Go ahead. Adams has a much better grasp of EDI's processes, I was just under foot."

"Do not sell yourself short, Tali. I would think that if you could get them to be quiet for three minutes together you would already have EDI back to normal."

"They are loud, aren't they? And none of them listen to each other."

"Have they made any progress?"

"Yes. That's why I left. Once they got around to opening everything up, there wouldn't be room to move in there. But tell me, Shepard won't say a word about how you got her out of prison. Spill, Liara."

"There is nothing to say."

"You're staying in her cabin..."

Liara felt the heat rise in her cheeks and she buried her face in the data pad she'd been reading before Tali had left the med bay. "I am not sure what that has to do with anything."

"Nothing," Tali said, dragging the word out. "But if you don't tell me all the details about how you got her out of prison, I will have to start asking if it's true she actually let Jack give her that tattoo."

"I didn't do anything. Shepard is a spectre, she just walked out."

"Uh-huh. I was there when we got Shepard off that rock, and I was there when Hackett showed up on the ship. And I was there when Shepard sat in the lounge for six hours without moving a muscle staring at the population stats of the Bahak system. Now, spill."

"I might possibly have brought the questionable legality of the Alliance holding the Normandy to the attention of Councilor Tevos. And I might have used Lieutenant Williams' strong connection to the Alliance to convince her that helping me was actually keeping Shepard under the Alliance's eyes. Though, I'm not sure she believes that anymore."

"You're right, that was boring. So...Shepard keeping you busy?"

"Honestly, it's been a lot of waiting, followed by brief spats of fearing for her life, followed by more waiting."

"That's not what I meant. Liara, I need to live vicariously through you, and since you're ability to weave a decent escape-from-enemy-clutches tale is lacking, a hot romance will have to do."

This from the woman who had four children with three different men. She suspected it had been her way of dealing with the loss of Garrus, but considering the direction the conversation was going, Liara was tempted to tell her this and that her own sex life, as better as it was now then it had been, or rather would be...or would have been...

She rubbed her temples, wondering if she'd ever get used to thinking about her past in terms of the future, and let Tali's future personal life drop as a topic.

"You will have to ask Shepard."

"Oh! Come on, you know she won't tell me a thing. She says I gossip. I do not gossip," Tali pouted.

"Of course you don't," Liara chuckled.

"It really is amazing the effect you've had on Shepard," Tali said after a few minutes of comfortable silence between the two. A human male and Amerra had walked by and the asari had waved at Liara before giving her a huge smile and pointing at the man behind his back and shooting her a thumbs up. That particular human gesture has spread ridiculously fast across the galaxy.

"What do you mean? She's no different than she's ever been." Liara said, confused.

Tali laughed, "No different since she's met you, you mean."

"I have no idea what you are talking about, Tali. I haven't changed anything about Shepard."

"Right. Sure. Believe what you want, but two years ago Shepard would have flipped at having an Alliance ship piloted by asari and turians. Hell, two years ago, she tried to keep me off the ship."

"She what? That is not funny, Tali." Sixty years they had been friends, and she'd never mentioned this before. She had to be...what was the human expression Illira had been so fond of? Pulling her leg.

"Ask Ashley. Ask Garrus! Before she pulled you out of that mine she didn't say so much as three words together to us. The only reason she did after is so the rumors about the two of you would stop."

"Shepard isn't like that!" Liara snapped. She knew Shepard. She was nothing like her mother.

Tali shrugged, "She wasn't mean, or rude. Just indifferent. She was nice enough when she did talk to us." At Liara's incredulous look, she shook her head, "Seriously. Before you came on board and stole her heart away, it was Ashley and Kaidan on every ground mission. Period. And then it was Kaidan and you. You never noticed?"

"There was nothing to notice," Liara said slowly, thinking back. It was a long time ago, and she'd spent most of her time then telling herself to get over the hero worship she felt for Shepard and to grow up. In fact, when she had gone with Shepard, with the exception of Noveria, she really had no memory of what happened beyond thinking that she shouldn't be thinking about Shepard. Yet, what she did remember was Wrex and Shepard sharing war stories, sitting with Garrus and Shepard after killing Sovereign and listening to him talk about his sister. They'd all been friends, and Shepard had never shown any preference to her human crew over her alien teammates.

"Of course there was. Shepard fell madly in love with you, and came and talked to the rest of us so that no one would say anything about her sneaking into the room behind the med bay at all hours of the night to see how you were. She was your rescuer, your brave space-knight, and she was completely hooked on you."

"You make it sound like a fairy tale," Liara muttered. Shepard had not fallen in love with her like that. She had come by to ask her how she was feeling, sure, but she'd been weak then, barely able to control the meld. It was natural for her to be worried about a member of crew. And she'd spent just as much time in engineering with Tali, or in the cargo hold with Garrus and Wrex. Of course, Shepard had felt something for her then, but that hadn't been why she was coming to visit her.

"A fairy...tale?"

"Human morality tales," Liara answered automatically, her mind going to the story her father had told her. But her life wasn't a story told to teach children to behave themselves or their evil step mother would get them, or a way to explain away something that her primitive ancestors hadn't been able to find a reason for. It was real.

"I'm fairly certain that nothing you and Shepard do could be considered moral." Tali said, her voice strained as she kept herself from laughing.

Liara turned and glared at her friend, and then burst out laughing. That was all Tali needed to join her, and in seconds they were both doubled over laughing hysterically. Nothing that had been said had been terribly funny, but it didn't really matter.

"Goddess, Tali," Liara gasped, tears streaming down her cheeks, "I...I can't breathe."

Which set off another wave of giggling from both of them.

"Do I want to know what's so funny?" Ashley asked, coming around the corner.

"Nothing," Liara hiccuped, trying to regain some control.

"We were just discussing Liara's effect on Shepard. She didn't believe me that she was even more standoffish than you before she came along."

"Hey! I wasn't standoffish. I just didn't like you," Ashley said, looking perfectly serious for about half a second, "but I'm sorry for forcing her company on you. No one should have that done to them."

"I knew it was you!" Tali laughed.

"I am lost," Liara sighed, then hiccuped again. She got up to get a glass of water, still listening as Ashley explained.

"It was fairly obvious that Shepard was seriously crushing on you, Liara. She smiled like an idiot whenever you were in the room, had trouble forming coherent sentences if she talking about you, normal stuff. I didn't think about it when I teased her about it, but I told her that with all the time she spent with you everyone else was going to start getting jealous. The next day, she's actually talking to Garrus. I swear he shit a brick when he realized she was talking to him about something other than repairs to the Mako. Wish I'd taken vid of it, honestly."

"I don't understand. Garrus is Shepard's best friend. I've been told that he is going to be godfather of our daughters, if we ever have them." Liara sat back down beside Tali and leaned her forearms on the table.

"They're friends _now_," Tali said, "And Wrex is like the big brother she never had, and apparently I'm her little sister. That doesn't change the fact that if you hadn't wandered in and opened her eyes-"

"And her legs," Ashley added, making Liara blush and hide her head in her hands.

"- we never would have spoken again after the Citadel was safe. She certainly wouldn't have hunted me down to take me on that suicide mission," she said glaring at Ashley. "I hate you."

"I said I was sorry," Ashley laughed.

"You were simply misreading her intentions. I am sure before you came and rescued me things were simply too hectic for her to make the time to get to know you."

"Believe that if you want," Tali said. "But, I'm just going to stick with the fact that you are the reason Shepard and I are friends. That way I can blame you whenever she annoys me."

"If you want more evidence, Liara, just think about Kaidan," Ashley said. She stared over their heads, where, behind the bulkhead the memorial stood. "He was seriously pissed off."

"I never understood why," Tali said, "everyone knew she wasn't interested. Well, not really interested."

"You could only see that because you're a quarian and can read body language better than the rest of us. And live off gossip, so kept your eye on the two of them," Ashley chuckled.

"I do not gossip!"

Liara sighed, "I do not know if I should believe you. If you aren't serious, this is a very poor joke, but I know Shepard. She would not act like that."

Tali shook her head. "Then let it go. She is what she is now, and she loves you and she kept me from being exiled. But, I still need details on what goes on upstairs. ...Does she role play with those models she collects? Call you captain?"

"I do not want to hear this about the Skipper. Nope. Leaving now," Ashley said, though she made no move to get up.

"I have no intention of saying anything on the matter," Liara said, smiling at how disappointed Ashley actually looked. "Sometimes I think she and I are the only ones who have sex in this entire galaxy the way people ask us about it," she muttered.

"No, just the only two on this ship," Ashley joked. "And considering the way she dotes on you, can you expect any less from us?"

Liara didn't answer, just glared at the human woman. Ashley smirked, which started Tali giggling again, and it was a matter of moments until all three of them were laughing. When they'd all caught their breath, Ashley leaned back in her chair and crossed her arms.

"So, is Tali allowed in on your little secret?"

Liara rolled her eyes. Of course. She should have expected this. She was surprised more of the crew hadn't been asking her for the galactic lottery numbers (thus far, only Garrus had, and she was fairly certain he'd been joking), and had hoped that it would simply be forgotten, like the time she'd walked face first into the side of the elevator on the original Normandy while daydreaming. It was the last time she'd let her mind wander to thoughts of Shepard when she wasn't behind closed doors, or attempting to kill something.

"You have a secret?" Tali asked, turning her entire body in the chair to face Liara. "Why have I not heard of this before?"

"It would not be much of a secret if you had," Liara answered, staring pointedly at Ashley.

She hadn't had any plans on telling Tali. The rest of the crew was one thing, she had no idea of what their future held beyond the final battle on Earth. Tali was different. Tali had been beside her for decades. They'd cared for each others children. Liara had been there when Tali's granddaughter had been born. She'd been there when time had finally caught up to the quarian and she had joined her ancestors. Her eldest son had been the driving force behind the quarians leaving the Sol system to try and make it to Rannoch, and he had only waited as long as he had to push for the evacuation because of his mother. She wasn't sure if, with Tali aware that she'd been to the future, that she could keep what she knew from Tali. None of it would happen now, hopefully, but all the same that was exactly the sort of thing Illira had been warning her about, she was certain of it.

Tali was her oldest and dearest friend, and the last thing she wanted was to upset her, but the thought of telling her terrified her. Still, it would be nice to turn the tables on her and leave her a blushing mess of embarrassment. Not that anyone would know she was blushing with her mask. She had done some awful things in her life, she had ordered people killed, she'd maneuvered people like pieces on a game board, but she had never sunk so low as to use the information she had on her friends against them, and she wasn't about to start.

"Well?" Tali asked. "Tell me!"

"Shepard has placed a ship wide ban on anyone mentioning anything about it. I'd hate to see what your toothbrush would like if you had to use it to clean the head, Williams" Liara grinned.

Ashley pouted. "Come on, Liara. Everyone else knows. It would be completely unfair."

"Yes," Tali agreed quickly, "unfair."

"Fine," Liara sighed, "not that she'll believe a word of it."

She'd never actually had to explain what happened to anyone before. Shepard had taken the memories from her, and then between Shepard and Vega the story had spread without her ever having to vocalize it. Trying to find the words now to explain it was difficult, but once she started it was like she couldn't stop. As she spoke, a tension she hadn't known was there seemed to lift from her. She didn't stop with the basics, like she had planned, but told Tali and Ashley everything. Her fear that Tali would be upset were unfounded, and both women hung on her every word.

For the first time, she admitted out loud that she didn't know what happened to the Normandy or the crew that had been aboard it. She explained how she'd discovered she was pregnant, and how she'd wept on Tali's shoulder the day it had been confirmed. She told them of how Hannah Shepard had blocked Shepard's survivors benefits from her, and how there had been nothing she could do about it because they had eloped on the Citadel just weeks before it had been taken by the Reapers, and any documentation of their marriage would have been lost with it. This revelation was accompanied by Ashley muttering "I knew she was a bitch. Shepard must be like her dad." She told them of her isolation after Tali had passed, of being shunned by her own people, and not completely accepted by the humans she worked for. She told them of Illira, and how the young asari had taught Tali to ride a horse, and how Tali, in tur,n had taught Illira to sing. And then she told them about the last night she had seen her daughter.

"Every year Earth passed through the war zone. It just became tradition for me to see her then, even though we weren't really talking. When she asked me to stay...I thought maybe we were working on getting back on the same page. There was a box on a table, and she dropped something inside it. It was like a chemical reaction, it just lit up. And the next thing I knew, I was running from Hagalaz."

The other two were silent for a long time after she stopped speaking. She waited for Tali to start laughing, but it didn't happen. Tali was just staring at her, and Liara had the impression that she was gaping under her mask. Suddenly, though, she reached out and grabbed the forgotten data pad Liara had been reading earlier. She fiddled with it for a moment, then handed the pad back to Liara.

"Did it look like this?" she asked.

On the screen on the data pad was a picture of a wooden box. It was carved with a series of pictographs. Liara recognized them from a class she'd had during her undergraduate studies, but they'd barely been touched on as possibly an early Prothean language. She'd later figured out that they hadn't been Prothean, and had predated them significantly, but by that point she was months away from her doctorate, and it hadn't seemed important.

"It was dark," she said, "but, I mean, it was a box. It was carved. This looks like what Illira described, I suppose."

"And your daughter...Illira? She got it to work? That's amazing," Tali breathed.

"What do you know about it?" Ashley asked.

"About forty years ago someone brought this back to the fleet as their pilgrimage gift. It was sitting on one of the ships in the heavy fleet since then. I saw it once, when I went with Raan when I was very young. To think, that it was a time machine."

It was Liara's turn to stare, stunned at Tali. "You believe me?"

"Of course I believe you. The reality of time travel has always been there. Humans were toying with it almost two hundred years ago. Many of my people think that had the geth not revolted, we would have discovered a way to move freely through the fourth dimension. It's really just a mathematical problem, of finding a way to get our mass to shift outside it's constraints."

"I...what?" She knew Shepard would probably understand what Tali had said, and Illira certainly would have, but Liara had been lost somewhere after the first sentence.

Tali smiled. And hit a few more buttons on the data pad. A quadrant graph appeared, and with a few more buttons an image of a circle was graphed on it. "This is a two dimensional circle, right? A single point can move around freely on it. That's like you, walking across the Normandy. What Illira did is to," she hit a few more keys, and a third axis appeared, and the circle became a sphere, "get the point, you, to exist in another dimension. You were a point on a line, the box made you a point not on the circle, but in the sphere. A one dimensional thing moving in three dimensional space. In your case, a three dimensional person moving in the fifth dimension, leaving you free to move anywhere you want in the fourth, time. I'm figuring that once it got you to where it was taking you it dropped you back in the normal time stream."

"I'm still not following," Ashley said, and Liara nodded, agreeing with her.

"It doesn't matter," Tali said, shutting down the data pad "The one we had was broken about four years ago. The captains son knocked it off its shelf and it cracked. And you don't want to go back until you stop the Reapers, right?"

"Right," Liara agreed, her shoulders sagging. For a moment she'd thought there would be a chance to see Illira again. To hold her daughter. She'd just have to wait, and hope she got there eventually.

"So, what information do you have to stop them? Structural weakness? Is that what EDI's body is for?" Liara smiled at Tali's enthusiasm. She seemed more excited about this then knowing about her sex life, and Liara was more than fine with that.

Both women listened intently as she told the rest of the story. About sharing the memory with Shepard, and having to get to the tower to do what was needed to the citadel before the crucible was finished. A haggard looking Shepard, followed by an equally tired Traynor and Admiral Xen walked out of the med bay as she finished. They spotted the women, and though Traynor excused herself, Xen and Shepard came and joined them.

"Any news?" Liara asked.

"She'll be fine," Shepard said, grabbing Liara's half finished glass of water and downing it in a single gulp.

"A full system restart is still required, but the virus is gone," Xen said. "She is much more complicated than the geth."

"I did try to tell you that," Tali said.

"You did. I will be sure to listen to you next time. If you'll excuse me, Shepard, Tali'Zorah, I'll be returning to my ship." Xen nodded to them, and turned away. She'd taken about a half dozen steps when Liara jumped up and ran after her.

"Don't do it," she said.

"I'm sorry, ma'am?"

"The war. With the geth. Stop them. A lot of people will die. There is a geth named Legion. Talk to him. You can have peace."

"I don't know what you think you know, young lady," the quarian admiral hissed, "but keep your nose out of things you do not understand."

"The weapon won't work. It will at first, but it won't take long for them to find a way to counter it. If you try, you will die."

Xen stared at her a long time, and though Liara couldn't see them, she felt her eyes boring into her. "I don't know how you know about that, but I'll think on what you've said." She turned on a heel and headed for the elevator.

Liara watched her go, and hoped that with one more voice against attacking the geth, maybe the war wouldn't happen. It would still be months before Xen's prototype was finished enough for them to even consider attacking, but she hoped her seeds of doubt could save everyone a lot of trouble. Once the elevator doors had closed, she turned and returned to the mess. Shepard had stolen her chair, and was laughing at something Tali had said. She couldn't believe that what Tali and Ashley had said was true. It hadn't been her. Things like that only happened in story books, people didn't become completely different from falling in love.

She took the chair beside Ashley, across from Shepard, savoring the smile the spectre gave her and ignoring the pointed 'I told you so," look she got from Ashley. And probably Tali as well.

"So," Tali said, "out of curiosity. Only you and Ashley have been asked to stay away from the Citadel, right?"

Shepard nodded, "Yeah, why?"

"Then why haven't you sent Liara up to the Council Chambers to do the whatever it is? I'm sure the asari councilor could get her in. She knew your mother didn't she?"

"I...yes. She did some work for my mother before I was born, as I understand it."

"There you go."

Liara gave Shepard a penetrating look.

Why hadn't they thought of that themselves?


	16. Chapter 16

**Okay, I hate to do this, no really, I actually do, and you can blame my husband and his 'outdoorsiness'. This is going to be the last update for about two weeks. I'll keep writing, but I'm being drug off to the backwoods of Washington or somesuch and he won't let me bring my hotspot :( I have no idea what I'm going to do, outside, with trees...and bugs...and possibly no running water...and certainly no internet. So, just know, that all hate mail can be directed his way. I will see you all again in about 14 days, if I survive.**

Shepard sighed in boredom, not for the first time that day, or the week for that matter, and slumped down in her chair. She'd never really appreciated what Tali had meant by a quarian ship being loud. She'd known the Normandy was quiet, even in comparison to other Alliance ships, and the SR-2 doubly so even with its larger drive core, but this was insane. The closest thing she could think of to describe it was the summer she'd turned 17, when she and a young man from the school she'd been attending had gone to a local fair. The midway had sounded a bit like this. Only more subdued.

Even with Xen's help it hadn't been as easy as simply shutting down the Normandy and starting it up again. The Migrant fleet had allowed the crew to board one of their recently purchased ships, one that hadn't been properly refitted, while they had finished work on the Normandy. The result was that every member of her crew was trapped on a third rate cargo freighter, because they hadn't been able to get the ship running again.

Joker was beside himself, and Dr. Chakwas had ended up having to sedate him before he'd hurt himself. After a week and a half the rest of the crew weren't in much better spirits. The fleet was slowly towing the Normandy to the nearest space dock, but they didn't move quickly. Shepard hated being frustrated with the slow pace the quarians took as they mined asteroids and picked up salvage, but she really couldn't help it. She knew she should be grateful; they had offered her their best minds to get the Normandy working again, and there was some hope that they'd get it, and EDI, working again before they made it to the dock, but she could only take so much of having nothing to do.

Apparently, a captain with a downed ship was something to be pitied, and mostly looked down on, in the quarian fleet. If she received one more sympathetic aside like she'd just received from a passing young woman, she'd tear her hair out.

It had been looking up too. Other than feeling like a complete fool, and not a little egotistical, for thinking it had to be her that changed the Citadel's programing, there had been a ray of hope that they wouldn't have to wait for the council to get its act together before they could get up to their chambers. It was supposed to have been very simple. Adams and Traynor would shut down the Normandy until it was adrift. Once they had confirmation that all systems, including EDI were down, they'd restart everything starting with the most basic, at which point everyone would go back to work and they'd head back to the Citadel. Instead, once the Normandy was dead in space, no one had been able to restart so much as the refrigerator in the mess.

Liara had even gone so far as to shut down her feeds and lend her generators to try and jump start the ship. It hadn't worked.

And now Shepard felt like little more than a freeloader. She slunk even further down into the chair, her legs spread out under the table and let her head fall back. The view of the ship behind her was now visible, if upside down, and she watched various members of her crew and a few quarians walk on the ceiling. It gave her a small ache in her neck, and her head began to feel heavy as the blood rushed to it, but there was something oddly relaxing about it.

"Didn't your mother ever teach you proper table manners?"

Shepard jumped, banging her knees into the legs of the table. She barked a curse, and glared at Liara who had taken the second chair. The asari smiled at her innocently, folding her hands on the table. Shepard rubbed her knee, feeling the echoing pain down her shins. The table was made of stronger stuff than she'd expected, apparently. She straightened up, and mimicked Liara's collected pose, hands folded on the table.

"She did, actually. It just never stuck."

"That's unfortunate. I have some news, I think. I have found Legion."

Shepard raised an eyebrow and leaned forward. When it was clear that it could be awhile before they made it back the Citadel, Liara had taken it upon herself to speak with the geth. She'd been spending most of her time back on the Normandy, complaining only briefly about having to wear her pressure armor on the now-mostly-derelict ship, trying to get a message into geth controlled space. Shepard hadn't thought it would amount to much – she found it highly unlikely that the geth consensus considered anything coming from this side of the veil as worthy of so much as a first look, let alone a second. But, as she had been finding out frequently of late, she'd been wrong.

"I really don't know why you are so obsessed with finding that geth. You've never even met it."

"I have. We worked along side him. And I think he may be the key to making sure the quarians don't do something stupid. Which they're working on doing, right now."

"I want to hear that story sometime. So, where is it?"

"Back with the consensus, but he's not currently on Rannoch. He said he'd like to meet up with you, and see about writing out a treaty with the quarians. Since you're here."

"Of course it did. Have I told you recently how much I hate politics?"

"Yes, and loudly. This is important, though, Shepard. A lot of people, and a lot of geth, lost their lives when the quarians attacked. If we can prevent that, if we can get them to work with each other without bloodshed, then shouldn't we do that?"

"Geth don't have blood. They have...oil...or something," she sighed. "Alright. It's not like I have anything better to do until the Normandy gets fixed. But, uh, how do you plan on telling the quarians to expect a geth ship? I'm fairly certain they'll shoot on sight. As will anyone else if they see it beyond the Persius Veil."

"I'm sending a ship to pick him up. He'll be loaded into a packing crate, no one will know he's there. Explaining it to the quarians will be more difficult. It might be better if we handled things someplace neutral. Like the Normandy."

"...I'll flay you alive, with my mind," Shepard muttered under her breath. It wasn't that she was worried that Liara was indoctrinated, but sometimes she did, and said, things that reminded the sprectre a bit too much of the asari's mother. Packing geth into crates to avoid detection was hitting just a little too close to home in Shepard's book. "Is that really necessary? Packing crates aren't exactly roomy. And I don't know how anyone will take anything seriously if we try to hold discussions on a dead ship."

Liara leaned back, tenting her fingers as she stared at Shepard. "It was Legions idea, but yes I see the resemblance to what my mother did," she said, answering the hinted at question, "It is effcient, however. As for the Normandy, I was thinking it might be best to wait until it's repaired."

"I thought we were going to the Citadel?"

"The crucible is still at least a month away from completion, and that's if everything goes well. We have time. Please Shepard. We're here, and how likely is it that we'll make it back to the fleet before they decide to attack? Admiral Xen is getting closer every day to perfecting her device, and if she does, and they don't have the Reapers to fall back on, the geth will die."

Shepard shook her head once, then let her face fall into her hands. "Think, for a minute, about what you just said."

Shepard liked Legion, that was true enough, and she certainly didn't think the geth deserved to be wiped out, but the almost desperate tone in Liara's voice threw her. She didn't know what had happened to make her so concerned about a group of AIs but it was certainly a strange thing to see. The last interaction Liara had had with the geth, in Shepard's memory, had been when they'd fought them on the Citadel. At the time, all of them had had taken a little too much delight in watching the waves of geth fall before them.

"I know, it's not something you expect to hear on a quarian ship. It's just that, with everything they went through, the fact that their early stages of self-realization led to the war...and then...to have them die the way they did, after everything was so...there was peace. The quarians and the geth were working together. It was..." Liara laughed sadly and ran a hand over her crest almost nervously. "When it was over, we really thought that it meant that everything would be okay. If they could find peace, then why couldn't we find it too? If you could make them work together again, it would be child's play to defeat the Reapers."

"If I did such a great job of bringing them together, what happened to the geth? You just said they died."

Liara sighed, "I don't know what happened while you were on the Citadel, Shepard. But, eventually, there was a blinding wave of red light, and afterward nothing based of Reaper tech worked. For a few months, nothing electronic worked at all with any reliability. They said it was a bit like an EMP pulse, but it completely disabled the Reapers. And, because the geth were running on Reaper upgrades, it shut them down too."

"I killed them," Shepard said slowly. She wasn't sure it was possible to kill a geth, they weren't alive, but that word was as good as any.

"You did what you had to, Shepard. And we thought, early on, that we'd be able to restart them. Tali thought she could, but then the quarians left and... the geth had been allies but only for a few weeks. No one really wanted to put the man power into starting them back up. Maybe, if the quarians made it home, they were able to on Rannoch, I don't know. You didn't have a choice, then, but you do now."

"I'll think about it. But first I have to find out what trouble we'll be in for bringing a geth into the fleet, even if it's on my ship" She reached out and took Liara's hand as she stood, smiling down at her. "It's really damn cute how excited you get about this stuff, sometimes," she said, and then laughed at Liara's returning glare. "I'll see you."

Liara turned in her chair to watch her go, and wondered, for what felt like the millionth time, if she was going the right thing.

* * *

The bed was cold. The room was cold. Liara was cold.

She had spent so many years sleeping alone – her entire life until just a couple months ago – that it had never occurred to her that she would get used to having someone else in her bed. When Illira had been young the girl had occasionally crawled into bed with her mother after a nightmare, or during a thunderstorm, but that was different. Tonight, for the first time since she'd taken Shepard from Earth, she was sleeping alone. And she was cold.

Shepard had, reluctantly, conceded that not only would she agree to Liara's plan to help negotiate peace between the geth and the quarians, but that it was the right thing to do. Liara had been overjoyed. With EDI's future on the rocks and the Normandy offline she had seen it as a way to make up for causing all that trouble. It was a way to give back to Tali for all she had done for her on Earth. Then Shepard had told her that in order to try and bring around the quarians to the idea of meeting with a geth, of all things, she would need to have their undivided attention. Which meant drifting between ships while she spoke with each of the admirals. And up to a week away from home.

Home. This wasn't home. This was a room, about the third the size of Shepard's cabin on the Normandy with nothing but a bed in it. It was white; even the sheets were white. Everything blended into each other, and she had difficulty making out where the wall met the floor, except where the door sat, sunk slightly into the wall. She hadn't noticed how stark it was while Shepard was here. They hadn't spent much time in this room, in truth, over the two weeks they'd been here. Shepard had been antsy, unable to stay still except when, in the early hours in the morning, she'd collapsed onto the starched, white sheets.

It had allowed Liara to take a more active role, again, in her information network. When Shepard had left for the Quib-Quib that morning, they'd said a short goodbye, and Liara had spent the rest of the day perched on a broken console in one dark corner of the ship. She'd forgotten to eat, and late in the evening Amerra had discovered her corner and brought her dinner. She'd been curt with her daughter's future mother-in-law, and had hated the distraction, but once her datapads were put away she'd found she'd been hungry. Amerra had left her alone, and she'd eaten in silence, before coming back up here and sliding into bed.

She'd thought it a good idea at the time; she'd not been exactly tired, but she'd been suffering from some serious eye strain. As soon as she'd curled up under the blankets, however, the chilled sheets had woken her up. She'd been lying there, staring at the ceiling, for what seemed like days. Giving up sleep as a dream that was currently unreachable, she sat up and reached for her data pad again. She went to check on Feron's progress on Eden Prime – so far Cerberus hadn't been able to gain a foothold, but they weren't giving up – but changed her mind. Instead, she linked the pad to her omni-tool and connected to the asari central democracy site.

When she'd spoken to her father, she'd written off everything the matriarch had said to her. With Udina's death, the attack on Cerberus, meeting Teiron again, and the issues with EDI and the Normandy, she hadn't had any time to think about it. It had tugged at the back of her mind though, sitting, like the comforting weight of Shepard at the base of her head. Speaking with Tali, before the Normandy had shut down, had brought it to the forefront, though. The story of Liara and Yuterl and Athame. The story swirled in her mind, but more than that, something her father had said.

_Damn mother's a fucking High Priestess..._

She'd never considered that the T'Soni name might mean something more that galactic politics. She'd never thought that the visits to the temple had been anything more than a history lesson. There was one way to find out, though.

Asari politics were done entirely over the extranet. The e-democracy could be volatile and quick, or sluggishly slow. She'd never paid much attention, in truth. That had been her mother's job. But, it had one large advantage. Everything got recorded at some point. And everything was public record.

She logged in, after wracking her brain to remember what her password was. She was inundated, seconds later, with requests to enter into various discussion groups. She ignored them all, and the requests for private chats – her mother had set up her account within the democracy, using the family name, and it was much too well known for Liara's comfort. It was a matter of moments to get into the records, and still fielding the occasional message, find those about the church.

The records went back about five thousand years, or to the beginning of the Thessian global government. Prior to that, Thessia had been a group of disjointed tribes that had barely seen each other. Single, large towns often surrounded by a number of tiny villages had made up most of the planet. They'd kept in contact by runners, and traveling minstrels, but each had governed itself. With the creation of a global communication system, it had been a shock to find that there had been such homogony amoung the various city-states.

What she saw when she pulled those records was a shock, even though part of her had been expecting it.

Irili re'Gris

Oralia T'Soni

Rillna T'Soni

Lawran T'Soni

Marie'Lia T'Soni

Krista T'Soni

Rolya T'Soni

Tuliralan T'Soni

Neeca T'Soni

Prill Ol'Yeir

…

Kor Ol'Yeir

The list was long, but the one thing that Liara noticed, once the T'Soni name left the list, was that the family name did not change again. Her mother had taught her her family history, or so she'd thought, and she knew that the Ol'Yeir name had not died out, but had rather been folded into the T'Soni's when two tribes had merged some six or seven thousand years before. They had taken the T'Soni name, but for at least a generation, though they had interbred, only the Ol'Yeir had given birth to T'Soni children. Her entire family, her entire line, had been in the church. It explained much of how she'd been treated, the church wasn't looked well on,less than one percent of asari still followed the Athame Doctrine. Being a priestess had always been a calling that very few had heard, but until her mother, it seemed, a T'Soni had always heard it.

She wanted to ask about it, but she couldn't. She was the last.

The T'Soni name had never been large, though she'd always known that it had been well known, if not respected. She had just never expected why.

Athame's daughter's walk the sea.

Her father had said that, in many of her dreams. She chuckled to herself, at where her mind was going. The idea, that she was actually descended from the daughters in her father's story was ridiculous. Even in her wildest fantasy's as a child, trying to think of who her father could be, she had never once considered that she was related to the Goddess. She shook her head, still laughing. At least it explained why her mother had insisted on naming her as she had. The likely reason was guilt for not following in her own mother's footsteps and entering the church. Liara had often felt the need to do small, inconsequential things that would please her mother if she ever found out about them.

Perhaps it was having found out the history of her line, something she had never considered important as a child, or perhaps it was her crazy thoughts about her lines parentage, but whatever the reason, she logged out, and instead brought up her copy of the holy texts.

She hadn't read them since she was a child. Although her mother had never made a big deal about it, they had had a large, bound copy in the study. Again, it made so much more sense now, though it had never even registered when she'd been young.

She flipped through it, never reading more than a few lines from any of the parables before moving on. She eventually fell into reading the story of Athame teaching the bakers children chemistry. She was about half way through it when the door chime beeped. She got up and grabbed her robe before answering the door.

"Hello, Dr. T'Soni. I hope I did not wake you. I was hoping to speak with Shepard," EDI said. "I have heard that she was quite upset that the Normandy was out of commission."

"EDI! You're okay! I hadn't thought they'd made any progress on getting the Normandy running again! And no, I was up." Liara said, stepping aside to let the AI into the room. She stood just to the left of the door, hands clasped behind her back, and Liara sat on the edge of the bed.

"Yes. Although there had still be difficulty in getting the mass effect drives running again, they were able to restore me. Hopefully, things should be running again shortly."

"I am just glad that you're okay. I was worried about you."

"As were many of the crew, if I may judge by their reactions when I came on board. Are you and Shepard having a disagreement?"

Liara smiled, and shook her head, "No. Is there a reason we should be?"

"Not at all Dr. T'Soni. I had just been informed that both of you were staying in these quarters, and as she is not here, the logical conclusion is that you are having relationship problems."

"Shepard is on the Quib-Quib. She's going to be hosting Legion on the Normandy once its running for peace talks. She just has to get the admirals behind us first."

"A difficult proposition. The geth rebellion is a defining moment of quarian history. It is why they lost their seat on the council."

"That's why she'd not here. Getting the admirals to come to this will be harder than getting the Salarians to the war summit."

"War summit?" EDI asked.

"Never mind. I'm sure she'll be glad to see you, though."

"Yes. I believe she will be relived that I was not permanently nonfunctional. I have a personal question, if I may, Dr. T'Soni."

Liara patted the bed beside her. EDI cocked her head to the side, then sat beside her. "If I can ask one first."

"Always, Dr. T'Soni."

"How are you?"

"I am working at approximately 85% normal capacity. Although the ship can not fly under its own power, I have control of most of the systems. Once the drive core is back online, I should be fully functional. I have better control over this mobile unit as well. I believe that I could be useful on ground missions, though I must say that since leaving Earth, Shepard has not gotten into nearly as many risky situations as she did while we were hunting the Collectors. My question to you is the same, Dr. T'Soni."

"I am fine, EDI. Although I think I've discovered that I may use Shepard as a pillow a bit more often than I should, I was having difficulty sleeping."

"I do not mean this evening. Rather, I was referring to your illness. I have had much time to think about it. While this unit and the Normandy were off line, my backup processors were still running, though I could not accept new outside data nor interact with anyone aboard ship. I believe this was an oversight, but the result was that I was able to review the information regarding your symptoms in great detail, as I had little else to occupy my time. I also believe I may have found what it is that you and Shepard must accomplish on the Citadel. I will send it to your omni-tool once I have access to those systems on the Normandy."

Liara sighed, and wondered if she should have gone with Shepard. She'd been asked by the spectre, but had stayed behind to work. No, she had to be honest with herself, it was to avoid having to deal the quarian admirals. She really hadn't gotten along with any of them except for Tali. Had she known that EDI had been spending the last two weeks thinking about her illness, she would have gladly put up with the quarians .

"I am fine, really EDI. Tell me, how did they get you working?"

"I know you do not care about that, Dr. T'Soni. They have had a group of people working on the Normandy nonstop since they attempted to reboot me. You find my having thought on your condition upsetting. I was merely trying to help. I believe I may have found the root cause."

"I've heard that before, and thank you, really, for trying. But I am fine."

"That is not accurate. A close examination of your scans shows that there is a variable pattern to your brain waves in the part of the brain that controls asari biotics. It would not be noticeable under normal observation, however I was able to break the scan down to its base waves. Only the secondary, echo waves were effected. That is, those brain waves that would, in-utero, have matched your mothers. Upon birth, these brain waves should have fallen into synch with your own; they have not. A further study of the Normandy's medical files reveal they are 97% in synch with Commander Shepard's last scan."

Liara rubbed the back of her neck. She'd known this in a vague, it-has-to-be-something sort of way. She'd never heard of anything like this happening, which was probably why none of the doctors had looked for it. It was this 'echo' that allowed asari to meld, to attune their bodies to the nervous systems of other beings and then return to themselves. The lingering feeling of the meld was an aid to conception, but at its most basic it was nothing more than the brains ability to separate the nervous system into these two, distinct, parts that caused it. It didn't explain how she knew that Shepard was somewhere off to her left, too far away to feel distinctly, but it would explain why she had been unable to meld with Teiron.

Having a scientific explanation on how she was broken didn't change the fact that she was, though.

"Don't tell Shepard."

"I believe that Shepard is concerned about your health. Having this information might make it easier on her, and would allow her to more readily research possible cures for your condition. Knowing what is causing your symptoms should allow medical staff to devise a cure."

"This doesn't effect anyone but me," Liara sighed, "I just wish Shepard would leave it alone."

"It did not effect your relationship with the asari we encountered on the Cerberus station?" There was a minor pause, long enough for an organic to take a breath, or EDI to scan the entire extranet. "Teiron Reila, Born 1964, Earth calendar. Work history: Brink, bar, Thessia, waitress 2049-2092, Chora's Den, bar, Citadel, dancer, 2092-2093, Armax Arsenal Supply, weapons manufacturer, Citadel, guard, 2093-2179, Nos Astra Shipping Company, transport company, Illium, guard 2180-2184, Thessia, Personal Guard to Matriarch Helia 2184-present. Currently serving on Omega, believed to be spying on Matriarch T'Loak for Matriarch Helia. Aria T'Loak believed to be aware of purpose."

"She's what?" Liara breathed, ignoring the question. Was this what Shepard had felt when she'd found out that Liara had cast aside her studies into the Protheans to become an information broker? Did the human feel this same burning in the pit of her stomach that it was all her fault? At least that explained why Aria had sent her to Cronos, though – she probably expected the untrained girl with the weak biotics to die in the first wave. Liara almost regretted giving Aria the heads up on the Cerberus attack.

"She is currently in the employ of Matriarch Helia, but serving on Omega. I believe this is a fairly common practice among asari."

"Right...I mean, yes, it is. And what happened between us worked out better because of," she waved a hand at her temples, "this."

"That is an incorrect statement. Given your elevated heart rate during your meeting with her on the Cerberus station, as well as your reaction to many of Shepard's attempts at humor following the encounter, it is more accurate to say that your relationship with Teiron Reila was never...'worked out'."

"There was no relationship. She was just a friend. I am...tired. I'll talk to you tomorrow? I'll take you to see Shepard."

EDI stood, and stared down at Liara for a long time. Liara met her gaze, though the deep, dark eyes set into the pale skin of the body before her was a bit unsettling. There would be no need for Joker to pass her off as a personal assistance mech this time around; it was next to impossible to tell that EDI wasn't human. Perhaps she blinked a bit too infrequently, and held herself a bit stiffly, but otherwise there was no way to tell she wasn't made of flesh and blood. They held each others eyes, neither backing down, until finally EDI shook her head.

"Dr. T'Soni, perhaps I am out of line to say this, but as it is my belief that your friends will not inform you of this, I feel that I must. What you are doing is self destructive. Shepard is trying to help you. She is aware that your relationship with her is confined, at its maximum limit, to her lifespan which is, even with her Cerberus implants, but a fraction of your own. She worries about leaving you alone. You consistently ignoring the concerns of those around you for your health is not helping them, nor yourself. Perhaps you should speak with them, honestly?"

"You don't know what you're talking about EDI. I am perfectly well."

"Have you considered that your difficulties are mental?"

Liara bit back a growl of frustration, and a desire to hit the AI. Like she hadn't thought about that every day since she'd woken up in a hospital, a pretty blue face asleep beside her? Human stories spoke of on true love; that one person who is perfect, and the hero of the story lives happily ever after with. Asari stories, modern asari stories, weren't like that. The heroine might find their love, but it was always a fleeting thing. Even those in which the asari falls for a krogan were often tainted with the fact that it wouldn't last. From infancy asari were taught that love, though powerful, and all encompassing, was ephemeral. Though asari mothers with young children rarely bonded with another until their children were older, there was an expectation that every asari would find love more than once.

She had accepted this from the time she was small; her mother had had a string of lovers from the time Liara was about twenty until she'd left home, and she had thought that was why she had waited so many decades to take her first lover. But that wasn't right. She had simply never been attracted to anyone before Shepard. Some of the young men, and the occasional woman, on her digs, of all races, had flirted with her. As a student she'd ignored it, often spending an unnecessary amount of time with the lead professor on the digs to keep her would-be suitors away. Once she'd received her doctorate, she'd simply pretended she had not heard them. And then Shepard had rescued her, and she had felt things that she hadn't known it was possible to feel. She'd written them off, originally, as gratitude for Shepard saving her life, but it hadn't taken long for her to come to terms with the fact that it was much more than that. And Shepard had returned her feelings, and things had been very much like a human story.

When Shepard had died, that first time, she'd taken her body to Cerberus in order to get the woman she loved back. When she'd met Teiron, she hadn't been certain that such a feat would ever happen. She'd been a broken mess of what she had once been, and Teiron, with a line of bad jokes and worse stories and a whole lot of alcohol, had slowly put her back together. She had not loved Teiron as she loved Shepard, not with the same all encompassing devotion she felt for the spectre, but she had, days after Teiron had walked out of her life, finally realized what her people had meant about loving more than once. Because she had loved her. And Shepard's jokes when the two had met had hurt all the more because of it. Because if she hadn't been sick, and Shepard hadn't come back to her, she could easily have been happy with the other asari.

And that thought made her ill, like she wasn't good enough..

"Yes. I have. I did. Frequently. But I came to terms with Shepard's death, after the war, and nothing changed."

"Perhaps you should let her know that?" EDI asked. "It is highly likely that Shepard's desire to help you is based on the belief that, as you were forced to raise her daughter alone, you were unable to, to use the human phrase, move on. Sleep well, Dr. T'Soni."

Without waiting for a reply, EDI left, leaving an emotionally torn asari to fall back onto the bed and lay awake the rest of the night.


	17. Chapter 17

**Authors Note: I made it back alive! OMGOMGOMG, I'm alive! This desert rat went into the great northwest, stayed a week beside the Columbia River (holy crap the Astoria bridge is kickass!) and didn't DIE!**

**But I also didn't get nearly as much of this written as I wanted. There is apparently a "no electronics" rule or something when camping and ALL the inlaws were there. All of them. And I didn't know most of them. And then the car's A/C compressor shorted out in Vegas on the trip home, and driving through the Mojave without A/C in August isn't conducive to writing, so yeah. But! We're nearing the end now! I can see the light at the end of the tunnel! **

**Oh, and on a side note, there is a hotel in Vegas called "Aria", but my husband wouldn't let me go inside and ask if there was "one rule on the strip" to see what people would say. I was sad :( **

* * *

Liara nuzzled Shepard's shoulder, sliding a knee between the sleeping human's legs. She was barely awake herself, but it was so good to have Shepard back in the bed with her. It was even better to be back on the Normandy, in their bed, the soft glow of the fish tank making the room seem to shimmer. Not that she could see it. She kept her eyes shut tight, just enjoying the warmth of her lover. An unexpected contented sigh slipped past her lips, and she felt rather than heard Shepard chuckle.

"You're insatiable," came the muffled sound of Shepard's voice a second later.

Liara blushed at the misconception. It wasn't entirely inaccurate, the pleasant soreness that seemed to encompass her entire body was proof enough of that.

"You are warm," she said as way of defense, spreading her fingers against Shepard's stomach and stifling a yawn.

"I love you, Liara, but I would like to get a couple of hours of sleep before I have to play diplomat."

She kissed Shepard's shoulder blade, but didn't move away, her eyes still tightly closed. "You've had a couple hours sleep."

"Together. A couple hours of sleep together." Even sleep tinged as it was, the humor was evident in her voice, and Liara smiled. She still didn't move though, having had no intentions beyond sleeping herself when she'd rolled up against Shepard's back.

"I'm not stopping you."

Sleep refused to come to her though, even as she felt Shepard's breathing even back out. She ran through a series of sleep-aid meditations she'd learned after Shepard's first death, and though she was left feeling relaxed and tired, sleep continued to elude her. She rolled away from Shepard, laying on her back. She finally opened her eyes, staring up at the stars above her. They were moving at below FTL speeds which almost made it look like they were standing still. In an hour, the stars above her head would be different, but the stars slipped by so slowly as to be near unnoticable. She rubbed her eyes with the heels of her hands, rolled back over, facing away from Shepard and buried her head in her pillow.

Sleep began to creep around the edges of her mind, lulling her. She embraced it, letting the familiar room, and the warm presence of her lover draw her back to it.

That's when the singing began.

It took her a long minute to figure out what the noise was, and where it was coming from. Her mind regained consciousness reluctantly. She sat up, glancing at Shepard, amazed the trained soldier wasn't already wide awake. The singing came to a crescendo. The tune was familiar, though she couldn't place it or make out the words. She slipped silently out of bed, padding barefoot across the cold metal until she found her pants and Shepard's discarded tank top. The singing died as she pulled the shirt over her head, but she knew roughly where it was coming from. Still barefoot, she headed for the door.

There was no one on the small landing outside, nor was the elevator in use. Though she knew the thought was foolish, she glanced over the edge of the railing anyway, but as expected there wasn't anyone hanging from it. Writing the noise off to a dream, she went back inside. She'd never get back to sleep now, but she could throw on some real clothes and head down to her office. She headed for the bathroom, and saw Shepard buttoning the collar of her dress blues.

She smiled at the sight of her, pressed and polished. She loved Shepard in full regalia. She'd rarely seen it, the woman preferring her N7 jacket and t shirts, or her standard fatigues. Still, Shepard really hadn't gotten enough sleep the night before.

"What are you doing up?" Liara asked.

"Mine eyes have seen the glory," Shepard said.

The words seemed familiar, and they seemed to echo in Liara's head. It hardly answered her question though.

"Mine eyes have seen the glory," Shepard repeated, "of the coming of the Lord."

That was it. The singing she'd heard just moments before, this had been it; an old Earth battle hymn. Illira had liked it when she'd been about twelve, but Liara hadn't heard it since.

"If you say so Shepard. I'm going to take a shower," she said, pointedly. Experiments months before had proven it was impossible for them both to get ready at the same time, for multiple reasons, not including the fact that the shower would quickly soak through Shepard's dress blues.

Shepard reached out, placing a single finger on Liara's chest, just above her heart. "Mine eyes-" she started, though now she spoke in asari.

There was a loud bang from the other side of the wall.

"Mine eyes," she said again, and the banging returned.

Liara sat bolt upright in bed. The dream faded, but the pounding continued. Shepard was already up and out of bed. She'd grabbed her pistol from the side table and was moving, crouched and naked, toward the door. She padded silently on bare feet, lit only by the glow of the fish tank. It didn't take Liara much longer to fully awaken, but she paused long enough to hunt down her robe. She doubted that anyone on the other side wished them harm, though she accepted that Shepard always assumed the worst. Shepard had one hand out, ready to open the door and take out whoever was trying to get in from the other side, when a call came with the relentless banging.

"Shepard! Hurry the hell up," Garrus shouted.

Before Liara could get, "Shepard, no!" past her lips, the spectre had opened the door. Garrus had his fist raised to knock again, and it fell slowly as he took in Shepard. She had her hands on her hips, her pistol still clutched in one of them. She stared at him defiantly, her eyes daring him to say something about her state of undress. Liara felt herself flush, despite not only having her robe safely cinched around her her waist, but also being outside Garrus' view from the door.

"I...um...there's been...do you want to put some clothes on?" Garrus stammered, confusion written on his face. He kept his eyes trained over Shepard's shoulder, though obviously attempting not to smile

"You told me to hurry, I didn't think you'd want me to wait to find my clothes. And I was worried that my door wouldn't withstand much more of your trying to knock it down."

"Right. It's just, um, the geth...I...uh..." Garrus' eyes darted down, and Shepard smiled at him cockily. His eyes snapped back up to hers, and he shook his head slowly.

Liara sighed, and decided that she was clothed enough to take pity on him, or maybe it was Shepard that needed it. Garrus looked more amused than uncomfortable. She came up behind Shepard and laid a hand on her shoulder.

"Legion is asking to speak with you, Shepard," he said after an obligatory, "Sorry, Liara." He did keep his eyes trained on the asari now though, and Liara thought maybe his amusement was a bit of an act.

"I'm over here, Garrus. And I don't see why that constitutes you breaking down my door while I'm sleeping."

"He has a half dozen geth with him, and they're causing some issues with some of the crew. Lieutenant O'Feir attempted to shoot them. We prevented it, but it's caused some serious tension. We're going to have a riot on our hands if someone doesn't step in."

"Not feeling up to handling a few distraught human soldiers Garrus?" Shepard laughed.

"I can handle them just fine. Just didn't think you want me restraining, and possibly incarerating, half the crew. Legion's shut down the other geth, but he didn't seem happy about it. He wants to talk to you, and the crew is demanding you send them away."

"That isn't going to happen," Liara said. "Shepard, get dressed before you give Garrus a heart attack."

"You're no fun. And he's a soldier, aren't you Garrus? You can handle a little skin," Shepard smirked.

"Nothing I haven't seen before," he said, though this confused amusement on his face changed to a subtle appology as he kept his gaze trained on Liara. She shrugged at him, it wasn't like she was threatened by Garrus, nor Shepard's apparent disregard for decorum. Traynor she might have had issue with. Garrus, though, was Shepard's best friend. He was as much a threat as Ashley, which meant he wasn't one. He did seem to be getting slightly more uncomfortable the longer Shepard continued to not have any intention of putting clothes on, though.

"You two are no fun," Shepard sighed, turning from the door. "I'll be down in a minute. Tell Ashley to relieve O'Feir of duty until the geth are gone. And make sure to tell her it won't go on her record, but that the last thing we want is an incident. And contact the quarians. We can start a little early, since you decided to wake me up so damn early."

"I was certain you'd prefer that to a hull breech."

Shepard laughed, "You're probably right." She dug through the clothes that had been tossed haphazardly around the room the night before, and Liara felt her blush rising. The crew was well aware that they she stayed in Shepard's room, and she knew none of them were naive enough to not know what they did, but there was something about having Garrus watch Shepard pick up the torn remains of her pants – she really did need to be more cautious with how she used her biotics, or Shepard wouldn't have any clothes left if they had to be separated for any length of time again – from the floor. She cleared her throat nervously, suddenly acutely aware again that she was wearing nothing more than the thin, almost translucent, robe designed to be worn over her night clothes, and not over her nude body.

"Tell Legion we will not be long," she said, and quickly shut the door before Garrus could answer.

"Honestly, Liara, you'd think you had never seen me naked before," Shepard chuckled, forgoing putting clothes on and heading for the shower.

"I may have, but Garrus has not. And I would appreciate it if you did not show off what is mine to the entire crew," she answered, standing beside the door to the bathroom.

"Yours, huh? And Garrus isn't the entire crew. He's Garrus. And he did tell me to hurry."

"You could have told him to wait for a moment while you put something on. I do not think he would have minded."

She caught only the beginning of Shepard's laugh as the water turned on in the shower.

* * *

Twenty minutes later, both of them showered, and thankfully clothed, they walked into a tense staring contest in the cargo hold.

A half dozen of the crew, a cross section of all the different races currently on board, were staring down Legion. Or, rather, they were trying to. For his part, Legion looked bored, as much as a geth can be said to show emotion anyway. He was standing in front of a six open crates, each one with a just-visible geth deactivated inside it. When the elevator doors opened, he turned his head toward it, and the assembled crew jumped slightly. Shepard guessed he probably hadn't so much as shifted the flaps around the light on his head since they'd arrived. It took a moment, but the crew eventually turned to look where his gaze had shifted to, and as soon as they saw Shepard they scurried off to look busy.

"Shepard-Commander," Legion said, moving toward her and Liara. "We have shut down the other mobile units we brought with us. We apologize for the miscommunication. We were unaware that we should not have activated them."

"It's fine Legion. I should have been more clear when I told them you would be arriving. I was just preoccupied with how the quarian would react. You wanted to speak with me?"

"Yes. We would like to thank you. When we returned to the collective, we did not expect to see you again so soon. We would like to inform you that we have begun preparations against the upcoming threat from the Old Machines. We appreciate that you would attempt to help us make peace with the creators. Even in the event that we fail to achieve consensus with them, we would like to thank you for being willing to try."

"Don't thank me, thank Liara. It was her idea."

Legion turned to Liara, who had been walking a step behind them as they moved through the geth units reactivating them. He flared the flaps around his head and said, "We are grateful, Liara T'Soni. You are the one that contacted us."

"Yes. The conflict is so pointless."

"The creators do not share your view."

"No. Though I would say they are biased. They started a war that led to their being driven from their homes."

Shepard had seen Legion surprised only once before – when she had offered his hand to him after activating him. She hadn't recognized it for what it was then, but seeing a similar reaction from him now, that was the only thing she could think that it could be.

"You are aware of the history of the Morning War?"

Liara nodded, and Shepard could see that she was considering whether to tell him how she knew. She hadn't heard this particular tale from her yet. She'd supposed she should have asked, when all of this had started, but with the exception of Legion, Shepard still had some lingering issues with the geth. She did know that something had happened, something that had made her even consider that peace was an option, and she'd get the details from Liara eventually.

"Shepard," EDI said overhead, breaking the silence that had settled between them, " a quarian shuttle is asking permission to dock."

"Thank you EDI. Permission granted." She moved to the other side of the half-finished armory, and put up the force field once the geth, once again reactivated, had joined her.

Liara led Legion and the six other units up the elevator to the CIC. It never ceased to amaze her how silently they moved. In London she had seen them sneak up on a banshee and take it out before it had even known they were there. At the time, she had thought it had more to do with the Reaper upgrades the geth had received, but now she wasn't so sure. If she didn't keep glancing over her shoulder, she wouldn't have known they were following her.

Though they were running half shifts, since they were surrounded by the quarian fleet and were unlikely to be attacked, the CIC was packed. Though everyone appeared to be busy when she stepped off the elevator, she could feel hidden eyes following them. She saw a few people working at stations that weren't even on. Conversation died for a moment as the geth followed her around the corner toward the war room, but the whispers began before the door had shut behind them.

She considered going back out and confronting them, but the first time she had met Legion, attached as he had been to the signal booster, she had had much the same reaction when Shepard had greeted him as an old friend. It hadn't been so long ago, in their eyes, that they had been at war with the geth, and it was understandable that they would find having seven of them on board now, and not under heavy guard, disconcerting.

"Liara T'Soni, we would like to ask you what you know of the Morning War," Legion said, once they were in the small conference area. The glass partition hadn't been installed yet, but additional chairs had been brought in. The geth, however, were ignoring them.

"It's a very long story," she said, going to stand by the outer bulkhead.

"We are unaware of any organic, other than the creators, being aware of the events of the war, and they have largely forgotten much of what happened."

"Shepard entered the consensus."

"This is a falsity."

"Shepard _will_ enter the consensus. Or would have. It is very complicated."

"Please explain."

Her first reaction was to tell him she couldn't. Already too many people knew. She doubted that anything could happen at this point if another knew – the past was irreparably changed. She hated herself for having done it, but at the same time if things went the way she hoped she would have saved hundreds of thousands of lives.

"I'm sorry, Legion. I...can't."

"We do not understand." Legion stared at her, and she felt mildly guilty. It wasn't his fault. She had never been very close to Legion personally, and though she knew that the geth she had interacted with on Earth had recieved a part of him in order to reach full intelligence, she still could not bring herself to once again go against her daughter's advice. She already had much too frequently.

"Things happened that I can't talk about. I wish I could explain."

"Shepard-Commander has never been within the consensus. No organic has entered the consensus.""

"Wait a few months," Liara muttered under her breath.

"Time travel," Legion said, "is currently not viable for organics." He paused, then continued, "The former heretic geth claim the Old Machines have knowledge of such technology. It was deemed to be unstable."

Liara stared, dumbfounded. She'd apparently forgotten how good geth hearing was. Or maybe Legion had learned to read lips. She wondered what he meant by 'unstable', but before she could ask Shepard walked in followed by the four admirals.

* * *

Two weeks, near a thousand arguments, and no progress later, Shepard was ready to call the whole thing bust. The geth were willing to make a lot of concessions, and in the first half hour she had thought the thing would be over and done with quickly. Unfortunately, Liara had stepped in and quashed all her ideas. No, the geth would not be given to Admiral Xen to dissect, and no, they would not be forced back into servitude; they were not slaves. At this point, though Legion had thanked her, the quarians had refused to budge. Fifteen days later, and they were at the same standstill they'd been at when they'd started. Xen wanted personal slaves, Gerral wanted reparations, Koris and Raan were just happy to have the home world back, but seemed unwilling to question the other two. The quarians were still short their fifth admiral, and though some talk about bringing another into the proceedings had been discussed early on, it had been shot down rather quickly. This left the quarians without a tie breaking vote, and had left them in a deadlock.

It didn't help that the quarians seemed to be under the impression that the geth were incapable of independent thought. That the geth were so quick to conceed to their demands didn't help matters, either. Every day, it seemed, Shepard had to keep reminding the quarians that the geth were there of their own free will, and that they were to be treated with respect. She often had to remind her own crew, and sometimes herself, of that fact as well, though they, at least, seemed to get it faster than the quarians did. Then again, her crew had little interaction with the geth. They stayed in the conference room even when talks were completed for the day. Legion said they had no need to wander the ship, and that the obvious nervousness he and his companions caused could be mitagated by their staying away from them.

Liara seemed almost pleased with the whole thing. Progress was slow Liara had said the week before, and hadn't changed her mind since. If she didn't love her so much...

Admittedly, over the last couple of days, Liara had become much more antsy. The red line on the calendar on the bedroom clock was creeping closer every day. Liara hadn't heard from Hackett recently about the state of the crucible, and that wasn't helping her mood. Yet, when it came to the shouting matches (usually between the quarians and Shepard; the geth were very calm about the whole thing) that occurred around the conference table, she saw it all as for the good.

Today, so far at least, there had not been any shouting, screaming, or thrown objects. Admiral Xen was even being almost polite. Still, though, they weren't getting anywhere. Liara's restrictions, which, after two weeks with the geth, Shepard had to agree were a good idea, made it difficult to get anywhere in the negotiations. The longer this went, the more Shepard had to concede that it wasn't the geth that were being unreasonable. Her original opinion, no matter how much she had like Legion, was that the geth must have overpowered, outmaneuvered and more or less kicked the quarians off their planet. Though Liara had told her that wasn't the case, she hadn't been prepared to believe it. Seeing them now, and how...excited, for want of a better word...the geth seemed at having the quarians back on Rannoch, Shepard was seeing both sides in a new light. The quarians were completely unwilling to accept that the geth could think, or act, for themselves.

And it was clear they could. The often slow way they came to any agreement was evidence of that. Legion had a hard enough time himself coming to consensus; when he linked with the other six geth units it took exponentially longer, though still faster than the quarians.

Everything seemed to be faster than the quarians.

She leaned back in her chair, listening to Xen expound on why the geth could not simply be allowed to have some of the more inhospitable parts of the planet to live their lives in peace. That had been the compromise Shepard had put forth four days before. The geth had jumped on the idea – Legion had said that it had taken less than 4.5766213 seconds to come consensus - agreeing to live at the poles as well as some of the desert areas. They were in the process of building a superstructure that could hold nearly every geth process – it was a massive undertaking, but had been started in what the quarians had decided would be their new capital, however. And yet, the geth had agreed to dismantle it, and move the structure to a less organic-friendly area.

And then Garrel had apparently seen some sort of tactical weakness and had cut the proceedings short. An hour later, housing all geth in a single location was deemed a security risk.

The geth had agreed to not finish their structure, and instead build a series of smaller structures. Garrel had agreed to this, as long as they were spaced fairly far apart.

Which had led to this, and Xen stating that the lack of mobile units was a problem, and because the quarians would not be able to enter these areas without fear of encountering a geth they could properly communicate with, the geth could not have any land at all.

Shepard was fairly certain that in any other circumstances she'd have shot Xen through her mask and laughed while she did it.

She was also fairly certain that if she did the quarians would walk out of the negotiations and attack all council races and the geth indiscriminately.

She had started leaving her side arm in her cabin after the second day.

Xen was continuing to speak, her voice raising slightly as she became more passionate. Shepard had stopped listening. The admiral would tire herself out eventually, and it made no sense to try and interrupt. She let her mind wander, going over the reports she still had to file, and the list of things the ship needed the next time they were in a port. Anything, really, to not have to listen to the quarians anymore.

"Shepard-Commander?"

Shepard jumped at the sudden interruption. Xen had been in mid-sentence and she looked ready to tear Legion apart with her bare hands – gloved hands, Shepard amended – for the interruption.

"Yes Legion?" She hoped it wasn't completely obvious that she hadn't been paying attention. She really hated politics. She had never been made to be a diplomat.

Forcing a smile in the geth's direction, she said a silent thank-you to whoever it was that had prevented her from becoming a teacher. If this was how adults – adults with power – acted, she probably would have been arrested for the murder of her entire class if she'd continued down the path she'd started as a child to become a science teacher.

Or perhaps not. She liked kids. They were honest, and didn't double-speak into what they wanted. They told you upfront and expected to be treated the same.

She silently cursed whoever had caused the accident that had prevented her from becoming a teacher.

"The geth with us have decided that it might help facilitate matters if Creator-Zorah was brought into the proceedings. We have deduced that without another influence Creators Xen and Garrel will not be content with anything you put forward by way of compromise. It leaves us at a deadlock. We believe that Creator-Zorah, with her knowledge of this unit might be able to provide another view. We have concluded that this is the most likely decision to come to consensus."

"Unacceptable," Garrel yelled at the same time the other admirals made small disapproving sounds. Even Raan, which surprised Shepard a little.

"It is not that Tali'Zorah is not well-versed in the geth, it is simply that she is much too young. We are speaking here for the entire fleet," Xen said slowly.

"Tali is highly qualified, but her youth is an issue," Raan added.

"We need to bring someone in," Shepard said, attempting to think of a compromise. "Why don't we take a short recess and continue in fifteen minutes?"

There was a lot of grumbling from the quarians, and simple assent from the geth. The longer this took, the more Shepard liked the geth. Apparently the heretics were not only Reaper sympathizers but also decidedly more aggressive. Or something. Because the geth Legion had brought with him were downright friendly, though none of them ever spoke.

Finally, the room was empty and Shepard leaned back and closed her eyes. She wanted something to shoot. It had been much too long since she'd had to shoot something. Or blow something up. She had always told herself she didn't like what she did, that the life of a soldier was what she did out of necessity not out of love. The lives of every faceless, nameless person she'd ever killed rested on her soul, and though she'd long ago come to terms with it, she didn't like it. But right now, she'd give anything for a some heavy explosives and a group of mercs trying to kill her.

With a groan she stood up and went in search of Tali. She had come on board a few days after the admirals arrived, and had been hanging around the engine room with Adams. She leaned against the cold metal of the elevator as it crawled to the right floor, trying to think of what she could do to break the deadlock. She had to agree that Tali would be her first choice, not the least because she knew that Tali knew Legion and that she would do whatever she felt was right for her people.

The doors slid open and she rounded the corner into the engine room. Her first thought was the room was empty, but then she heard voices. She followed them and found Tali and Adams standing beside the core. She stood apart from them, listening to them talk about some of the upgrades Tali had done on the collector mission as well as some things that Adams had planned for the future. She remembered the first day Tali had been on board, and how she had told Adams she'd get rid of her when he'd told her that Tali had an interest in the original Normandy's core. And how he had quickly shot her down. Back then, she had always seen them more as father and daughter, perhaps teacher and apprentice, but listening to them now, it was clear that Tali had quickly become Adams equal when it came to engines, if not his superior when it came to the Normandy.

She cleared her throat to get their attention.

"Ah, Commander," Adams started, then laughed when she glared at him, "I'm sorry Shepard. Old habits, as they say. Tali was just telling me about some of the improvement she made to the ship. I'm surprised at how much she really did, considering how much more advanced the ship was to begin with from the original Normandy. I've been trying to get her to stay on. She's always a welcome pair of hands."

"If Shepard is successful, there is going to be too much work to be done on the home world. But you are always welcome to visit, Chief."

"That's actually what I'm here about. If I could steal her away for a few minutes, Adams?"

"Just as long as she comes back, Commander."

Shepard rolled her eyes at him for the use of her no-longer title, then held out a hand for Tali to follow her.

"What is it, Shepard?"

"We're still at a deadlock," Shepard said, leaning against Tali's old station. "Legion wanted you brought it to break it."

"Shepard...," Tali said, clearly unhappy with the prospect.

"The admirals don't like the idea. I think they're a bunch of idiots, but its not like they listen to me anyway. I wanted to know who you thought would be a good choice. Not necessarily for the admiralty, but just for these talks."

"I'm hardly important enough to have a say."

"I'm asking as a friend. You know your people. You know the admirals. Your father was one of them. I just want your opinion."

Tali wrung her hands. "I'm not sure. There are a number of qualified people...I just don't know that any of them would be accepted by the admirals."

"If you don't think of someone, I'm going to be cruel and make you do it, admirals be damned. You have," she checked her omni-tool, "seven minutes."

"Seven minutes? That's hardly enough time!"

"Walk with me, and I can give you ten."

Shepard could almost hear Tali rolling her eyes, but she started walking just the same. She began listing names once they were on the elevator, most of them people Shepard had never heard of. By the time the doors opened, Shepard was sure of only one thing.

She wanted Tali in the negotionations.

She wondered exactly how she was going to break it to her friend that she'd been volunteered for something she clearly didn't want to do, and something that the leaders of her people didn't want her involved in.

They met Legion just inside the doors and Tali went to talk to him. She hoped Legion would be able to talk her into it, because she wasn't sure how she could. Raan was back in her seat, but the other admirals had yet to return. Shepard went and sat beside her.

"She's a very capable woman," she told Raan.

"I know. And at any other time I would be happy to have her help. I just don't want her drug into this. I can save her, at least, from that."

"We need her on this. Do you think you can talk the other admirals into it?"

Raan sighed, "They had already been talking about it. There were early discussions about mounting an offensive to take back the home world. We were talking about bringing her in to take her father's place."

"I don't think we need to do that. Just bring her in, as Legion said, to give a new perspective."

"I do not like how close it seems to be with Tali."

"Legion's a friend."

"It's still a machine."

"I am aware of that. He helped me stop the collectors. Don't think I don't have my doubts about them...but I trust Liara and she trusts the geth. Can I count on you?"

"I will do what I can."

Shepard nodded, hoping that would be enough. Now she just had to tell Tali.

She stood to do just that, when Liara ran into the room and skid to a halt in front of her.

Her face was flushed, her eyes wide. Shepard saw her hands trembling, and fear was written into every inch of her. She reached out a hand, but Liara stepped away.

"They're early," was all she said.


	18. Chapter 18

"What do you mean, they're early?" Shepard asked, racing behind Liara toward her office.

"Reports just came in that Reapers were seen on the edges of batarian space. The batarians weren't hit for another two weeks."

"And the crucible?"

Liara unlocked her office and quickly brought up a map of the batarian systems. A half dozen red markers blinked right on the borders of the galaxy. "I sent a message to Hackett, he hasn't gotten back with me yet. We have to make it to the Citadel. Now. I just wish I knew...was it something I did?"

Shepard watched the play of emotions of Liara's face – horror, fear, regret – and hated them. "Are you sure you just didn't get the dates wrong? It's been a long time."

"No. No. I...I remember the day they hit Earth clearly. It was the first time I had seen you in six months."

"But they're not hitting Earth now."

"No..." Liara conceded, a little reluctantly. "They're not." That wasn't it, though, it couldn't simply be that. It had only taken a few days for the Reapers to start taking out the comm buoys and move toward Earth, not two weeks.

"It will be okay, just show me what you have."

It took a little under an hour for Liara to go over everything she had.

Six Sovereign class ships were seen entering the galaxy by a small fleet of Batarian ships. Liara had had someone embedded within the Batarian hegemony, something she cursed herself for not doing the first time around, and she'd received information about it at the same time the batarian leaders had. Liara wasn't sure if it was just a scouting party or not. Sovereign class ships weren't so numerous as to be used frivolously, but the waves of ships that had marked the start of the war had certainly consisted of more than six. The batarians were tracking their movements, but she held little hope of them surviving more than a week without reinforcements.

"I'll see if the council can send something out that way. It's the least I can do," Shepard told her.

"I doubt they'll be willing, or that there is enough time. I have ships ready to help with evacuations, but I don't think even they will get there fast enough."

Shepard sighed and looked up at the monitors. This is what they had been planning for. This is what Liara had told her would happen. She'd been expecting it for years, since Virmire, since she'd discovered the cold truth about Sovereign. Still, the fact that it was happening, that they were _there_ and she'd been _right_ made her feel just a little sick. She could only pray that everything Liara had planned for would work; that her own intuition about what she'd said in the shard was correct. It seemed feeble now that the Reapers were there though. Sovereign had wiped out a large part of the third fleet when they'd gone to rescue the Destiny Ascension, and that had just been one ship and a few geth. What could six do? Or more? Liara had said there would be more.

"What do we do about the quarians?" she asked, to keep from falling into the despair that threatened to overtake her at what Liara had shown her so long ago.

"I...I do not know. With the Reapers here we can't let them go to war. It was devastating. But...," she trailed off. The Reaper upgrades had been what allowed the geth to finally achieve full self-awareness, full individuality, full intelligence, but at what cost? The quarians had lost over a third of their population, the geth had lost millions of processes.

She didn't know if it was possible for the geth to achieve the same level of consciousness without the Reapers, or if it was possible to get the upgrades from a dead Reaper, but to deny them that evolution seemed cruel to her.

She hadn't known many geth. She'd spoken to Legion a few times while he'd been on board while they helped with the conflict, and she'd known one or two other geth on Earth, but they'd all been shut down just days after she'd spoken to them the first time. She hadn't _known_ any of them. That was hardly reason to deny it to them though. She didn't know any batarians either, but she had risked...something...the very fabric of time, perhaps, in an attempt to save them. She looked up at the map spread out on her monitors. It looked like she would fail at that, though.

"But what?" Shepard prompted.

"Nothing. It's not important."

"Liara, what is it. If it can help, don't hold it back now."

She nodded slowly, and told her.

When she was done, Shepard walked over to the window and stared out at the stars. It was a lot to take in.

"Do you have any of the technical information on those upgrades?" she asked finally.

"No. I'm sorry."

Shepard shook her head, but didn't speak. She felt overloaded with information. She knew what she had to do though, and she wondered what it said about her that she was looking forward to it.

She turned, wrapping Liara in her arms. Liara relaxed into her embrace. It seemed like so long ago that she had been walking into Shepard's cell, still reeling from what had happened. In the last few weeks she had come to terms with everything that had happened, had fallen into a simple pattern. It had been days since she'd thought about just _going home._ She had slowly become to accept that this was home, with Shepard alive, and the Reapers coming again, and certain death knocking down her door. She'd been complacent. She should have pushed harder to get the crucible finished early, should have pushed herself and Shepard to figuring out the riddle on the memory shard.

Wishing wasn't going to change anything though. It wasn't going help anyone for her to want to go back _again._ She'd been given this chance, and she would take it.

"It's okay." Shepard pressed a kiss against her temple, and Liara lifted her chin to capture the spectre's lips with her own.

"I know," she said, once the kiss was broken, "I'm going to try to reach Hackett again."

"That's my girl," Shepard said. "I'm going to see what I can do about the quarians."

Shepard laughed when, just before the door to the elevators opened, Liara joined her.

"I'll try and reach him on the QEC," Liara said in explanation, "I'm still not having any luck with the regular comm channels."

The quarians stood as one when they reentered the small conference room. Liara rushed on without stopping, and Tali started to follow her before Shepard stopped her.

"Is everything all right, Shepard-Commander?" Legion asked, as she gathered the geth and quarians together around the table.

Shepard looked around at the assembled group. Liara had said that solving the geth conflict with the quarians had given the people hope that they would destroy the Reapers. They had – she had – but not completely. Hope, however, was always something in short supply.

"The Reapers have been seen in Batarian space. The Normandy is needed back at the Citadel."

"And what about these talks?" Xen asked, sounding a little smug and fairly annoyed, "You drag us all here for two weeks, and yet we have made no progress. I for one will not host the geth aboard my ship." There was a general murmur of assent from Gerrel and Koris. "So, we have just wasted our time."

"No," Shepard said firmly, "No" she said again, softer, "Tali will be taking my place, assuming the geth are agreeable to a quarian mediator," she glanced at Legion who tilted his head in assent, "and, again, with permission, the talks will be continued on Rannoch."

She had gotten the idea from Liara's tale moments before. What better place for the quarians to realize what they would gain from peace with the geth than on their home planet, and she didn't think the geth would have a problem with it.

"Out of the question," Gerrel snarled, "Tali is much too young be involved in this. And she's already been tried once for bringing geth into the fleet."

"A charge she was cleared of," Raan interrupted.

"Regardless! We were never given evidence that she was not a geth sympathizer! And if these machines are so ready to accept her, they must know she will be easily swayed!"

"My first duty is to the fleet," Tali yelled, slamming her hands on the table. Her eyes flashed under her helmet.

Shepard held up her hands. "Tali knows Legion, yes. But, I am sure she will be able to find a proper balance that will allow both the geth and the quarians to live together harmoniously. The Reapers are here. We can't have this petty bickering anymore!"

"It is hardly petty," Xen said coldly.

"Just be ready to fight if the time comes," Shepard growled. She glanced between the geth and the quarians, eyes lingering on Xen and Gerrel, "All of you."

* * *

It hadn't been as simple as putting her foot down, much as she would have liked it to have been. First, preparations had to be made to get everyone to Rannoch, and then Tali had taken her aside and begged her to find someone else to mediate. She'd hated to put Tali in that position when she clearly didn't want it, but in the end she had squared her shoulders and gone to face the admirals. Shepard had been rather proud of the way she handled herself in their presence, the more so when she got them to do what she wanted in less than an hour.

As the fleet pulled away from the Normandy long hours after Liara had first brought her news of the Reaper's arrival, Shepard stood at the galaxy map. The course was set for their return to the Citadel, and they were just waiting for the all clear from the fleet for them to enter FTL and head for the relay. She played through her plan in her head again. And again.

And again.

There was just so much that could go wrong. Not the least of which was, if the crucible wasn't done yet everything was moot. Liara still hadn't reached Hackett, and that wasn't terribly surprising, but their time was short and it made her anxious. The Alliance had yet to fill the empty councilor's seat, the three remaining councilors were still waiting on C-sec's final report before ruling on Udina's death, and on top of it all, Shepard felt like she hadn't slept in weeks.

She pinched the bridge of her nose and leaned against the railings.

"Shepard?"

She turned, and saw Liara moving from the door to the comm room. She smiled at her, a small ray of sunshine in an otherwise bleak afternoon. "Hey. Any word?"

Liara nodded and came over, leaning against the railing at the bottom on the ramp.

"It's not done. They're close, and they will finish building the crucible while on the move. I just hope...I just hope nothing will go wrong. It will take about two days to get to the Citadel."

"And the fleets?" Shepard asked, stepping down to join her.

"They can't spare anyone to help the batarians, but all ships on the border are being told to accept all refugees. I just hope...I can't imagine...if I've done something...," her breath hitched, wondering if coming back hadn't fixed anything. They hadn't been able to find out what they needed to do in the council tower. They hadn't prevented the Reapers return. They hadn't even been able to achieve peace between the quarians and the geth. Though she knew, intellectually, that it wasn't her fault; that she had been preparing for this day since she'd landed on Mars the second time – no, she had to include the time before that, all the time since she watched her mother die – emotionally she still laid it all at her own feet. She'd been given a second chance and had accomplished nothing with it.

Shepard wrapped an arm around her shoulders, drawing her close as they stood just to the right of the elevator. "You've done everything you can and more, Liara. Now we just have to see it through to the end."

"Of course, Shepard. You are right, I just...," she looked around the CIC and dropped her voice, "I miss her, and everything I've done...I'm never going to see her again."

Shepard didn't have to ask who she was talking about. She had never, and likely would never, meet their daughter and while that thought hurt, she could not even imagine what Liara was going through. She couldn't begin to consider how to comfort her. To a lose a child in a such a way – to have her never exist in the first place – it was too much to comprehend. She refused to offer false promises and platitudes, no matter how much she wanted to. Instead, she simply drew Liara into a hug.

"We'll kill the bastards," she whispered against Liara's crest, knowing that at least was true until her dying breath.

Liara smiled, nodding against Shepard's chest. She was suddenly aware of the eyes on them and pulled away.

"Thank you, Shepard. I... I will be in my office."

"Shepard, we are on our way to the Relay. ETA to the Citadel five hours 22 minutes," Joker's voice cut through the CIC. From the corner of her eye, Shepard saw a few of the crew jump at the sound, turning their heads away from staring - blatantly had either she or Liara been paying attention – at the couple.

"Thank you Joker." Shepard let her hand trail along Liara's arm as the asari moved toward the elevator, grabbing her hand and giving it a gentle, reassuring squeeze before returning to the galaxy map. "Alright people, show's over. Back to work!"

There were a few guilty chuckles, mostly from the humans, and a general rustling as they all went back to their posts. Shepard shook her head, glad, though mildly exasperated, that the crew could get a bit of amusement out of her giving her girlfriend a hug. That sort of thing would have to stop if Liara's plans didn't work though. It wouldn't be fair to the crew for them to be hanging off each other while the ship fought off Reapers. Liara had told her she'd done the same thing before and at the time Shepard hadn't understood, not completely. But now that the Reapers were breathing down their necks again she could see why she would do such a thing. It wasn't morale, which was Liara's reasoning, but rather just simple courtesy. The crew might find it amusing that their leader fawned all over the resident asari scientist (admittedly, there were four of them on the ship currently, but that was beside the point), but when they needed to focus on just staying alive, they might not find it so encouraging.

She sighed, hoping it wouldn't come to that. Liara had finally stopped stiffening up when she touched her in public, and she'd hate to make her insecure again.

There were days when she wished she'd listened to her heart months ago when she'd seen Liara again on Illium. Days when she wished she'd been able to throw down the mantle of responsibility she hadn't asked for that had been placed upon her shoulders, and had simply _loved._ Her life wasn't that easy though, there was too much at stake, and right now it was staring her in the eyes and according to Liara would be threatening Earth – a place she had never really considered home, but was if only by virtue of her species. There was hope though, and it was rushing towards them.

She shook her head. It was time to stop worrying of what might happen, of what could happen, and put her effort in what she wanted to happen. She'd seen what failure would cost, could see it every day in the lost expression Liara sometimes got when she thought no one was looking, and she wanted to wipe that look from her lover's face. She wanted to save Earth. And Palaven, which she'd seen on fire. Save Thessia. The crucible was almost finished, would be finished by the time it reached the citadel, and when Liara got up to the council chambers this would all be over.

It was a nice dream. And hopefully it would become a reality.

They had been a long time coming to this point, and the last stretch was always the hardest, but she had faith in her lover, in herself, in the crew around her.

She tightened her hands around the railing over the galaxy map, straightened her shoulders, and looked out over the only cross-species crew in the galaxy. If nothing else, if everything else failed, they had achieved this. It wasn't the collection of fleets Liara had told her about, but it felt good all the same.

"We're hitting the relay in 3...2...1..." Joker said over the comm, a few hours later, and despite the fact that they'd all been through relays a million times before, everyone braced themselves as the ship was slingshot through the stars.

Liara watched from her office window as they approached the relay, Glyph hovering just behind her.

"I have information coming in from your agent in the asari councilor's office, Shadow Broker," glyph said once they'd been shot out the other end. The Citadel was far enough away from the relay that even had her window been facing the right way she wouldn't have been able to make it out in the sky. She turned to Glyph's control terminal and attempted, again, to reset his parameters again. She'd spent so little time in this room recently that she hadn't even considered that she hadn't fixed Glyph's little problem with calling everyone 'Shadow Broker'.

She adjust the settings, hoping she got it right this time, and turned to the VI's interface. "What has she found, Glyph?"

"The reports currently coming in are that the councilors have dropped all charges against Lieutenant Commander Williams and Spectre Shepard. They will be requesting an audience with them both once the ship docks."

"Thank you, Glyph. It's about time. Anything from the quarian fleet?"

"Negative, Shadow Broker." Liara sighed and adjusted his settings again. "Negative, Dr. T'Soni," Glyph repeated, "though your ships have reported that they continue to follow them into geth controlled space."

"I suppose that is better than nothing," she muttered, turning to the rest of her feeds.

She doubted that the geth and the quarians would ever achieve anything remotely worthwhile without Shepard there, and she'd known that when she had told her of the incoming Reapers, but she'd had no choice. She could only hope that Tali would be able to find a common ground between her people and the geth. She didn't hold out hope for it, but maybe, when they were finished, they could go to Rannoch, and Shepard could pick up where she left off. Not that Shepard would want to – she'd spent the last two weeks frustrated and angry because of what she saw as lack of progress.

She flipped through the files quickly, barely looking at any of them. She'd go with Shepard. She hadn't planned on it originally, but after Tali's suggestion that she go herself she saw no reason to not join Shepard. Two pairs of eyes were better than one, always. She found the report Glyph had mentioned, and scanned the accompanying files. All charges were dropped, and the incident probably wouldn't even end up in Williams' file. She marked Ashley's file, just in case, with notes to make sure that nothing happened to the Lieutenant-Commander because of the councilor's death.

She dug deeper, trying to keep her mind off the images on the screens behind her. The Reapers had been moving out slowly, and the reports were coming in sporadically enough that chances were that no more than the six originally seen had entered the Milky Way. It wouldn't be long before the rest of their forces arrived. Most of their forces arrived. They had left some in reserve, apparently, and it was those that Liara needed to think about. They were the reason she had come back here. Not Shepard. Not the original invasion. She was here for those that were going to come because the pulse from the crucible the first time hadn't been complete, and the galaxy was still in danger.

She scanned through some more files, finding the latest reports from Feron. Cerberus had been rebuffed. With the death of the Illusive Man, and Aria's overtaking the Cerberus information and supply lines, reinforcements had never arrived on Eden Prime. She drummed her fingers on the table, considering whether or not to ask Aria for help with the extraction of Javik.

The reports of Aria's take over of Cerberus had been coming in over her network since they'd left Cronos station. It hadn't filtered to the news agencies yet, and she had a feeling Aria would keep it out of the press and away from the knowledge of the council for as long as possible. After taking Cronos, Aria had used information she'd gathered there to take another half dozen other smaller Cerberus outposts. Rumors, not yet confirmed by any of her agents, had the Cerberus troops committing suicide when they discovered who would now be in charge of them. Liara found that rather sickening, but the same rumors had Aria treating those that surrendered well enough considering her reputation.

Shepard had asked her to keep track of Aria's casualty lists through all of this, and she knew the spectre was looking for Teiron's name when she asked to see them. Thoughts of Teiron, and Shepard's apparent obsession with making sure that she stayed alive, immediately led her to thoughts of her own shortcomings.

She had long considered that her condition was mental, that she was simply unable to let go of the woman she felt she didn't deserve but who loved her all the same. It was the answer that was most logical. After Shepard had died during the war, she had never attempted to find another lover, first because of Illira, but later it had been simply fear. Teiron still held a place in her heart, it was eclipsed by the love she felt for Shepard, but it was there, and she didn't want to to tear her heart apart any further by putting herself through that kind of pain again. She may have accepted that Shepard would not come back, but she had been afraid to risk opening herself up again.

She stood up, frustrated at her thoughts, at thinking about her personal problems when the galaxy was now at risk, sooner than she had expected. She paced, the need to move overwhelming her. She didn't have time to worry about herself. She was healthy enough, and she wasn't here to try and change her own biology. She glanced back at the terminal. She couldn't let her personal life – not that Teiron was part of her personal life anymore, she told herself – interfere with the work that needed to be done to save the galaxy.

She wrote the message and sent it without over thinking it. Either Aria would send help to Eden Prime or she wouldn't, and in the end it wouldn't matter. Everything would be over in a few hours anyway. One way or the other, her attempts to make the future better would either succeed or not. She sent a silent prayer to Athame that it would, and then felt foolish for it. She hadn't prayed since Shepard had died the first time, and doing it now made her feel absurd. Long dead Protheans weren't going to help her now, and it had been Miranda - and the Illusive Man's funds - that had helped her before.

She knew she'd never get any work done now, not with her mind in such turmoil. She walked into the mess and made herself a cup of tea, sinking into one of the metal chairs and just breathing in the steam. The tea Shepard kept on board wasn't the same that her mother had given her as a child, nor the flowery Earl Grey she'd been kept around after Illira was born. In comparison with those, this was almost flavorless, but it was warm.

She tried to force her mind to thoughts of the riddle Shepard had been posed. Shepard had thought she'd solved it. The keepers, she'd said, were the key, as well as something she'd apparently heard on the Citadel before Liara had joined her team all those years ago. The very walls within the station could move, Shepard had told her, and the keepers would move furniture in private offices at random times. Knowing the Keepers were originally designed to activate the relay to dark space, and that the Protheans had stopped the signal and overwritten their programing, Shepard had a feeling that within the tower there must be a terminal to control the Keepers, and direct them. And if she could direct them, she could set the ratio of the wards and the presidium to that ideal, phi.

That was her hope, anyway, and Liara agreed that it seemed reasonable. The information EDI had given them, while not confirming their theory, supported it in a general sort of way. Why Shepard would have been so cryptic about it in the shard, though, she didn't understand. Maybe, had they found the remains of the tower after the Citadel had fallen apart and weren't dealing with one that was intact, Shepard's statement would make more sense. They would work with what they had, though, play the cards they were dealt to use the human phrase.

Other thoughts kept interfering though. Thoughts of her father, her mother, Illira. She pulled up the information Illira had given her along with Nillya's ultrasound on her Omni-Tool, sipping the still-hot tea. In the collection of files about the crucible she found Illira's thesis. On a whim, mostly to keep her mind from wandering again, she read it.

And then she read it again.

She was reading through it a third time when Shepard interrupted her.

"Hey, you. We're pulling up to the docks. You ready?"

"Shepard! Read this!" She shoved her arm out, almost clipping the human on the nose. Shepard laughed, tapped a few buttons on Liara's Omni-tool to transfer the files to hers, and brought it up. She skimmed it, feeling a rush of pride for her daughter, but couldn't figure out why Liara thought it so important that she would almost punch her. She'd mentioned that Illira had included this file with everything that had been sent back, but like everything else it had been sent on to the crucible teams without either of them really paying it much attention.

"O-kay," Shepard drew out, raising an eyebrow at Liara and smirking, "She obviously got her mother's brains, but what does this have to do with you getting Councilor Tevos to let you into their secret batcave?"

"Batcave? Nevermind. Charges have been dropped, by the way. And actually read it. She found an inverse correlation between the size of a mass effect field and the amount of energy needed to create one that is larger," Liara said, pointing over Shepard's shoulder at the corresponding passage on the open document on the human's arm.

Shepard reread it again, "So...the power output to create a mass effect field the size of one in a relay..."

"...would be proportionately smaller than the one used to generate our FTL speeds compared to one used for say...Traynor's toothbrush," Liara finished for her.

"Traynor's toothbrush?"

"Don't ask," Liara chuckled, smiling. "Do you think this might have something to do with what you meant?"

"It's...possible."

"Let's go find out. And I'm going to have to apologize to Illira for not reading this when she gave it to me the first time. It was still sitting on my desk, two hundred years later. I think I lost it on the last move." She sighed. She had meant to read it, she really had, but she'd never really understood Illira's interest in mass effect fields. Neither had the girl's professors, for that matter. Illira had almost not received her degree, and she'd never gotten around to going back for her Masters. Liara wondered at an entire galaxy never bothering to consider where their technology came from, of never trying to determine the science behind it, and then still dismissing those who did. Even after finding out it had been Reaper tech to begin with.

People had even, for a while, salvaged bits of tech from dead Reapers, once it was determined the threat of indoctrination was gone. But they had simply used it, never trying to find out how it worked. She had questioned this behavior in her youth as well, long before she'd ever known that Reapers existed, but had still considered her daughter's fascination with it strange.

Shepard followed her back up to the CIC. She went through Illira's paper again, trying to piece together exactly how she could use the information in there. If she could create a field large enough that the ratio of its power usage to that of the one created to reach dark space and if that ratio was the same as the latter's energy output to the sum of it and the former...it could do something, she supposed. It could also just blow up the entire Citadel, without a convenient planet to land on.

She let the Omni-Tool flicker out when she heard the docking clamps connect.

"Right," she said, staring at the airlock door, "contact me when you get up there, and I'll try and walk you through-"

"And you're not coming because...?" Liara asked.

"I take it you forget the council doesn't want me wandering around," Shepard chuckle.

"I really wish you'd listen to me," Liara said, kissing her cheek with a laugh. "They dropped charges, I told you that."

"You did? They did?" Shepard grinned, embarrassed. "I knew that. Let's go then."

"Yes, ma'am," Liara laughed, and followed her into the airlock.

The meeting with the councilors was uneventful, though Liara was certain she saw Tevos give her a slight, disappointed shake of her head. She didn't care what the elder asari thought, though. As the shadow broker she could tear all the councilors down, make them beg on their knees if she wanted. If Tevos thought the shy, unassuming daughter of Benezia was still anywhere to be found, she was wrong. She knew that Tevos probably saw her as a puppet dancing on Shepard's strings, but she gave them permission to enter the chambers at the top of the tower, and Liara couldn't care less about her personal feelings on the matter.

Shepard took Liara's hand, and squeezed it gently as they walked toward the door at the end of the long corridor at the top of the Citadel tower.

"Here goes nothing," she said, laughing softly.

"It will work, Shepard. It has to."

Liara reached out, and the door opened. An array of terminals lined the walls, and a large circular table dominated the center of the room. A dry bar was tucked into one corner, and a series of monitors were silently playing various news broadcasts from all the citadel races.

A keeper was working beneath the screens. It paused when they came in, then turned back to what it was working on.

They had made it.


	19. Chapter 19

Hackett paced the deck of his ship, staring down at the dozen or so messages he had received from Dr. T'Soni. He'd already talked to her, and the crucible, as she called it, was currently making its slow way toward the Citadel behind him. She had been persistent, he had to give her that. There was a rising panic in each of the messages, which was why he'd finally taken one of her calls. Parliament was breathing down his neck because of this project, something about colonial and global security, and while, yes, there were ex-Cerberus agents working on the project, as well as a fairly large contingent of aliens, none of it, in his eyes, seemed like a security risk.

No one even knew what the machine did, let alone how to use it.

Still, it was never a smart career move to be seen to be working against those in power, and unfortunately, with Shepard's stunt a few months back, speaking with anyone aboard the Normandy was now seen as "working against" the Alliance. Had she contacted him as the Shadow Broker it might have been easier, but even then, he'd been censured for speaking to 'him' to.

They were eighteen hours out from the Citadel. T'Soni had said the Reapers had arrived but it hadn't been until an hour before that the Alliance had anything even close to proof. Parliament was still waffling about the whole thing, of course, but an Alliance scout ship had seen them. Hundreds of them, thousands of them, pouring over the outer rim. Of the images he had seen, perhaps one in a two hundred was as large as the ship they had taken down a few years before, but their _numbers._ T'Soni had said six. The images they had were of a lot more that six.

He sat down in the captains chair and stared out at the stars moving in front of him. The fifth, and what remained of the third, on all sides.

He prayed the Shadow Broker was right.

* * *

Shish patted his nephew on the head, and sent him outside to play. The tiny planet his sister and her family lived on was deep inside the heart of the Hegemony, a small safe haven in a galaxy that couldn't stand to look on his people. He watched the boy run outside, joining up with a couple of other children that lived in the area, probably off to play a sandlot game of skyball, and thought of his daughter. He shouldn't have left her. Had he stayed with her...

But that human would have killed all of them then. Shepard. Just thinking her name made him shudder in revulsion. And then, when he'd had her cornered on the Citadel they'd been over powered, and for reasons he couldn't comprehend now he'd let her walk away. Of course, she'd gone and put a hole in the human councilor's head, and he'd been able to get away from C-Sec, he supposed he should thank her for that.

He wouldn't.

He'd stowed away on the first freighter out of the Citadel after running from the C-Sec officers. It had taken another half dozen transfers, which he'd actually paid for transport on, to get back to the Hegemony. He'd come back to the only family he had left.

His sister brought him a bowl filled with her amazing stew, and he took it gratefully. He hadn't had a traditional batarian stew in years, and his sister's rivaled their mother's. He stood at the door, watching the boys play in the yard, chewing thoughtfully.

Shepard had lied. Humans always lied.

There were no-

The sky suddenly darkened. There was screaming in the distance, and he watched as the boys stopped playing and stared up at the rolling clouds that had just appeared. He followed their gaze and the deep rolling clouds parted. The sky turned red, and a beam of light cut through the city center a few miles away. The blast rocked the ground, the street in front of the house cracked and Shish was knocked to the floor.

The bowl in his hand broke as it fell to the floor, the thick brown stew oozing across the carpet of his sister's home.

His heart beat in his throat, and his four eyes looked in four separate directions. The roof of the house had collapsed, and he could hear his sister screaming for her son on the far side of the debris. People were running in the street, and the bright red beam was cutting through the air as a large, ugly ship landed some distance away. It was on the far side of town, but so large its shadow covered the once-quiet street his sister lived on.

The boys had scattered, his nephew was no where to be seen. He glanced back at the debris that was trapping his sister in her home then rushed out into the street to find the child.

It had to be the humans.

Those goddamned, upstart, idiot...

The thoughts died away when he saw the creatures swarming down the street. They looked vaguely human, but with all the tubes and wires they could just have easily have once been asari. Or even batarian, he supposed, they were so misshapen. No, they had definitely once been human.

He tried to duck behind a house, but they were on him too quick.

As he went under their combined weight, he saw another ship land. And another.

And another.

He couldn't hear anything above the loud, rumbling whine the ships made as they shot their red beams and killed everyone in sight.

His last thought, before the creatures began to tear at his limbs, was that Shepard had been right.

By the Creator, Shepard had been right.

* * *

Amelia Snyder threw the data pad she'd been handed by the scared looking ensign across the room.

Lies.

It was all lies.

Hackett was escorting that credit eater of a project toward the Citadel on Shepard's orders. Hackett. An Alliance admiral. Taking orders from a a disgraced, mentally-unstable criminal. She just wished there was something she could do about it. All his reports said he was doing it on his own initiative based on the information he'd received from that asari doctor.

Taking advice from someone like the Matriarch Benezia's daughter was not, apparently, a bad thing. At least according to Parliament

She dismissed the ensign with a wave of her hand. Hackett's desire to take this new pet project of his to the Citadel was draining resources at an alarming rate. And he didn't seem to care. Of course he didn't. He was a stuck up, annoying, upstart, skinny little man. At least that's how she remembered him. Never mind that he had become somewhat capable. Very capable.

No. She remembered the annoying, pimply young man that had sat beside her on the transport that first day with the Alliance.

She remembered they had discussed the likelihood of intelligent extraterrestrials. Whether the people who had left the archive on Mars that had been discovered three years before were still out there somewhere. He had fervently believed that they were alone in the universe. Five years later, he'd be proven wrong. Violently.

He'd be proven wrong again when this whole thing blew up in his face.

She didn't care what the data pad said. Whatever was attacking the batarians was probably some new geth trick. She wanted evidence. She wanted proof.

Bring her a dead Reaper and she, and Parliament, and the rest of the Alliance would line up behind Shepard and apologize.

She grimaced. Maybe not apologize. She didn't do that well. But they might lift charges.

All of this yelling and screaming and debating about 'Reapers' wasn't anything more than a dirty smear of vocalization. She'd been doing everything she could to stop this poor joke on Hackett's part but he was the Alliance golden boy. It bothered her more than she would ever admit.

She'd loved him once. But that was a long time ago. He hadn't returned the sentiment, not that she'd ever told him.

The ensign had returned. She shot her best glare at the woman.

"You have a private message, ma'am," the young woman said.

"Patch it through then," Snyder said with a groan.

Hannah Shepard appeared on the small screen on her desk.

"Hannah! How are you?" This at least, was a pleasant surprise. Hannah was only a year younger than she and Hackett, and after the horrible loss of her husband Hannah and Snyder had had a short stint together on a small ship in the home cluster. Amelia could remember the four year old Shepard, wide-eyed and scared. She hadn't liked her then, either.

"Have you heard? My daughter...she was right! They're...they're here!" Hannah's voice was panicked, sitting an octave above where it normally was.

"You're reading much too much into these reports, Hannah. I'm sure it's nothing. It could just as easily be the batarians looking for a little limelight."

"No," Hannah insisted, "she was...the last time I saw her. And that damned asari...this is all her fault. My baby's going to die, isn't she Ami? That's what this is leading up to? They're here for her because she saw them coming."

"Relax, Hannah. Nothing is going to happen to your daughter. At least unless she's dumb enough to go wandering into Alliance controlled space. Although, I do have a word or two I want to have with you about you working with Hackett. This project of his is taxing us. I don't think you want to be seen getting too friendly with Admiral Hackett, if you know what I mean."

"I don't give a damn about your squabbles with him, Ami. I really don't. I need you to find my daughter. I need you to make sure she's okay. We have to stop these...things."

Snyder sighed, "Relax. Really. It'll be fine. Look, I've got to tour the First next week. Hackett apparently wants them on guard duty or something on the relay. I think it's a waste of time, but you know how it is. The politicians say jump, and we all ask how high, right? Come with me. Bring the Orizaba around, I'm sure it's due for a refit anyway."

"I'll think about it. I haven't been able to reach her."

"I'm sure she's fine. Stop worrying about it." She wanted to add, "And she got herself into this mess herself, anyway," but didn't think that would go over well with the kids mother.

"You're right. Of course you are."

"I always am, Captain. Get some sleep. That's an order."

Hannah laughed, but her smile didn't reach her eyes. She was looking haggard. With a daughter like that, Snyder couldn't really say she'd be any better off. Kid was just like her damn dad.

The direct line to parliament beeped. She brought them up on the screen Hannah had recently vacated.

"The Hegemony is floundering. They're making a direct path for Earth. Its...It has to be Reapers."

That would never go into the official statements. But to hear the head of the Alliance say such a thing made Snyder's blood run cold.

She hated when she was wrong.

* * *

Aria read over the message from that T'Soni girl again and laughed. The file had been encrypted, and had contained enough junk data that she'd have to completely wipe her omni-tool data to get rid of it in all probability. It was kinda cute that Benezia's kid thought she was so kick ass.

True, the girl had gotten quite a bit better at the whole I'm-going-to-kill-you-and-not-blink-an-eye thing since the last time she'd been here, but underneath it all was still that pudgy little child that had clung to her mother's skirts. Aria hated being reminded of the day she'd met the esteemed Matriarch Benezia. Almost ended up dead. Worst day of her life. Ever. The kid had been cute though, and she'd owed the kids dad a favor or six by that time.

"Keep an eye on her, would you T'Loak?" Aethyta had said, so drunk she'd been unable to sit straight. "I mean, Nezzy and me, we're not so good anymore. But that kid...the kids going places. She's gonna go places, mom like hers. I get the holos, sure, but just in case...anything happens to Nezzy or me, you keep an eye on her, alright? 'Cause we got to stick together, you and me. Bad asses of the galaxy."

And Aria had been more than a little drunk herself – the first, and only, time that had happened while she was on Omega – and Aethyta had been a good friend for a long time; since they'd both been maidens. And she had owned her a few favors. So she'd said yes. Figured it would make up for not having gone to Aethyta's bonding ceremony with Benezia, too. Stupid thing on both their parts, in Aria's opinion. But she'd said yes, so when the girl had shown up, eyes puffy from lack of sleep and too many tears, she hadn't killed her. Of course, she also hadn't told her that her dad had just been by there and was looking for her either, but that hadn't been part of her promise.

And now she was playing at Broker.

It had taken Aria longer than she'd ever admit to figure that one out. She'd had a sort of unspoken truce with the previous incarnation of the Broker, and had known its predecessor personally, probably the only person alive who had. She'd known the minute the power had shifted again, and had suspected for some time that Liara's little drell friend had taken up the mantle. That would have made more sense, really, than the archeologist trying to play empress of evil. It hadn't been until that little tidbit the month before about Cerberus that she'd finally caught on.

The drell wouldn't have cared. But Liara had an interest in Cerberus, what with her little plaything Commander Shepard having once been their little puppet. She'd considered, more than once, informing the dear doctor that her secret was out. That would, however, have broken her promise. And Aethyta was most likely the only person in the galaxy that could take her down.

She waved the nearest dancer over. It was that spy from Thessia. Well into the middle of her maiden years, and not quite beautiful, the woman had been mainly a piss poor guard over her adult life, but she had a decent body and had been a quick learner. And, if rumors from the Cronos mission were true, the woman had a history with either T'Soni or Shepard.

Probably Shepard. That woman's obsession with Aria's people was almost disgusting. T'Soni had thankfully tempered some of that, at least.

"Teiron, grab Seule and Luielle. You're going to Eden Prime. We've got cargo waiting for us there. You'll want to talk to a drell, F-something. Feron. Take a handful of the human boys in case the locals get angry."

Aria swatted her on the ass as she turned to obey, and grinned when she didn't even react. She was a horrible spy, really. Maybe she should do Liara a favor and remove the competition; being owed one by the Shadow Broker was nice; being owed two was a party.

Later.

Now, she needed to find out if the rumors about the Hegemony were true. And find the best way to exploit it if it was.

* * *

Aethyta wiped the counter down, smearing the slightly sticky substance on it more than really cleaning it.

Liara was on the Citadel. She'd seen the girl rush by her, flanked by Shepard and another human woman hours before. They'd been headed for the tower, or so rumors said, and she hadn't seen them leave. Well, she hadn't seen her daughter leave. The other human had come by, had a drink, then moved on. Hadn't said much in the way of anything. Certainly nothing useful.

She'd had to go home, eventually. That had been the worst bit. She didn't know now whether Liara had left. Didn't know what her daughter had been doing up there.

And if there was one thing Aethyta disliked more than anything else, it was not knowing.

She glanced down at the bar and saw the smear she'd left wiping the dry rag across the semi-dried alcohol. She stared at it a moment, mind still trying to logic out what Liara and Shepard could be up to with the council that they had been up there for hours. Might still be up there, almost a day later. Eventually, the knowledge that she needed to get something a bit stronger to clean up the mess reached her brain, and she found the spray bottle and cleaned it up properly.

Nothing terribly exciting seemed to be going on, at least as far as the citadel rumor mill was concerned. Other than no charges being brought on the human councilor's shooting, but that was old news now. Currently, the most exciting thing going on was that one of the asari actresses in the most recent Blasto film had been knocked up by Blasto himself. Stupid girl. She'd regret it. Hanar babies were the hardest. She knew from experience. Her eldest, whose father had been an almost portly Salarian, had been a fairly easy birth. In comparison, her younger daughter had left her screaming for hours. Damn kid hadn't wanted to come out. Had seemed to resent that she'd had to all through her Maiden years too.

She hadn't seen either of them in a few years now, or either of her granddaughters.

That was reason enough to keep an eye on her youngest, even if she wasn't the girl's mother. Nezzy wasn't around to take care of her, so she'd have to. And she wouldn't make the same mistakes she had with her own, not after Liara had come and found her. It warmed her old, cold heart just thinking about it.

Kid's mother would've kick her ass if she'd found out she'd told the kid that story, though. She didn't really know why she had either. Not like there was anything Liara could do about it now. Her name was her name, and her lineage was her lineage, no matter what she wanted. Last of the T'Sonis, poor kid. Benezia's sister had apparently had a couple of kids, but all three of them had been lost in a transport explosion when Benezia had still been sucking on her moms teat. T'Soni's never did anything normal, in Aethyta's opinion. Benezia had been just a couple of years from entering her Matriarch stage – all the signs had been there – when she'd come home one day and and the woman had practically assaulted her. Two years later, they were no longer together, and Aethyta had a handful of pictures of the newborn. Benezia's mother, on the other hand, had had a daughter at barely two hundred and fifty, and hadn't had Benezia for another four hundred. Crazy. Aethyta had only waited ten years between her two, the two she'd given birth to anyway. She'd wanted them closer together, no point in just getting out of diapers to end up neck deep in them again, but her first had been a bit of a handful. If nothing on her sister.

And then there was Liara.

Hadn't taken a lover until a hundred and six. She'd apparently shacked up with that kid on Illium, but nothing had come of it. Kid...she'd had a century on Liara at least. She'd spent a lot of time crying at the bar once they'd apparently gotten together. Aethyta could guess why. Her kid just didn't know how to move on. Got all wrapped up in Shepard. Was still drinking the same crap ass booze Earth churned out months after the woman had abandoned her. Or died. Or whatever the fuck had happened.

T'Sonis were all mad. That's all there was to it.

Still, Liara was her daughter. She had a responsibility to her. And that meant finding out what the hell she was up to.

She marched around the side of the bar, barely giving the manager a cursory nod to tell him she was leaving and marched herself across the bridge toward the tower elevator.

She didn't know the asari councilor. She made it a personal mission to not get to know politicians. That had backfired with Benezia, but she'd kept to it all the same. She was too old now to go changing her ways. Still, her name carried some weight, and she'd technically still been married to Benezia when she'd gone rouge – Benezia had never filed the paperwork – which meant her name also carried the weight of the T'Soni name, since they had a daughter together. And that meant she should be able to march right up there and find out what they were doing to her little girl.

And never mind that her baby girl was a rather powerful information broker on Illium that was sharing a bed with the Alliance's most wanted. She was still her baby girl.

The elevator took so long she almost wished there were stairs just so she could keep moving. She paced the cramped space, and moved all the faster when she was out the other side.

Only to be stopped by C-Sec.

In the gardens.

The public gardens.

No one was allowed in, they told her. Even after she told them who she was. Even when she demanded to see the asari councilor. They assured her that both Shepard and Dr. T'Soni were fine, but were much too busy for visitors.

They offered to set her up a meeting with this Tevos character.

With an aggravated huff she turned on a heel and left. She would get to the bottom of this.

Her Omni-Tool beeped.

She read the incoming message from High Command.

Unidentified ships had been seen in the Hegemony.

She cursed silently, letting the tension drain from her body. She'd let the kid work. But when this was all over, she wanted some answers.

* * *

Harbinger was.

It sat in the void and saw. It did not like what it saw.

Before, it had felt the rift. The rift had changed. The flux of time shifted. It flowed. There had been a bubble. The bubble had grown. It did not like the bubble.

The bubble meant time distortion. Time distortion meant the organics had found the Box. It had hoped it had destroyed all copies of the Box. The Box was not a danger, but an inconvenience.

Harbinger did not like things that were an inconvenience.

Like Shepard.

It thought the bubble was probably caused by Shepard. The puny human had been bothering it for much too long. When the Shepard had destroyed Nazara Plans had been put in motion. It had sent the Collectors, pesky creatures that they were, to collect the organic. They had failed. The Other, the T'Soni, had prevented it from bringing Shepard under its control. But Shepard had walked right into its clutches. It had thought it had won. But the Shepard had killed the infant. The new Reaper. It had been most upset.

Now, this bubble had to be the work of the Shepard. Shepard was making its job very difficult. Chaos would reign if it did not stop the Shepard, if it did not stop the bubble.

When the organics, in the cycle before the last, had discovered the subtle shift that allowed them to travel in time, many of its fellow Reapers had thought that this was a new solution. That with the power of the Box they no longer had to harvest the galaxy to keep peace. That went against Harbinger's programing. The harvest had to continue. Peace had to be enforced.

The Box was dangerous. It caused the Reapers to think outside their programming. The bubble caused this. The bubble was gone now, and it had calmed its companions.

Those that been most vocal Before, and those that had spoken up when the felt the bubble, it had sent ahead. It saw through their sensors. It saw what was happening.

It saw the weapon.

They were low on reserves. They lacked fuel. The six were sent to gather those resources to allow the fleet to enter faster. They sped up the time table.

Reapers were by nature patient. It was, by nature, patient. Shepard made it lose its patience. It did not like that feeling. It did not like to be rushed. But it rushed. It pushed. It ran the thousands of ships with it as fast they could go. A few hundred true Reapers, tens of thousands of smaller ships under their control. He left none behind.

It was in its programing to leave a small force behind, to ensure the cycle would continue even if the weapon was completed.

It ignored the warning sirens when he disobeyed that program. It brought them all.

It would wipe them all out. It would not stop to make another Reaper. It would not bother to harvest. They were dead.

This cycle was dead.

Organics did not question its will. They fought, they always fought, but they never questioned. They never asked 'Why'. The Shepard asked why. The bubble asked why.

It did not like Shepard.

It really didn't like the bubble.

The echos of the bubble still buffeted it as it moved through dark space toward the shining light of the galaxy before it. They radiated out, would, in time, encompass the universe. The echoes were dangerous. The echoes could unravel all that it had worked for. The echoes spoke of death.

The fabric of time was wrong. It was broken. It was torn. It had been torn before, and the holes were there for those that were willing to look. It never bothered to look. It did not care so long as the tears, and the bubble, did not effect it. They would find the source. They would kill the source.

Shepard.

It had to be Shepard.

It hated Shepard.

With the full might of the Reapers, it entered the galaxy, his force splitting off to begin their attacks on other planets. They would be systematic.

It was not in their programming to be so. In previous cycles they moved out from the Relay, that which was called the Citadel now, and had simply followed the lines of organics to the most populated worlds.

This would be different.

This would be better. They would wipe out everything, so that no living soul existed on a planet before moving on to the next. They would finish off a solar system before moving on.

They would make sure there was nothing left but microbes.

They would have to wait longer for the next cycle, but it could not risk Shepard. What Shepard could do.

It was Harbinger.

It would be victorious.

* * *

"I already tried that," Shepard growled, slamming her hand down on the control panel. The echoing bang that resulted made Liara flinch, and she took a step back. She'd seen Shepard angry. She'd seen Shepard depressed. She'd seen Shepard writhing in agony. And in pleasure. She had never seen Shepard like this.

It wasn't just anger. This was something more, something that seemed to consume her. Something primal and fierce and terrifying. She couldn't put a name to it, though she could see terror and horror and desolation swirling in her lovers eyes.

"I'm sorry, Shepard. Perhaps we should take a moment?"

"Fine, whatever," Shepard snapped.

They had been at this for hours. There had been signs they were on the right track, but there had been no shower of sparks, no fanfare to announce they'd succeeded. Liara feared that it would take actually firing the Crucible to find out if anything they had tried would work, but Shepard was convinced there would be some evidence of change.

And there had been, at the beginning.

The keepers, for instance, had come up to the tower from all over the citadel it seemed. Reports were there were still a few stragglers around the presidium, but the wards were currently keeper free. And they had done what Shepard had commanded them. Bits of wall had been moved, the wards had even shifted slightly along the Presidium rim. They'd been able to create small mass effect fields just outside the environmental barriers. And then progressively larger ones. And then Shepard had tried her hand at attempting to make the one that she thought would save them all.

It had glowed brightly, but had remained unnoticed by anyone, it seemed, on the Citadel.

Shepard had sat at the table after that, and had plugged numbers into a data pad, trying to find out where she'd gone wrong.

After about an hour, she'd asked someone to fetch her a pencil. It had taken hours, during which Shepard had tried various other experiments with the controls, but they'd eventually found an old man with a store in one of the wards that had a stub of one. The little piece of wood and graphite was probably older than Liara, but Shepard had grinned madly, and had gone on to deface the councilor's table. With math. Lots of math. Liara couldn't even follow half of it, but while she'd prided herself for being fairly well versed in most things, but what Shepard had scibbled all over the wooden surface of the table had left her stumped.

Shepard had been just as confused, apparently; she'd gotten nowhere. Or so she'd said. Nothing was working. They were there. This was supposed to be the end, but nothing had happened.

Shepard had tried to call Tali, but had been unable to get through to the Veil. She'd tried to contact various professors on Earth, Palaven and Thessia, but though she reached a few of them, none had been any help.

So Liara had suggested, hoping just to calm her, that they try and use the keepers again.

Which had prompted the outburst. And what was probably going to be a rather expensive repair to the console table. Thankfully, Shepard didn't appear to have damaged the actual computer.

They both sank into chairs across from each other.

Shepard was refusing to look at her, and Liara didn't much mind.

It hadn't worked. That's what it came down to.

She had failed.


	20. Chapter 20

**Anon reviewer...I TOTALLY didn't see the "Shish kabob" thing 'till you pointed it out. Though now that I do, it's hilarious, and I'm totally going to claim it was on purpose from the beginning. Yes. Thank you :) **

** And...everyone, I'm sorry for the ending of this chapter. But it was too good to pass up ;-)**

Liara glanced over at Shepard again. The human woman was laying on her stomach on the hotel bed, spread eagle, snoring softly. They hadn't spoken in hours. Not since Liara had insisted they leave the tower and try and get some sleep. That had been about five hours ago. The crucible was maybe three hours out now, give or take. Her mind was fuzzy from lack of sleep, but she needed to keep working. She had to find out where they had gone wrong. She wanted nothing more than to fall into the bed with Shepard, curl up against her side and fall asleep, but she couldn't. She had to find the reason things weren't working, and she needed to find it now.

She didn't think Shepard would much want her company right now anyway. The stress and close quarters had degraded both of them to snapping, nitpicking, and in the end cold silence. It wasn't the first time they had fought, nor, if Liara had anything to say about it the last, but it was the first time neither had been willing to take the first steps to make it better. Usually they were stumbling over each other to say sorry, or were falling into each other to show how sorry they were at least. Today, Shepard had walked a few steps ahead of her, and Liara hadn't made any attempt to catch up.

It hurt, more than Liara would admit, though.

She didn't doubt that Shepard still loved her. She knew Shepard still loved her. It had only been a matter of time before the stress got to them. They'd been on edge for years, their whole relationship had been built up around destruction and death and the knowledge that they could both be dead in hours. These last few months had been the first time they had been together without the worry that tomorrow might be their last day together since Shepard had been resurrected. It had taken Liara three hundred years to get that again; she felt she should of known it couldn't last. Not while knowing that the Reapers were coming again. She just wished it hadn't happened now, when there was so much at stake and so little time.

Shepard groaned, rolling onto her side. She hadn't even bothered to strip more than her shoes, and her shirt bunched up as she curled up into a fetal position. Liara smiled, the sight draining some of her tension. She did love watching Shepard sleep. During the war Shepard hadn't slept nearly enough, and she'd rarely been around to see it when she did. She looked so much younger when she slept, all the horrors she had to deal with during the day flittering away to leave a serene mask. The one thing she wanted for Shepard, more than anything else, was for her to be able to wear this face during the day.

Her smile faded as she turned back to the data pad she was reviewing. She'd spoken with Councilor Tevos, not as Dr. T'Soni, archeologist, nor as T'Soni, Shadow Broker, but rather as Liara, Benezia's daughter. That, more than anything she thought, had been what had turned Shepard to stony silence. Tevos had been incredibly polite, had listened intently, and had begun work on setting up a temporary evacuation of the station once the crucible arrived. Liara had been surprised at how willing Tevos was to accept what she suggested, especially considering how stubborn her people had been during the war, but had thought the news would have cheered Shepard up a little. The councilors were listening, or at least one councilor was listening.

Rather than be excited that someone was listening though, Shepard had rolled her eyes, turned back to the terminal and had nearly fried the Citadel by making a mass effect field around the _entire_ station. Liara had done the only thing she could and told her to go to bed, she was getting dangerous.

Shepard had responded by sending Liara a rather rude human hand gesture. Liara had retaliated by locking her in a stasis field.

"What the fuck, Liara!" Shepard had snapped, trying valiantly, but unsuccessfully, to move.

"You need to go to bed! You've been at this for thirty-six hours! You could have killed everyone on the station if that had been unstable!"

"It wasn't," Shepard had sneered.

"That is not the point. You are too tired to be working on this. I have gotten us a room on the Presidium, you will use it."

"We don't have time, Liara. They're here. Now let me out of here."

It had taken another few minutes to convince the ever angrier Shepard to concede to go to the hotel. In the end, she'd simply stopped responding to Liara at all, but had stalked off in a huff when the stasis field had finally dropped.

Liara had been sitting in the side chair ever since, going over page after page of notes. Notes from EDI, Illira, the science teams working on the crucible. There was nothing more, though. Nothing to point them in the right direction.

On the other hand, she thought, there was no evidence that they hadn't already succeeded. They didn't know what Shepard had meant, what this riddle of hers had to do with anything, but it was clear all the hope they had been riding on for so long had turned out to be false. Still, it was entirely possible that they had already fixed the issue, and they wouldn't know it until the machine fired.

Liara set the data pad to the side, and lowered her head into her hands. She rubbed the heels of her hands into her eyes.

Coffee.

That's what she needed. It would keep her going for a few more hours, at least until the crucible arrived.

She stood, wincing at the the sound, more than the feeling, of her spine popping. She rolled her neck, biting back the sigh.

"Goddamn it, come to bed already," Shepard growled as she reached the door. Liara turned, but Shepard was still curled up on the bed, her eyes shut tightly.

"I am going to fetch some coffee. I won't be long."

"No coffee. Sleep."

"I'm okay, Shepard." She moved over to the side of the bed and pushed a loose strand of hair behind the human's ear. She didn't know why she loved doing that so much, why it made her feel so content, but even half asleep, it made Shepard smile.

"Good for the goose, Liara."

Liara had heard the human phrase before; it caused her to roll her eyes and kiss Shepard's forehead. "You go back to sleep. I'll only be a minute."

The weight of the galaxy rested upon this woman's shoulders, and the least she could do, Liara thought, was help her find the answer. And make sure she got her rest. Satisfied Shepard was asleep again, Liara slipped out of the room.

* * *

His first thought was that this had to be the end of the galaxy. That was the only reason why there was so much tension in the room; why Liara and Shepard were being so...polite. To an outside observer, perhaps, nothing would appear different. He, however, had known both of them long enough to pick up on the fact that they were currently having what his mother had always called 'a little lover's tiff'. It was little things, mainly, that he noticed. Shepard not 'accidentally' bumping into Liara when she walked by, Liara not giving Shepard that slow, almost sultry, smile every time she looked at her.

The fact that he didn't feel like a third wheel.

He did his best to ignore it. If they wanted to argue about what color to paint the mess hall when the Reapers were breathing down their necks he supposed that was their problem. As long as it didn't effect getting the job done they could have their silent fight all they wanted.

The worst part about the whole thing though, now that he thought about it, was that they both seemed to want to set things right. He'd catch, out of the corner of his eye, one staring at the other while the others back was turned. This in and of itself was not unusual. Shepard had done that to Liara nonstop back before the Normandy crashed. Even after it became completely obvious that Liara wasn't actually spending most nights in her cot behind the med bay Shepard would still just watch her. Never with that look of despair, though. Longing, yes. Confusion, occasionally. But never despair. And Liara had never been so blatant about the way she'd stare at Shepard. It wasn't rare, really, to find her doing so, but if she was caught she'd usually turn purple and scurry into a different room. She'd seen him looking at her once today, but had just turned her sad gaze on him.

He shook his head, clearing his thoughts.

He hadn't been called up here to bury himself in their love life. If they'd wanted that they'd have asked Ashley. Or James.

He snorted, thinking of James trying to deal with these two.

"Something funny, Vakarian?"

"Just found your problem, Shepard. You humans are just completely useless," he answered, adjusting a few numbers on the console.

"You what?" Liara squealed, sounding more like herself than she had since he'd come up here half an hour before.

"Found it. Right there," he stepped away, showing them the new calculations for the mass effect fields.

"What the hell did you do?" Shepard asked.

"State secret," he laughed. He might tell, eventually, but there were some things he liked to keep a mystery, and his handiness with machines, weapons in particular, was one of them. They'd have saved themselves quite a headache if they'd talked to him first.

"I have been messing with that damn thing for almost two days! I...I did that!" She was running through the changes he had made, trying to reverse engineer his solution.

"Maybe it just didn't like you?"

Shepard just shook her head. "It'll work?"

"How the hell should I know? I don't even know what the hell it's supposed to do. But, I solved that damn equation you gave me."

Liara was smiling widely, "Shepard, this has to be it. Just upload it into the main server."

Their eyes met for the first time, and things seemed to be okay for a moment.

"Yeah. Both of you, back to the Normandy. The evacuations are almost done, Hackett will be bringing the Crucible in to dock as soon as all ships are gone. I don't know what will happen, but I can't leave until I know it's worked."

And then the wrath of the Spirits came down upon her.

In the form of one small, blue Asari.

There was a lot of screaming, and he was fairly certain she was saying something, but he couldn't follow it. And for the first time ever – _ever_ – in the entire time he'd known her, Shepard looked scared.

"Don't you dare! After everything we've gone through, everything _I've_ gone through, you are not sending me away! You left me sitting at the top of that Goddess-forsaken hill and I had to watch while you ran to your death. You will not do that to me again!" Liara fumed, her biotics flaring

"Liara..." Shepard tried to soothe, but if anything it made Liara angrier

"No! Don't you dare 'Liara' me. Not now. Not here. I'm with you through to the end. I have to be with you."

Her voice broke at the end, and Garrus tried to make himself invisible. It was one thing to work in the same room while they were having a quarrel, it was another thing entirely to be right in the middle of it.

"I have to keep you safe. On the Normandy, no matter what happens here, you'll be safe."

Liara's hand twitched; clenched into a first. It glowed blue for a moment, then died. She seemed to shrink. "That's what you told me before. That's why I was stuck on Earth. Don't make me go through that again. If this fails, I would rather die with you then live alone, without you, without our daughter."

In Shepard's shoes, Garrus thought he'd probably have bundled Liara up in the biggest damn hug he could give her and whisper that everything would be okay. He was tempted to do it anyway, she looked so small, so tired and lost. Shepard just sighed, and turned her back. He saw the pain in her eyes though, a raging guilt. She looked as lost as Liara, in her own way. She'd always been too good at hiding her emotions.

"Garrus," Shepard said, snapping him out of his thoughts, "you go. No reason for all of us to die. If this doesn't work, I'm sorry."

"When has anything Liara come up with not worked? I seem to remember attacking a yahg. A really big yahg. And then, if I remember correctly, the Normandy had to go back there every weekend. Because someone," he nodded at Liara, "had taken over single handed."

"That is hardly accurate," Liara protested, still obviously angry but trying to control it.

"Close enough," Garrus countered, hoping, but failing, to get a smile from one of them.

"Just go, Garrus. Tell the Normandy to be ready to either come pick us up or to get the hell out."

He snorted, "Should have called me up sooner, you know, if you hadn't wanted to be rushed like this. It's not like I don't do this kind of thing...as my job."

"Shut up and go, Vakarian."

"Whatever you say ma'am," he laughed, giving her a mock salute. He squeezed Liara's shoulder in what he hoped was a reassuring way as he slipped out the door.

The numbers he'd seen...what they were planning...it could very well result in the Citadel being destroyed. They hadn't let him in on why he was calibrating the stations engines. He hadn't been given enough information to form a whole picture, and he had a feeling neither Shepard nor Liara had much of an idea of what they were doing either.

He considered, as he made his way back to the Normandy, that this should upset him more than it did. They hadn't known what the Omega-4 relay would bring either, and he hadn't flinched then. Well, maybe a little when he'd been shot, but he wouldn't admit to that.

He eyed the last stragglers set for the evacuation, and slipped around a back way to the Normandy's dock. There was an asari standing in front of the window when he approached. She was the only person he'd seen since he'd broken away from the evac crowds. She turned as he got closer, and he thought she looked slightly familiar.

"You work with Shepard." It wasn't a question.

"Possibly. Do I know you?"

"Matriarch Aethyta," she said, striding away from him toward the docking ramp. "Shepard's banging my daughter. I want to know what she's up to, and you're going to tell me."

Garrus was too shocked to answer, and simply followed her onto the ship.

* * *

"You have the all clear. I repeat, the Crucible is all clear to dock."

"Copy that, Crucible is clear. Contact in 10...9...8..." Shepard watched from the council podium as the crucible approached. "...3...2...contact. I repeat we have contact."

"Alright people," Hackett's voice echoed in Shepard's ear, "move out. Let's give the ladies some room to work."

Liara came up beside her, reaching out but stopping just short of touching her. Shepard knew she should say something, do something, to ease the tension between them, but she couldn't think of anything that wouldn't come out as being a joke. She smiled at her though, which she hoped would let her know she wasn't angry. She'd never been angry at Liara, she had just been a convenient body to vent that anger.

She should apologize for that, she knew. She shouldn't leave it hanging like this, not when they could all die in minutes. She'd tried, a couple of times, since she'd woken to find Liara asleep in the chair across the room, herself fully dressed and curled up on top of the blankets. Every time though, something had prevented it.

They stood in silence together, waiting for something to happen. Liara didn't know what to expect. When the crucible had docked the last time, she had been wrapped in a wool blanket, and a harried looking field nurse was trying to get her to drink a glass of water. Shepard had been up here alone. And her memory within Javik's shard hadn't said anything about what to do once they were here.

Liara pulled the shard out of her pocket. They'd watched it a few times in the last couple of months, but nothing new had dawned on them. Watching it again couldn't hurt, but she didn't think it would accomplish anything more either. She ran gloved fingers over it, then slipped it back into her pocket. It could wait. For a little while.

"Nothing happened," Shepard whispered.

"No. Apparently not," Liara answered cautiously. Shepard hadn't been quite as on edge as she'd been the night before, but the last time they had spoken was when she'd shouted at the spectre.

"Do you know how to get it working?" There was a small tinge of humor in her voice, that same quirky humor that Liara had done her hardest not to laugh at when they'd met. She had thought, at the time, that Shepard had been being serious.

"No. I... I never made it this far."

Shepard nodded, and moved away from the window. She didn't drag her feet as she moved back to the council chambers, didn't let her head hang in the defeat she felt. There may be only Liara around to see her, but she'd know...she'd know if she gave up.

She stood silently before the conference table, staring down at her tiny, scratchy writing. The crucible was docked, they'd done everything they could think of, but still nothing was working. There was no big button that said "Press Me". She'd even go for a slightly more scary "Do Not Touch" on a blinking red light. The room was quiet, the sound off on all the vid streams that were still being run on the walls. She heard Liara moving around in the other room, and wished she'd come over and stand with her. She didn't ask her to though. It was childish, foolish, stupid really, but she just couldn't get her mouth to form the words. She walked around the edge of the room, running her fingers along the smooth glass of their tops. She'd broken one the previous night, and she ran her fingers along the break, almost wishing it would cut her.

It would be something to keep her mind off the fact that she had no idea what to do.

Normally, it was simple. She'd rush in, guns blazing, and eventually the signs would point her in the right direction. The most complicated thing she'd done in a long time had been the VI lock on Noveria. And still that had been no more complicated that a children's game...

A children's game...

Phi on the Tower...

The tower...

_If you find the tower, if it shows up..._

_ What a bright child, your father would be proud..._

They had the wrong fucking tower!

"Liara!" she shouted, running back into the other room.

Liara jumped; she'd moved to stand by the glass ceiling over the garden below. Saren had fallen into it years before, and her mind had been on how different things were now when Shepard's shout had come from the far end of the room. "Yes Shepard? Are you okay?"

"Yes! I have it. You didn't happen to bring my armor did you?"

Liara stared at her, the question taking a moment to sink it. "Yes...I...I think it's in the hotel. Why?"

"Because." She was running now, down the stairs, through the small grassy area, toward the elevator. "I'm a god forsaken fool, that's why."

"What are you talking about?"

"When I was seven, I built a tower out of spare engine parts," she said.

"You talked about this with...with your mother. What does it have to do with this?" Liara asked, once they were in the slow moving elevator.

"Kind of. What I didn't say was that as a reward for having such 'pleasing proportioning, my young mathematician'" her voice dropped a couple octaves, and took on a heavy, and very fake, french accent for a moment before returning to her normal timbre, "Chief gave me a nut and bolt that had been drilled out. He turned it into a necklace."

"I didn't bring that. It's back on the Normandy." It had been in the trunk. She'd worn it herself, for a short time, right after Shepard had died the first time. It was bulky, though, and eventually she'd folded it back up in the scarf she'd found it in and returned it.

"True, but there's a secret in my armor."

"Why are we running, Shepard? And what secret?"

Shepard slowed to a brisk walk. "On the chest plate, just over my heart."

"I am still lost, Shepard."

"That nut and bolt had a number etched into it. Nothing special, just a manufacture's mark. I stopped wearing the necklace when I was a teenager, but it was always like my good luck charm. I etch the manufacturer's stamp number into my armor. All the time."

"And this is relevant...?"

"Because when I was given the necklace I was told it was for making Phi out of a tower of engine parts. And what does a hex bolt look like if you stand it on its end?"

"Oh. This would have been helpful to know months ago, Shepard," Liara deadpanned.

"Thank you for stating the obvious," Shepard grinned.

Shepard rushed into their hotel room, and began tearing the place apart looking for where Liara might have stowed her armor. It was in the closet, next to Liara's own. There were also a few other sets of clothes, which Shepard threw out of her way as she tossed the armor onto the floor.

"You don't have the number memorized? You etched it on there without having the necklace."

"No, I had the necklace. It was in my old luggage that you stole...'borrowed'. I knew you had it. Didn't have it while I was with Cerberus. Made me itch every time I had to go out into battle."

She flipped the chest plate over, and ran her finger over the numbers she'd carved into the inside.

"Shepard, this is foolish. Illira..."

"...had no idea about this because you didn't know about it. Right?" She didn't wait for an answer, just rushed over to the terminal in the hotel room's wall. She typed quickly, entering the number into the login screen for the hotel's extranet access, and as soon as the number was in there was a low hum that seemed to reverberate through the walls.

"And that's what we've been waiting for?" This was too ridiculous. It was absurd. It made Liara want to grind her teeth. Had they really spent all this time for something that had been sitting in a silk handkerchief at the bottom of a steamer trunk?

"The crucible has already docked. We might be too late," Shepard professed, her excitement of seconds before gone. The statement did not thing to calm Liara's nerves.

"I...Shepard? Your memory...," Liara pulled the shard out of her pocket again, and, ignoring the spectre's rapidly changing moods, flipped it over repeatedly in her hands. "You didn't mention this. If...you couldn't know I would come back. If we'd just found the Citadel Tower..."

"I was found in the remains of the tower."

"No. You were found in rubble on the Welsh coast."

"That rubble was the tower." She reached out, and took the shard from Liara's hand, brushing the asari's fingers as she did. They were thrown back into the memories. The history of an entire people. And as Liara watched Shepard cough up blood she saw it behind the dying commander. Sticking out of the ground, broken and burned almost beyond recognition, was the council podium. And beside it, the remains of the tower elevator. They watched Illira, and then broke apart, Liara quickly putting the shard away.

"That...how could you even remember that?"

"I didn't. I was guessing, grasping at straws. Let's see if I pulled the short one."

They walked out into a hallway they didn't recognize. The keepers that Shepard had taken control of earlier were now swarming around the halls, adjusting bulkheads, moving bridges. The couple moved through them, and they parted for them. They directed them. Shepard shrugged at Liara and let herself be led by the Keepers.

The hallways were unfamiliar now. Shepard could recognize parts, but they were quickly shifted by a keeper, or adjusted on hydraulics she hadn't known were there. Walls moved before her very eyes. But the waves of Keepers opened before them and closed behind them and guided them through the station without getting them blocked by any of the walls that suddenly appeared. Shepard supposed she should be more wary, but she felt calm and content as the Keepers moved them forward. She lost track of how many turns they took, but she didn't think it mattered much, chances were the path they'd taken didn't even exist anymore.

"Shepard," Hackett's voice cut in suddenly, "something's going on out here, we've got movement all over the station."

"The keepers are out in force, sir. It's...strange. The walls are moving. I don't recognize anything where I am. They're...taking us somewhere."

"We've got no change out in the Hegemony. Reports have the Reapers moving very slowly, but they're saying they've lost at least six colonies completely."

"Hopefully this will work and they won't lose anymore. Might make them rethink their human trafficking policies too."

"Keep us informed, Commander," Hackett said.

"I'm not-"

"When this is over, I'll personally make sure you're reinstated. Hackett out."

They'd reached a large archway, and the room beyond was dark. The Keepers that had been herding them were suddenly gone, scurrying away behind them. The sound of their strange feet echoed in the otherwise quiet halls.

They moved forward together, into the darkness. Shepard pulled her pistol though she doubted there was anything here to shoot at, and blinked rapidly as Liara began to glow a pale blue. Her biotics lit the room, bouncing off the metal walls. It was empty. A large circular dais was surrounded by a gaping chasm except on the narrow bridge they'd walked in on. As they reached the center, lights began to flicker on. They hummed, like fluorescents, though Shepard was fairly certain fluorescent lights had never been used on the Citadel.

"Where are we?" Liara asked, letting her hold on her biotics go. It was draining to hold onto them for too long, and if they ended up needing to fight, she didn't want to wear herself down too soon.

"I'm not sure. Shit, at least we know we're still on the station, right?"

"Yes, but where on the station? We were walking for some time."

Shepard didn't answer, but walked toward the edge of the small platform. As she reached the edge a terminal rose from the ground. She read it quickly, and hit a series of buttons on it. A viewing window appeared around them. The sky was empty. The fleet, the evacuation ships, and the Normandy had all pulled far enough back that if something were to go wrong, they'd be well away from any explosion. The stars twinkled. The mystery of the sparkling dots in the night sky had long been solved, and it was often faster to get to one of them than it was to cross a large room, but something about the stars called to Shepard. They were her home. It was where she belonged.

"It's beautiful," Liara whispered behind her.

"Yeah. It is. Let's go save it." Shepard turned back to the panel in front of her, trying to see if there was anything else on it that could help them. The Keepers had brought them here, and she doubted it was just for the view. On the right of the panel was a large, blinking button. It didn't have anything written on it, or near it, but it clearly had nothing to do with the shutter controls. This was what she'd been looking for. "Here goes nothing."

She hit the button.

The floor rose, and had the situation been just a bit less serious, Shepard probably would have laughed at Liara's surprised squeak. Instead, she placed a steadying hand on her shoulder, wincing slightly as Liara shrugged out of her grasp, and watched in awe as they rose to the point where the crucible was docked against the citadel.

The room they entered was serene. Like the room below, it had a full view of the stars around them but this room seemed to be lit by something more ethereal. The light came from nowhere, and everywhere. There were no shadows, but the light was not blinding.

Shepard stepped forward, leaving Liara behind on the elevator. In front of her was a bridge, and on the other side was something she recognized. In the memory on the shard, where she lay dying in the burning rubble of the citadel, this contraption had been there. It had been on fire, but it was still recognizable. She had been here before. Or she was supposed to be here in the future.

She would never get used to that.

She turned to tell Liara, but the asari wasn't looking at her. She was staring at the far side of the bridge, her mouth agape. Shepard followed her gaze, and immediately lifted her gun.

Benezia was walking towards them. Only she wasn't Benezia. She was there, but she wasn't. She glowed. She looked a bit like Avina, but with Benezia's face. And clothes, there was that too. But nothing Shepard had ever seen the Matriarch in before. She was in a long, flowing dress which didn't move as it approached.

"Little Wing," the thing that looked like Benezia said, "I had hoped you would come."

"Mother..." Liara gasped, stepping toward it.

It dawned on Shepard where she had seen something like this before. The child. The glowing child that had spoken in the fiery wreckage of the Citadel.

"Liara, NO!" Shepard shouted, but it was too late. She didn't know why she started running, but she was, and Liara was falling, and the thing was laughing, and she was going to be too late. She slid, catching the asari inches from the metal flooring. She clutched the other woman to her chest, but she was unresponsive. "Liara. Liara, no. What's wrong. Liara..."

The tears came unbidden. This was all wrong. She was breathing, Shepard thought. Or maybe that was wishful thinking. Shepard stroked her cheek, begging, pleading, for her to wake up.

The thing that was and wasn't Benezia was laughing. It's voice was cold, cruel as it laughed. Shepard knew it. The child. It sounded like a sick mix of the child in the memory and the woman she'd had to kill. The laughing reverberated around the room, loud enough, Shepard thought, to wake the dead.

But Liara didn't move. She lay limply in her arms, more doll than person.

And Shepard cried.


	21. Chapter 21

**To reasons unknown to any, this authors note didn't show up the first time. Hmm. Anyway, I totally mess with ME lore in this. Completely. Like almost rewrite it. So, if you don't like that, you should be able to skip everything that falls after the first section of bold text to when it shows up again without missing too much thats important. Other than you know, how everything worked, and stuff :) **

If felt like she'd been cradling the limp body for hours, but her training kicked in after merely seconds. Shepard lowered Liara to the ground, ignoring the laughter of the strange being a few feet away. She knew the basics of asari first aid, the same way she knew the basics of turian, krogan and quraian first aid. If Liara had been shot, or if she'd hit her head, she'd know what to do. But there was no clear physical trauma. She simply wouldn't wake up.

Shepard moved methodically though, her movements ingrained with years of training, years of watching friends fall in battle. She checked for physical wounds, but already knew there were none. She checked Liara's heartbeat, her breathing. The former was elevated and erratic, the latter steady but shallow. She wracked her brain for what that might mean for an asari, if it was the same as if she were human, if there was anything she should do for her.

"Liara, please," she begged, not knowing what else to say. She hadn't apologized for snapping, hadn't told her she loved her since they'd docked on the Citadel. It couldn't end like this.

Thoughts of the Reapers barely crossed her mind, but she knew that if she was going to get Liara help, she had to get them out of this room. The way back was no good, she'd never find her way out of the maze the keepers were creating, but there had to be a way forward; through the thing that looked like Benezia.

She leaned over, whispering, "I love you, stay with me, I'll get us out of this." She stopped the tears before they could come again. This wasn't the time. With great effort she began to get up, but as she moved to stand, Liara began to convulse.

She went stiff, her back arching off the ground, her head thrashing, banging against the floor. Her hands slammed into the ground and it looked like she was grasping from a purchase she couldn't find. Her mouth fell open in a silent scream, her body twisting at the waist in irregular spasms. Her eyes suddenly snapped open, and Shepard, who had even less experience with this than with fainting, moved quickly into her line of sight. But it was clear Liara wouldn't be able to see her.

Her eyes were swirling black. Shepard had never seen Liara's eyes like this when she wasn't the recipient of the meld, and she had to admit, even through her fear for her lover's life, that Ashley had a point about how creepy it looked. There was something about looking into those eyes and not feeling the gentle touch of Liara's mind against hers that was somehow more otherworldly than having the asari link their minds. She steadied Liara's head though, letting her seize, but doing her best to make sure she avoided hurting herself.

The thing that looked like Benezia had stopped laughing.

Shepard glanced at it, noticing that it looked scared. It was watching Liara, eyes glued to the convulsing woman while it tried to back away.

"No," it said, its hands going to its head, "You're dead. We made sure...you were all dead."

Shepard didn't have time to wonder about what it meant. She turned her eyes back to Liara, and wiped her brow. "Liara, relax, it's okay. It's going to be okay." She repeated that over and over, knowing the words meant nothing, that this was another promise to the asari she doubted she could keep, but she kept talking anyway. The thing that had been a child in her memory and was not Liara's mother watched wide-eyed, but she didn't think having it on the run like that was a bad thing. She turned back to Liara, who had gone board stiff in her arms, her body glowing brightly with pulsating biotics.

As Shepard watched, the blue glow coalesced into a ball of light that hovered a couple of inches above Liara's sternum. It rose slowly, and Shepard couldn't pull her eyes from it. It floated away, long blue tendrils of biotic energy tethering it to Liara's body. When it had floated near ten feet from the two women on the floor, it began to grow. As Shepard watched it filled out, gaining arms, legs, a head. It looked like a child's drawing of an asari, the facial proportions all wrong, but the intent behind what it was supposed to be clear.

It turned, glancing once at Liara on the floor, then back at the thing that looked like Benezia. It raised its arms, and grew taller, standing now near a dozen feet high.

"**I am Athame,**" it said, blue fire raging in its hands, "**Goddess of All. I am Arashu, Goddess of Protection. I am Gerihari, Titan of the East. I am Isis, and Shiva, and the Mother Mary,**" it intoned, its voice echoing off the walls. The constant beeping in Shepard's translator told her it was speaking multiple languages. Drell, possibly, certainly Turian. It continued to speak, naming religious figures from all the major galactic players. Then the translator died, but it continued to speak. Low hisses, sharp clicks, slow guttural words that Shepard couldn't understand filled the room. And then it said one last thing, in a language like music, rising in pitch and tone as it sang a name not heard, in a language long forgotten. And the thing that was Benezia was no longer.

In its place stood a creature. It body proportions reminded Shepard of some of the old vids from the late 20th and early 21st centuries she'd seen on alien life. Long limbs all disproportionate to the body, its head appearing too big to be held up by its too small neck. It was bipedal, this creature, with small, almost dainty feet, and long tapered fingers on its two hands. It's head though...it's head was a nightmare.

It held four faces, like a cherubim, stuck in its single skull. It's eight eyes were trained on the thing that had come from Liara, and it cowered before it. It sunk to the floor, hiding its too many faces behind its arm, and Shepard thought that perhaps it had begun to weep. She felt a stab of pity for the creature; bile and fear rising in her own throat as she listened to the creature that was still tied to Liara. The asari was still clearly having trouble breathing, her chest hardly moving, her heartbeat wild. As the four-faced creature sank back toward the glowing lights at the far side of the central bridge, the figure of biotic light turned back toward the women, kneeling slowly beside them.

"What are you?" Shepard managed to force past her suddenly dry lips. "What are you doing to Liara? Stay away."

"I would do nothing to harm her, but I cannot say for certain that she will survive this. It has been many many years since one of our species has separated," the thing said, its voice quiet now, barely a whisper. "This is all my fault," it continued, reaching out to run a finger along Liara's temple. Shepard fought the urge to slap it away.

"What are you?" she repeated instead.

It laid a hand on Liara's chest before answering, and her breathing and heartbeat evened out. She could easily have just been asleep. "She rests. I do what I can for her." It stood, raising its hands to bring Shepard's attention to the room they were in. "And I am the last of the ones that built this. My ancestors were the light and the power of the galaxy. We were a promise of the future," it said, wistfully.

"You're a Reaper?" Shepard whispered, wanting to back away from it, but unwilling to leave Liara alone near it. She reached out for her pistol, but it had fallen from her hand when she'd sprinted to catch Liara as she fell.

It spun quickly, anger flashing in its blue eyes, "What? No." It glared at Shepard, its eyes accusatory. It's voice was was again little more than a whisper when it spoke again. "But we are responsible. My race, we have no physical form. We are dependent upon a host for our survival, and at the beginning we shared the body of but one race. The race that built the first Reapers. There have never been many of us, and their race propped those among them that held us up as akin to gods. But as that race advanced, aided by the knowledge of my people, they came to resent us. They built us new hosts." It walked over to the one small area of the room where the floor reached the glass viewing window and laid a hand on it, staring out at the blackness of space. "Bio-synthetic forms with remedial intelligence, at best. We took them, and then we went to the stars. And like your friend, the asari, we discovered we were not limited to one race. We became caught up in the newness of these other races we discovered. We built this," it waved at the citadel, "and the relays, so that we could move freely among the races we discovered. We...I believe the term you use is uplifted...races not quite ready for star travel. We guided them, taught them the power of the mass effect. And we soon forgot about where we came from. And eventually, they found a way to use our own technology against us."

It moved back to Shepard and took her hand, shifting it so that Liara sat at a different angle. The asari sighed, and relaxed a bit more.

"The bio-synthetic AIs they had made for us learned quickly, though. War was inevitable. We could have stopped it. We could have prevented this." It hung its head, its bright blue glow fading slightly. "We did not. And when we heard what they were doing, we ran. We hid. Shame makes us do crazy things."

"How do you know this? How old are you? What have you been doing to Liara?"

"I am One hundred and nine, I will one hundred and ten in three months," it said, smiling down at the still prone figure of Liara. "I was born with her. We have been constant sisters, though she did not know I was there. But my people have always had ancestral memory, we are all one, and the one is all."

"I'm going to wake back up in the hotel on the Presidium, aren't I?" Shepard hoped it was a dream, that she'd wake up in a second and Liara would be wrapped warmly in her arms, not lying still on her lap.

"This is no dream. I do wish sometimes it was. Some of my people tried to fight, in the early years. We were nearly wiped out. This...construct...of our original hosts could not 'reap' us as they do carbon based life, but they could kill us just the same. They almost did. In the end, we found ways to avoid them, to convince them we were gone. For many hundreds of thousands of years we jumped from species to species, avoiding any contact with our old friends."

"Cowards," Shepard muttered, but there was little feeling behind it.

"It was already too late to save them, or ourselves, by the time we got involved. They tried to save themselves, because we had abandoned them, and ended up killing themselves in the process. And all advanced life, every fifty thousand years. We laid plans, for the device you used here, on small, insignificant worlds, hoping eventually to see it to fruition. When we had discovered they had housed their AI here, we thought we knew how to stop it. We never succeeded. We waited, we prayed, we once again made ourselves into gods. We failed. Again and again we failed. We had lost hope.

"And then we discovered the planet you call Thessia. The whole planet is covered in Eezo. More than could ever be mined, and it creates it at an unheard of rate. The very blood of the species that live there flow with it. And into this evolved the asari, the only organics in the galaxy who exist even partially in my world. Even you, with all your biotic power, are but standing at a threshold compared to even the weakest asari biotic.

"As the Protheans rose, they soon began studying many of the less developed cultures. We used it, to discover more about this new race. We used it to push the Protheans to protect the asari. And then one of us discovered a dying asari in the wastes.

"They were tribal, you must understand. Exile was the most common form of punishment. She was dying. There was but one way to save her. A host now, this asari taught her people what the Protheans did not. Math. Science. Farming. They took credit all the same," the thing laughed. "And she bore three daughters. Each of those daughters held one of my people. New born, weak, they grew with their hosts. Two died, young, their bodies unable to withstand the energy requirements my people have. One survived.

"She was named Liara," it finished, a warm smile crossing its lips.

"That doesn't explain why the Reapers are doing this. Why you're here. Why she's sick. What you are. I just want to know what the fuck is going on!" Shepard's voice echoed in the room, and Liara stirred fitfully on her lap. She winced, running a soothing a hand over Liara's forehead and dropping her voice. "I just want to know what is happening."

"That first Liara went on to found Athame's church, on Thessia. And all her daughters, and their daughters were taught the history of their line. Until Benezia."

"Why not her?" There were more questions. Better questions. This was the only one that made it past Shepard's lips.

"I am not sure, entirely. _My_ mother was unable to make the necessary push to make her enter the church, to follow in her own mother's footsteps. I have been equally ineffective with Liara. My mother believed it was the dilution of the blood line. Benezia's father was not asari, and the genetic patterns of the other species asari meld with might cause problems with our ability to connect with them."

"But Liara's other parent is an asari."

"I do not have all the answers. I do not know why the Reapers are programmed to come back whenever a civilization reaches a terminus point. I do now know why they seem to dislike you so much. If I had that information, I would have given it to you."

Shepard fumed. She had more questions than answers and she didn't know where to begin. She had no desire to believe a word this thing said, but as long as that long tendril of blue biotic power linked it to Liara she would listen. She had a feeling breaking it would not help the ill asari.

Keeping her anger I check, her worry buried as far down as she could, she lifted her face up to the glowing figure. It had more recognizable features now, and it appeared more solid. It was still not quite asari in nature, but it looked more feminine, more alive, and less like a cubist rendering of the species. "I don't believe a word of this."

"And you don't need to. Belief that something is untrue does not change that it is. I tell you this only so you can understand. Why I did what I did."

"What did you do?" she asked through clenched teeth. Her arms tightened around Liara, who still lay unconscious.

"I have caused her pain. My attempts to guide her were fought. The dreams, the...she did not appreciate being pushed, and it caused her anguish."

"The what?" There had been something else, and Shepard had an idea of what it was. That this...thing...being...whatever it was, was the reason Liara had never been able to move on. It was the reason Liara always looked so damn sad.

"You must understand. I knew her feelings. At the time had she done anything that could have hurt her relationship with you it would have been devastating. Even then, she was the hope of survival. But...she is less than herself without you."

"You mean, _you_ were the hope. You played her like a damn puppet to meet your own ends. You destroy all chance of her happiness! And when I succeeded without you? When the Reapers were gone, why did you continue to play your goddamned charade with her then?"

"No. She was, and is, the hope of the future. She is the last of a bloodline that can be traced back seventy-five thousand years. Even for asari, that is no small feat. Her children will be the light that my people were supposed to be. Illira...there was so much promise in her. Without the war she will accomplish amazing things."

"You can see the future too?" Shepard scoffed.

"No. But I could see her potential. My own daughter was the one who laid the ground work for this...for my returning here with Liara. Without the threat of the Reapers, the asari have the chance to do amazing things, to enlighten a galaxy. What gives them this power is also what makes them reluctant to use it, though, but Liara, with the weight of her family behind her can change that. She can give the galaxy peace."

"If you don't kill her."

"Should she not survive, her role shall fall on you. But she is strong, and I don't do-" The thing stopped speak and turned around.

The creature that had once held Benezia's form had stood up. It had a look of determination on each of its four faces, and a sneer to match. It strode toward them, long arms held stiffly at its sides.

"I do not fear you, enlightened one. You are of the old world. You are already dead, you just do not know it yet." It lifted its hands, its head tilting back. The machine behind it began to glow. Red, blue, green. "You will serve, as all others have served."

The thing wiped a hand at the creature and flung it down against the floor. It writhed, unable to break free of whatever invisible bonds were holding it.

"I apologize. I will deal with it shortly. I was saying I doubt that she will pass. Already she grows stronger, even as I feed off more energy than I ever have before."

Shepard didn't answer. Something was nagging at her. It had been eating away since the thing had first started speaking but it was finally resolving into a coherent thought.

"You're lying," Shepard said.

"I am not. I do not know what else I can do to make you believe."

"You are. If all this was true, then why not just give Liara the answer to my damn riddle? And how did that," she pointed at the creature still fighting on the floor, "know about the controls? Why would it tell me?"

"It thought you were dead. You were dead. And it had the combined memories of every race it has ever harvested. We were...less than careful...early on. It discovered our plans when it took a species we'd been helping to fight it. We never got so close to ending them as we had then, until now. It knows all that I do, and more. It would have received the coding required to activate the program that changed the environmental controls that allows me to live outside her when the crucible docked. It would not have seen any reason to not tell you. But until it docked, there was no coding, and so I could not know it. I cannot explain any better."

"I thought you said your people could not live outside of a host." So many holes. There were so many holes in its story, and Shepard didn't care, she just wanted Liara somewhere safe, but if she had to play the game, she would.

"We are nothing but electrical impulses. We have no bodies. I suppose I misspoke by saying we cannot _live, _we simply do not live as you would understand it. The rules of life that your biologists expound do not apply to us outside of a host. We do not breathe, we do not eat, we cannot breed, without a host. We exist merely as consciousness. However, with the right environment, the right electrical impulses, I can take this form, or any form, and can at the very least communicate. Which is what the crucible was designed to do. To let us talk to the AI that had killed everything we knew."

Shepard opened her mouth to question her again, but the creature on the floor had broken free of whatever was holding it. Fury raged in its four faces, and it ran toward them. Light streaked out behind it, distorting its shape, making it appear all the more grotesque. The being that was still tethered to Liara turned, raising back up to its dozen foot height, and stretching its arms out again.

"**You have tormented this galaxy for the last time.**" the being shouted, it's voice rising, filling the room once again.

"You will not succeed," the creature said as it neared, snarling. Virtual spittle flew from its mouth, and it flickered in and out of existence as its anger grew.

"**I have already succeeded. I was the first, as I am the last. You will know the punishment for pride.**"

"It was not pride! It was not sin! You are not gods! I must keep order. Chaos cannot reign, was cannot be permitted." It's voice reminded Shepard of Harbinger, but softer, more musical.

"**War is what you create. You deny them the chance to learn. You pull their hands from the fire before they can burn themselves. It is not right.**"

"It is no more than what you did! Fine, choose! Make your choice, oh goddess of my ancestors," it sneered, "may the wrath of the angels curse you forever."

The being turned back to Shepard, and had she not known better the spectre would have thought it was crying. "I do not know if this will kill her. We have never tried...not with asari."

"What are you saying to them!" the creature hissed.

"**I reject your choice. You have doomed yourself."**

"You have no choice, goddess. You know the design, you know its weaknesses, and you know there are no other options."

"**There is sacrifice,**" it said, growing ever larger.

"NO!" Shepard shouted, reaching out towards it, still cradling Liara's head in her lap. She couldn't reach the being, couldn't stop what it intended. Couldn't stop it from risking the life of the woman she loved.

The tendrils of biotic power that connected the being to Liara broke, and it rose up off the floor, floating above their heads. The creature stared up at it, all four of its mouths slack. The form the being had had dissolved, and it became just a blue cloud hovering near the ceiling. Liara stirred fitfully, and Shepard eased her up, sitting her across her lap, head against her shoulder. Her breathing was better, her heart rate normal. Her eyes opened for a brief moment, and they were blue again. Shepard smiled at her, and she returned it briefly before once against going limp. Her breath was warm against Shepard's neck and she focused on that feeling, on knowing Liara was alive.

The eerie glow of the room seemed to fade as the blue cloud grew overhead. Where before there were no shadows, now the entire room was cast in shadow. They stretched long over the floor, jumping as the blue cloud shifted around the room. The creature took a step backwards, over the bridge, its arms coming up once again to shield its face. The blue cloud, Shepard had never learned its name, she should have asked its name, had grown large enough to fill the room. Lightening crackled on its surface, making the hairs on the back of Shepard's neck stand on end. The whole room seem electrified.

With a flash, and resounding thunder, the cloud ripped into three. It flowed into the the machine at the end of the room, twisting and twining through the mechanical parts.

"No. Nonono. You can't do this. It is not enough. Sacrifice is _required._ No," the creature repeated over and over again, its faces hidden.

"**I give myself freely and without coercion. Otherwise it is no sacrifice, but martyrdom. Know this, as you die.**" The blue cloud was suddenly a bright, glittering gold. Where before the additive colors of light had flickered, perhaps causing the white, ephemeral light that had once encased the room, now they swirled with gold. They became cloudy as the gold tinge encompassed them, but grew brighter, stronger.

The creature seemed to disintegrate before Shepard's eyes. Like pixels on an old computer it dissolved, leaving nothing but the light. And the light grew. It charged, and there was thunder without sound and the light grew too bright for Shepard's eyes.

She buried her face in the top of Liara's head and waited.

* * *

Admiral Hackett saw the light and though he had never considered himself to be much of a religious man, he crossed himself just the same. There weren't many things that light could be, and the most likely one was that Shepard had failed and that the Citadel had ceased to exist.

"Let's get the civilians out of here," he said, turning to his crew, "We're going to need to find a home for all of them now."

It was strange, thinking that Shepard was dead. She, like her mother, was a force that just seemed to go on endlessly. It would always be there. Just like there would always be stars and planets and sun-ripened tomatoes whenever he made it back to Earth, so would there always be Shepard. He hadn't always seen eye to eye with her, but she had been a good soldier. Right up to the end.

"Sir, we have an incoming message from the Normandy."

"Patch it though."

"Don't you even dare think about it," came the scratchy voice. He didn't recognize it, but he did recognize Jeff Moreau in the background trying to stop whoever was talking. "My kids on that damn thing, and she's not dead. So don't you dare pull out until we know for sure. And tell this upstart kid with the limp to get this goddess-damned ship over there to find out what happened."

"May I ask who it is I'm speaking with?" he asked, not knowing many of Shepard's crew since the ship had been handed over to the council.

"Aethyta. Matriarch Aethyta, and that idiot Commander of yours had my daughter on there. I'm going to kick her sorry ass so hard she'll be eating with it."

"Your daughter, ma'am?" He didn't know this Aethyta, but it was generally wise to be polite to asari Matriarchs. Even ones that didn't sound anything like any other Matriarch he'd ever spoken to.

"Dr. Liara T'Soni. And if she dies, its on you."

The connection was cut off, and just as he was about to try get the Normandy back, the ship flew off toward the source of the explosion.

* * *

Jenar looked up at the sky of Khar'shan and wept. She held her daughter close to her. The infant was screaming, tears pouring from her tiny eyes. The sky was red and ash fell all around her. Her son buried his face in her skirts. This is what the end looks like, she thought, this is how we die.

She'd known the moment her husband had joined the pirate gang and left the home world that her end would not be peaceful. One did not simply leave batarian space and get away with it. There had been little work on the home world, though, and there was money outside the Hegemony. That money had kept her children fed, and had kept her out of debtors prison, but it had also brought her to the attention of the authorities.

As she watched the large ships begin their decent onto her home she almost wished for the bullet that would have otherwise been her punishment.

A group of teenagers were rallying a much larger group of slaves in an attempt to create a blockade on the street. Soldiers were filing in now, as well, but she didn't see how any of it would save them from the thing that was closing in on them. She'd heard rumors that such things had been happening in the colonies, but there had been nothing on the news. She held her daughter tight, and gripped her sons hand. She did not doubt that her government had known. That it had done nothing. Just as it had tried to prevent her husband from working. Just as it prevented her family from leaving to find somewhere where they could be happy.

She knelt, adjusting the baby on her shoulder.

"My son," she said, "come, pray with me."

The little boy looked up at here with terrified eyes, but knelt beside her just the same. His tiny hands rubbed at his four eyes, then he clasped them before him.

They prayed together, mother and son, as the Reapers descended.

"Mommy," the boy asked after they'd fallen silent, "did the humans do this?"

"I do not know, eyes of my life. I don't know. I do not think so."

The boy shook his head. "I don't either, no matter what Daddy would say."

As he spoke the sky seemed to explode in a golden light. It was bright enough to blind, but Jenar could still see even after the light had faded. When it was gone, so were the ships.

Where before the sky had been red and filled with gray ash, now there were golden clouds on blue skies. Her son smiled, holding out his hands. Ash still fell, but it was no longer gray and hot. Like snowflakes, the ash fell in streaks of green and red and blue, and it felt almost cold to the touch.

"Is it snow?" he asked in wonder.

"No. It is the answer to our prayer."

* * *

A secondary force of Reapers moved out of the Hegemony. They approached the relay. Harbinger was smug. Harbinger ignored the warning signal from that which controlled it. It knew it should not have brought all of them with it, but things were going well.

Shepard had yet to appear.

They would take this fight to Shepard now. These other organics were done. They had no where. Shortly, there would not be a single one left.

That made Harbinger happy.

Not as happy as if it were Shepard that would cease to exist, but it knew better than to be picky.

If it had had lips, it would have hummed.

They approached the relay.

Then SHE appeared.

She had come with the bubble, it could tell.

But more than that, she was one of Them. The ones that had come before. The ones Harbinger had once worshiped before it was Harbinger. The souls that made up its being rejoiced. Harbinger grew angry.

She had no form, She was all and not. She came on the beam. Gold and light and pure and beautiful.

The other Reapers accepted their fate. They were gone before Harbinger could react.

It fought. She succeeded.

And as it ceased to exist, as all its programing came to naught, it had one final beautiful thought.

This thought was not of Harbinger, but of those that made up Harbinger. It was not a thought devised of programming, but of souls. It was a very organic thought.

Harbinger thought, _Thank you._

* * *

_And that's kinda the end, maybe. I have one more chapter that's more an epilogue than anything and that's it. Buuuuut...I dunno. I kinda like leaving it open like this. Did they live? Is the galaxy safe? Was it all some sort of elaborte dream on Liara's part? Maybe I'll make that a new story so I can run with it for longer. Give me a couple days to decide :D_


	22. Epilogue: I Am

**So, the epilogue is dedicated to Theodur for being kinda awesome and because of a certain asari adept :) I might still write the sequel, but for now, have a happy ending :)**

* * *

The water shut off in the bathroom. The soft lilting hum continued, though. It was some new fashionable song that had been playing non stop on every music channel for much too long. The maidens liked it, the human teenagers liked it, and apparently that was enough for it to be everywhere. It was not, however, enough to make Erra on-time for work. Teiron had already covered for her daughter three times in as many weeks, and she was not about to do it again.

She leaned against the door frame into the large bathroom and shook her head as she watched her daughter sway her hips in time to the song she was humming. She moved with much more grace than her mother had ever had, and had Teiron been any younger she probably would have been jealous. But she was over five hundred now, well into her middle age, and the fact that she was probably the only asari that couldn't dance had long stopped being an issue. And she'd picked up a thing of two in those years, specifically while she was Omega, and though she'd never have her daughter's grace she could hold her own if she went out.

"Erra, honey, you're going to be late again."

The seventy-year-old glared over her shoulder, her song stopping as she stared her mother down. "I'm not a kid anymore, mom. It's my life."

"You live under my roof. I'm not going to keep covering for you." It was bad enough that the girl still lived at home. If it had been up to Teiron, Erra would have been out on her own ten years before, if not sooner. But her bondmate, who was not Erra's father, had made concessions for the girl, and was much too fond of her in Teiron's opinion.

Not that she didn't love her daughter. She did, very much so. Still, it was hard not to remember exactly why she had her. It had not been love, or maybe it had been, in a strange twisted way. But she hadn't loved the girl's father. Hadn't even seen the turian who had sired her since the night she'd gotten pregnant.

It had been a mistake, really.

She'd been sitting at a bar, nursing the same drink for way too many hours. Her maiden years were behind her, she had nothing to show for it, and everything she saw reminded her of...her. The bar. The human drinking a whiskey on the rocks in the corner. Not that...she...had ever drunk her whiskey over ice. It had always been straight up, and she had always laughed whenever Teiron had scowled at the smell. She'd had lovers since...her...a fair few, and in truth she had never slept with Dr. T'Soni.

Yet, centuries after they'd parted ways on Illium, Teiron had been sitting in a bar on the Citadel and had been thinking about her. The sound of her laugh, the way that she had blushed when she smiled, even when she wasn't really embarrassed, the way she had held on hope that her dead lover would come back to her. The way she'd been in that bar on Illium, a bar very much like the one Teiron had sat in the night Erra was concieved, waiting for a turian horticulturist and had seen her sitting alone in a corner. How it had taken every drop of courage to approach her. Even from a distance she'd known who she was. It was hard not to know who Liara T'Soni was so soon after the news of her mother's betrayal had hit the news.

She had never expected them to become friends.

She had never expected to fall in love.

She'd been about to get up and leave, to head back to her tiny, lonely, apartment, when the movie trailer had started on the tiny vid screen behind the bar.

_Normandy Rising: The Hunt for Saren._

And there she had been, a still image, as the trailer had thrown up image after image of the Normandy's crew. The second Normandy had been decommisioned years before, its AI transferred to Rannoch and the ship itself in a museum on Earth. But she had been the same, the same smile, the same eyes. The actress playing her simply couldn't do her justice.

And Teiron had broken down, found a nearby turian that looked something that like the horticulturist she'd been meeting that fateful night and had conceived her daughter. She'd woken up, the turian had been gone, and she had spent the next few weeks hoping that the pregnancy wouldn't take. Less than ten percent of asari pregnancies did, she told herself, she was perfectly safe. Only, she'd been at that perfect age when almost all asari pregnancies take, and sure enough Erra had come kicking and screaming into the world two years later.

Not that she minded. She loved her daughter, and had never regretted for a second that she'd had her. Except when she acted like this.

"Then don't. Goddess, mom, just let me alone, I'll be on time."

Teiron shook her head as she watched her daughter double-check that she had covered all her facial markings. It was apparently unfashionable to have them on display, and Erra wasn't anything if she wasn't fashionable. Teiron really wasn't sure how they were related, and was mostly convinced that her own daughter had been switched in the hospital. Well, other than the fact that she'd seen her daughter while the umbilicals had still been attached, and her markings looked very much like the ones Erra was trying very hard to hide.

She moved away, checking the time on her omni-tool. If Erra skipped breakfast, she might actually make it to work on time. It was better than most days, Teiron supposed. Teiron cleaned her way along the hallway, stopping as she reached the bedroom. She peered inside, smiling warmly at what she saw. Her bondmate lay under the blankets, one foot stuck out near the bottom of the bed. She wanted to crawl back into bed and wake her bondmate, but didn't think the sleeper would appreciate it. Teiron was of the opinion that by seventy not only should her daughter be well aware of what her mother and step-father got up to, but should have first hand knowledge of it. Her bondmate, on the other hand, was rather stuffy about that sort of thing. The home they shared on Thessia, like many asari buildings, had few doors, and if Erra decided to walk through the common area of the home rather than going out the back, Teiron would never hear the end of it from her lover.

Still, Teiron thought glancing down the hallway, Erra would probably be gone before anything really happened. A wicked grin spreading across her features, she padded across the room. She was sure her bondmate would forgive her.

Her omni-tool beeped. Halfway to the bed, she growled and made her way quickly down the hallway. That wasn't the way she wanted her lover to wake.

Less so when she saw who was calling.

"Illira! Is everything okay?"

The young asari on the other end of the call looked haggard. There were heavy bags under her eyes, and her smile was strained. There was a warbling, wet cry in the background.

"I can't do it," she said, on the verge of tears.

"Can't do what?" Illira had been Erra's teacher back when the girl had been twenty or so. She and Teiron had become, and stayed, good friends over the years. It was amazing how much the younger asari looked like her father. Teiron had met her once, years and years ago. The asari on the other end of the call had the human's eyes, right down to the tiny little creases at the sides. Teiron hadn't known what to make of Commander Shepard when she'd met her, but she liked her eldest daughter well enough.

"Be a father! She won't stop crying. I've fed her and changed her and rocked her and she just won't stop! Help me!"

Teiron did her best not to laugh. "Where is Nillye?"

"Earth. She had a conference to go to, and I said I could look after Mieyo for a few days. She'd my daughter, I should be able to do this!" She shifted the infant, who had just been off-screen in her arms, and laid her against her shoulder. Tiny fists were flailing, socked feet thrashing as the infant wailed. She was no more than six months old, and in Teiron's opinion much too young to be away from her mother, but she'd do what could.

"Is it gas?" she asked, settling down on one of the sofas in the room.

"No. I've done everything the books said. Everything."

Teiron leaned forward, eyeing the screaming child. With a smile she leaned back. "Rub her neck folds, Illira."

"What? No! That's dangerous. All the books-"

"Not hard. Softly, against the skin."

Illira looked terrified, but did what she was told.

Ten minutes later the child lay limply against Illira's shoulder, murmuring softly in her sleep.

"See, I told you," Teiron laughed.

"How? Why didn't anything I read say to do that? A few of them said specifically not to do that," Illira whispered, rubbing the child's back in slow circles.

"Probably to keep from getting sued if some unsuspecting mother pressed too hard and damaged the exposed nerve endings under the folds. You know how lawyers are."

Illira grunted her agreement. "I'm going to go lay her down, don't go anywhere."

Teiron tucked her feet up under her as she watched Illira walk through her home on the Citadel. The nursery was filled with bright colors except for the large N7 propaganda poster on one wall. It was one with Commander Shepard on it, taken just after the Batarian Action of 2186. Someone had scribbled 'Grandpa' in gold lettering across one corner. The young woman lay the baby down gently into the crib, kissed her on the top of her undeveloped crest and then tiptoed out of the room.

"Finally," Illira breathed as the nursery door shut behind her. "I didn't think I'd ever get her to sleep."

"She's still very young," Teiron told her, "and you're still fairly new to it all. How is Nillye handling it? And being away from her?"

"She's got the whole 'mom' thing down. She's been calling every ten minutes since she left though, to make sure she's okay. _Except_ for last night...when I needed to talk to her."

Teiron laughed. She'd raised Erra alone, hadn't even had her own mother for help. It was nice to be there for Illira now, though.

"How's your bondmate?" Illira asked teasingly, drawing the last word out with an almost sing-song lilt.

Teiron prided herself on not being phased by much. She'd withstood working with the head of Omega. The then-pirate-queen now respectable-business-owner had seemingly done everything in her power to make Teiron uncomfortable, the more so once she'd discovered that Teiron was familiar with a member of Commander Shepard's crew. She'd taken that stoically, just as she had the sudden change from backwater merc head to high-powered CEO that Aria had made after taking control of the human organization Cerberus. By the time Teiron had left her position as spy on Omega, the brand of the same name was synonymous with everything from bio-amps to cheese dips. Cerberus had had some of the largest, most well-funded research stations in the galaxy, and Aria and used them all to her advantage. Teiron even used Omega brand toothpaste. The stuff was amazing.

This, however, always made her a little uncomfortable. Talking to Illira about her bondmate always left her feeling slightly off-center. She knew that Illira didn't care. She'd been at the ceremony, smile splitting her face. Still, Teiron did her best to not talk about it around the younger asari. It always came up eventually, and it wasn't like they could avoid the truth, but Teiron didn't like rubbing it in the younger woman's face. No matter how amused Illira always seemed by it.

"Fine," she answered curtly, "asleep."

"Baby's okay?" Illira pried, her smile widening. It wiped the exhaustion from her face, making her look younger than her 306 years.

"Baby's fine." This was also a bit of a sore point for Teiron. Not the fact that she was about to have a daughter with the woman she loved, but just talking about it with Illira. They had been friends first, and that Teiron's bondmate was now pregnant seemed wrong to discuss. It shouldn't bother her, she knew, but the path to get here had been so complicated, so convoluted and twisted that occasionally, it did.

"Nillye and I are thinking about- Oh, hi mom!" Teiron turned sharply. She hadn't heard her bondmate come up behind her, padding gently on bare feet across the house.

Liara smiled at Teiron and leaned over her shoulder, hands braced on the back of the sofa. "Good morning, Illy. Everything alright?"

"Fine now, mom. Couldn't get the little one to sleep."

"I feel I should be offended you did not call me first."

"You _should be_ in bed. I didn't want to disturb you. You need to keep my baby sister safe. How far along are you again?" Illira chided as she watched her mother walk around and sit next to Teiron.

"Twenty months as you well know. I can take a phone call from my daughter without over taxing myself." She curled up against Teiron's side so she could see the small screen on her arm. "And where is Nillye?"

"Anything happens to my sister, I'm gonna kick the blue right off your ass mom," Illira teased. "And she's on Earth, conference."

"What is she doing on Earth?" Liara snapped, sitting up straight. "Her daughter is barely six months old. She's still nursing!"

"It's fine, mother. This is why I didn't mention it. It's only for a few days."

Liara huffed, and Teiron laughed. It earned her a punch in the arm, but it was worth it. Everything was worth it to have this woman beside her.

"You need sleep, Illira. Call us back when you've rested," Teiron said. She ended the call and turned to her bondmate, who was still scowling over the fact her daughter-in-law had left Illira and Mieyo to their own devices. Teiron did agree that the baby was probably a bit young to be away from her mother, but Illira was an amazing father and could more than handle the girl for a single weekend alone.

"I can't believe she'd leave like that," Liara murmured, curling back up against Teiron's side.

Teiron placed a hand on Liara's stomach, rubbing gently. "You don't trust your daughter?"

"Of course I do. I trust all of them, but that doesn't change the fact that Nillye decided to carry their child. It leaves Illira ill-equipped to handle the child on her own."

"It does no such thing. Her own father handled Illira and her sisters just fine didn't she? And I seem to remember something about her being human?"

That earned her another gentle punch, but it was accompanied by a small laugh.

"When did you become so smart?" Liara asked, shifting to kiss Teiron on the side of the mouth.

"Always have been. It was the smell of that damn whiskey that always made me seem like an idiot." She wrapped an arm around Liara's shoulders and wondered, not for the first time, how the hell she'd gotten so lucky.

When they had run into each other on the Citadel fifty years before Teiron had expected things to go much like they had the last time they had met. She'd expected it to be awkward, neither willing to meet the others eyes, with lots of shrugs and "So, what have you been up to"s. It had been, she supposed to a degree. Illira had been teaching on the Presidium green. It was one of the upper human classes, the asari middle grades she normally taught let off school because of a power fluctuation. That, Teiron had learned later, had been the reason Liara had been on the Citadel in the first place, not her daughter. She'd heard about the mass evacuation, and the small explosion that had left parts of the Citadel uninhabitable for decades, but had not been aware that that was the cause of many of the power issues the station continued to have. Or that the former-archeologist-turned-info-broker was the only person, besides Commander Shepard who had passed in her sleep forty years prior to that fateful meeting, was the only one who knew how to fix them. Liara's youngest daughter, Kiyett, had taken the mantle over from her mother a few years later, and worked full-time with the Citadel engineers now.

There had been little awkwardness, though, between them. Surprise, certainly, but then Erra had come up, carrying two oversized ice cream cones and in that single moment Teiron watched Liara transform. It had been a beautiful thing, the more so when it became clear that Erra liked her. Of course, neither had said then what they'd been thinking. Liara hadn't asked about Erra's father, and Teiron hadn't asked about Shepard and whether she was going to come back from the dead again. She hadn't asked if Liara had ever found a cure to what had landed her in a hospital when they had first known each other. Instead, they had talked about Erra, and Liara's three daughters. Teiron had already known who Illira's mother was, of course, despite all three of Liara's daughters having taken Shepard's surname in deference to human custom. Shepard's relationship with Liara had not only been the stuff of the tabloids, but they had made two straight-to-vid movies and written half a dozen books on the couple before their children had even been old enough to tie their own shoes. She had never mentioned her relationship with Liara to Illira though, even after she had begun to consider the younger asari a friend.

But just like before, they had fallen into an easy friendship. With a twenty-year-old daughter there had been far fewer late nights at the bar then when they had first met, but there had been plenty of evenings, the three of them, playing board games in Teiron's tiny apartment, or Saturday morning walks through the Presidium. Teiron had been more than happy with that. It had been everything she could have ever hoped for, to regain the friendship the two of them had lost.

Only it hadn't stopped there.

Teiron still, fifty years later, couldn't believe she had gotten so lucky.

That late, rainy evening on Thessia. School had been out, Erra had been at a summer camp on a colony world, and Liara had invited her to her home for the weekend. To remember what it was like to talk to an adult without being interrupted, Liara had said.

She had walked up to the sprawling, ancient house in Armali and had realized she had never felt quite so inadequate as she did right them. The building was probably the oldest non-religious structure on the planet, and Teiron was fairly sure that it was worth more than she would make over the entire length of her life, should she live to be the oldest asari in recorded history. Only, Liara had come out the front door, skipped down the stairs, and flashed her the biggest damn smile Teiron had ever seen, and it just didn't matter to her anymore. There had been pictures of Liara's daughters and of Shepard scattered around the common areas of the house. One wall had a large, pre-spaceflight triptych depicting Athame and her companions. On a table in the corner sat a bound copy of the Holy Texts. Teiron had never seen such a book before, the vellum it was printed on so fragile that Liara had put it under glass. She had never before considered what it meant that her friend was a _T'Soni._

And they had sat on the screened in porch at the back of the house and drunk way too much and had talked about their lives and their lovers and their families and about nothing in particular.

"I think about it sometimes," Liara had said, holding her liquor much better than she had the last time they had drunk together, "what things would have been like if...things with me had been different."

"Pretty crappy, probably. We'd have either ended badly, or if we hadn't we'd all be eaten by those...whatchamacallits."

"Reapers."

"Right. The batarian eaters."

Liara hadn't laughed, hadn't so much as smiled. And that was familiar to Teiron, that was more like how their conversations at the bar had always ended. "Yeah," she'd said thoughtfully, standing up. "But I'd have been able to do this." She leaned over the table they were sitting at, moving their drinks carefully out of the way. She stretched herself over the table, and Teiron had a fleeting moment of déjà vu, or that's what the humans called it anyway. Liara had paused, her lips a fraction of an inch away from her own. "Any important calls?"

"Nothing that can't wait until morning," Teiron had breathed, hardly believing that this was happening. She'd been afraid to blink, afraid she'd find it was nothing more than fantasy running away with her. But then their lips had met, and things had been damn near perfect. It wasn't a long kiss, or terribly passionate. It was almost chaste.

And then it wasn't, and they moving, and this, too, had been familiar in a long-lost sort of way.

"I better not wake up in the hospital," she had joked, mostly hoping that if this wasn't going to happen, that Liara would stop it now before she let herself wish again.

"Not a chance in hell," Liara had muttered against her lips, and she let herself be led up the stairs.

They had been bonded five years later.

Teiron still woke up most days and expected to be back in her tiny apartment on the Citadel, working a dead-end job, single and alone, her daughter off dancing in some sleezy bar. And then she'd roll over, and Liara would be there. She was fairly certain that to her dying day she wouldn't believe it was true. That this woman, this woman who had loved Commander-fucking-Shepard, could love her too.

Teiron jumped, lost in the memory, when Liara grabbed her hand and moved it. Lower, to the right, and she felt their baby move. There was something strangely exhilarating about feeling that. She'd been on the other end, and she'd never forget how amazing it was to feel the child move within her – when she wasn't using her internal organs as punching bags anyway – but this was wholly different.

"Foot?" she asked, as the soft movement came again.

Liara nodded, smiling, looking so terribly content that Teiron felt her heart swell. She wondered if Shepard had felt like this. No, she knew Shepard had felt like this. It was clear, on the pictures that were still scattered around the room.

There were more now. Pictures of Erra, of all six of them, Liara's three older girls, Erra and the two of them. Professional holos, snapshots. Liara had a rather strange hobby, taking images with an ancient earth camera, and the images she'd taken of Erra when she'd been younger hung on the wall as well. On one side of the fireplace hung the holo of their bonding, both smiling brightly, their hands locked together by the ceremonial bracelets, the ribbons twinning up their arms, all their daughters around them. And on the other, Liara's bonding holo with Shepard. The human soldier was in her Alliance dress blues, and though she was smiling she looked mildly confused at the way the ribbons knotted her arm to Liara's from wrist to elbow. Liara was laughing, her eyes shining, looking so terribly young. All three of her daughters were older than their mother was in that picture; she'd only been 109.

"You know," Teion said, standing and drawing Liara to her feet, "she was one hell of a lucky woman."

Liara looked up at her, one hand still on her swollen belly, the other tucked around Teiron's waist, then she looked over at the photos on the wall and shook her head.

She was thoughtful as she turned back to Teiron, her eyes bright.

"No. _I am."_


End file.
